FOOD FOR THOUGHT - OA FOR NOVEMBER 2014
 

We may love our food, but it doesn't love us back, in fact it can become our worst enemy.

Have always believed if you have enough for one, you have enough to feed two.


An awesome statement, very freeing and very enlightening. My sponsor use to say, never give away more than you can afford to lose.

Moderation must be a learned behaviour and/or a God given gift, it never was a part of my thought process or work behaviour over the years. It was all or nothing at all, in all that I did. Whether it came to food, work, or play.

A good thought! Enough for some, may not be enough for someone else. Trying to define another and being judge and jury, doesn't work. I have problems judging what is good for me, how can I know what is right for someone else. All I can do is share what worked for me and the any awareness I achieved over the years.

It is about self-honesty. What is good for me, for my size, for my health and well being.

Had the thought today about how much of recovery is working on the emotions, and how we deal with them in healthy ways, without using food and other substances to deal with them. Not only about using food, but not substituting other things, that lead to another state of obsessive, compulsive behaviour.

Acceptance is the key. Fighting only brings more, letting go opens the door to healing.

My mother was a good cook. She made everything from scratch. Her cakes turned out better than ones made out of one from a cake mix. Yet our cooking relationship was not a good one and I don't associate food as a comfort thing with her, what she cooked yes, but not our mother/daughter relationship. She passed away when I was 21 and I left home at the age of 17. I wasn't allowed to do much cooking because I didn't do it right and don't remember cooking although I did, because she was sick and we had a boarder and I took over the mother role. Strange, will have to give this some thought.

Don't mind clean up my life. I have always had issues with cleaning up dishes after a meal. I hate doing dishes and it is a long time thing from my childhood. Perhaps I am a little overdue in asking for healing in this area. I truly believe my mother had fibromyalgia and she would let things go and then would do everything at once and then it was clean, clean, clean. It was a big chore when it happened. Instead of making it simple as you go thing, it became a monstrous task filled with dread and horror, especially as a child. It is surprising how many body memories we have, not sure how much it will help me to love doing dishes, but I think God and I will have a little talk about this.

Never had a birthday party until I was 16. Very few after that as I recall, and in later years I tried to make them special. They were more of a sad time than a good time, more like a time of drowning my sorrows than a time of celebration, not to mention the fact that I didn't like the fact that I was growing another year older.

I can't, my God can, just for today, I choose to let Him.

Why wait until we are lost and find ourselves in a place where we don't want to be, before we ask for direction? They say it is the nature of our disease and the fact that we are human; and yet thanks to this program, we can recognize when we are heading that way, we can stop and turn around and not go the whole route, get to a dead end, or take a detour. We can turn our life around with some good orderly direction if we but surrender to the program and just ask for help.

As my sponsor called it, quit trying to figure it out. Stop intellectualizing, accept, live in the moment, don't look for the whys and how and wheres, and just be.

As I have said before, "One of my not so good little talks with my God would go along this line: ...couldn't you just give me a little hint so we both will know."

Like the last line, we can pray and ask our God to light our way to what we need to know, to be lead to the awakening and awareness we need to change our habits, to lessen our stress, to reduce our anxiety, to increase our hope and faith.

Like these words. One of my favourite sayings is, "God is as He reveals Himself to me in today." How can I see Him if I see Him if I have my eyes closed and my blinders on? How can I see His truth if I have tunnel vision and look through rose-coloured glasses?

What a nice thought to start the day. Haven't heard that phrase for a long time. "Your truth shall set you free."

http://rickwarren.org/devotional/eng...-sets-you-free

The thought that came to mind was, "If you don't want to know the truth, don't ask for it! If we don't want to be alive to the truth, there is a good chance of the opposite. We will be dead. My mother carried that message. She was told to lose weight and if she didn't watch her food intake and her heart condition, and she ended up in the hospital again, she would not leave, and she didn't. She was 28 days shy of her 41st birthday. They say you can't scare an addict. She didn't change.

She went out and chased cows rather than wait for the men to come and home to get them back into the fields to mend the broken gate. The caretaker, the doer, the fixer, and the person who handled her emotions by eating. I also believe in today, that she too had Fibromyalgia. She used food to deal with her pain. My father was an alcoholic and he did what a lot of alcoholics do and she covered up her hurts using food.

How often I used my bed to escape the reality I didn't want to face. I am powerless over people, places, and things.

Amen

The word voracious came to mind, and how our addiction can be all consuming and as I like to say, when I get needy, I get greedy.

Old tapes can show themselves up in many ways. It is up to us to recognize them for what they are. I found it best to erase them an make new ones. I also had to recognize the fact that I was the one who had the choice as to whether I pushed the buttons rewind, delete, play, or fast forward.

One of the biggest spiritual experiences I had in recovery was hearing someone saying, "I drank to someone's health so often and didn't realize that I was ruining my own." How many times I stuffed and drowned my feelings, because I thought "I'll show them!" or said, "Don't tell me what to do, watch me."

The program is applicable to all areas of my life. My emotional and mental state as well as my physical and spiritual state of well being.

Sunday, November 23, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought


Turning On

Before OA, many of us were in a self-centered rut. We had little enthusiasm for anything except food, and food proved to be a false friend. When we come to OA and admit that we are powerless over food, we can turn on to a Power greater than ourselves.

Just as we do not need to understand the complexities of electricity in order to benefit from it, we do not need to understand everything about God in order to receive His power. Taking the Twelve Steps turns us on to a new way of life, motivated by faith in a Higher Power.

Turning on to this Power means that we are no longer alone. We do not have to try to run our lives by ourselves. God can and will relieve us of our obsession with food and our obsession with self. He gives us strength and enthusiasm for the living of our daily lives. Through surrender, we become recipients of the Power of the universe.

Take away the blindness that prevents us from turning on to Your power.

Monday, November 24, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Principles Before Personalities

One of the strengths of our fellowship lies in the fact that we place principles before personalities. OA is not a social club. We form meaningful and lasting friendships, but personal friendship is always subordinate to the program itself.

Putting principles before personalities means that we may expect help and consideration from any other member. Conversely, we are expected to give our attention and assistance to anyone who asks, regardless of how well we like that individual personally. The Twelve Steps and principles of OA unity are more important than the personal relationships of any members in our group.

Because we are committed to abstinence from compulsive overeating and to working the program, we respond honestly and say what we believe to be in the best interest of those we sponsor and those we talk with. We do no one a favor if we dilute our program in order to make it more palatable to someone we personally like.

May I remember to place principles before personalities.

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought


Regaining Control

Temporary loss of control resulting in a slip does not need to send us off on a protracted binge. We have tools, which we may use to regain control and reestablish firm abstinence.

If we find ourselves deviating from our food plan, however slightly, we need to make contact with our sponsor or another OA member. Honestly admitting that we are having trouble prevents us from losing touch with reality and slipping back into our old habits. If we pretend that all is well when it is not, we cut ourselves off from the help and support we need.

When we are tempted, it is a good idea to remove ourselves from the source of temptation and get involved in another activity. Reading the literature or going to a meeting can renew our OA commitment.

In the last analysis, it is our Higher Power who provides the control, which we lack. To turn over our lack of control is to open ourselves to the Power that keeps us abstinent.

Control my life. Lord.

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought


What Am I Avoiding Now?

If I am becoming preoccupied with thoughts of food and eating, I am probably avoiding something in the present, which troubles me. We compulsive overeaters have a long history of using food to avoid facing whatever is bothering us. Abstaining may not solve the problem, but at least we do not eat ourselves into a worse situation.

Sometimes we are aware of a difficult task that needs to be done, and we think we require extra food to fortify ourselves in order to accomplish the task. Remembering that excess food incapacitates rather than strengthens is essential to our recovery. A short-term euphoria is not worth the long-term anguish, which inevitably follows loss of control.

We are learning to turn to a Power greater than ourselves when we have problems that we formerly avoided or tried to solve by eating. Whatever our perplexity, God has the answer, if we will surrender our wills and listen for His guidance.

Teach me to trust You completely.

Never forgot the day in treatment when a counsellor asked one of the girls, "What does binge taste like?"

For many, it means many things. For most of us, it is one is too many and a thousand isn't enough.

Friday, November 28, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought


A Strong Father

Many of us understand God in terms of a father, one on whom we can rely no matter what the situation. Our biological father may have been a tyrant or a pal, remote or accessible, firm or weak. However much we loved him and depended on him, he was only a person and not infallible.

For recovery from compulsive overeating, we need a source of strength to which we may turn in any emergency. We require a Power to lean on through the minor ups and downs of every day. Though our families and friends support us, their assistance is not enough. They can provide neither the control nor the sustenance, which we need in order to recover from our illness.

The firm, unfailing guidance which we require comes from our Higher Power. If we are willing to again become as children and cast ourselves on God without reservation, we shall receive His support. It is His Power that frees us from our false dependency on food.

Be for us a strong Father, we pray.

Saturday, November 29, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought


Flexibility

If we examine our behavior patterns when we were eating compulsively, we usually find that they were quite rigid. Our mental obsession and physical addiction kept us bound in repetitious behavior, which permitted very little spontaneity. With so much time and energy tied up in eating, we had very little flexibility. Most of our free time was used to support our addiction in one way or another.

As we recover, we may find ourselves threatened by unstructured time or by impromptu changes in schedule. An unexpected holiday can bring on feelings of emptiness or boredom. Changed plans can leave us feeling confused and unsettled. Without a firm routine, we may become uneasy.

Remembering that abstinence is the most important thing in our life without exception can provide an anchor when we are required to be flexible. As long as we remain abstinent, we are free to alter schedules and plans according to preference and convenience. Flexibility and spontaneity are possible when abstinence is firm.

Show me how to be flexible.

Sunday, November 30, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought


Survival

We will never make it if we feel we are responsible for solving everyone else's problems. It is tempting to our ego to feel that we can exercise control over the lives of those around us, but it is counter to reality. We cannot protect those we love from sadness, sickness, or pain. Making martyrs of ourselves only prepares the ground for future retaliation.

Our primary task is to remember our dependence on our Higher Power and by His grace to maintain our abstinence. The problems, which we face, are best deal with if our spiritual condition is strong. Without abstinence from compulsive overeating, we are not much help to anyone, least of all ourselves.

There are times when all we can manage is to hang on, to survive. We know in our heads that these times will eventually pass. Practicing Step Eleven convinces us in our hearts that God is in charge, no matter how far away He may seem to be.

By Your grace, may I survive the hard times.