October 16

Becoming forgiving

The lack of a forgiving spirit hurts our spiritual progress. Being unforgiving causes resentment, which is always a danger to our new way of life.

We have learned that if we forgive, we will be forgiven; but if we do not forgive, we will not be forgiven. So it seems we are just hurting ourselves by not forgiving others.

Am I forgiving?

Higher Power, help me forgive each person I need to forgive today.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

October 17

Acceptance is not submission; it is acknowledgment of the facts of a situation. Then deciding what you're going to do about it.
--Kathleen Casey Theisen

Recovery offers us courage to make choices about the events of our lives. Passive compliance with whatever is occurring need no longer dominate our pattern of behavior. Powerlessly watching our lives go by was common for many of us, and our feelings of powerlessness escalated the more idle we were.

Today, action is called for -- thoughtful action in response to the situations begging for our attention. Recovery's greatest gift is the courage to take action, to make decisions that will benefit us as well as the people who are close to us. Courage is the byproduct of our spiritual progress, courage to accept what we cannot change, believing that all will be well, courage to change in ourselves what we do have control over.

An exhilaration about life accompanies the taking of action. The spell that idleness casts over us is broken, and subsequent actions are even easier to take. Clearly, making a choice and acting on it is healthful. The program has given us the tools to do both.

Decisions will be called for today. I will be patient with myself, and thoughtful. I will listen closely to the guidance that comes from those around me.

You are reading from the book:

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

October 18

You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years of trying to get other people interested in you.
--Dale Carnegie

We wanted friends, but our addiction wanted all our attention. We had no time to be close to others.

Well, stand aside addiction! The program has taught us that others are important. Our purpose is to help others. People have become what's important to us.

Now we listen to others. We help them do what they want to do, not what we want them to do. We help people instead of use them. Friendship is now a way of life. And another promise of the program becomes a part of us.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me to know that I'm here to help others, not just myself. Through others, I find myself.

Today's Action

Today I'll help someone in the way he or she wants to be helped.

You are reading from the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

October 19

Accepting our limitations

Helen Keller said, "Life is a banquet and most of us are starving to death." Drinking and using sure kept us from seeing the beauty, the bounty in our lives. Since we recognized that we can't use or drink – and got clean and sober - most of us today can get higher than ever before on the important things like justice, peace, and love.

Those of us who seem successful in relationships have at some point learned to accept our shortcomings more than most.

Am I learning to accept my limitations?

Higher Power, help me accept myself today, with all my defects, knowing that in your time I will gradually change for the better.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

October 20

Today I Will Trust

Today, I will stop straining to know what I don't know.
To see what I can't see.
To understand what I don't yet understand.
I will trust that being is sufficient,
And I will let go of my need to figure things out.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

October 21

I wish my parents would trust me and understand that I am trying my hardest.
--Anonymous

Parents are hard to understand at times. Sometimes they give double messages. They tell us what is really important is that we try our hardest. Then they seem crushed when we do try our hardest but don't do as well as they expected. We sometimes wish they would stop getting themselves mixed up in us. We don't always want the things they want for us.

We hope our parents know that we're really trying. It's true that we'll make mistakes, but isn't that normal? It might help if we knew more about what it was like for them growing up. Maybe it's time to risk asking them.

Today let me get to know my parents a little better.

You are reading from the book:

Our Best Days by Nancy Hull-Mast

October 22

Happiness is a by product of an effort to make someone else happy.
--Gretta Brooker Palmer

Self-centeredness aggravates the natural flow of circumstances surrounding us; too much attention on ourselves distorts whatever might be troubling us. However, focusing on others' needs diminishes what we'd perceived as our own pressing need. This is a simple principle we might all consider adopting.

None of us is free of problems. That's one of life's givens. Through their resolution we grow and ready ourselves for the next group of challenges. Each group we survive enables us to offer better assistance to someone else who will confront a similar problem. Perhaps we'd do well to see all our problems as preparation for guiding someone who will come into our life. Helping someone else is certain to lift spirits and foster happiness, but the unexpected reward is that the helper reaps even greater benefits than the one helped.

My happiness is guaranteed if I help someone else find it today.

You are reading from the book:

The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey and Martha Vanceburg

October 23

Change Me
--Ruth C.'s Prayer

Change me, God,

Please change me.

Though I cringe,

Kick,

Resist and resent.

Pay no attention to me whatsoever.

When I run to hide

Drag me out of my safe little shelter.

Change me totally.

Whatever it takes.

However long You must work at the job.

Change me – and save me

From spiritual self-destruction.

You are reading from the book:

The 12 Step Prayer Book Volume 2 by Bill P. and Lisa D.

October 24

The evolution of human growth is an evolution from an absolute need to be loved towards a full readiness to give love.
--Dr. Karl Stern

As children, we looked to our parents for love, for clothes and food, for an indication of who we were. If our needs were met, we felt secure. As developing adults, we still seek love. We continue yearning for security and all too often our self-definition comes through someone else. But a healthy sign of our growth is revealed each time we extend love to another with no thought that love is owed us in return.

We can show our love in myriad ways - a genuine smile, a note of appreciation, an unexpected favor, perhaps flowers, or a phone call. Warmly giving another attention in any form is an act of love, one that will be repaid in full by someone, at some time.

The ease with which we genuinely love others is directly proportional to our commitment to loving as a priority in our lives. To love is a decision first, an action second, a value next.

You are reading from the book:

Worthy of Love by Karen Casey

October 25

We're not given more than we can handle.

Sometimes I take on more than I can comfortably manage - that’s one of the ways in which my life becomes unmanageable. It happens when I'm operating according to self-will rather than the will of a Higher Power.

I believe that God does not expect more of me than I can produce, that along with the challenges and difficulties I encounter comes the strength I need to cope with them and learn from them. When chaos threatens, I'm either taking on more than I should, or I'm not using the resources available to me.

With recovery, we learn to arrange our priorities so that we do not get worn out with compulsive activity and busy-ness. Everything becomes more manageable when we're not trying to run the show by ourselves. Solid experience teaches us that support is always at hand, that our Higher Power comes through for us when we ask for help.

I will face today's tasks confident that I will be given the ability to accomplish my Higher Power's will for me.

You are reading from the book:

Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L.

October 26

Do not be afraid of the ego. It depends on your mind, and as you made it by believing in it, so you can dispel it by withdrawing belief from it.
--A Course in Miracles

Some of us are fond of saying "the devil made me do it" when we've done something we're not too proud of. We might as well say "the ego made me do it" because the ego is our own personal "devil."

Sometimes we like to claim that we weren't in complete control of our actions, that we were overcome by an irresistible urge. We can't, however, say that with a clear conscience. At one time in our addictive past, maybe, but not now. Now, we can be responsible. An urge can overcome us only to the extent that we let it - only as we give it the power of believing in it.

We have a choice. We can listen to the voice of our ego or the voice of God. How can we tell the difference? By how we feel. The ego's urgings always leave us with some misgivings. God's guidance assures us.

I choose to listen to the voice of assurance.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

October 27

It's easy to look at all the tasks and unsolved problems and feel so pressured that we get paralyzed and don't get anything done. It takes discipline to gather in our scattered forces and focus on one thing, one day, one step, and sometimes one hour – even when taking only that one step can seem so trivial in the face of all that looms.

Inventory Focus:
Are you creating unnecessary fear and drama by taking on more than you handle? Are you willing to trade in the I'm-out-of-control-and-overwhelmed feeling for a sense of manageability? Do you have any history with deliberately living life one day or one step at a time? How did that work?

Plans, goals, and dreams are good, but the only way to get there is one day at a time.

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie

October 28

I often think I'm not doing enough with my life. I paint, I golf, I dabble, but is that enough?
--Abby Warman

Nobody can answer the question posed by Abby but ourselves. The point is, are we content? If we hesitate even a moment before replying, perhaps we need to reconsider how we're spending our time.

The solution to fulfillment is simple: Express only love to the others in our lives. It's not what we do, ever, but how we do it. If focusing on giving only love and acceptance to others gives us pleasure, could we want for anything more?

There is nothing anyone can do that's more important than helping another person feel loved or forgiven, if that's called for. Whether we are working or merely at play, our opportunities are unending. We'll know we have done enough if we have welcomed them.

Today I can offer love to someone quite easily. Both of us will be rewarded.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

October 29

An honest man's the noblest work of God.
--Alexander Pope

Step Five says, "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs." When we did this Step, the person we admitted our wrongs to didn't run away or reject us. That person stuck with us. Chances are, we were told that we are quite human. And working Step Five helped us to see that we can change, now that we're sober.

The most important part of Step Five is the act of being totally honest about ourselves. Then we know that relationships - with our Higher Power, ourselves, and others - can be built. We have faced the truth. Now we know we never have to lie.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, I know no Fifth Step is perfect. Please help me be as honest as I can in doing my Fifth Step and at other times.

Action for the Day

If I've avoided doing a Fifth Step, I'll talk to my sponsor about it today.

You are reading from the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

October 30

When a person is concerned only with giving, there is no anxiety.
--Gerald Jampolsky

Whatever we give away returns to us, many-fold. When we show love or understanding, when we are gentle or express genuine concern, usually the same will come right back to us. Perhaps not in kind, maybe not in ways we expected, nevertheless our gifts bear fruit.

Many of us have longed for love and security to come from others with a promise of forever; inevitably, we became anxious that, in time, that love or security would disappear. When we view life from such a narrow perspective, no amount of love can bolster our sense of worth.

How different the world looks when we unselfishly give out love rather than longingly await the love, attention, or understanding of others. We guarantee receiving the good feelings we crave every time we share those feelings with a fellow traveler.

I am in charge of what I receive from others today. I will get back what I willingly give.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey