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Daily Recovery Readings - December
December 1
Daily Reflections "SUGGESTED" STEPS Our Twelfth Step also says that as a result of practicing all the Steps, we have each found something called a spiritual awakening. . . . A.A.'s manner of making ready to receive this gift lies in the practice of the Twelve Steps in our program." TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 106-07 I remember my sponsor's answer when I told him that the Steps were "suggested." He replied that they are "suggested" in the same way that, if you were to jump out of a airplane with a parachute, it is "suggested" that you pull the ripcord to save your life. He pointed out that it was "suggested" I practice the Twelve Steps, if I wanted to save my life. So I try to remember daily that I have a whole program of recovery based on all Twelve of the "suggested" Steps. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The thoughts that come before having a slip are often largely subconscious. It is a question whether or not our subconscious minds ever become entirely free from alcoholic thoughts as long as we live. For instance, some of us dream about being drunk when we are asleep, even after several years of sobriety in A.A. During the period of our drinking days, our subconscious minds have been thoroughly conditioned by our alcoholic way of thinking and it is doubtful that they ever become entirely free of such thoughts during our lifetime. But when our conscious minds are fully conditioned against drinking, we can stay sober and our subconscious minds do not often bother us. Am I still conditioning my conscious mind? Meditation For The Day Having sympathy and compassion for all who are in temptation, a condition which we are sometimes in, we have a responsibility towards them. Sympathy always includes responsibility. Pity is useless because it does not have a remedy for the need. But wherever our sympathy goes, our responsibility goes too. When we are moved with compassion, we should go to the one in need and bind up his wounds as best we can. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may have sympathy for those in temptation. I pray that I may have compassion for others' trials. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Quantity or Quality, p. 11 "About this slip business--I would not be too discouraged. I think you are suffering a great deal from a needless guilt. For some reason or other, the Lord has laid out tougher paths for some of us, and I guess you are treading one of them. God is not asking us to be successful. He is only asking us to try to be. That, you surely are doing, and have been doing. So I would not stay away from A.A. through any feeling of discouragement or shame. It's just the place you should be. Why don't you try just as a member? You don't have to carry the whole A.A. on your back, you know! "It is not always the quantity of good things that you do, it is also the quality that counts. "Above all, take it one day at a time." Letter, 1958 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Why do bad things happen? Understanding life No one has been able to explain why pain and misfortune must be part of the human condition. Bad things can and do happen to everybody, and sometimes there's no way to explain it. Even in sobriety, AA members have misfortunes---times when it appears that God is hiding. We even hear members share such experiences at meetings. Many of us have found ways to use misfortunes constructively, however, by seeing how the program helps us deal with it. In some cases---but not all---we even learn that a misfortune was a disguised blessing. Most important, by using the program, we are eliminating the drinking that has been the cause of many misfortunes in our lives. That alone makes our immediate world a much better place for everyone. My life today can be both easy and hard. It gives me great comfort to know that I am not making conditions worse for myself and others. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps---First part of Step Twelve. We are awake! Our spirits are alive. We are part of the world. Our addiction no longer clouds our vision. How? Step Twelve answers this. The beauty of Step Twelve is that if we feel our spirits starting to go dead, we know how to awaken them. It's simple. Turn to the Steps. After all, working the Steps has awakened our spirits. The hope and serenity we feel are gifts given to us through the Steps of our program. And the more we turn to the Steps for help, the more life we'll feel. The Steps are what feed and heal our souls. Prayer for the Day Higher Power: Thank you for the Steps. If I start to believe it is I who keeps me sober, remind me of my life before the Twelve Steps. Action for the Day: Today, I'll read the Twelve Steps. I'll think of how each Step helped awaken my spirit. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning And it isn't the thing you do, dear, It's the thing you leave undone Which gives you a bit of a heartache At the setting of the sun. --Margaret Sangster A quality we all share, a very human quality, is to expect perfection from ourselves, to expect the impossible in all tasks done. We must rejoice for the good we do. Each time we pat ourselves on the back for a job well done, our confidence grows a little bit more. Recovery is best measured by our emotional and spiritual health, expressed in our apparent confidence and trust in "the process." We need to recognize and celebrate our strong points, and they'll gain even more strength. Likewise, we need to practice prayer and listening to guidance first to develop our ties to God, but more importantly to be able to acknowledge when help is at hand. We can do all we need to do with God's help. Having goals but keeping them realistic, for the day or the year, is a sign of emotional health. Not dwelling on those that can't be accomplished, at the moment, is another sign. A change of attitude is all most of us need to move from where we are to a better place emotionally. There's never a better time than right now for rejoicing over what I've done. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. pp. 83-84 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. I did a lot of drinking on the job. Carpenters worked in shorts and had coolers of beer. There were beer cans all around the job site. I would go to the allnight store early every morning to buy a bottle of wine for my thermos, to keep me going until lunch. Then I'd buy wine at lunch for the afternoon. And on my way home I'd buy a six-pack of beer and a bottle of wine for my evening. That was the cycle of my life. p. 481 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Eleven - "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out." Perhaps one of the greatest rewards of meditation and prayer is the sense of belonging that comes to us. We no longer live in a completely hostile world. We are no longer lost and frightened and purposeless. The moment we catch even a glimpse of God's will, the moment we begin to see truth, justice, and love as the real and eternal things in life, we are no longer deeply disturbed by all the seeming evidence to the contrary that surrounds us in purely human affairs. We know that God lovingly watches over us. We know that when we turn to Him, all will be well with us, here and hereafter. p. 105 ************************************************** ********* "Beware of little expenses. A small leak will sink a great ship." --Benjamin Franklin "There are no gains without pains." --Benjamin Franklin Kindness is more than deeds. It is an attitude, an expression, a look, a touch. It is anything that lifts another person. --C. Neil Strait Kind words do not cost much. Yet they accomplish much. --Blaise Pascal "It is a sign of strength, not of weakness, to admit that you don't know all the answers." --John P. Loughrane "What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity." --Joseph Addison ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation GOSSIP "Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss wants, small minds discuss people." -- Laurence J. Peter Gossip is ultimately a form of malicious cowardice. It is a "blasphemy" because it seeks to denigrate the human being that God has made in His image. As a practicing alcoholic I was a gossip. I exaggerated and manipulated the truth with my gossip. I made up stories against those people I had a resentment towards; innocent people were abused and victimized by my gossip. Also I loved listening to gossip. The listener plays an important role in the life of "gossip" because without the listener it could not exist. It takes two to gossip! Today gossip is unacceptable behavior in my program. ************************************************** ********* But someone will say, "You have faith; I have deeds." Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by what I do. James 2:18 "If I say I will forget my complaint, I will change my expression and smile." Job 9:27 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Accept yourself for who you are because who you are has a purpose and an important reason for being. Lord, Your love for me makes me special and lovable. Take care of yourself so that you may give care to others. Lord, may I never totally ignore myself and my feelings for the sake of others and fit in time daily to refresh my spirit. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Life's Rewards "We begin to pray only for God's will for us. That way, we get only what we are capable of handling." Basic Text pg. 47 Imagine what might happen if God gave us everything we wanted. A fabulous new car, straight A's, a triple salary raise - all ours without effort, just for the asking. Now imagine the problems that come along with unearned riches, new luxury cars, and unmerited scholastic recognition. What would we do with a huge salary raise that had been granted for no reason? How would we handle our new financial responsibilities? And how would we live up to that raise? Could we ever make it appear that we deserve such pay when we know we don't? What about that fantastic new car? Most come with expensive insurance premiums and hefty maintenance costs. Are we prepared to care for what we've asked for? Academic honors? Could we perform like A students after we'd been given high marks we hadn't earned? What would we do if we were exposed as frauds? When we talk to God, we need to remember that we live in the real world. We earn rewards and learn to handle them as we do. Confining our prayers to requests for knowledge of God's will, the power to carry it out, and the ability to live with the consequences will ensure that we get no more than we can handle. Just for today: I will pray only for knowledge of God's will and the power to carry that out in the real world. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Go rich in poverty. Go rich in poetry. --May Sarton Poetry lets us put the beauty of nature--the clouds, the flowers, and the waterfall--into words. Poetry lets us see that things, which appear to be opposites, may just be different ways of looking at the same thing. How can we be rich in poverty? Wealth in poverty means finding pleasure in simplicity, finding the core of what's important, and saying it in the fewest possible words. We are so often caught up in the pursuit of more--more money, more toys, more prestige that we forget how satisfying the simple things can be. Think of the beauty of a sunset or a walk by the river, the fun of playing in a sandbox or swinging on the swings in the park, or in simply taking time to get something done the right way, without hurry. What riches lie around me right this moment? You are reading from the book Touchstones. In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. --Albert Camus Sometimes we suddenly see or sense opposite emotions within ourselves. The cold of winter presses in on us, and we may feel tested by its bite. Yet, when we think we cannot bear it a moment longer, we find a counterforce within, an inner reassurance that comes like a summer breeze and says we can do what we must. Perhaps it comes in a time of dark despair, and we realize that at least we've made it this far. We are pretty tough. In our deepest sadness about the loss of a love, we may find a more meaningful contact with our Higher Power. The opposites in our lives may tempt us to fight them. One side may be very clear and obvious while the other side is hidden. When we are open, these extremes are spiritual teachers for us. As we think about life and our feelings today, what opposites do we find? Today, I will remember that I have an invincible summer at the deepest part of winter in my life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. And it isn't the thing you do, dear, It's the thing you leave undone Which gives you a bit of a heartache At the setting of the sun. --Margaret Sangster A quality we all share, a very human quality, is to expect perfection from ourselves, to expect the impossible in all tasks done. We must rejoice for the good we do. Each time we pat ourselves on the back for a job well done, our confidence grows a little bit more. Recovery is best measured by our emotional and spiritual health, expressed in our apparent confidence and trust in "the process." We need to recognize and celebrate our strong points, and they'll gain even more strength. Likewise, we need to practice prayer and listening to guidance first to develop our ties to God, but more importantly to be able to acknowledge when help is at hand. We can do all we need to do with God's help. Having goals but keeping them realistic, for the day or the year, is a sign of emotional health. Not dwelling on those that can't be accomplished, at the moment, is another sign. A change of attitude is all most of us need to move from where we are to a better place emotionally. There's never a better time than right now for rejoicing over what I've done. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Letting People Be There for Us Sometimes, we need nurturing. Sometimes, we need people to support us. Many of us have been deprived of support and nurturing for so long we may not realize it's something we want and need. Many of us have learned to block our stop ourselves from getting what we want and need. We may not reach out to have our needs met. We may be in relationships with people who cannot or will not be available to meet our needs. Or we may be in relationships with people who would be happy to respond to a direct request from us. We may have to give up something to do this. We may have to let go of our martyr or victim role. If we ask for what we want and need, and get those needs met, we will not be able to punish people, or push them away later on, for disappointing us. We may have to let go of our fears enough to experience the intimacy that will occur when we allow someone to love and support us. We may even have to learn, one day at a time, how to be happy and content. Learn to let others be there for us. Today, I will be open to identifying what I need from people, and I will ask for what I want directly. I will let others be there for me. I am okay about me today and that is terrific. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Let Yourself Be Who You Are It’s difficult to be around people who are trying to be perfect– perfectly healthy , perfectly polite, perfectly poised, perfectly controlled. Remember that being human means being imperfect, being flawed. Let yourself be. Let others be. Slouch in your chair. Eat with the wrong fork. Laugh out loud. Stand up and reveal who you are and know that you’re good enough. Stop worrying that people will find out who you really are. Instead, hope that they do. Help them by openly sharing yourself and being not who you think you should be, but who you really are. Freedom is just a small step away– a step into self-love and acceptance. When you take it, others will follow. And they’ll be grateful you led the way. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Say how sweet it is Many of us have been seeking diligently for the meaning of life, at least for the meaning of our lives. I thought I had found it when I began recovering from chemical dependency. Aha, I thought. The meaning of life is to stay sober. Then along came codependecy and my need to recover from those issues. Surely, the seach for enlightenment would culminate there. No, not yet. It was as if there was a big locked metal door. On one side of it was supreme knowledge of why we’re here, that elusive “thing” called enlightenment. I was on the other side of the door, locked out, searching for the key. Over the years, I’ve been to therapists, doctors, and healers. I’ve used homeopathy, kinesiology, acupuncture, and acupressure. In my youth, I tried alcohol and drugs, thinking they were the answer. I looked for the answer to the meaning of life in relationships. Then I searched for enlightenent by avoiding commitment and romantic love at any cost. I’ve tried Gestalt therapy, transactional analysis, hypnotherapy, prayer, and meditation,too. Over the past twenty-seven years, I’ve actively participated in more than one Twelve Step program in this quest for truth. I’ve dutifully plodded through the grinding work so many people have come to know as family of origin work. Hooray, I finally found and healed my inner child. I even have a fuzzy teddy bear on the floor next to my bed. After my son died, I stayed with every moment of my grief until I worked through it by finally accepting the lifetime handicap that I would live in spite of the loss of Shane. I’ve perused A Course in Miracles, learning with Marianne Williamson’s help about the magic of love in all its myriad shapes and forms. At last, I opened my heart. But the search for enlightenment eluded me. I wasn’t depressed, but my spirit ached. I started traveling, first around the United States and then around the world. I visited the vortexes of Sedona, the ancient Anasazi village in Chaco Canyon, and the Santuarior de Chimayo, the blessed Mexican church. I should have been glowing in the dark. Occasionally, I glimpsed the Light. But I still didn’t understand what life was all about. Maybe tomorrow I’ll find that key, I’d think. It seemed as if enlightenment was always one day, one step, one therapist, one book, one healer away. Over twenty years ago, when I was already well immersed in this quest, a trusted friend told me that the secret to life was simple: there wasn’t one. Maybe my friend was right. Maybe I was looking for something that didn’t exist. One day, I stopped looking. It wasn’t that I gave up. I gave in. I stopped waiting to win the spiritual lottery. Stopped trying to become enlightened. Stopped looking for that perfect soul mate. And started surrendering to enjoying each moment of my life– just as it is. That’s when I found joy. Or maybe joy found me. The key to enlightenment might be simpler than we think. We’re here to experience joy. Look at each moment in your life and learn to say, How sweet it is. God, help me learn joy. *************************************** Learning To Meditate From the Learning To Meditate On-Line Course by Madisyn Taylor The following is an excerpt from the "Learning to Meditate" on-line course. If you would like to take the entire course, click here. My wish for you is that meditation can be an opportunity to begin a simple practice of self-acceptance and self-love. If the mere idea of meditating feels uncomfortable—or scary even, that's okay. Exploring unknown territory usually does. But don't worry, you won't turn into a hippie, have to change your friends, or pack up and move to a commune in order to reap the benefits of your meditation practice. This is a gift you're giving yourself and nobody even needs to know you are meditating, but you just might love it so much that you will want to teach your friends and family. Let's take a moment to get clear on what meditation really is. The term "meditation" can refer to any process that leads you to an inner state of relaxed awareness. There needn't be any big mystery or drama about the process itself, and there's really no right or wrong way of doing it. There are simply different techniques that can be used as tools to help you focus and quiet your mind, and we'll work with some of these as the weeks unfold. This will allow you to choose which method works best for you as a person. We have all seen the vision of the yogi sitting crossed legged wearing robes and perhaps meditating in a cave. This is not what meditation is about for most of us and starting with an unrealistic idea of what meditation is about won't make it an enjoyable experience for you. I still have a hard time quieting my mind and I find that my meditation practice is more fulfilling for me while I'm in nature. Our main purpose here is to help you develop a meditation pra! ctice that's right for you. It'll be something you feel comfortable doing and that you're willing and able to do regularly. For those of us who already have a meditation routine, we've come to depend on the way our practice enhances our lives. We've discovered an ever-present source of inner peace and wisdom from which we can now draw strength, courage, clarity and compassion. It has become easier to respond to situations from a calm and grounded place, rather than acting out old dysfunctional patterns. We're also better able to navigate our lives in alignment with our own needs and goals. By giving ourselves the space to simply be ourselves, many of the distractions from other people's agendas melt away. For many of us, meditation has become an important way to take really good care of ourselves. You wouldn't dream about leaving your house in the morning without bathing or brushing your teeth and this is eventually how you will feel about your practice. A morning meditation will give you the quiet confidence and the strength you will need for your day. Research has linked a regular practice of meditation to reduced levels of anxiety and stress, in addition to improved immune function and a host of other health benefits. Studies have shown that the nervous system actually begins responding differently to stressful situations—creativity flows more freely and new solutions begin to emerge. What's wonderful is that many of these advantages occur after just one session and continue evolving with regular practice. As you develop your own meditation program, you'll be able to track the benefits for yourself, from changes in your mood to improvements in your energy. Soon you will find yourself reacting from a place of centered calm rather than from your head. GETTING STARTED The best results of meditation are seen in those who make it a regular practice. And as with anything, practicing consistently carves out a behavioral pattern that becomes more established and easier to follow over time. Try not to be hard on yourself as you begin this process. You're the only one who can take this journey and the best place to start is right where you are. At first you may not be able to sit for more than a few minutes and that's ok, but soon you'll be meditating for 10, 20 or 30 minutes with ease. The idea is to get a habit started, so aim for consistency (i.e., meditating 10 minutes a day, every day) over longer sessions (i.e., meditating for a whole half hour, every once in a while). You generally don't need to purchase anything to start a meditation routine and no special equipment or clothing is required as long as you're comfortable. Some people buy what's known as a meditation cushion, but it's certainly not necessary. Some also find that lighting a candle or incense signals an official start to their meditation and this can help the mind to focus. (Chimes, singing bowls and bells may also be used for this purpose.) Next week, we'll be exploring some particular meditation practices that use candles and incense, so if you don't already have these around your home, you may want to get some that you'll enjoy working with. It is not uncommon for inspiring ideas and solutions to emerge during meditation. I always have a journal with me so I can jot down what comes up and return to my session without fear of losing the idea. You may want to experiment with this as well. It can help your mind return to silence. Positioning Let's explore a few different ways of sitting. You may be familiar with the classic lotus position or half-lotus position (see photos below) in which many long-term meditators are pictured. This position is ideal because it allows for a balanced and unobstructed flow of energy throughout the energy centers of your body. Some people cannot sit this way because they are physically inflexible or having back or knee issues. You may find that over time you gain the flexibility to meditate in the lotus position; or, you may simply decide that an alternate posture works better for you. Please don't feel that you have to sit in these positions right away, it can take time to build up to it. The key to remember when selecting your meditation position is that you'll want to keep your back straight and your palms open or facing upward. There are a few different positions for your hands to take during meditation, but for the purpose of this course we will place our hands open toward the sky and having them rest on your thighs, knees or ankles depending on what is comfortable once you are in position with the rest of your body. Here are some positions you might try: Using a Chair: Sit with your feet on the floor, spine straight against the back of the chair, and your shoulders back. If needed, you can add a pillow behind you for lower back support. On the Floor: Sit crossed legged or in half or full lotus position. You may want to place a pillow under your tailbone for comfort. On the Floor, against the Wall: If you have trouble getting your back straight, start out sitting against a wall. If necessary, fold up a small towel to tuck under your tailbone. This is usually the easiest position for beginners, with a wall supporting the back. Over time your muscles will get stronger and the support of a wall will likely become unnecessary. In Your Bed: If sitting up straight is difficult or painful for you, start out lying down. Most of us associate our bed with sleeping and this can be a problem, as it may create the tendency to fall asleep. But turn yourself 90 degrees on the bed if it's big enough, or turn yourself 180 degrees and do not use pillows—this may trick your mind to stay awake, as your head will be at a different place than it usually is during the night. Once you have more meditation experience under your belt, try to move from the bed. The bed may also be used in a sitting position with your back against your headboard and pillows placed under your hipbones to get a nice straight spine. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day It has truly been said that “We become what we do.” It’s emphasized to us over and over in The Program that our thoughts and actions toward others color and shape our spiritual lives. Words and acts of kindness, generosity, thoughtfulness and forgiveness serve to strengthen those qualities within us that heighten our consciousness of God’s love. In asking God to direct and guide my life, am I also asking love to take over and lead me where it will? Today I Pray May I make a resolute attempt at acting out the way I want to be — loving, forgiving, kind, thoughtful. May I be aware that each small, attentive act carries with it an echo of God’s all-caring. For God so loved the world; may we make His love our example. Today I Will Remember We become what we do. *************************************** One More Day The wise man looks at death with honesty, dignityu and calm, recognizing that the tragedy it brings is inherent in the great gift of life. – Corliss Lamont Chronic illness trends to heighten our awareness of the fragility of life. Some of us may even become concerned that due to poor health we may not live as long as we’d once expected. To ease our fears, we may feel better if we initiated a conversation with family members about dying. Since each one of us have personal ideas about how we would like our funeral handled — which hymns, who will say the eulogy, and where it should be held — it only makes sense to share that information with loved ones. Few people feel comfortable talking about the possibility of dying, but with a straightforward discussion we can, at least for a while, set aside our own anxieties. I am comforted knowing my family understands my fears and needs. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ SPIRITUALITY ~ When the heart weeps for what it has lost, the spirit laughs for what it has found. Sufi proverb Before I came into this program, I had thrown God out the window. In fact, I was plain angry at Him. Where was He when my only brother was killed in a car accident, when my only nephews were lost to me for many years as a result? Where was He when my parents died, when I went through my ugly divorce, when my step-son committed suicide, or when I had two major car accidents? I didn't know how to deal with all the feelings around the grief, loss and pain. I was spiritually bereft, although I didn't know it then. All I knew was that I was depressed a lot of the time, and had this great big hole in my soul that I had to keep feeding so I wouldn't have to feel the pain or deal with anything in my life. But the truth was that no amount of food could relieve that constant ache, and all that happened was that I felt more and more fat, bloated and miserable. The food that was supposed to take away all the pain of living was really causing me more pain. When I came into program and heard the three letter word, God, I nearly ran away. I'm a very rational, logical person so it was really hard for me to believe what these crazy people were saying, but I was desperate enough to keep coming back. I had to act as if I did believe that I could recover and that a Higher Power might help me. When the miracles started to happen, my faith began to develop, and I slowly realized that my Higher Power was always with me. I now have a far better way to fill that hole in my soul, and it is a far more satisfying and saner way than filling it with mountains of food. One Day at a Time . . . I pray to keep my Higher Power in my heart and in my soul, because if I do, my life will be enriched immeasurably in ways that food could never do. ~ Sharon S.~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better. - Pg. 30 - More About Alcoholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Many people in meetings will talk about having a spiritual awakening or experience regarding recovery. These awakenings come in many forms, some in a flash of lightening, some in the slow revelation of sobriety. Whatever way it comes for you will be in your best interests. Help me accept whatever awakening is right for me, so that I am not wishing for the experience of another but content with my own. I Am Whole Today, I see that my life is up to me. How I choose to live, what I will accomplish, how I conduct my intimate relationships, how I treat myself, all are in my own hands. I am no longer afraid that pain and anxiety will return me to a state of helplessness and vulnerability. Let it come; I am ready to meet it head-on. I am strong in the awareness that I can live as I choose to live. I have been willing to walk a path of recovery that, though difficult, has built a strength in me and a knowledge that I can survive my most painful feelings. I do not need to be afraid of my life if I am not afraid of myself or an emotional death. I have met and tamed the monsters that live inside me. I am comfortable in my own skin. I am free to be who I am. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'When one door closes another door opens, but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the new worlds which open for us.' ~Alexander Graham Bell God wants for me what I would want for myself, IF I had all the facts. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you must talk about others, speak as though they were standing next to you. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am okay about me today and that is terrific. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Sober: Son Of A ***** Everything's Real. - Mickey B. |
December 2
Daily Reflections SERENITY Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, . . . TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 106 As I continued to go to meetings and work the Steps, something began to happen to me. I felt confused because I wasn't sure what it was that I was feeling, and then I realized I was experiencing serenity. It was a good feeling, but where had it come from? Then I realized it had come ". . .as the result of these steps." The program may not always be easy to practice, but I had to acknowledge that my serenity had come to me after working the Steps. As I work the Steps in everything I do, practicing these principles in all my affairs, now I find that I am awake to God, to others, and to myself. The spiritual awakening I have enjoyed as the result of working the Steps is the awareness that I am no longer alone. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The thoughts that come before having a slip seem to be partly subconscious. And yet it is likely that at least part of these thoughts get into our consciousness. An idle thought connected with drinking casually pops into our mind. That is the crucial moment. Will I harbor that thought even for one minute or will I banish it from my mind at once? If I let it stay, it may develop into a daydream. I may begin to see a cool glass of beer or a Manhattan cocktail in my mind's eye. If I allow the daydream to stay in my mind, it may lead to a decision, however unconscious, to take a drink. Then I am headed for a slip. Do I let myself daydream? Meditation For The Day Many of us have a sort of vision of the kind of person God wants us to be. We must be true to that vision, whatever it is, and we must try to live up to it, by living the way we believe we should live. We can all believe that God has a vision of what He wants us to be like. In all people there is a good person whom God sees in us, the person we could be and that God would like us to be. But many a person fails to fulfill that promise and God's disappointments must be many. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may strive to be the kind of a person that God would have me be. I pray that I may try to fulfill God's vision of what I could be. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Renew Your Effort, p. 68 "Though I know how hurt and sorry you must be after this slip, please do not worry about a temporary loss of your inner peace. As calmly as you can, just renew your effort in the A.A. program, especially those parts of it which have to do with meditation and self-analysis. "Could I also suggest that you look at excessive guilt for what it is? Nothing but a sort of reverse pride. A decent regret for what has happened is fine. But guilt--no. "Indeed, the slip could well have been brought about by unreasonable feelings of guilt because of other moral failures, so called. Surely, you ought to look into this possibility. Even here you should not blame yourself for failure; you can be penalized only for refusing to try for better things." Letter, 1958 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Bringing Projects to Completion. Fortitude Starting projects without completing them can be part of our alcoholic nature. It's related to immaturity and a tendency to become bored and discouraged quickly. The 12 Step program can help us overcome this problem. First, we realize and admit to such tendencies, fearlessly facing what has really been a very bad habit. Then we become honest about our motives. We realize that we didn't actually have the abiding interest that would have helped us complete some projects. In such cases, the projects never should have been started... and in the future we'll take are not to embark on similar projects. When something does need to be completed, the program will help us stay with it until it's done. We will always find that the satisfaction of completing a necessary project will be part of sober living. We'll also know that we're growing in the program. I'll take the necessary steps today to move any project toward completion. This will also help with future projects. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple ...we tried to carry this message to alcoholics...--Second part of Step 12. In this part of Step 12, we carry the message of hope. But it's not up to us if anyone accepts the message or not. This keeps us from playing God. We just gently deliver the message. We don't force the program down people's throats. In general, Step Twelve tells us, “Be helpful to those we can help.” When a neighbor is sick, mow her lawn. When a friend is in the hospital, visit him. Step Twelve reminds us that we make a difference. We have hope to give the world. And hope is what we stand for to the addict who still suffers. Hope is what we stand for to the addict's family. How beautiful to stand for hope! Remember when our lives stood for despair?? What a change! Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me shine brightly as a symbol of Your hope. Action for the Day: Today, I'll help someone in need. It may be an alcoholic or other drug addict, or just someone in need. I'll help make the world a better place. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The old woman I shall become will be quite different from the woman I am now. Another I is beginning . . . --George Sand Change is constant. And we are always becoming. Each chance, each feeling, each responsibility we commit ourselves to adds to the richness of our womanhood. We are not yesterday's woman, today. Our new awarenesses have brought us beyond her. And we can't go back without knowing, somehow, that she no longer meets the needs of today. We can look forward to our changes, to the older woman we are becoming. She will have the wisdom that we still lack. She will have learned to live and let live. She will have acquired, through years of experiences, a perspective that lends sanity to all situations. The lessons we are learning today, the pain that overwhelms us now and again, are nurturing the developing woman within each of us. If only we could accept the lessons and master them. If only we could trust the gift of change that accompanies the pain. I am becoming. And with the becoming, comes peace. I can sense it today. I know where I was yesterday. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION This thought brings us to Step Ten, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along. We vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past. We have entered the world of the Spirit. Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime. Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code. p. 84 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. Once, I was stopped because my truck was "weaving" while I was driving home from a friend's house, and they gave me a D.W.I. It meant a $300 fine and one year of probation, and I didn't think I would make it, so I decided to move back home. p. 481 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." The joy of living is the theme of A.A.'s Twelfth Step, and action is its key word. Here we turn outward toward our fellow alcoholics who are still in distress. Here we experience the kind of giving that asks no rewards. Here we begin to practice all Twelve Steps of the program in our daily lives so that we and those about us may find emotional sobriety. When the Twelfth Step is seen in its full implication, it is really talking about the kind of love that has no price tag on it. p. 106 ************************************************** ********* Destroying pride -- man becomes endearing; Destroying anger -- man gets rid of sorrow; Destroying desire -- man acquires peace; Destroying greed -- man achieves happiness. --Satya Sai Baba Whoever seeks God . . . has already found God. --unknown It's never too late to begin making an effort. --unknown When you find yourself rundown from life, pace yourself and take a refreshing break. --unknown BIG BOOK – Believing In God Beats Our Old Knowledge WILLING – When I Live Life, I Need God ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PROBLEMS "The certainties of one age are the problems of the next." -- R. H. Tawney Life is a process of change that inevitably produces problems; the fear of the new, the discomfort of old values being seen to be wrong, the confusion that so often accompanies growth. Problems are part of life and we can only escape them in death. (Even then nobody can be sure we will be free of problems!) As an alcoholic I tried to run away from my problems by drinking. But the next day the old problems were still there and my drinking had usually brought new problems. Alcohol only produced a momentary escape but reality always returned. Today, with the acceptance of my alcoholism and my decision not to "pick up the first drink", I face my problems. I deal with my problems. I live with the problems of life. Teach me to accept joyously the problems that life and growth inevitably bring. ************************************************** ********* "But blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear." Matthew 13:16 "Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.'" Hebrews 13:5 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Life will be so much easier if you can accept that things don't always go as planned and see that these are often magnificent opportunities. Lord, help me learn from the occurences of today that seem to go awry and show me how to make the situation better through my own flexibility and creativity. Enthusiasm keeps the mind young and the spirit growing. Lord, may I always see wonder in the ordinary happenings of my day. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Recovery: Our First Priority "We have to keep our recovery first and our priorities in order." Basic Text pg. 79 Before coming to NA, we used many excuses to justify our use of drugs: "He yelled at me" "She said this." "My partner left." "I got fired." We used these same excuses for not seeking help for our drug problem. We had to realize that these things kept happening because we kept using drugs. Only when we made recovery our first priority did these situations begin to change. We may be subject to the same tendency today, using excuses for not attending meetings and being of service. Our current excuses may be of a different nature: "I can't leave my kids." "My vacation wore me out." "I have to finish this project so I can impress my boss." But still, if we don't make recovery our first priority, chances are that we won't have to worry about these excuses anymore. Kids, vacations, and jobs probably won't be in our lives if we relapse. Our recovery must come first. Job or no job, relationship or no relationship, we have to attend meetings, work the steps, call our sponsor, and be of service to God and others. These simple actions are what make it possible for us to have vacations, families, and bosses to worry about. Recovery is the foundation of our lives, making everything else possible. Just for today: I will keep my priorities in order. Number One on the list is my recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. When one is a stranger to oneself, then one is estranged from others, too. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh There's a person inside each of us just itching to be known and loved. But if we don't get to know and love that person, how can we expect anyone else to know us? That's why it's so important to spend time alone getting acquainted with ourselves. And how do we do that? We can sit quietly with ourselves, thinking and listening. Then we can write our thoughts in a journal, or we can draw or paint them. If we play a musical instrument, we can put our thoughts and feelings into music. When we make the time and effort to know ourselves, it encourages others to want to know us, too. Since everything we do and feel begins inside us, we must feel good about ourselves in order to feel good about anything else. What wonders we are, that we have all the power we need to make our world a happy one! How do I feel about myself today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The management assumes no responsibility for what is found. --Abraham Maslow There are so many occasions when we would like to blame somebody--wife, child, parent, or "the management," for our feelings. When we get frustrated, overworked, or angry, we want somebody else to take responsibility. In truth, each of us has his own path and is responsible for his feelings. One man said that living alone made it clear to him that his wife wasn't creating his feelings. Until then he thought she was responsible. This blaming and not taking responsibility keep a man in the role of victim. When we accept the difficult message that our feelings are ours to deal with and no one else's, self-improvement begins. We begin to walk the difficult but self respecting path of spiritual awakening. We can do something about whatever hurts. Even in that awakening there are no guarantees that who we are will be totally what we want to find. Our only guarantee is that our Higher Power is with us to deal with the realities of our lives. Today, help me be responsible for what I feel and do. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. The old woman I shall become will be quite different from the woman I am now. Another I is beginning . . . --George Sand Change is constant. And we are always becoming. Each chance, each feeling, each responsibility we commit ourselves to adds to the richness of our womanhood. We are not yesterday's woman, today. Our new awarenesses have brought us beyond her. And we can't go back without knowing, somehow, that she no longer meets the needs of today. We can look forward to our changes, to the older woman we are becoming. She will have the wisdom that we still lack. She will have learned to live and let live. She will have acquired, through years of experiences, a perspective that lends sanity to all situations. The lessons we are learning today, the pain that overwhelms us now and again, are nurturing the developing woman within each of us. If only we could accept the lessons and master them. If only we could trust the gift of change that accompanies the pain. I am becoming. And with the becoming, comes peace. I can sense it today. I know where I was yesterday. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Putting Our Life on Hold We cannot afford to put our needs on hold, waiting for another person to fulfill us, make our life better, or come around and be who and what we want that person to be. That will create resentment, hostility, an unhealthy dependency, and a mess to deal with later on. If we have decided we want a particular relationship or want to wait about making a decision in a particular relationship, then we must go on with our own life in the interim. That can be hard. It can feel natural to put our life on hold. That is when we get caught up in the codependent beliefs: That person can make me happy... I need that particular person to do a particular thing in order to be happy.... That's a circumstance that can hook our low self-esteem, our self-doubt, and our tendency to neglect ourselves. We can get into this situation in a number of ways. We can do this waiting for a letter, waiting for a job, waiting for a person, waiting for an event. We do not have to put our life on hold. There will be repercussions from doing this. Go on with your life. Take life a day at a time. What is something I could be doing now to take care of myself, make myself feel better, get my needs met in an appropriate, healthy way? How can I own my power to take care of myself, despite what the other person is or isn't doing? What will happen if I break the system and begin taking care of myself? Sometimes, we get the answer we want immediately. Sometimes, we wait for a while. Sometimes, things don't work out exactly the way we hoped. But they always work out for good, and often better than we expected. And in the meantime, we have manifested love for ourselves by living our own life and taking the control away from others. That always comes back to us tenfold, because when we actually manifest love for ourselves, we give our Higher Power, other people, and the Universe permission to send us the love we want and need. Stopping living our life to make a thing happen doesn't work. All it does is make us miserable, because we have stopped living our life. Today, I will force myself, if necessary, to live my own life. I will act in my own best interest, in a way that reflects self-love. If I have given power or control of my life to someone other than myself, and someone besides a Power greater than myself, I will take it back. I will begin acting in my own best interests, even if it feels awkward to do that. No matter what is going on in my life today, I can always find something for which to be grateful. When I stop and think about this and make a gratitude list, there is no room for depression or self pity. There is so much to be grateful for today. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Learn to Visualize Your Path Learn to visualize what you would like to see happen in your life. Use your mind and your imagination, in connection with your heart, to create a picture of the future. Visions can help create our future and guide us down the path. If we have a picture of where we’re going, it will help us know when we get there. It will help us know we’re on track. At times, we find ourselves easily using our imaginations to create a clear picture. We can see ourselves doing something a particular way, comfortably functioning in a particular situation. We can see how what we’re working on is going to look. We can see ourselves living in a particular place, working at a particular job, or vacationing at that special spot. We know clearly what we want. Other times, our vision may not be as clear. We may have only a few vague ideas about how a thing or place will look. We need to focus our attention and create as clear a picture as we can. Making a list of all we know about what we’d like it to be helps here. Other times, we may be completely in the dark without a clue about where we’re going. That doesn’t mean we can’t get there or that there is no place for us to go. It means that we need to ask God, the universe, to help us become clear on what would be good, clear enough so we can recognize the answer when it comes. Learn to use your imagination to create the life you want. Take time at the beginning to develop a vision, an idea about what you want. Visualize how you would like things to be. Then let your vision guide you where you need to go. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go The lesson is joy I was visiting a counselor in Minnesota one cold January day in 1991. We were talking about the present and speculating about the lessons to come. She grabbed my hand and looked at me, looked right into my eyes. “This I know for sure,” she said. “You’ve been through enough pain. Now you’re going to learn about joy.” One week later, my son Shane died. Mixed in with my grief was rage. I was so angry with her for saying that. It was another instance of getting my hopes up that I could finally be happy. Now, I felt tricked and let down. The years passed slowly. I lost almost everything, including my desire to write. Nichole graduated from high school. Then she moved out of the house, and to New York. Life kept changing and moving along, in spite of how I felt. One year I noticed that the anniversary of Shane’s death had passed, and I hadn’t become depressed. Then I began to notice something else. I was beginning to feel alive, vibrant, awestruck with life. It wasn’t a naive assumption that whatever I wanted, I’d get. It was a newfound ability to surrender to each moment and enjoy what life brought my way. I made new friends. My relationships with old friends changed. What inspired me was my new relationship with life. I stopped looking for outward circumstances to provide me with happiness. I began to see that I held that key myself. If you’re going through something in your life that isn’t what you planned, a transformation is at hand. While we might prefer to be transformed in the twinkling of an eye, it usually doesn’t happen that fast. It takes all the moments added together, and sometimes those moments go on and on. But one day when you least expect it– a phoenix rises from the ashes. That phoenix is you. Some of us encounter a lot of pain. Some of us have less. If I could sit across from you right now, I’d look into your eyes and say these words to you: “I know you’ve been through a lot. But there’s a new cycle coming. You’re going to learn about joy.” Life is going to take you on your own journey of personal transformation. You may have let go of some things. But don’t worry, you’ll get some of those things back. And sometimes when we think something is lost, it’s not. It’s just moved to a different place. No pain, no gain, is what many people say. And usually they say that because when the lesson is learned, the pain stops. But then something happens. It just clicks in. The moments start getting better and better. And it’s not because of what we get. It happens because we’ve surrendered. And although it looks like what we’ve surrendered to is pain and heartache, we’ve really surrendered to God’s will. There’s a world out there– right outside your door. And the key that opens the door is in your hand. The ultimate lesson is learning joy. Put your fears aside. Live your life, whatever that means to you today. It may happen today, tomorrow, next week, or in ten years. but you won’t be able to help yourself. You’ll throw your hat up in the air, look around, and shout, “Oh my God, how sweet life is.” God, help me get through my lessons, one by one. Then bring me to that place where I learn about joy. *************************************** Choosing Not To Be a Target Emotional Attacks Hurtful confrontations often leave us feeling drained and confused. When someone attacks us emotionally, we may wonder what we did to rouse their anger, and we take their actions personally. We may ask ourselves what we could have done to compel them to behave or speak that way toward us. It’s important to remember that there are no real targets in an emotional attack and that it is usually a way for the attacker to redirect their uncomfortable feelings away from themselves. When people are overcome by strong emotions, like hurt or anguish, they may see themselves as victims and lash out at others as a means of protection or to make themselves feel better. You may be able to shield yourself from an emotional attack by not taking the behavior personally. First, however, it is good to cultivate a state of detachment that can provide you with some protection from the person who is attacking you. This will allow you to feel compassion for this person and remember that their beha! vior isn’t as much about you as it is about their need to vent their emotions. If you have difficulty remaining unaffected by someone’s behavior, take a moment to breathe deeply and remind yourself that you didn’t do anything wrong, and you aren’t responsible for people’s feelings. If you can see that this person is indirectly expressing a need to you—whether they are reaching out for help or wanting to be heard—you may be able to diffuse the attack by getting them to talk about what is really bothering them. You cannot control other people’s emotions, but you can control your own. If you sense yourself responding to their negativity, try not to let yourself. Keep your heart open to them, and they may let go of their defensiveness and yield to your compassion and openness. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Once at a meeting held in a church, I saw a stained glass window on which was written, “God Is Love.” For some reason, my mind transposed the words into “Love Is God.” Either way is correct and true, I realized, looking about me and becoming even more conscious of the spirit of love and Power in the small meeting room. I’ll continue to seek out that love and Power, following The Program as if my life depended upon it — as indeed it does. Does life to me today mean living — in the active sense — joyously and comfortably? Today I Pray May I feel the spirit of love that gives our prayers their energy. May I feel the oneness in this room, the concentration of love that gives the group its power. May I feel the exemplary love of a Higher Power, which our love echoes. Today I Will Remember Love Is God. *************************************** One More Day Habituation is a falling asleep or fatiguing of the sense of time; which explains why young years pass slowly, while later life finds itself faster and faster upon its course. –Thomas Mann Our routines can become so rote that we’re unaware of making choices. Suddenly, we realize we haven’t done many of the things which matter most to us. With this realization comes another: sometimes making no choice is, in fact a choice in the same things, saying the same words, living a copy of the day before – we have chosen to live safely. But we may think, I wish I had… We don’t have to completely change our lives in order to make better choices for ourselves. All we have to do is see all the choices open to us. What and how I choose makes every day different from the last. ***************************************** One Day At A Time FAITH I try to avoid looking forward or backward, and try to keep looking upward. Charlotte Bronte If only I would remember to keep my focus on God and today, not yesterday and not tomorrow. The past is just that ... the past. I can't change any of it, the good memories or the bad. They are just memories. I don't have to forget my past; I just have to stop hurting myself by constantly agonizing over what I consider mistakes and failures. Tomorrow is in God's hands. What better place for it to be! I have to learn to trust God to hold me in the palm of His hands, the same way He holds tomorrow. He isn't going to drop me or close His fist around me so tightly that I can't breathe. We are all created with the ability to make choices, and He gives us that freedom. He will hold us securely, and help us make the right choices, if only we let go and let Him. One day at a time . . . I will forget yesterday and tomorrow. I will not look backward or forward. I will look up and put myself in God's care, knowing He will hold me safely in the palm of His hand. Debbie K. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The man in the bed was told of the acute poisoning from which he suffered, how it deteriorates the body of an alcoholic and warps his mind. There was much talk about the mental state preceding the first drink. - Pg. 157 - A Vision For You Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We always wanted our image to be so good, yet we always seemed to come off bad. No amount of mind-affecting chemicals ever made us come off good, either. They just made us think we were OK. But there is nothing so bad right now, that a fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort won't make it worse. May I clearly see that drugs only provided an illusion of good time, not the real thing. Hesitation Today, I will walk the walk and talk the talk. It will not be good for me, ultimately, to half commit myself. In a way, the particular path that I take is less significant than that I take a path. I can second-guess myself and my experience. Commitment to a path is really commitment to myself. I am allowing myself to take a clear direction, one in which I can actualize my talents on a day-to-day basis, one that will allow me to build a foundation and a structure in which I can live. I will have a passion in life, a passion that takes me beyond myself, a passion to love, nourish, be led and challenged by. I will follow it, and it will follow me. I deserve a passion in my life. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote There are a lot more reasons for working the Ninth Step than freedom, serenity, and moral responsibility. Making amends is a good way of having the last word. I take my program seriously and myself lightly. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Thinking about what you'll say before you share, or what you should have said after you share means you missed the meeting. Time for Joy - Book - Quote No matter what is going on in my life today, I can always find something for which to be grateful. When I stop and think about this and make a gratitude list, there is no room for depression or self pity. There is so much to be grateful for today. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I know if I take a drink, I'm gone. It's going to just keep feeding itself. But I secretly suspected that everybody who drinks must surely get that same fired-up feeling and want more, but because they don't have a problem with it they can control it. But in the AA Big Book Dr. Silkworth says that's not true; non alcoholics never experience that phenomenon of craving. - Bob D. |
December 3
Daily Reflections IN ALL OUR AFFAIRS . . . . we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 106 I find that carrying the message of recovery to other alcoholics is easy because it helps me to stay sober and it provides me with a sense of well-being about my own recovery. The hard part is practicing these principles in all my affairs. It is important that I share the benefits I receive from A.A., especially at home. Doesn't my family deserve the same patience, tolerance and understanding I so readily give to the alcoholic? When reviewing my day I try to ask, "Did I have a chance to be a friend today and miss it?" " Did I have a chance to rise above a nasty situation and avoid it?" "Did I have a chance to say 'I'm sorry,' and refuse to?" Just as I ask God for help with my alcoholism each day, I ask for help in extending my recovery to include all situations and all people! ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day There is some alcoholic thought, conscious or unconscious, that comes before every slip. As long as we live, we must be on the lookout for such thoughts and guard against them. In fact, our A.A. training is mostly to prepare us, to make us ready to recognize such thoughts at once and to reject them at once. The slip comes when we allow such thoughts to remain in our minds, even before we go through the motions of lifting the glass to our lips. The A.A. program is largely one of mental training. How well is my mind prepared? Meditation For The Day Fret not your mind with puzzles you cannot solve. The solutions may never be shown to you until you have left this life. The loss of dear ones, the inequality of life, the deformed and the maimed, and many other puzzling things may not be known to you until you reach the life beyond. "I have yet many things to say unto you, but ye cannot hear them now." Only step by step, stage by stage, can you proceed in your journey into greater knowledge and understanding. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be content that things which I now see darkly will some day be made clear. I pray that I may have faith that someday I will see face to face. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The "Slipper" Needs Understanding, p. 99 "Slips can often be charged to rebellion; some of us are more rebellious than others. Slips may be due to the illusion that one can be 'cured' of alcoholism. Slips can also be charged to carelessness and complacency. Many of us fail to ride out these periods sober. Things go fine for two or three years--then the member is seen no more. Some of us suffer extreme guilt because of vices or practices that we can't or won't let go of. Too little self-forgiveness and too little prayer--well, this combination adds up to slips. "Then some of us are far more alcohol-damaged than others. Still others encounter a series of calamities and cannot seem to find the spiritual resources to meet them. There are those of us who are physically ill. Others are subject to more or less continuous exhaustion, anxiety, and depression. These conditions often play a part in slips--sometimes they are utterly controlling." Talk, 1960 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Raising the frustration threshold Achievement What happens when we hit snags in our lives? In drinking, it was a common practice to chuck everything and just get drunk. This always made things worse, sometimes so much so that we forgot about the problem that triggered our frustrations. Dealing with frustration is another part of growing up emotionally. Self-understanding in sobriety will help us detect surges of anger and irritation when things aren't going as planned. We'll recognize these feelings as being the same emotions that plagued us in our drinking days. In sobriety, however, we are given choices. We actually do have the choice of pausing, letting the anger drain away, and then taking charge of the situation by knowing that God is working along with us. By doing this, we can eventually raise our threshold of frustration. If some task or issue makes me angry today, I'll back off and place the outcome in God's hands. I'll know this is working when I have a change in feeling about it. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple And to practice these principles in all our affairs. Third part of Step Twelve. This is a statement about us. We are now people of values. These values reflect our spiritual growth. We know how to help others. We know how to admit our wrongs. We know how to look at ourselves and change our defects. We know how to live an honest life. Step Twelve tells us. "Go use these tools for better living. Go be all you can be. Enjoy life and live a life you can be proud of." Step Twelve also tells us about how to have loving relationships. By the time we complete Step Twelve, we make or regain many relationships. The most important one is with our Higher Power. As we grow in the program, we realize all our relationships are spiritual gifts. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I now have one face instead of many masks. Help me be a person who will stand before You with pride, not shame. Action for the Day: Today, I'll talk with a friend and talk about my new values. I will talk about how much my life has changed. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Sometimes, sisters have the same journey in their hearts. One may help the other or betray her. Will they cross over? Will the ship sail without them? --Louise Bernikow Other women share our struggle. When we treat our women friends as sisters and fellow pilgrims, we find great joy in our mutual help. We pray for the wisdom to let go our feelings of insecurity and rivalry with other women. Rivalry is not good for us. It leads us to forget our own unique qualities. We each are the best person in the world at one thing: being ourselves. When we compete, we need to retain a balanced perspective and to think well of ourselves whether we win or lose. We run the best race we can; therefore, let us not regard other women as rivals. They are our sisters, and they, too, are doing the best they can. Today, I will pray for the serenity that will let me see when my sisters have the same journey in their hearts as I. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone--even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality--safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition. pp. 84-85 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. I spent three months on unemployment, which to me meant three months of partying. When the money ran out, I looked for a job. Even though my California union card meant nothing, I got a job as a foreman back with my first employer. I look back on that now and I think, was God good to me, or what? And I was blaming God all this time for my troubles. p. 481 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Our Twelfth Step also says that as a result of practicing all the Steps, we have each found something called a spiritual awakening. To new A.A.'s, this often seems like a very dubious and improbable state of affairs. "What do you mean when you talk about a `spiritual awakening'?" they ask. p. 106 ************************************************** ********* Joy increases as you give it, and diminishes as you try to keep it for yourself. In giving it, you will accumulate a deposit of joy greater than you ever believed possible. --Norman Vincent Peale A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner. --English Proverb "History has demonstrated that the most notable winners usually encountered heartbreaking obstacles before they triumphed. They won because they refused to become discouraged by their defeats." --B. C. Forbes "Spend unbroken chunks of time with the most important people in your life." --Brian Tracy "Forget past mistakes. Forget failures. Forget everything except what you're going to do now and do it." --William Durant ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation WONDER "Wonder rather than doubt is the root of knowledge." -- Abraham Heschel Living with paradox is part of my sobriety. Things are never quite what they seem. When I think I have something figured out, I am made to be confused again especially around my life, relationships, people, events and the universe. Life is both simple and incomprehensible. God seems to demand an agnostic faith! There is so much I do not know or understand. But all of this leads to a creative and exciting sobriety. It makes life an adventure. It feeds that artistic part of me that is reborn in my sobriety. Things I used to dislike when I drank, I now enjoy. People and writers that once bored me now fascinate me; even modern art has a spiritual message! O God, let the feelings of amazement always be a part of my faith. ************************************************** ********* "For you were formerly darkness, but now you are light in the Lord; walk as children of light." Ephesians 5:8 "Wherefore, accept one another, just as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God." Romans 15:7 "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16 "God has given gifts to each of you from His great variety of spiritual gifts. Manage them well so that God's generosity can flow through you." 1 Peter 4:10 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Allow your mind to become quiet and less judgmental and you will feel improvements in all areas of your life. Lord, help my mind avoid twisting the words I hear and misjudging the intentions of others in order to justify my own righteousness. Help me to spread Your peace. There is not one moment that we are separated from God's care unless we choose to be. Lord, You provide for my daily needs and deliver me from evil. You are my refuge. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Vision Without Limits "Perhaps for the first time, we see a vision of our new life." Basic Text pg. 34 In our addiction, our vision of ourselves was very limited. Each day, we went through the same routine: getting, using, and finding ways and means to get more. And that's all we could reasonably expect for the duration of our lives. Our potential was limited. Today, our prospects are changed. Recovery has given us a new vision of ourselves and our lives. We are no longer trapped in the endlessly gray routine of addiction. We are free to stretch ourselves in new ways, trying out new ideas and new activities. In doing so, we come to see ourselves in a new way. Our potential is limited only by the strength of the Higher Power that cares for us - and that strength has no limits. In recovery, life and everything in it appears open to us. Guided by our spiritual principles, driven by the power given us by the God of our understanding, our horizons are limitless. Just for today: I will open my eyes to the possibilities before me. My potential is as limitless and as powerful as the God of my understanding. Today, I will act on that potential. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I wonder if the snow loves the trees and fields that it kisses them so gently. --Lewis Carroll In different times and places, clouds can produce snowflakes, raindrops, or even hailstones. Each one seems to have its own purpose and mood as it falls from the sky. The snowflake is the lightest of these, and so it falls slowly and softly. Rainfall can be soft or hard. It sometimes feels angry, almost cleansing. No matter how thick the snowfall is, it is still soft. We can rarely hear it land. It covers the world in a peaceful white. If we look closely, we can see that each small snowflake is unique. Like the snowflakes, each of us has a unique design. Perhaps what we can learn from the snowflakes is how to gently touch the lives and growing things around us. Times of anger and rain are necessary, but a soft snowfall brings peace to all humanity. How can I show my gentle side today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Sometimes I go about pitying myself, and all the time I am being carried, on great winds across the sky. --Ojibway "Ah, poor me," we sometimes say, "I have to work so hard!" "I have so much stress!" "If only my problem with money would get better, then I could be content!" "I just don't understand women!" "Why can't my family have fewer troubles?" This attitude of self-pity is as ancient as humanity. The Ojibway recognized blindness to the spiritual path. Every man has problems and challenges, and life often is not fair. Self-pity becomes a stumbling block when we get so narrowly focused upon our problems. We forget we are a part of a whole throng of fellow pilgrims on this path. It helps to notice others beside ourselves who are seeking courage to live their lives. Sometimes we reawaken our awareness of our Higher Power by seeing that we are "carried on great winds across the sky." We have many blessings; we are not alone. Often within problems we discover our greatest blessings. God, help me find the spiritual path in the choices I make today. Help me turn away from self-pity. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Sometimes, sisters have the same journey in their hearts. One may help the other or betray her. Will they cross over? Will the ship sail without them? --Louise Bernikow Other women share our struggle. When we treat our women friends as sisters and fellow pilgrims, we find great joy in our mutual help. We pray for the wisdom to let go our feelings of insecurity and rivalry with other women. Rivalry is not good for us. It leads us to forget our own unique qualities. We each are the best person in the world at one thing: being ourselves. When we compete, we need to retain a balanced perspective and to think well of ourselves whether we win or lose. We run the best race we can; therefore, let us not regard other women as rivals. They are our sisters, and they, too, are doing the best they can. Today, I will pray for the serenity that will let me see when my sisters have the same journey in their hearts as I. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Developing Healthy Tolerance Many of us are skilled at denying and discounting what hurts us. We may endure a particular situation, telling ourselves repeatedly it's not that bad; we shouldn't be so demanding; it'll change any day; we should be able to live with it; it doesn't annoy us; the other person didn't really mean it; it doesn't hurt; maybe it's just us. We may fight and argue with ourselves about the reality and validity of our pain - our right to feel it and do something about it. Often we will tolerate too much or so much that we become furious and refuse to tolerate any more. We can learn to develop healthy tolerance. We do that by setting healthy boundaries and trusting ourselves to own our power with people. We can lessen our pain and suffering by validating and paying attention to ourselves. We can work at shortening the time between identifying a need to set a boundary, and taking clear, direct action. We aren't crazy. Some behaviors really do bug us. Some behaviors really are inappropriate, annoying, hurtful, or abusive. We don't have to feel guilty about taking care of ourselves once we identify a boundary that needs to be set. Look at the experience as an experiment in owning our power, in establishing new, healthy boundaries and limits for ourselves. We don't have to feel guilty or apologize or explain ourselves after we've set a boundary. We can learn to accept the awkwardness and discomfort of setting boundaries with people. We can establish our rights to have these limits. We can give the other person room to have and explore his or her feelings; we can give ourselves room to have our feelings - as we struggle to own our power and create good, working relationships. Once we can trust our ability to take care of ourselves, we will develop healthy reasonable tolerance of others. God, help me begin striving for healthy boundaries and healthy tolerance for others and myself. I am beginning to trust myself today. There is a place deep within me that tells me that I am okay and guides me along my path in recovery. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Let Go of Leftover Guilt Why do you feel guilty when you’re doing what you’ve been led to do? That nagging, gnawing feeling of guilt is leftovers– leftovers from another period when we didn’t love ourselves. It’s left over from another time when we didn’t trust ourselves. Left over from another place when we didn’t know life could be fun, easy, natural, and joy could be ours. Feeling guilty and anxious about that new thing you’re doing, that new place you’re going, that new adventure you’re on is part of your resistance to the lesson. Part of your shying back from the idea that you can truly, absolutely, and fundamentally love yourself and enjoy all parts of your life. Soon you will see that you’ve been led to the very place you’re at right now. The very thing you are feeling guilty and anxious about is the very thing you’ve been led to do to take you on your next adventure. Life is abundant. We can bask in self-love and the healing resources around us. Our movements, our activities, our days and hours and nights can flow easily. Naturally. And we can do the things we’re led to do without feeling guilty. Recognize the guilt and anxiety of resistance as just that: resistance. Then let yourself go on your journey of love without spoiling it with guilt. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Enjoy the void We begin to walk down a path– recovery, a new job, a new relationship. We’re busy, even overwhelmed, with everything that lies before us. We work and work and walk our path and grow. Then one day the relationship changes. The job changes. Or we’re far anough along to look past the next minute of sobriety and when we look, we can’t see anything. We get scared. Nothingness can be frightening. There’s no way to plan for the future. We can’t make the right move. We’re surrounded with decisions, and none of them feel like the right ones. Relax. Savor this moment,too. Stop trying to fill it up. You’re in the void, that magical place from which all creation arises. Breathe the air, look at the flowers, feel the sun. Or build a fire to keep you warm. There’s no need to be frightened of this place; there’s nothing you need to do. Keep walking your path, and the creative way will become clear to you soon. God, help me to let go of worry when I’m in the in-between places in my life. Help me to walk in peace and let the universe show me the path that I am to follow. Help me relax in this space and garner energy for the journey ahead. *************************************** Relating to the Negative The Danger of Repression by Madisyn Taylor When negative thoughts arise it is best to address them rather than pushing them down where they will surface again. For the last several years, there has been a lot of focus on the power of positive thinking. Many people have come to misinterpret this wisdom to mean that it is not okay to have a bad mood or a negative thought or feeling. This can lend a kind of superficiality to their relationship with life and relationships with other people. It can also lead them to feel that if a negative thought or feeling comes up, in themselves or someone else, they must immediately block it out. When they do this, they are engaging in the act of repressing a part of themselves that needs to seen, heard, and processed. When we repress parts of ourselves, they don’t go away so much as they get buried deep within us, and they often come out when we least expect it. On the other hand, if we allow ourselves to be fully human, honoring all the thoughts, feelings, and moods that pass through us on a given day, we create a more conscious relationship with ourselves. Instead of blocking out thoughts and feelings that we label as negative, we can simply observe them and then let them go. They only get stuck when we react to them negatively, pushing them down and out of sight where they get lodged in our unconscious minds. A healthier solution might be to develop a practice of following any negative thought we may have with a positive thought. This works well because positive thoughts are many times more powerful than negative thoughts. Rather than setting our minds up in such a way that we become fearful of the contents of our own consciousness, blocking out anything that is less than 100 percent positive, we might resolve to develop a friendlier attitude toward ourselves, trusting in our inherent goodness. When we recognize our true inner worth, a few dark clouds passing through our minds will not intimidate us. We will see them for what they are—small, dark figures passing through an expansive sky of well-being and truth. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Our ancient enemy, self-will, wears a mask, confronting me with this sort of rationalization: “Why do I have to lean on God? Hasn’t He already given me the intelligence to think for myself?” I have to pause when such thoughts creep into my mind, remembering that I’ve never really been able to bring about the results I wanted simply by relying on my own devices. I’m not self-sufficient, nor do I know all the answers; bitter experience alone teaches me that. Do I know that I need God’s guidance? Am I willing to accept it? Today I Pray I pray that, as I become stronger in my conviction and in my sobriety, I will not begin to shrug off my dependence on a Higher Power. May I continue to pray for guidance, even when things seem to be going along smoothly. May I know that I need my Higher Power as much in times of triumph as in times of trauma. Today I Will Remember Self-sufficiency is a godless myth. *************************************** One More Day Happiness is not being pained in body nor troubled in mind. -Thomas Jefferson Teenagers say it all the time: “Hey! Mellow Out! Hype down!” These words may be alien to us, but we can listen to these somewhat flippant admonitions. Perhaps we do get too tense at times during certain phases of our lives. Pain, anxiety, or stress can cause us to tighten our muscles, to brace our bodies against the impact of our medical problems. The tighter our bodies become, the less patient and kind we are to those we love. To help ourselves “mellow out” we first have to identify the feelings associated with tenseness. We can calm down by taking deep, slow, cleansing breaths. Let’s do ourselves a favor and learn to relax, to mellow out. By learning to let my body rest and relax, I can concentrate on keeping my mind free and untroubled. ***************************************** One Day At A Time INTUITION Don't listen to friends when the Friend inside you says, "Do this!" Mahatma Gandhi The Oxford dictionary describes intuition as "immediate apprehension by the mind without reasoning." Well, I certainly never acted on intuition for most of my life because, in order for me to make any decision, it had to be based on cold hard logic. I would literally make a scientific "if - then hypothesis" based on all the possible consequences of any action I was contemplating, and by the time I'd looked into all the possible negative outcomes, I'd more than likely have talked myself out of it. Part of the problem was fear that if it didn't turn out well, I would not be taken care of. How could I trust that my Higher Power would take care of me, seeing I had for a long time been angry at God and believed that He was definitely not there for me? One of the miracles of the program has been my returning belief in a Higher Power who is always there for me when I need Him. I am slowly learning that I just need to turn my will and my life over to Him on a daily basis as it tells me in Step Three, and amazing things are beginning to happen. Because I wasn't able to do this for many years, I had blocked my intuition, which we are told is the way in which we are in direct contact with our Higher Power. Slowly, the intuitive thoughts are returning as I work on a daily relationship with my Higher Power, and I am now more able to act on them, knowing that I will always be taken care of. One Day at a Time . . . I will continue to turn my will and my life over to my Higher Power knowing that my connection with Him, my intuition, is getting stronger each day, and that I am more able to do God's will for today. ~ Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote For most normal folks, drinking means conviviality, companionship and colorful imagination. It means release from care, boredom and worry. It is joyous intimacy with friends and a feeling that life is good. But not so with us in those last days of heavy drinking. - Pg. 151 - A Vision For You Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Nothing comes easy for us right now. A lot of energy goes into just staying put and accepting this new way of life. We say that when the going gets tough, we hang tough! We know that it will pass, we make that promise to you. But it will be in God's time, not yours. Let me believe in myself, in this program, and in You, my Spiritual Source. A Little Magic Each day is a gift especially for me. I will look through innocent eyes at the world today and see the gifts that are meant just for me. Children think the sun rises for and because of them. They're sure that the moon hangs in the sky because they waved their arm towards the heavens. That flowers bloom for their eyes alone to see. They are magical thinkers. They take delight in the antics of a squirrel, in a balloon sailing in a bright, blue sky. They see the world fresh, in color and alive each new day, each new moment. They are constantly being surprised. Today, I think I'll borrow a little of their magic. Their magic and my maturity may just be a winning combination. I believe anything is possible - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Some days you will be shocked at how nasty and short tempered you are. You'll think, 'This can't be me being so unreasonable.' Yet it is. You may deny it's really you by jostling the blame on another, 'If they hadn't....'. No, your bad behavior is your fault. You have no excuse. Now, can you love you anyway? I learn to love me even when I don't like me. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book On the first drink: When you get hit by a train, which kills you, the engine or the caboose? Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am beginning to trust myself today. There is a place deep within me that tells me that I am okay and guides me along my path in recovery. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote It's fine to drink like a fish. If you drink what fish drink. - Jim M. |
December 4
Daily Reflections INTO ACTION A.A. is more than a set of principles; it is a society of alcoholics in action. We must carry the message, else we ourselves can wither and those who haven't been given the truth may die. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 13 I desperately wanted to live, but if I was to succeed, I had to become active in our God-given program. I joined what became my group, where I opened the hall, made coffee, and cleaned up. I had been sober about three months when an oldtimer told me I was doing Twelfth-Step work. What a satisfying realization that was! I felt I was really accomplishing something. God had given me a second chance, A.A. had shown me the way, and these gifts were not only free - they were also priceless! Now the joy of seeing newcomers grow reminds me of where I have come from, where I am now, and the limitless possibilities that lie ahead. I need to attend meetings because they recharge my batteries so that I have light when it's needed. I'm still a beginner in service work, but already I am receiving more than I'm giving. I can't keep it unless I give it away. I am responsible when another reaches out for help. I want to be there - sober. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day If we allow an alcoholic thought to lodge in our minds for any length of time, we are in danger of having a slip. Therefore we must dispel such thoughts at once, by refusing their admittance and by immediately putting constructive thoughts in their place. Remember that alcohol is poison to you. Remember that it is impossible for you to drink normally. Remember that one drink will lead to another and you will eventually be drunk. Remember what happened to you in the past as a result of your drinking. Think of every reason you have learned in A.A. for not taking that drink. Fill your mind with constructive thoughts. Am I keeping my thoughts constructive? Meditation For The Day Always seek to set aside the valuations of the world which seem wrong and try to judge only by those valuations which seem right to you. Do not seek too much the praise and notice of men. Be one of those who, though sometimes scoffed at, have a serenity and peace of mind which the scoffers never know. Be one of that band who feel the Divine Principle in the universe, though He be often rejected by men because He cannot be seen. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not heed too much the judgment of men. I pray that I may test things by what seems right to me. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Those Other People, p.268 "Just like you, I have often thought myself the victim of what other people say and do. Yet every time I confessed the sins of such people, especially those whose sins did not correspond exactly with my own, I found that I only increased the total damage. My own resentment, my self-pity would often render me well-nigh useless to anybody. "So, nowadays, if anyone talks of me so as to hurt, I first ask myself if there is any truth at all in what they say. If there is none, I try to remember that I too have had my periods of speaking bitterly of others; that hurtful gossip is but a symptom of our remaining emotional illness; and consequently that I must never be angry at the unreasonableness of sick people. "Under very trying conditions I have had, again and again, to forgive others--also myself. Have you recently tried this?" Letter, 1946 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The Lure of Greener Pastures Gratitude One of our old-timers spent a great deal of time trying to find a new job but never succeeding. When he finally retired, on a good pension, it became clear that the job he had kept was probably better and provided more benefits than any job he had been seeking. He was fortunate that none of his proposed job searches ever worked out. The fantasy of finding "greener pastures" is something many of us face, in both drinking and sobriety. We may be very well off where we are, yet feel that something rich and exciting is over in the next meadow. We can feel this way about our jobs, our lifestyles, and our locations. The answer to this greener-pastures obsession is to feel more gratitude for what we have here and now. We might also focus more upon today's activities and less upon impossible dreams of other places. There may be greener pastures somewhere, but I'll first look for the opportunities and benefits of my own life and surroundings. I may be richly blessed without knowing it. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple And to practice these principles in all our affairs. Third part of Step Twelve. This is a statement about us. We are now people of values. These values reflect our spiritual growth. We know how to help others. We know how to admit our wrongs. We know how to look at ourselves and change our defects. We know how to live an honest life. Step Twelve tells us. "Go use these tools for better living. Go be all you can be. Enjoy life and live a life you can be proud of." Step Twelve also tells us about how to have loving relationships. By the time we complete Step Twelve, we make or regain many relationships. The most important one is with our Higher Power. As we grow in the program, we realize all our relationships are spiritual gifts. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I now have one face instead of many masks. Help me be a person who will stand before You with pride, not shame. Action for the Day: Today, I'll talk with a friend and talk about my new values. I will talk about how much my life has changed. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning I want to feel myself part of things, of the great drift and swirl; not cut off, missing things, like being sent to bed early as a child. --Joanna Field Feeling apart from the action and always looking on; wanting attention, and yet afraid of being noticed; no doubt these are familiar memories to most of us. We may still struggle with our self-perception, but we can celebrate that we no longer drown our moods. Connecting with the people next to us, though difficult, is no longer impossible when we rely on the program. There is a way to be a part of the action, a way that never fails. It takes only a small effort, really. We can simply look, with love, at someone nearby today and extend our hearts in honest attention. When we make someone else feel special, we'll become special too. Recovery can help each of us move beyond the boundaries of our own ego. Trusting that our lives are in the loving care of God, however we understand God, relieves us of the need for self-centeredness. We can let go of ourselves now that God is in charge, and we'll discover that we have joined the action. I will open my heart, and I'll be joined to all that's around me. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. “How can I best serve Thee--Thy will (not mine) be done.” These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will. p. 85 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. Since it was my first job in some three months, I celebrated, staying drunk. I would go to the job site and get the workers set up, then take off to drink. This lasted until the day I told off the owner of a company we were working for, and I got fired. That job put me on the union hiring list, however, and I got good jobs, with good companies. I began to try to get sober. Sometimes I could last a week or two. Then I would get drunk again. I was seeing the kids a lot then. I moved into an apartment behind my wife's house, sharing it with my father-in-law. My daughters were married by then, and my sons were in junior high school. I wasn't included in family events, but I was there. pp. 481-482 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Maybe there are as many definitions of spiritual awakening as there are people who have had them. But certainly each genuine one has something in common with all the others. And these things which they have in common are not too hard to understand. When a man or a woman has a spiritual awakening, the most important meaning of it is that he has now become able to do, feel, and believe that which he could not do before on his unaided strength and resources alone. He has been granted a gift which amounts to a new state of consciousness and being. He has been set on a path which tells him he is really going somewhere, that life is not a dead end, not something to be endured or mastered. In a very real sense he has been transformed, because he has laid hold of a source of strength which, in one way or another, he had hitherto denied himself. He finds himself in possession of a degree of honesty, tolerance, unselfishness, peace of mind, and love of which he had thought himself quite incapable. What he has received is a free gift, and yet usually, at least in some small part, he has made himself ready to receive it. pp. 106-107 ************************************************** ********* Gratitude is one of the sweet shortcuts to finding peace of mind and happiness inside. No matter what's going on outside of us, there's always something we could be grateful for. --Barry Neil Kaufman If we wait for perfection before enjoying life, we will never enjoy life. --unknown One moment of patience may ward off a great disaster; one moment of impatience may ruin a whole life. --Chinese proverb I am getting to know myself today. I accept who I am today. I like myself today. --Ruth Fishel The Lord will drench you with His showers, but He will dry you with His sun. --Czech Proverb "Good morning, This is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today." We win half the battle when we make up our minds to take the world as we find it, including the thorns. --unknown Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly! --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PREJUDICE "Everyone is a prisoner of his own experiences. No one can eliminate prejudices just recognize --them." Edward R. Murrow In recovery I am accepting that I am not perfect and some prejudices are part of my life what it is to be human. On a daily basis I am trying to deal with them, and talking about them helps. They don't go away just because I talk about them, but I get them in perspective and I grow in an understanding of myself through the recognition of my prejudices. Alcoholism made me into a " fake ". I appeared to be what I was not and my prejudices were part of the camouflage. My prejudices revealed my fears and my need to "people-please". Slowly, in my daily spiritual program, I am discovering the courage to stand alone. ************************************************** ********* Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good spirit lead me on level ground. Psalm 143:10 “But I tell you: Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you.” Matthew 5:44 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Be yourself in all that you do and you will soon learn that you are very special. Lord, help me find the peace that You have already placed within my soul. Take less for granted and you will become very busy enjoying all that you have. Lord, thank you for my blessings and for all those that I am able to share them with. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today God's Will, Not Ours "We know that if we pray for God's will we will receive what is best for us, regardless of what we think." Basic Text pg. 44 By the time we came to NA, our inner voices had become unreliable and self-destructive. Addiction had warped our desires, our interests, our sense of what was best for ourselves. That's why it's been so important in recovery to develop our belief in a Power greater than ourselves, something that could provide saner, more reliable guidance than our own. We've begun learning how to rely on this Power's care and to trust the inner direction it provides us. As with all learning processes, it takes practice to "pray only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out." The selfish, ego-driven attitudes we developed in our addiction are not cast off overnight. Those attitudes may affect the way we pray. We may even find ourselves praying something like, "Relieve me of this character defect so I can look good." The more straightforward we are about our own ideas and desires, the easier it will be to distinguish between our own will and our Higher Power's will. "Just for your information, God;" we might pray, "here's what I want in this situation. Nonetheless, I ask that your will, not mine, be done." Once we do this, we are prepared to recognize and accept our Higher Power's guidance. Just for today: Higher Power, I've learned to trust your guidance, yet I still have my own ideas about how I want to live my life. Let me share those ideas with you, and then let me clearly understand your will for me. In the end, let your will, not mine, be done. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. They were the first . . . self-created people in the history of the world. And their manners were their own business. And so were their politics. And so, but ten times so, were their souls. --Archibald MacLeish There once was a child named Yemaya. Even before she could walk or talk, her mother introduced her to the trees. Yemaya touched them and they accepted her. They told her she was wonderful and she knew it was true. As she grew up, Yemaya occasionally met people who said unkind things to her. When this happened, she went back to her trees, who continued to tell her she was just fine. She couldn't understand what was wrong with those who were mean to her. Whenever they appeared and insisted on being mean, she pretended what they said was an arrow that sailed right by as she stepped out of the way. We can do the same. What others say or think is part of them and their lives, not ours. When we are wise enough to let go of things that don't belong to us, we will find our own treasures. What can I step out of the way of today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. "He doesn't talk to me," says a woman. "I don't know what she wants me to talk about," says a man. --Lillian B. Rubin We have often heard that it's better to be men of deeds, not words. In our relationships with other males, we have learned to do things together, work together, or play a sport together. But in our relationships with women, we often see the other side of this coin. If we haven't learned to express our thoughts and feelings, the women in our lives may request or demand that we learn now. There is nothing wrong with our not yet having this skill, and there is nothing wrong with women longing to talk with us. A close relationship promotes talking, and revealing thoughts and feelings. Words, when we are honest, are ways of becoming clearer and being more personal. We have the right to stumble around with our words. We also have the right to feel unsure of ourselves or frightened of saying what we feel. That kind of fear is the excitement of being close to someone we love. Today, I will express my feelings and ideas so others can know me better. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. I want to feel myself part of things, of the great drift and swirl; not cut off, missing things, like being sent to bed early as a child. --Joanna Field Feeling apart from the action and always looking on; wanting attention, and yet afraid of being noticed; no doubt these are familiar memories to most of us. We may still struggle with our self-perception, but we can celebrate that we no longer drown our moods. Connecting with the people next to us, though difficult, is no longer impossible when we rely on the program. There is a way to be a part of the action, a way that never fails. It takes only a small effort, really. We can simply look, with love, at someone nearby today and extend our hearts in honest attention. When we make someone else feel special, we'll become special too. Recovery can help each of us move beyond the boundaries of our own ego. Trusting that our lives are in the loving care of God, however we understand God, relieves us of the need for self-centeredness. We can let go of ourselves now that God is in charge, and we'll discover that we have joined the action. I will open my heart, and I'll be joined to all that's around me. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Letting Go "How much do we need to let go of?" a friend asked one day. "I'm not certain," I replied, "but maybe everything." Letting go is a spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical process, a sometimes mysterious metaphysical process of releasing to God and the Universe that which we are clinging to so tightly. We let go of our grasp on people, outcomes, ideas, feelings, wants, needs, desires - everything. We let go of trying to control our progress in recovery. Yes, it's important to acknowledge and accept what we want and what we want to happen. But it's equally important to follow through by letting go. Letting go is the action part of faith. It is a behavior that gives God and the Universe permission to send us what we're meant to have. Letting go means we acknowledge that hanging on so tightly isn't helping to solve the problem, change the person, or get the outcome we desire. It isn't helping us. In fact, we learn that hanging on often blocks us from getting what we want and need. Who are we to say that things aren't happening exactly as they need to happen? There is magic in letting go. Sometimes we get what we want soon after we let go. Sometimes it takes longer. Sometimes the specific outcome we desire doesn't happen. Something better does. Letting go sets us free and connects us to our Source. Letting go creates the optimum environment for the best possible outcomes and solutions. Today, I will relax. I will let go of that which is upsetting me the most. I will trust that by letting go, I have started the wheels in motion for things to work out in the best possible way. I am getting to know myself today. I accept who I am today. I like myself today. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart You Decide This is an old lesson, but it bears repeating and remembering. We don’t have to let anyone control our lives, our choices, our joy. No matter how well we thought we learned that lesson, it often reappears. Another person starts to pull our strings. We get involved, entangled, hooked in. We hear ourselves singing an old tune– If only she would, if only he wouldn’t, then I would be… We realize that once again we have given up too much control. We have deferred our lives to the wishes, whims, and choices of another. Yes, if we are living fully, we will have reactions to those around us. Our relationships will help shape us, teach us things. And yes, there are times we are so connected to others, love them so much, that their path does affect ours. But we don’t have to let another person control our choices, our behaviors, or our lives. Maybe she will. Maybe he won’t. But what about you? What do you want? What course of action feels right for you, for your life? Do you want to assign responsibility for whether you take that course to another? Do you really? Sometimes, no matter how much you love others, it’s time to let go, time to let them walk their path. Time to realize that it is your responsibility to walk your own. Go in love. Go in peace. Go in gentle power. You are responsible for your life. You are responsible for your choices. It doesn’t matter what the other person does. You are still responsible for you. Take care of yourself, then take it one step further. Love, nurture, honor, and respect yourself. Only you can decide what you’re going to do. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go The miracle of rebirth Birth is an exhilarating experience. Walking into a hospital room seconds after a child has been born, you can almost touch the emotion and power of the moment. Rebirth is like that,too. Sitting in a powerful religious ceremony, standing alone atop a high hill, or walking in the footsteps of an ancient civilization, we can feel our hearts being changed as our spirit is given new birth. “What have I done to deserve this?” we whisper. And the universe whispers, “It’s to move you along your path. It’s to teach you to live.” And we emerge from our experience reborn. Sometimes, it goes the other way,too. In a single moment, all that we know can be stripped away– the death of a loved one, a divorce, the loss of a job– and suddenly we’re left standing at the mercy of the universe. “Why did this happen? What did I do to deserve this?” we cry. And the universe answers, “It’s to move you along your path. It’s to teach you to live.” And once again, we rise from the ashes, reborn. Surrender to the exhilarating moments of creation in your life, both the uplifting and the heartrending ones. Touch the emotion and power. Trust that you’re being moved along your path. You’re learning how to live. Let yourself be reborn. God, please help me to accept all the life changing experiences that I may have. Help me to see the wonder in rebirth and to learn your lessons. *************************************** Now Is the Time Bloom Where You Are Planted by Madisyn Taylor The time to blossom is now, not sometime in the future when you believe the stars will be aligned for you. Having a vision for our future that differs from our current circumstances can be inspiring and exciting, but it can also keep us from fully committing to our present placement. We may become aware that this is happening when we notice our thoughts about the future distracting us from our participation in the moment. We may find upon searching our hearts that we are waiting for some future time or situation in order to self-actualize. This would be like a flower planted in North Dakota putting off blooming because it would prefer to do so in Illinois. There are no guarantees in this life, so when we hold back we do so at the risk of never fully blossoming. This present moment always offers us the ground in which we can take root and open our hearts now. What this means is that we live fully, wherever we are, not hesitating because conditions are not perfect, or we might end up moving, or we haven’t found our life partner. This can be scary, because we might feel that we are giving up our cherished dreams if we do not agree to wait for them. But this notion that we have to hold back our life force now in order to find happiness later doesn’t really make sense. What might really be happening is that we are afraid to embrace this moment, and ourselves, just exactly as we are right now. This constitutes a tendency to hold back from fully loving ourselves, as we are, where we are. We have a habit of presenting life with a set of conditions—ifs and whens that must be fulfilled before we will say yes to the gift of our lives. Now is the time for each of us to bloom where we are planted, overriding our tendency to hold back. Now is the time to say yes, to be brave and commit fully to ourselves, because until we do no one else will. Now is the time to be vulnerable, unfolding delicately yet fully into the space in which we find ourselves. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Most of us in The Program are far more comfortable with the determination that we won’t take the first drink today, than we are with the “vow” that we’ll never drink again. Saying “I intend never to drink again” is quite different from the saying, “I’ll never drink again.” The last statement is far too reflective of self-will; it doesn’t leave much room for the idea that God will remove our obsession to drink if we practice The Program’s Twelve Steps one day at a time. Will I continue to fight against complacency, realizing that I’ll always be just one drink away from disaster? Today I Pray “Never again” demands too binding a commitment, even for the strongest among us. Our past lives were full of “never agains” and won’t evers,” promises that were broken before the next dawn. May I, for now, set my sites on just one straight, sober day at a time. Today I Will Remember Never say “Never again.” *************************************** One More Day A tragedy means always a man’s struggles with that which is stronger than man. – G. K. Chesteron Once the diagnosis of a long-term illness is learned, some of us may use it as an excuse to be sad, morbid, sullen, unfeeling, and uncaring. These behaviors are all counterproductive to the fulfilling life we want to lead. Those of us who undergo a major health change may consider it a tragedy. It is; loss of good health is a frightening change. But to keep our personal problems hidden, to never reach out for help and for support — that is the truest tragedy. We can reach out to those who love us and extend our arms to our Higher Power. Rather than being bitter, we can involve ourselves in the lives of others and allow our personal tragedies to generate triumphs. My faith in a Higher Power and my faith in myself grow stronger each day. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ COURAGE ~ Courage faces fear and thereby masters it. Martin Luther King, Jr. I've never been a brave person and was always very fearful. I would watch movies where the hero would rescue the heroine, or where someone would climb Mount Everest, or perform some feat of daring, and I would be totally in awe. I was afraid of the dark, of rejection, of failure and of most other things that I was convinced took courage. No way would I go parasailing or deep sea diving as that seemed to require the courage that I lacked. I didn't understand then that people who do those kinds of things are not totally without fear, but they have a way of overcoming their fear and still doing it anyway. When I came into the program and learned that I would have to do an inventory and then, worse still, make amends to the people I had harmed, I was paralyzed by fear. Eventually I realized that, even though I feared doing these things, all I had to do was ask my Higher Power for strength and guidance and then do the things I'd most feared. Perhaps these weren't the feats of daring that I had seen heroes perform, but for me they were great victories, and in being able to do them, I knew that I was developing courage. One Day at a Time . . . I will continue to walk through my fear with my Higher Power at my side, knowing that I am developing the courage that I thought I lacked. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Having persevered with the rest of the program, they wondered why they fell. We think the reason is that they never completed their housecleaning. They took inventory all right, but hung on to some of the worst items in stock. They only THOUGHT they had lost their egoism and fear; they only THOUGHT they had humbled themselves. But they had not learned enough of humility, fearlessness and honesty, in the sense we find it necessary, until they told someone else ALL their life story. - Pg. 73 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We need special people in our lives so that we can travel the path of recovery. The special people are easy to find, they are right in front of you, your Higher Power puts them there. Let me recognize and use the special people my Divine Source has placed before me to walk beside me on this road of recovery. Feeling Good Inside I am in the present, I can actually see what the next right action might be and I can take it seamlessly, easily, fruitfully. I will see my day as an opportunity to grow; to learn to allow more of who I am to flow through me. Naturally, quietly and without force. I will become worthy of the life I have been given, grateful just to be alive for one more day. I will let life work out. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'We weren't perfect at it. Sometimes we rebelled, and rejected our sponsors' feedback or the guidance of the Steps. Still, the recovery process was always there when we needed and accepted it. (P 80, CDA First Edition) I worked my using hard, so now I work my recovery hard. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Strive for perfection; accept progress. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am getting to know myself today. I accept who I am today. I like myself today. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I ran out of the meeting screaming; 'You're not going to railroad me into being happy!' A while later I realized what I'd said. - Serenity Sam. |
December 5
Daily Reflections A NEW STATE OF CONSCIOUSNESS He has been granted a gift which amounts to a new state of consciousness and being. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p 107 Many of us in A.A. puzzle over what is a spiritual awakening. I tended to look for a miracle, something dramatic and earth shattering. But what usually happens is that a sense of well-being, a feeling of peace, transforms us into a new level of awareness. That's what happened to me. My insanity and inner turmoil disappeared and I entered into a new dimension of hope, love and peace. I think the degree to which I continue to experience this new dimension is in direct proportion to the sincerity, depth and devotion with which I practice the Twelve Steps of A.A. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day In spite of all we have learned in A.A., our old way of thinking comes back on us, sometimes with overwhelming force, and occasionally some of us have slips. We forget or refuse to call on the Higher Power for help. We seem to deliberately make our minds a blank so far as A.A. training goes, and we take a drink. We eventually get drunk. We are temporarily right back where we started from. Those who have had slips say unanimously that they were no fun. They say A.A. had taken all the pleasure out of drinking. They knew they were doing the wrong thing. The old mental conflict was back in full force. They were disgusted with themselves. Am I convinced that I can never get anything more out of drinking? Meditation For The Day Give something to those who are having trouble, to those whose thoughts are confused, something of your sympathy, your prayers, your time, your love, your thought, your self. Then give of your own confidence, as you have had it given to you by the grace of God. Give of yourself and of your loving sympathy. Give your best to those who need it and will accept it. Give according to need, never according to deserts. Remember that the giving of advice can never take the place of giving of your self. Prayer For The Day I pray that as I have received, so may I give. I pray that I may have the right answer to those who are confused. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Relapses--and the Group, p. 154 An early fear was that of slips or relapses. At first nearly every alcoholic we approached began to slip, if indeed he sobered up at all. Others would stay dry six months or maybe a year and then take a skid. This was always a genuine catastrophe. We would all look at each other and say, "Who next?" Today, though slips are a very serious difficulty, as a group we take them in stride. Fear has evaporated. Alcohol always threatens the individual, but we know that it cannot destroy the common welfare. << << << >> >> >> "It does not seem to pay to argue with 'slippers' about the proper method of getting dry. After all, why should people who are drinking tell people who are dry how it should be done? "Just kid the boys along--ask them if they are having fun. If they are too noisy or troublesome, amiably keep out of their way." 1. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 97 2. Letter, 1942 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Holding hands and hugging Sincerity The custom of holding hands while saying the Lord's Prayer has been adopted by many AA groups. We have also seen more hugging than in the past, even between the most unlikely members. Are these new practices good or bad? In accordance with AA tradition, we have to leave such questions to the group conscience. One thought, however, is that such physical actions do not necessarily mean that any true spiritual bonding has taken place. The old-timers who never held hands or hugged still had a great closeness in spirit and in feeling. We must also consider that we may be violating the privacy of the person who doesn't wish to hold hands or hug. If such a person chooses to stand outside the hand=holding circle, he or she maybe cast in the role of dissenter. Would that be fair? Hand -holding and hugging may be here to stay, but let's not make them out to be more than mere physical expressions. The program of the heart is still first. I'll remember today that true bonding is spiritual, not physical. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Each day, somewhere in the world, recovery begins when one alcoholic talks with another alcoholic, sharing experience, strength, and hope. ---Alcoholics Anonymous All over the world, recovering men and women use the same Twelve Steps to live their lives. Our fellowship keeps growing. The bigger it gets, the faster it grows. Why? Because the program brings our spirits back to life. All over the world, many of us were dying, and now we’re full of life and love. We are bringing our world bake to life. As we share our experience, strength, and hope, we help others join us in coming back to life. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me stay sober today. Guide me and all others who are doing Your will today. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll think of three things I can do to help spread the message of AA and NA. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning It is a long baptism into the seas of humankind, my daughter. Better immersion than to live untouched. --Tillie Olsen We have each had days when we preferred hiding under the covers, avoiding life at all costs. And in times gone by, we did just that, sometimes too frequently. What we didn't always know, and what we still forget on occasion, is that we have a ready and willing partner who will join us in every pursuit. The more fully we commit ourselves to one another and to all our experience, the closer we will come to the very serenity we long for. Serenity accompanies our increasing understanding of life's many mysteries. It's easy to cheat ourselves out of the prizes any day offers us. Fear fosters inertia, leaving us separate, alone, even more afraid. But we have an appointment with life. And our appointment will bring us to the place of full understanding, the place where we'll be certain, forever after, that all is well. And that life is good. Today's appointments are part of the bigger plan for my life. I will face them, enjoy them, and reap their rewards. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION Much has already been said about receiving strength, inspiration, and direction from Him who has all knowledge and power. If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us. To some extent we have become God-conscious. We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense. But we must go further and that means more action. p. 85 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. That year I went to an alcohol treatment program twice. The first time I was in treatment, I was shaving at the mirror in the bathroom and it seemed to me that my beard was growing back in as fast as I could shave it off. Even though I was in a hospital gown, I escaped, running down the streets and jumping up and over fences. I was on the porch of a woman's house banging on the door for her to let me in when the police arrived. I tried to convince them she was my life and my children were inside, but they saw the hospital bracelet on my wrist, and they took me back to the program. p. 482 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." A.A.'s manner of making ready to receive this gift lies in the practice of the Twelve Steps in our program. So let's consider briefly what we have been trying to do up to this point: Step One showed us an amazing paradox: We found that we were totally unable to be rid of the alcohol obsession until we first admitted that we were powerless over it. In Step Two we saw that since we could not restore ourselves to sanity, some Higher Power must necessarily do so if we were to survive. Consequently, in Step Three we turned our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. For the time being, we who were atheist or agnostic discovered that our own group, or A.A. as a whole, would suffice as a higher power. Beginning with Step Four, we commenced to search out the things in ourselves which had brought us to physical, moral, and spiritual bankruptcy. We made a searching and fearless moral inventory. Looking at Step Five, we decided that an inventory, taken alone, wouldn't be enough. We knew we would have to quit the deadly business of living alone with our conflicts, and in honesty confide these to God and another human being. At Step Six, many of us balked--for the practical reason that we did not wish to have all our defects of character removed, because we still loved some of them too much. Yet we knew we had to make a settlement with the fundamental principle of Step Six. So we decided that while we still had some flaws of character that we could not yet relinquish, we ought nevertheless to quit our stubborn, rebellious hanging on to them. We said to ourselves, "This I cannot do today, perhaps, but I can stop crying out `No, never!' " Then, in Step Seven, we humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings such as He could or would under the conditions of the day we asked. pp. 107-108 ************************************************** ********* Action may not always bring happiness, but there is no happiness without action. --William James Money is not required to buy one necessity of the soul. --Henry David Thoreau If you want to accomplish the goals of your life, you have to begin with the Spirit. --Oprah Winfrey The steps did for me the very thing I kept hoping alcohol would do for me --- they gave me the peace and serenity I had been looking for in a bottle. --unknown Today is full of miracles! --Ruth Fishel "The principles you live by create the world you live in; if you change the principles you live by, you will change your world." --Blaine Lee "What we see depends mainly on what we look for." --John Lubbock The ultimate lesson all of us have is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well. --Elisabeth Kubler-Ross ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation BEAUTY "Not every woman in old slippers can manage to look like Cinderella." -- Don Marquis Beauty is not what you wear or look like; beauty is within. We begin to love ourselves when we see the beauty that God has given to each and every one of us forever. God's image and beauty is expressed through our attitudes and feelings, how we greet and listen to each other and the gentle dignity we afford to another human being. For years I saw myself as ugly, boring, useless and stupid. This message came from parents who forever compared me with others and for years I believed their message. I hid through my teen-age years and quietly tried to escape in food, alcohol and drugs. Then after a crisis I met people who had felt the same but were now feeling different. They loved me until I could begin to love myself. Now I like me. Now I can love me. Today I can like and love you. Help me to see the beauty in the wrinkle; the power in the pain. ************************************************** ********* "He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty." Psalm 91:1 "Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence." I John 3:18-19 "Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, 'I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but will have the light of life.'" John 8:12 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Imagine joy and you will find it. Lord, I thank You for the people that need me and love me, for the ability to hope and especially for the ability to love. One of life's greatest rewards is not what we get, but what we become. Lord, give me the courage to be all that I can. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Those Who Want To Recover "We have seen the program work for any addict who honestly and sincerely wants to stop [using drugs]" Basic Text pg. 10 How do we know when someone honestly and sincerely wants to stop using drugs? The truth is that we don't know! Because we cannot read minds or know another's motives and desires, we simply have to hope for the best. We may talk to a newcomer at a meeting and think we'll never see them again, only to find them several years later doing well in their recovery. We may be tempted to give up on someone who keeps relapsing or doesn't get clean right away, but we must not. No matter how unwilling someone may seem, a simple fact remains - the addict is at a meeting. We may never know the results of our Twelfth Step work; it is not up to us to gauge the willingness of a newcomer. The message we carry is a part of us. We carry it everywhere and share it freely, leaving the results to a Power greater than ourselves. Just for today: I will share my recovery with any addict, anywhere, anytime, and under any circumstances. I will leave the results to my Higher Power. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. My true god is always with me. I am learning to trust myself. . . . --Joan Parsons Sometimes a book we read at a very young age stays with us our whole lives. One girl loved Heidi more than any other book. She always thought about the grandfather's hut. It was a special place in the world--with the fresh mountain air, the spring flowers, the winter fire on the hearth. But the part she carried with her to adulthood was the part about the grandfather pouring goat's milk into a bowl and telling Heidi to drink it all up so she could grow to be healthy and happy. Now that girl is a woman. Sometimes, when she wants to feel taken care of, she pours herself a bowl of milk. Then she sits down, picks up the bowl with two hands, and drinks out of it like Heidi. She feels comforted and connected to the universe. The private rituals we discover in childhood can befriend us all our lives, if we let them. What do I want when I want comfort? You are reading from the book Touchstones. [A relationship] takes time and deeds, and this involves trust, it involves making ourselves naked, to become sitting ducks for each other. --Eldridge Cleaver When we were lost in our excesses, we were limited in our relationships. The history of our friendships and loves may be evidence of that. Many of us had a primary relationship with a substance or an addictive behavior, and people had only second place. Many of us were so lost in our codependency that our relationships were two-dimensional. We didn't know how to be there with our whole selves. In recovery our ability to relate to others charges slowly. We learn how to love like everyone else learned - only we are learning a little later. We have to be willing to be vulnerable. We also must be willing to be accountable - willing to say to our loved ones, "You can count on me to never leave without saying good bye." "You can count on me to be respectful of you." "You can count on me to tell you how I feel, even when it hurts." As we mature, with the help of the Steps, we also grow in our relationships with others. Today, I will be true to my relationships. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. It is a long baptism into the seas of humankind, my daughter. Better immersion than to live untouched. --Tillie Olsen We have each had days when we preferred hiding under the covers, avoiding life at all costs. And in times gone by, we did just that, sometimes too frequently. What we didn't always know, and what we still forget on occasion, is that we have a ready and willing partner who will join us in every pursuit. The more fully we commit ourselves to one another and to all our experience, the closer we will come to the very serenity we long for. Serenity accompanies our increasing understanding of life's many mysteries. It's easy to cheat ourselves out of the prizes any day offers us. Fear fosters inertia, leaving us separate, alone, even more afraid. But we have an appointment with life. And our appointment will bring us to the place of full understanding, the place where we'll be certain, forever after, that all is well. And that life is good. Today's appointments are part of the bigger plan for my life. I will face them, enjoy them, and reap their rewards. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Difficult People Few things can make us feel crazier than expecting something from someone who has nothing to give. Few things can frustrate us more than trying to make a person someone he or she isn't; we feel crazy when we try to pretend that person is someone he or she is not. We may have spent years negotiating with reality concerning particular people from our past and our present. We may have spent years trying to get someone to love us in a certain way, when that person cannot or will not. It is time to let it go. It is time to let him or her go. That doesn't mean we can't love that person anymore. It means that we will feel the immense relief that comes when we stop denying reality and begin accepting. We release that person to be who he or she actually is. We stop trying to make that person be someone he or she is not. We deal with our feelings and walk away from the destructive system. We learn to love and care differently in a way that takes reality into account. We enter into a relationship with that person on new terms - taking our needs and ourselves into account. If a person is addicted to alcohol, other drugs, misery, or other people, we let go of his or her addiction; we take our hands off it. We give his or her life back. And we, in the process, are given our life and freedom in return. We stop letting what we are not getting from that person control us. We take responsibility for our life. We go ahead with the process of loving and taking care of ourselves. We decide how we want to interact with that person, taking reality and our own best interests into account. We get angry, we feel hurt, but we land in a place of forgiveness. We set him or her free, and we become set free from bondage. This is the heart of detaching in love. Today, I will work at detaching in love from troublesome people in my life. I will strive to accept reality in my relationships. I will give myself permission to take care of myself in my relationships, with emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual freedom for both people as my goal. Today is full of miracles! --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Life Can Be Fun How careful and guarded we’ve been with fun, with playing, with sheer enjoyment– whether we’re working, traveling, or wandering around town on a Saturday afternoon. Sometimes, we act as though there’s a limited amount, a scarce supply of fun available. We can’t take too much, or it’ll all be gone. That’s how I was for a long time. One Saturday afternoon my son, Shane, asked if he could spend the night at a friend’s house to play and have a sleepover. “Why?” I asked. “You just did something fun last night,” I reminded him. He thought for a moment. “Who said you can’t have fun two days in a row.?” Have some fun– with life, with love, with work. Then go out and have some more. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Be happy now “Time is what keeps everything from happening at once,” the bumper sticker ahead of me read. Maybe, I thought. I was racing back home from the computer store, busily doing my errands, trying to get things done. I noticed a restaurant and shopping center to my right, on the freeway. I’d been curious about this place for almost a year. Today, instead of driving by, I turned off the highway and pulled into the parking lot. I spent the next three hours browsing through the stores filled with antiques, trinkets, and gourmet foods. Then I enjoyed a leisurely dinner– a juicy hamburger and a chocolate malt– at the restaurant before returning home. The stores had always been there, I’d always driven past. Today I stopped, satisfied my curiosity, and enjoyed myself. It’s easy to spend our lives working toward a goal, convinced that if we could only get there, we’d be truly happy then. Today is the only moment we have. If we wait until tomorrow to be happy, we’ll miss out on the beauty of today. Have your plans. Set goals. Let yourself be happy now. God, help me be aware of the joy that’s in front of me now instead of waiting for tomorrow to bring me happiness. *************************************** Blue Skies The Sky Is Blue Even on a Cloudy Day by Madisyn Taylor Darker days are just as much a part of life as are the days graced with sunshine. When we refer to a “beautiful day,” we are often describing a day that is sunny, clear, and without a cloud in sight to mar a sky that is a brilliantly perfect blue. We find ourselves bouncing along, light in spirit, free from worries, and enjoying the moment. That is, until the clouds begin to form. The sky may turn grey, and a fog may roll in. Puffs of white take on whimsical, darker shades, and our beautiful day disappears along with the sunshine… or so it seems. A clear blue sky often inspires in us good cheer, bringing on a lighter, more carefree day. We may find ourselves spending time outdoors, breathing in the fresh air, and basking in the warmth of the sun. Yet should clouds appear to wash the sky with shadows, we may let this change of weather decrease our energy and enthusiasm, pulling us into our own cloudy funk. Darker days are just as much a part of life as are the days graced with sunshine. They show us a different perspective of our world, while helping us appreciate the moments of illumination that inevitably follow. A rainy day with clouds helps to clear the air, washing away stagnation. Still, it’s hard not to feel gloomy or think that the day has been ruined when there are clouds hanging over us. Yet if you can remember that these shades of grey won’t last forever, and that hidden behind the clouds is the blue sky, you will find that the beauty of your day is merely playing a game of peek-a-boo with you. Like the mis! haps and interruptions that occasionally block the brilliance that is our own lives from shining through, clouds eventually clear away so we can open up to a brighter horizon. The next time you wake up to a cloudy day, remember that these shades of grey in life are there just for the moment. And that no matter how hard the rain falls or how chilly the fog is, the clouds will go away, the sun will break through, and you will be able to see the sky that has always and forever been a beautiful and brilliant blue. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “It is of low benefit to give me something. It is of high benefit to enable me to do something for myself.” Emerson I’ve been taught in The Program that I begin to use my will properly when I try to make it conform with God’s will. In the past, most of my problems resulted from the improper use of will power. I’d always tried to use it, in sledgehammer fashion, as a way of solving my problems or changing the conditions of my life. Do I see that a primary purpose of the Twelve Steps is to help me channel my will into agreement with God’s intentions for me? Today I Pray May I direct my will-power into a channel where it can pick up the will of God. May I no longer use my will-power — which has not proved mighty in the past — as willfulness. May I think of my will only as an extension of God’s will, listening always for direction. Today I Will Remember To use my will-power as willingness, not willfulness. *************************************** One More Day Forgiveness is the answer to the child’s dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again, what is soiled is again made clean. – Dag Hammarskjold We all may feel a measure of guilt when relationships deteriorate or friends become angry with each other. Sometimes, it’s not the people around us who are to blame; sometimes it really is our fault. We’ve misspoken or said harsh and unfeeling words to a friend. We can’t undo our mistakes or take back our words, but we can ask for forgiveness and try to make amends. WE can forgive others when they have hurt us, knowing that forgiveness keeps our relationships whole. I don’t have to wait for forgiveness from others; I can make my amends first. ***************************************** One Day At A Time PERFECTION My imperfections and failures are as much a blessing from God as my successes and my talents, and I lay them both at His feet. Mahatma Gandhi I don't know why I used to think that if something wasn't done perfectly, it wasn't worth doing. I was an all-time overachiever, and to fail at something was totally unacceptable. It was hardly surprising that I couldn't like, let alone love, myself, since I set such impossibly high standards for myself. I was constantly pushing myself to excel at those things I was good at, and would beat up on myself if I failed to measure up to the high expectations I held. I was especially critical of my body and thought that if I had the perfect body, then my life would be perfect. When I came into the program, I had to learn not to be so hard on myself. For the first time I began to realize that I was human and could still be lovable and worthy, even with all my imperfections and character defects. I am lovingly reminded by my sponsor and my friends in the fellowship to be more gentle on myself, and that I don't even have to do the program perfectly. I just need to do the best I know how for that day; then I can see progress one day at a time. I don't have to push myself to be perfect all the time in order to win approval or gain love. What a relief that is! One day at a time . . . I don't have to be perfect all the time. I just need to to be the best me that I can for today, and that's the way God intended me to be. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We have found nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness. - Pg. 130 - The Family Afterward Hour To Hour - Book - Quote It seems insane that we have to be brought to our knees before we seek help, but for most of us that's the way it is. Whatever crisis got us here, we will eventually see as a blessing in disguise. Thank You Higher Power, of my understanding, for the crisis--the one that brought me to my knees, because it also bought me this hour of clean and sober time. Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Doing the next right thing in the face of a tricky situation is not a choice you can run away from. As the saying goes: Wherever you go, there you are. I do the next right thing first, so the 'situation' doesn't last. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I went outside and leaned up against the wall. I was throwing up on my shoes. And a man came out and he brought a towel and he cleaned me up, put his arms around me and said: 'Honey this is the last drunk you'll ever have to shake out.' - Gayle W. |
December 6
Daily Reflections WHEN THE CHIPS ARE DOWN When we developed still more, we discovered the best possible source of emotional stability to be God Himself. We found that dependence upon His perfect justice, forgiveness, and love was healthy, and that it would work where nothing else would. If we really depended upon God, we couldn't very well play God to our fellows nor would we feel the urge wholly to rely on human protection and care. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 116 It has been my experience that, when all human resources appear to have failed, there is always One who will never desert me. Moreover, He is always there to share my joy, to steer me down the right path, and to confide in when no one else will do. While my well-being and happiness can be added to, or diminished, by human efforts, only God can provide the loving nourishment upon which I depend for my daily spiritual health. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day People who had a slip are ashamed of themselves--sometimes so ashamed that they fear to go back to A.A. They develop the old inferiority complex and tell themselves that they are no good, that they are hopeless, and that they can never make it. This state of mind is perhaps worse than it was originally. They have probably been somewhat weakened by their slip. But their A.A. training cannot ever be entirely lost. They always know they can go back if they want to. They know there is still God's help for them if they will again ask for it. Do I believe that I can never entirely lose what I have learned in A.A.? Meditation For The Day Nobody entirely escapes temptation. You must expect it and be ready for it when it comes. None of us is entirely safe. You must try to keep your defenses up by daily thought and prayer. That is why we have these daily meditations. You must be able to recognize temptation when it comes. The first step toward conquering temptation always is to see it clearly as temptation and not to harbor it in your mind. Dissociate yourself from it, put it out of your mind as soon as it appears. Do not think of excuses for yielding to it. Turn at once to the Higher Power for help. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be prepared for whatever temptation may come to me. I pray that I may see it clearly and avoid it with the help of God. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The Way Of Strength, p. 129 We need not apologize to anyone for depending upon the Creator. We have good reason to disbelieve those who think spirituality is the way of weakness. For us, it is the way of strength. The verdict of the ages is that men of faith seldom lack courage. They trust their God. So we never apologize for our belief in Him. Instead, we try to let Him demonstrate, through us, what He can do. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 68 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Alcoholism: Disease or Bad Habit? Understanding my problem.. While AA has always considered alcoholism a disease, controversy still simmers over its definition. In the past, alcoholism has been considered a sin, a sickness, or just a very bad habit. More recently, there has been a suggestion that some "problem drinkers" might not be alcoholics at all and can very possibly bring their drinking under control. This controversy will undoubtedly continue, but it is important that recovering people understand the NATURE of alcoholism. It is deadly, it is compulsive, and it is progressive. While there are occasional reports of alcoholics who claim to have become controlled drinkers, few of us have any firsthand evidence of such changes. Much more often, we hear stories of alcoholics who try to drink again, only to find themselves headed down a rocky road. It is not necessary that we define alcoholism perfectly or precisely. What's more important is that we remember we're powerless over alcohol and cannot safely pick up a drink. No definition will change that reality for an alcoholic who has had an unmanageable life. I'm fortunate AA gave me an understanding of my problem that I can live with---one that will help me continue living. Others can worry about defining alcoholism. I'll focus on staying sober myself. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The strongest of all warriors are these two--Time and Patience. Leo Tolstay One of the first things we learn about in recovery is time. Before, we may have tried to control time by Pushing it along. We tried to hurry everything and everybody. We wanted our "quick fix." But the program tells us to slow down. Easy Does It. We probably couldn't picture ourselves staying sober for the rest of our life. So we were told to just work at staying sober today. We learned to work our program One Day at a Time. We were thought that time can be our friend. Times is our Higher Power's way of not having everything happen at once. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, you are my teacher. You are in charge of the lesson. Help me accept this. Teach me how to use my time wisely. Action for the Day: Today, I'll list five ways I use my time in ways that aren't helpful to me. I'll work at making time my friend. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Each day provides its own gifts. --Ruth P. Freedman We are guaranteed experiences that are absolutely right for us today. We are progressing on schedule. Even when our personal hopes are unmet, we are given the necessary opportunities for achieving those goals that complement our unique destinies. Today is full of special surprises, and we will be the recipient of the ones which are sent to help us grow--in all the ways necessary for our continued recovery. We might not consider every experience a gift at this time. But hindsight will offer the clarity lacking at the moment, just as it has done in many instances that have gone before. We are only offered part of our personal drama each day. But we can trust our lives to have many scenes, many acts, points of climax, and a conclusion. Each of us tells a story with our lives, one different from all other stories and yet necessary to the telling of many other stories too. The days ahead will help us tell our story. Our interactions with others will influence our outcomes and theirs. We can trust the drama and give fully to our roles. Every day is a gift exchange. I give, and I will receive. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION Step Eleven suggests prayer and meditation. We shouldn’t be shy on this matter of prayer. Better men than we are using it constantly. It works, if we have the proper attitude and work at it. It would be easy to be vague about this matter. Yet, we believe we can make some definite and valuable suggestions. pp. 85-86 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. Those were the days when they strapped you down to protect you when you went into D.T.'s. They were the worst D.T.'s I had ever experienced. I had never been so scared in my life. I thought gangsters were after me and they were going to kill me. They had me tied down, so I tried to be very quiet and hide so they wouldn't find me. The doctor told me that if I went into D.T.'s like that again might not come out. I stayed sober three months after that experience, going to some A.A. meetings. Then I drank again. A few months later I was back in the treatment program, not as sick this time, and I stayed sober for three more months. pp. 482-483 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." In Step Eight, we continued our housecleaning, for we saw that we were not only in conflict with ourselves, but also with people and situations in the world in which we lived. We had to begin to make our peace, and so we listed the people we had harmed and became willing to set things right. We followed this up in Step Nine by making direct amends to those concerned, except when it would injure them or other people. By this time, at Step Ten, we had begun to get a basis for daily living, and we keenly realized that we would need to continue taking personal inventory, and that when we were in the wrong we ought to admit it promptly. In Step Eleven we saw that if a Higher Power had restored us to sanity and had enabled us to live with some peace of mind in a sorely troubled world, then such a Higher Power was worth knowing better, by as direct contact as possible. The persistent use of meditation and prayer, we found, did open the channel so that where there had been a trickle, there now was a river which led to sure power and safe guidance from God as we were increasingly better able to understand Him. pp. 108-109 ************************************************** ********* If you are seeking to live a joyful life, add music and dance to each day! --Gary Barnes "Fear less, hope more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Hate less, love more; And all good things are yours." --Swedish Proverb It has been said that our anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, but only empties today of its strength. --Charles Haddon Spurgeon Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step. --Martin Luther King Jr. Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much. --Helen Keller The best gifts to give: To your friend - loyalty; To your enemy - forgiveness; To your boss - service; To a child - a good example; To your parents - gratitude and devotion; To your mate - love and faithfulness; To all men and women - love; To God - your life. --unknown People may doubt what you say, but they will believe what you do. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation FAILURE "There are two kinds of failures: those who thought and never did, and those who did and never --thought." Laurence J. Peter In my life I know that I am guilty of both these failures. I remember making sand castles in the air without realizing that I could attempt to build one in my life. I would see somebody I wanted to talk with and imagine a conversation, rather than going over and risking possible rejection. Today I am able to risk and I am now the possessor of a thousand memories that actually happened. I am also aware of how thoughtless I was in my addiction. I would react rather than respond; create hostility as a wall to keep people out. Today I am able to think through a problem and apologize when I am wrong. ************************************************** ********* "See how great a love the Father has bestowed upon us, that we should be called children of God; and such we are." 1 John 3:1 "Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete." John 16:24 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration No matter who you are, it is your right to have peace. Lord, help me stay on my own path to peace and to turn my back on the distractions that are so intent on keeping me from it. To have courage, think courageous, act courageous, and pray to God for courage. Lord, You are full of love for all who come to You. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Romance And Recovery "Relationships can be a terribly painful area." Basic Text pg. 78 Love is like an elixir for some of us. The excitement of a new lover, the intrigue of exploring intimacy, the sense of release we get from allowing ourselves to become vulnerable - these are all powerful emotions. But we can't forget that we have only a daily reprieve from our addiction. Holding onto this daily reprieve must be the top priority in any recovering addict's life. We can become too involved in our relationship. We can neglect old friends and our sponsor in the process. Then, when things get difficult, we often feel that we can no longer reach out to those who helped us prior to our romantic involvement. This belief can lay the groundwork for a relapse. By consistently working our program and attending meetings, we ensure that we have a network of recovery, even when we're deep in a romance. Our desire to be romantically involved is natural. But we mustn't forget that, without our program, even the healthiest relationship will not guard us against the strength of our addiction. Just for today: In my desire for romance, I will not ignore my recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact. --William James Before Orville and Wilbur Wright ever flew the first airplane at Kitty Hawk, they believed flight was possible. They had a picture of it in their minds. The first step in creating anything is to be able to picture it in our minds. If we can picture it as a possibility, we can work to make it happen. When we were small, we dreamed a thousand dreams about what could happen in our lives. Anything, even magical things, seemed like they could happen, and our world was full of visions. That part of us that believes wonderful, magical things can happen is still in us. It may have been beaten down for a while, but it is still there waiting to help us seek the wonderful, lovely, and good things in life. Which of my dreams can I work toward today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. All real living is meeting. --Martin Buber Sharing coffee with a friend or playing a game of golf with him provides a little relaxation, a little fun, and a chance to catch up on each other's lives. Such things are the meetings of life. Holding a small child on one's lap, even walking the dog are meetings too. They are relationships with other lives based on sharing time with one another. Meetings - this sharing of time - can be with the full range of our existence. A tree, a lake, a mountain, the stars meet with us in solitude and enlarge our lives. Meeting is more than driving by. We meet a neighbor, a woman walking down the sidewalk, a driver in the next car. Each meeting inspires different responses in us. With some, we may be open and receiving; with others, fearful; and yet with others, we want to exploit and use. If all life is meeting, perhaps I do not wish to meet in the way I have been. The way I meet others changes me. Maybe I am missing something. I can have more life by making more contact. God, please guide my awareness in this day to each meeting as it occurs so that 1 can make contact more fully. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Each day provides its own gifts. --Ruth P. Freedman We are guaranteed experiences that are absolutely right for us today. We are progressing on schedule. Even when our personal hopes are unmet, we are given the necessary opportunities for achieving those goals that complement our unique destinies. Today is full of special surprises, and we will be the recipient of the ones which are sent to help us grow--in all the ways necessary for our continued recovery. We might not consider every experience a gift at this time. But hindsight will offer the clarity lacking at the moment, just as it has done in many instances that have gone before. We are only offered part of our personal drama each day. But we can trust our lives to have many scenes, many acts, points of climax, and a conclusion. Each of us tells a story with our lives, one different from all other stories and yet necessary to the telling of many other stories too. The days ahead will help us tell our story. Our interactions with others will influence our outcomes and theirs. We can trust the drama and give fully to our roles. Every day is a gift exchange. I give, and I will receive. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Letting Go of Shame Many of us were victimized, sometimes more than once. We may have been physically abused, sexually abused, or exploited by the addictions of another. Understand that if another person has abused us, it is not cause for us to feel shame. The guilt for the act of abuse belongs to the perpetrator, not the victim. Even if in recovery we fall prey to being victimized, that is not cause for shame. The goal of recovery is learning self-care, learning to free ourselves from victimization, and not to blame ourselves for past experiences. The goal is to arm ourselves so we do not continue to be victimized due to the shame and unresolved feelings from the original victimization. We each have our own work, our issues, and our recovery tasks. One of those tasks is to stop pointing our finger at the perpetrator, because it distracts us. Although we hold each person responsible and accountable for his or her behavior, we learn compassion for the perpetrator. We understand that many forces have come into play in that person's life. At the same time, we do not hold on to shame. We learn to understand the role we played in our victimization, how we fell into that role and did not rescue ourselves. But that is information to arm us so that it need not happen again. Let go of victim shame. We have issues and tasks, but our issue is not to feel guilty and wrong because we have been victimized. Today, I will set myself free from any victim shame I may be harboring or hanging on to. I feel lighter and better about myself when I don't procrastinate. Today I am discovering the freedom of completing at last one thing that I don't put off. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Discover True Power Much of our journey involves learning about power. We learn about the powers we don’t have– the power to control others, sometimes ourselves, and fate. We discover our true power– the power to take an endless journey into freedom and love. We talk about, experience, and experiment with many kinds of power along the way. The power of authority. The power of money. The power of prestige. The power of control. The power of rage, anger, intimidation. We see many kinds of negative powers– manipulation, deceit, fraud. We see people trying to steal power from others. We see people letting others take their power away, crawling into shells, hiding, and being dragged along by others. We see that many forms of power are illusions. Money goes just so far. Prestige is fleeting. Popularity holds no immunity from life’s experiences. Control is only momentary, we turn our backs and the situation reverts. We trudge the road searching for power, learning about our own. Somewhere on the journey, we begin to see the truth. It awakens quietly within us, shaking our soul, transforming our vision, teaching us what we knew all along. The power that lasts, the power that stays is the power of the heart. Stillness. Faith. Gentleness. Kindness. Compassion. Joy. Forgiveness. Comfort. Vulnerability. Honesty. Courage. And love. Now we’re talking about power. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Celebrate Look at your life. Look back at the path that you’ve walked this far and celebrate. One of the joys of walking to the top of a mountain is looking back at how far you’ve come. It’s wonderful to stand on a high ridge and see the tiny footpath stretching off into the distance. Celebrate with awe how far you’ve come in those first few steps of sobriety and in your faith and willingness to let go of your fears. Celebrate those first faltering moments of learning what it meant to take care of yourself. Even now, with each step you take, you are being transformed. Celebrate! Turn around. Look. See how far you’ve come. Celebrate the journey that you’ve taken so far. And look forward to the adventure that lies ahead. God, help me celebrate all our triumphs. Thank you for walking with me, even when I felt I was walking alone. *************************************** A Clear Current Maintaining the Flow by Madisyn Taylor Life energy flows through us like a swift stream when there is nothing to obstruct it. The essence of all being is energy. Our physical and ethereal selves depend on the unrestricted flow of life energy that is the source of wholeness and wellness. Though the channels through which this energy flows are open systems and influenced by factors outside of our control, we ultimately choose what impact these will have in our lives. It is up to us to identify and clear blockages in the energy field to ensure that flow is maintained. A healthy, grounded individual absorbs some portion of the energy emitted by other people and the environment, but this does not interrupt the continuous stream of balanced energy sustaining them. The same individual copes constructively with stress and upset, and they are not subject to the stagnation that frequently goes hand in hand with negativity. When we keep the energy in and around our bodies flowing harmoniously, we are naturally healthy, vibrant, and peaceful. Life energy flows through us like a swift stream when there is nothing to obstruct it, but various forces such as trauma, downbeat vibrations, and disappointments act like stones that impede the current. If we allow these to pile up, our life energy is thrown off its course or blocked entirely, causing illness, restlessness, and a lack of vigor. If, however, we take the time to clear these forces away, we rob them of the power to impact our lives. When we cultivate simple yet affirmative habits such as taking regular cleansing baths, practicing meditation and breathing exercises, smudging, and self-shielding, we protect ourselves from outside influences that might otherwise impede our energy flow. Likewise, we lessen the impact of inner influences when we clear our auras of unwanted attachments and divest ourselves of blocked emotions. A strong and fluid energy field is the key that unlocks the doors of self-healing and peace of mind. Your awareness of the flow of energy sustaining you empowers you to take charge of your own well-being by taking steps to unblock, correct, and enhance that flow. Fear will likely be the culprit when you cannot identify the source of stagnation—you may simply be afraid to let go of what is obstructing the flow. Letting go can be challenging, but the exuberance you will feel when the flow is restored will be a welcome and blessed reward. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day When I finally convince myself to let go of a problem that’s been tearing me apart — when I take the action to set aside my will and let God handle the problem — my torment subsides immediately. If I continue to stay out of my own way, then solutions begin to unfold and reveal themselves. More and more, I’m coming to accept the limitations of my human understanding and power. More and more, I’m learning to let go and trust my Higher Power for the answers and the help. Do I keep in the forefront of my mind the fact that only God is all-wise and all-powerful? Today I Pray If I come across a stumbling-block, may I learn to step out of the way and let God remove it. May I realize my human limitations at problem-solving, since I can never begin to predict God’s solutions until I see them happening. May I know that whatever answer I come to, God may have a better one. Today I Will Remember God has a better answer. *************************************** One More Day A leader is a dealer in hope. –Napoleon Bonaparte A good leader doesn’t always have the firmest hand or the most knowledge about a subject, but instead has the ability to develop hope and enthusiasm for success in others. Leading others often means being a role model; it means confidently marching forward, not pushing others from behind. We all are leaders at one time or another. Raising children or working with others or nurturing relationships — all require leadership at times. Our health care also requires our leadership, and we find the most success when we lead with a hopeful spirit. That hope is reflected in our cooperation with the medical community, and it is also shown in our eagerness to live life fully and joyfully. My hope, enthusiasm, and growth help me and others deal with chronic illness. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ FORGIVENESS ~ We realized that the people who wronged us were spiritually sick. When a person offended we said to ourselves, "This is a sick man. How can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done." Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous This has been one of the most important paragraphs for me in recovery. I have used it for any type of hurt I have in reaction to another person. Besides my asking God to save me from anger, I ask God to heal all feelings I have toward that person that block me from having a closer relationship with the God of my understanding. For me, this has meant I have had to learn to forgive everyone who my thinking told me had injured me in some way. I was unable to do this no matter how hard I tried. I prayed to the God of my understanding to teach me how to forgive those others and to work with my heart to create that forgiveness. It involved a long process of discovering my part and the other's part; separating acts from people. Once I had done this work and knew in my heart that God had given me the miracle to forgive these people, an interesting thing happened. During Step Four and Five work, my sponsor told me I also had to forgive myself. I discovered, by going through this process, that working through the anger and pain, I ended up also having forgiven myself. For me, it wasn't enough to tell another person all my Fourth Step. I had to feel the feelings in my heart and give them to God to heal. Then, after I truly forgave others I could forgive myself. I wasn't able to forgive myself until I gave it away to others. One Day at a Time . . . I will remember that God will help me in anything I ask, the answer just may be different than I expected. When the miracle occurs I will be able to see God's hand in it. Judy A. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote As a class, alcoholics are energetic people. They work hard and they play hard. Your man should be on his mettle to make good. Being somewhat weakened, and faced with physical and mental readjustment to a life which knows no alcohol, he may overdo. You may have to curb his desire to work sixteen hours a day. You may need to encourage him to play once in a while. He may wish to do a lot for other alcoholics and something of the sort may come up during business hours. A reasonable amount of latitude will be helpful. This work is necessary to maintain his sobriety. - Pg. 146 - To Employers Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Fragments of our addiction never stop calling, 'Hey, just one won't hurt; look, what's so wrong with going to that party; it's disloyal to stop seeing old friends.' But those of us who've been around awhile recognize the 'callings' for what they are. Give the 'calls' an inch and we KNOW addiction takes a mile. When my mind is niggled with addiction excuses for setting myself up, may I follow program advice and call my sponsor or counselor. Meditation Today, I recognize the source of light and wisdom that is within me. When I look outside myself to learn about what is actually inside, I need to exercise great discernment because some of what I see fits and some does not. There is a fountain within me that is ever full and waiting to be discovered. When I can rest quietly in this inner place, I experience a sense of fullness, and my desire to go outside diminishes and gives way to a preference for undisturbed peace. Solitude takes on a different meaning when I can contact that quiet within. Life softens and external things become less important. I look for this place within me on a daily basis. I give myself this present today. I search within. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When the pain of where you were is worse than the discomfort of where you are going, then you'll move. The pain of my growth is a good sign, not a stop sign. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Life without recovery: Even roses have thorns. Life in recovery: Even thorns have roses. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I feel lighter and better about myself when I don't procrastinate. Today I am discovering the freedom of completing at last one thing that I don't put off. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote You hear all kinds of nonsense. Like: 'If you're in pain you're not working the program.' 'If you're afraid, you're not working the Steps.' Believing that nearly tore me apart for years. How can you possibly practice spiritual principles without going through periods, not only of pain, but of suffering and unbelievable agony? It's impossible. Because what I'm doing is uprooting illusions that I've based my very life on; all those old ideas, those lies I believed, and I'm wrenching them out. Like having six teeth pulled with no sedative - And I'm going to feel good? - Cubby S. |
December 7
Daily Reflections TRUE AMBITION True ambition is not what we thought it was. True ambition is the deep desire to live usefully and walk humbly under the grace of God. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 124-25 During my drinking years, my one and only concern was to have my fellow man think highly of me. My ambition in everything I did was to have the power to be at the top. My inner self kept telling me something else but I couldn't accept it. I didn't even allow myself to realize that I wore a mask continually. Finally, when the mask came off and I cried out to the only God I could conceive, the Fellowship of A.A., my group and the Twelve Steps were there. I learned how to change resentments into acceptance, fear into hope and anger into love. I have learned also, through loving without undue expectations, through sharing my concerns and caring for my fellow man, that each day can be joyous and fruitful. I begin and end my day with thanks to God, who has so generously shed His grace on me. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When people come back to A.A. after having a slip, the temptation is strong to say nothing about it. No other A.A. member should force them to declare themselves. It is entirely up to them. If they are well-grounded in A.A., they will realize that it's up to them to speak up at the next meeting and tell about their slip. There is no possible evasion of this duty, if they are thoroughly honest and really desirous of living the A.A. way again. When they have done it, their old confidence returns. They are home again. Their slip should not be mentioned again by others. They are again a good member of A.A. Am I tolerant of other peoples' mistakes? Meditation For The Day It is in the union of a soul with God that strength, new life and spiritual power come. Bread sustains the body but we cannot live by bread alone. To try to do God's will is the meat and support of true living. We feed on that spiritual food. Soul starvation comes from failing to do so. The world talks about bodies that are undernourished. What of the souls that are undernourished? Strength and peace come from partaking of spiritual food. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not try to live by bread alone. I pray that my spirit may live by trying to do the will of God as I understand it. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Foundation For Life, p. 33 We discover that we receive guidance for our lives to just about the extent that we stop making demands upon God to give it to us on order and on our terms. << << << >> >> >> In praying, we ask simply that throughout the day God place in us the best understanding of His will that we can have for that day, and that we be given the grace by which we may carry it out. << << << >> >> >> There is a direct linkage among self-examination, meditation, and prayer. Taken separately, these practices can bring much relief and benefit. But when they are logically related and interwoven, the result is an unshakable foundation for life. 12 & 12 1. p. 104 2. p. 102 3. p. 98 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places What rather than who Principles before Personalities. We're sometimes led to do something because a persuasive or important person recommends it. This is, in fact, the strategy behind endorsement advertising. We learn in AA that it's more important to ask what is right that who is offering a course of action. If a course of action is right, it matters not who recommends it. If it is wrong, a dozen important poeole cannot make it right by endorsing it. There are, indeed, many important people whom we can know and trust. But we should always remember that every human being will turn out to have clay feet if he or she is set up as a god. Our trust must always be in our Higher Power and in principles that never fail. I'll not be unduly impressed today by persuasive, charismatic people. I'll follow their ideas only if I believe them to be right. Principles have a precedence over personality. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple We are here to add what we can to, not to get what we can get from, Life. Sir William Osler Service is a word we hear in our recovery program. Service means work we do for others. It's the backbone of our program. The reason is simple. Service to our Higher Power and to others breaks down our wanting to be self-centered. Service brings us back into the world. We really are part of the group when we pitch in to make coffee, set up chairs, or talk in meetings. We really feel like part of the family when we run errands and help with meals and housework. We really connect with our Higher Power when we pray, "Use me today to help others." Service breaks down the feeling of being alone that being self -centered brings. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to be of service to You and others. Show me what is needed. Action for the Day: Today will be a service day. I'll see how valued I am. I'll give to others, knowing that I, too, will receive. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Promises that you make to yourself are often like the Japanese plum tree--they bear no fruit. --Frances Marion The resolve to fulfill commitments we make to ourselves and others may be lacking until we learn to rely on the wisdom and strength offered by our higher power--strength that will make us confident in any situation; wisdom that will insure our right actions. What is difficult alone is always eased in partnership. We promise ourselves changed behavior, new habits, perhaps, or a positive attitude. But then we proceed to focus on our liabilities, giving them even more power, a greater hold over us. We can practice our assets, and they'll foster the promises we want to keep. No longer need we shame ourselves about unfulfilled promises. Whatever our desires, whatever our commitments, if for the good of others and ourselves, they will come to fruition. We can ask for direction. We can ask for resolve, and each worthy hope and unrealized promise will become reality. My assets, when strengthened through use, pave the way for God's help. Any promise can bear fruit when I make it in partnership with God. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION When we retire at night, we constructively review our day. Were we resentful, selfish, dishonest or afraid? Do we owe an apology? Have we kept something to ourselves which should be discussed with another person at once? Were we kind and loving toward all? What could we have done better? Were we thinking of ourselves most of the time? Or were we thinking of what we could do for others, of what we could pack into the stream of life? But we must be careful not to drift into worry, remorse or morbid reflection, for that would diminish our usefulness to others. After making our review we ask God’s forgiveness and inquire what corrective measures should be taken. p. 86 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. Then I went on a ten-day binge. I was filled with fear and I couldn't walk. I had to crawl to make it to the bathroom. I eventually cleaned myself up and managed to work. Then a Thanksgiving party on the job started me back drinking every day through Christmas. I was laid off after that; then I really got down to some serious drinking. By mid-January I was having hallucinations that would not go away. p. 483 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." So, practicing these Steps, we had a spiritual awakening about which finally there was no question. Looking at those who were only beginning and still doubted themselves, the rest of us were able to see the change setting in. From great numbers of such experiences, we could predict that the doubter who still claimed that he hadn't got the "spiritual angle," and who still considered his well-loved A.A. group the higher power, would presently love God and call Him by name. p. 109 ************************************************** ********* The heart is wiser than the intellect. --Josiah Holland (1819-1881) You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. --Kahlil Gibran The human contribution is the essential ingredient. It is only in the giving of oneself to others that we truly live. --Ethel Percy Andrus One of the great gifts of sobriety is learning to see beauty in things not always with the eyes, but with the feeling of the heart. --Shelley "When you get in a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hold on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn." --Harriet Beecher Stowe "When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on." --Franklin D. Roosevelt ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation REALITY "Man is a complex being: he makes deserts bloom and lakes die." -- Gil Stern I am a mixture of good and bad. When I was drinking I could be cruel, sarcastic and violent and at other times loving, sensitive and thoughtful. Today in my recovery I know I can be honest, humble and creative, but I also carry within me a dark and destructive side that often hurts, lies and seeks negative power. What a mixture I was and what a mixture I still am! From all my many conversations with a variety of people I have discovered that this is what it is to be human. Today I am able to accept this and develop my spiritual life. I am not perfect, but I try to improve my attitude and behavior. I am not God, but I can aspire to be the best that I can be. Today I own the sickness in my life, but I also accept the responsibility for recovery. With my feet in the dirt, I look to the stars. ************************************************** ********* “To you, O lord, I called; to the Lord I cried for mercy: ‘What gain is there in my destruction, in my going down to the pit? Will the dust praise you? Will it proclaim your faithfulness? Hear, O Lord, and be merciful to me; O Lord, be my help.’ You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever.” Psalms 30: 8-12 "Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me." Psalm 51:10 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration For everyone there is a way to serve and honor God in this life on earth. Lord, let me seize every opportunity, no matter how small, to glorify You, make you better known and always bring myself and others closer to You. Part with what you cherish if it separates you or leads you away from God. Lord, help me place my heart in the right place so that I am not distracted in my journey to Eternal Life. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Surviving Our Emotions "We use the tools available to us and develop the ability to survive our emotions." Basic Text pg. 30 "Survive my emotions?" some of us say. "You've got to be kidding!" When we were using, we never gave ourselves the chance to learn how to survive them. You don't survive your feelings, we thought-you drug them. The problem was, that "cure" for our unsurvivable emotions was killing us. That's when we came to Narcotics Anonymous, started working the Twelve Steps and, as a result, began to mature emotionally. Many of us found emotional relief right from the start. We were tired of pretending that our addiction and our lives were under control; it actually felt good to finally admit they weren't. After sharing our inventory with our sponsor, we began to feel like we didn't have to deny who we were or what we felt in order to be accepted. When we'd finished making our amends, we knew we didn't have to suffer with guilt; we could own up to it and it wouldn't kill us. The more we worked the NA program, the better we felt about living life as it came to us. The program works today as well as it ever did. By taking stock of our day, getting honest about our part in it, and surrendering to reality, we can survive the feelings life throws our way. By using the tools available to us, we've developed the ability to survive our emotions. Just for today: I will not deny my feelings. I will practice honesty and surrender to life as it is. I will use the tools of this program to survive my emotions. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Only people who have joyfully accepted themselves can take all the risks and responsibilities of being themselves. --John Powell If we have ever gone to school with a black eye, we know how embarrassing it can be. We feel self-conscious and ill at ease. Friends come up to us one after another to ask how we got it. We may want to stay away from people until the eye is better. All of us have things about ourselves we have a hard time accepting. It doesn't have to be as unusual as a black eye. We may think we're too big, too little, too slow, not good readers, not good looking enough, or not popular enough. We may need to talk about these things with someone else, so these bits of ourselves we don't accept won't limit our freedom to grow. By talking to another, we may find those traits aren't noticed by anyone but ourselves. We may also find that what we once thought of as weak points can be turned to strengths. What weakness can I turn to a strength today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Seldom, or perhaps never, does a marriage develop into an individual relationship smoothly and without crises; there is no coming to consciousness without pain. --Carl Jung We don't seek perfect relationships in marriage or in other places in our lives. What we seek instead are real and honest connections. Perfection has a picture-book form, but it has no depth and no personality. This means that sometimes we will get upset with others, or they will get upset with us. We need a basic commitment to stay in the relationship dialogue, to continue returning to it as long as both people are willing to work on it. Working through crises is how a relationship grows from simply being an idea to having its unique reality. We will be frightened by the rough spots. We will wonder if there is something wrong with us or with the other person, or the relationship. We cannot escape such questions. To run from the difficulties cuts off the possibilities for growth. It is a frightening thing to become real, to come into consciousness. Today, I pray for courage to remain honest and faithful to real relationships through the crises. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Promises that you make to yourself are often like the Japanese plum tree--they bear no fruit. --Frances Marion The resolve to fulfill commitments we make to ourselves and others may be lacking until we learn to rely on the wisdom and strength offered by our higher power--strength that will make us confident in any situation; wisdom that will insure our right actions. What is difficult alone is always eased in partnership. We promise ourselves changed behavior, new habits, perhaps, or a positive attitude. But then we proceed to focus on our liabilities, giving them even more power, a greater hold over us. We can practice our assets, and they'll foster the promises we want to keep. No longer need we shame ourselves about unfulfilled promises. Whatever our desires, whatever our commitments, if for the good of others and ourselves, they will come to fruition. We can ask for direction. We can ask for resolve, and each worthy hope and unrealized promise will become reality. My assets, when strengthened through use, pave the way for God's help. Any promise can bear fruit when I make it in partnership with God. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. When the Time is Right There are times when we simply do not know what to do, or where to go, next. Sometimes these periods are brief, sometimes lingering. We can get through these times. We can rely on our program and the disciplines of recovery. We can cope by using our faith, other people, and our resources. Accept uncertainty. We do not always have to know what to do or where to go next. We do not always have clear direction. Refusing to accept the inaction and limbo makes things worse. It is okay to temporarily be without direction. Say, "I don't know," and be comfortable with that. We do not have to try to force wisdom, knowledge, or clarity when there is none. While waiting for direction, we do not have to put our life on hold. Let go of anxiety and enjoy life. Relax. Do something fun. Enjoy the love and beauty in your life. Accomplish small tasks. They may have nothing to do with solving the problem, or finding direction, but this is what we can do in the interim. Clarity will come. The next step will present itself. Indecision, inactivity, and lack of direction will not last forever. Today, I will accept my circumstances even if I lack direction and insight. I will remember to do things that make myself and others feel good during those times. I will trust that clarity will come of its own accord. Today I know that I can get through anything that happens in this day with the help of my Higher Power. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Let Go of Feeling Overwhelmed So often the simple tasks of life can seem overwhelming. But feeling overwhelmed is only a reaction to them. Many things need to be done–laundry, housekeeping, car maintenance, bills, taxes, appointments, work– the everyday responsibilities of our lives. The task of quietly beginning, doing the first step of the first task can help us find our way through. Once we begin, we see that things aren’t overwhelming. The simple act of setting to the task simplifies it. Our sense of peace reappears in the magic of the present moment. Magic and power don’t come from contemplating all that lies ahead, how much needs to be done, all that might go wrong, whether we’ll get through. That’s fear. We don’t find the magic and power by denying, escaping, or ignoring our feelings, even feelings of being overwhelmed. Feel what you need to feel. Release it. Go forward in love, one moment at a time. We will be given the power to do all we need to do. Take the simple steps that lie before you. Take one step at a time. You’ll find the way again. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Enjoy your successes Eventually, if you put enough effort into something, it gets finished. The house is built, the picture is painted, the report is completed. Let yourself rest and relax in those moments. Take a moment to enjoy the feeling of completeness. That moment will be a fleeting one. There are many more ideas and tasks waiting around the bend. Gaining experience and learning lessons from failed efforts is an important part of our path. But success feels good,too, and it’s meant to be enjoyed. If you’ve had a recent accomplishment in your life, take some time off. Celebrate it. Celebrate those smaller moments of victory,too. Sit back, look at what you’ve done and say, “It is good.” Take yourself out to dinner, take a vacation, or even a short trip to the beach. Reflect on your past successes. Forget about your failures and the things that went wrong. Think about all that you’ve done right in your life, the things that have worked out, the answered prayers. Don’t just stare at your problems and everything that’s gone wrong. Look at what’s right about your life,too. Sit back and rest for a moment. Then say, How sweet it is. God, thank you for all my victories, for all the challenges you’ve helped me meet. Thanks for all those times you answered my prayers and met my needs. Help me rest and celebrate the good in my life. *************************************** Listening and Responding Body Language by Madisyn Taylor Tuning in to the language of our bodies can be very enlightening and increases our intuition. So much can be revealed to us when we listen to the language of our bodies. Our bodies are always speaking, sending us messages through the way we move, the sensations that arise from within, and the gestures and expressions that we make when we are communicating with others. Tuning in to the language of our bodies can be very enlightening, especially as most communication is believed to take place nonverbally. It is also believed that the body never lies, and that if we want to know the truth about ourselves and others, then we should listen to what our bodies have to say. Anyone who has ever flirted with someone they are attracted to has probably, at one point in time or another, brushed their hands through their hair or found themselves leaning forward to get closer to that person. Someone feeling defensive will tend to cross their arms over their chest, while a person who wants to withhold something may look away when speaking. If you want to know how you truly feel about a person or a situation, then it is a good idea to tune in to what you are feeling inside. Excitement, nervousness, anxiety, and fear are just some of the messages that your body wants you to hear. Your body can also be a very reliable compass. Anyone who has ever been somewhere they don’t want to be has probably experienced their bodies trying to move them away from that particular circumstance. And while it can be very easy to talk ourselves into and out of choices we may make with our minds, it isn’t so easy to change the truth of our hearts that reside within our bodies. To begin tuning in to this subtle form of communication, start taking the time to notice what your body is telling you. Greet each feeling or sensation as a message carrying wisdom from your body. Tune in to what your body is telling you about the situations and people you encounter and listen to what others are communicating to you through their bodies. We already are subconsciously receptive to the language of our bodies, but when we choose to consciously pay attention, we hear and understand so much more about ourselves and the people around us. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day As long as I stubbornly hang on to the conviction that I can live solely by my individual strength and intelligence, for just that long a working faith in my Higher Power is impossible. This is true no matter how strongly I believe that God exists. My religious beliefs — no matter how sincere — will remain forever lifeless if I continue trying to play God myself. What it comes down to, we find, is that as long as we place self-reliance first, true reliance upon a Higher Power is out of the question. How strong is my desire to seek and do God’s will? Today I Pray I pray that I may not place my self-reliance above reliance of God. May I know that there is no conflict between taking responsibility for my own actions, which I have been taught is the essence of maturit7y, and looking to God for guidance. May I remember that if I stick to the “do-it-myself” rule, it is like refusing to ask for a road map from a tourist information bureau — and wandering around forever lost. Today I Will Remember Maturity is knowing where to go for help. *************************************** One More Day Man adjusts to what he should not; he is unable to adjust to what he should –Jean Toomer Most teenagers love French fries, pop, and candy bars. We know that most fast-food and sugar is bad for us — and so do teenagers — but many of us continue to munch on junk food. Now that we have an adult’s perspective, one would think that adjusting to new things or getting rid of bad habits would become easier. No so! Adjusting to change is not easy, particularly when it involves our health. One of the most difficult problems is maintaining a balance between dealing with the chronic problem and wanting to live without it. We learn, despite our resistance to change, that we can have an illness and can adjust — we can remain strong and happy. I am confident of my ability to deal with my illness, and live a good life. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ CHANGE ~ If we don't change, we don't grow. If we don't grow, we are not really living. Gail Sheehy Throughout my life, I have been terrified of change. To me, change meant abandoning one set of experiences which, although adverse, were at least familiar. I thought I'd be replacing them with another set of experiences which would surely be at least as bad, and which had the additional disadvantage of being unknown. In this program, I was appalled to see a whole room of people who spoke enthusiastically, joyfully, about the changes that the program was bringing to their lives --not just in terms of released weight, but in so many areas of day-to-day living. Panic-stricken at the idea that I, too, would change, I talked about it after the first meeting with a dear friend. "Hey," she smiled. "No one's forcing you. If changing gets too scary, you can always decide you want to stay put." Armed with that slight reassurance, I decided I would go with the program until it got too scary. In the course of the next weeks, as I maintained strict abstinence and began to work the Steps, strange things began to happen, imperceptibly at first. I found myself looking forward to getting up in the morning and adding all kinds of things to my morning ritual: body lotion, foot care, cosmetics. Amazingly, my life-long habit of nail-biting disappeared, and my nails are not only well-tended, but polished! On the professional level, I started keeping a list of projects due, instead of relying on my sketchy memory. I hired someone to answer phones and to help keep my eternally messy desk more or less clear. Most important, I have started an honest reassessment of my relationship with my life partner, and have decided that it's not enough that this is the first relationship of my life that is free of physical abuse; I deserve to be loved and desired, and to have that love and desire expressed. At a face-to-face program meeting this week, I read the Promises. I was amazed to hear a strong, confident voice--mine--saying "Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change," and I realized that I was changing. I love it! One Day at a Time . . . I will welcome change, for change is growth, and I will know that, now that I have placed my life in the hands of my Higher Power, any change will be for the better. Sharon N. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow it's suggestions. Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and march on. They will approach still other sick ones and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out. - Pg. 153 - A Vision For You Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Every day of sobriety is a high degree of attainment. On this early day of sobriety, we have attained another day of dignity, another day with no new regrets, and another day to hold our head up high. As I hold my head high today, I look in the mirror and say, 'Hi ______. Happy _____(put in the number) day of sobriety. You're doing fantastic!' Who Am I? Today I will ask this question over and over again. I will not expect an answer. I will ask for the sake of asking, I will ask in order to put my mind in the frame of searching for a deeper life of the spirit, I will ask to be guided, toward awareness of all that is eternal. I will ask this question throughout my life without ever expecting or insisting upon an answer. I understand that God lives in the asking, that God is too great and vast to reduce to any simple answer, that God lives in the question. I am curious about the deeper mysteries of this life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'We could never learn to be brave and patient, if there were only joy in the world.' ~Helen Keller My adversities are opportunities in disguise. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Don't try to be normal; try to be healthy. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know that I can get through anything that happens in this day with the help of my Higher Power. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I told the operator I wanted to talk to Alcoholics Anonymous - this was 28 years ago - so instead of giving me the Central Office she gave me the local Alano Club. The person picked up and said: 'Hello.' and gave the phone number. I said: 'I want to talk to whoever's in charge.' - I always believed in going immediately to the top. And there was a hell of an argument on the other end, as they snatched the phone away from each other while they decided who was in charge. Finally, one guy got on and said - and doesn't this make sense? Listen to this; he said: 'Our Higher Power can't speak to you on the phone right now, but I have been authorized to speak in His behalf on any issues of recovery.' - Franny S. |
December 8
Daily Reflections SERVICE Life will take on a new meaning. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you. to have a host of friends - this is an experience you must not miss. . . . Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 89 It is through service that the greatest rewards are to be found. But to be in a position of offering true, useful and effective service to others, I must first work on myself. This means that I have to abandon myself to God, admitting my faults and clearing away the wreckage of my past. Work on myself has taught me how to find the necessary peace and serenity to successfully merge inspiration and experience. I have learned how to be, in the truest sense, an open channel of sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The length of time of our sobriety is not as important as the quality of it. A person who has been in A.A. for a number of years may not be in as good mental condition as a person who has only been in a few months. It is a great satisfaction to have been an A.A. member for a long time and we often mention it. It may sometimes help the newer members, because they may say to themselves, if they can do it I can do it. And yet the older members must realize that as long as they live they are only one drink away from a drunk. What is the quality of my sobriety? Meditation For The Day "And greater works than this shall ye do." We can do greater works when we have more experience of the new way of life. We can have all the power we need from the Unseen God. We can have His grace, His spirit, to make us effective as we go along each day. Opportunities for a better world are all around us. Greater works can we do. But we do not work alone. The power of God is behind all good works. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may find my rightful place in the world. I pray that my works may be made more effective by the grace of God. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Two-Way Tolerance, p. 73 "Your point of view was once mine. Fortunately, A.A. is constructed so that we need not debate the existence of God; but for best results, most of us must depend upon a Higher Power, and no right-minded A.A. would challenge your privilege to believe precisely that way. We should all be glad that good recoveries can be made even on this limited basis. "But turnabout is fair play. If you would expect tolerance for your point of view, I am sure you would be willing to reciprocate. I try to remember that, down through the centuries, lots of brighter people than I have been found on both sides of this debate about belief. For myself, of late years, I am finding it much easier to believe that God made man, than that man made God." Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places A new frame of mind Mood Control Long after AA was started, the term mood-altering drug came into vogue. Though this originally was applied to hard drugs, it is also true of alcohol. There's nothing wrong with wanting to alter one's mood. None of us really wants to be depressed, anxious, or fearful. We're all looking for ways to stay happy and high-spirited. The problem with all mood-altering drugs, alcohol included, is that they provide temporary highs while bringing on long-term destruction and enslavement. We would love to have those highs if they did not carry such a terrible price. But we can seek a new frame of mind in sober living that will give us better moods without destroying us. This is "the peace that passes all understanding," and it comes only from living the right way and listening to our Higher Power. This is the only mood control that really works. I want to be in a good mood today, but it must be as a result of having a healthy frame of mind. I have no desire for the false highs that were killing me. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple "When I was about 12, I used to think I must be a genius, but nobody's noticed."---John Lennon. "We all have secret ideas about ourselves. How often we have said to ourselves, If only They knew...But if we watch others, we see that many of their ideas are not so secret. We can often guess how they see themselves by the way they act. We all act out our secrets. Faith means trusting our Higher Power with our secrets. Faith in others means trusting them with our secret feelings. Why share these secrets? When we were using alcohol or other drugs we lived too much in a secret world. We need to give up the secrets that keep us from others. We need others in our lives. Our spirits need to be close to others. Prayer for the Day: God, help me to live in ways I'm not ashamed to tell others. Allow me to meet you and others, free of shame. Action for the Day: Today, I'll share one of my secrets w/ a loving friend." ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning I have found that sitting in a place where you have never sat before can be inspiring. --Dodie Smith Repeatedly, today and every day, we will be in new situations, new settings with old friends, and old settings and situations with new friends. Each instance is fresh, unlike all the times before. And inspiration can accompany each moment, if we but recognize how special it is. "We will not pass this way again," so the song says, which heightens the meaning of each encounter, every experience. Acknowledging that something can be gained each step along the way invites inspiration. Inspiration moves us to new heights. We will be called to step beyond our present boundaries. Maybe today. Whenever the inspiration catches our attention, we can trust its invitation; we are ready for the challenge it offers. We need not let our narrow, personal expectations of an experience, a new situation perhaps, prevent us from being open to all the dynamic possibilities it offers. I must be willing to let my whole self be moved, inspired. I must be willing to let each moment I experience be the only moment getting my attention. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives. p. 86 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. I called the residential treatment program and said I wanted help. They told me I could be admitted in three days. I drank to maintain for those three days. Amazingly, I knew that once I got to the program my drinking would be over. p. 483 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Now, what about the rest of the Twelfth Step? The wonderful energy it releases and the eager action by which it carries our message to the next suffering alcoholic and which finally translates the Twelve Steps into action upon all our affairs is the payoff, the magnificent reality, of Alcoholics Anonymous. p. 109 ************************************************** ********* A truly great person is the one who gives you a chance. --Paul Duffy We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. --Frederick Keonig The surest way to drive out the darkness is to bring in the light. --unknown "All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them." --Walt Disney "History has demonstrated that the most notable winners usually encountered heartbreaking obstacles before they triumphed. They won because they refused to become discouraged by their defeats." --B. C. Forbes Serenity isn't freedom from the storm; it is peace within the storm. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation ENJOYMENT "All animals, except man, know that the ultimate of life is to enjoy it." -- Samuel Butler Today I choose to enjoy my life. Regardless of the problem and difficulties that this day will bring, I have an inner joy that comes with my recovery from addiction. With a clear head and body free from drugs and chemicals I can face today and look forward to tomorrow. My life is to be enjoyed not endured. My worst days today are better than my best days as an addict. Spiritually I am free because I have begun to discover me. God can now be perceived in His world because I have sobriety. Lord of all play, I dance before You in my world and I can stop to smell the roses. ************************************************** ********* Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD; let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation." Psalm 95:1 And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. Romans 8:28 "God is able to do far more than we would dare to ask or even dream of - infinitely beyond our highest prayers, desires, thoughts, or hopes." Ephesians 3:20 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you are able to accept the hand of love that God extends to you, you will be able to free yourself of fears and show the full beauty of your inner spirit. Lord, we all suffer from weaknesses of one kind or another, so in our moments of strength, we ask that we may offer help, not judgment, to those who need it. Take less for granted and you will become very busy enjoying all that you have. Lord, thank you for my blessings and for all those that I am able to share them with. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Calling A Defect A Defect "When we see how our defects exist in our lives and accept them, we can let go of them and get on with our new life." Basic Text pg. 33-34 Sometimes our readiness to have our character defects removed depends on what we call them. If misnaming our defects makes them seem less "defective" we may be unable to see the damage they cause. And if they seem to be causing no harm, why would we ever ask our Higher Power to remove them from our lives? Take "people pleasing" for example. Doesn't really sound all that bad, does it? It just means we're nice to people, right? Not quite. To put it bluntly, it means we're dishonest and manipulative. We lie about our feelings, our beliefs, and our needs, trying to soothe others into compliance with our wishes. Or perhaps we think we're "easygoing." But does "easygoing" mean we ignore our housework, avoid confrontations, and stay put in a comfortable rut? Then a better name for it would be "laziness" or "procrastination" or "fear." Many of us have trouble identifying our character defects. If this is the case for us, we can talk with our sponsor or our NA friends. We clearly and honestly describe our behavior to them and ask for their help in identifying our defects. As time passes, we'll become progressively better able to identify our own character defects, calling them by their true names. Just for today: I will call my defects by their true names. If I have trouble doing this, I will ask my sponsor for help. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. If you must love your neighbor as yourself, it is at least as fair to love yourself as your neighbor. --Nicholas De Chamfort We sometimes find it difficult to accept a compliment. We may feel we don't deserve such attention, and point out reasons why the compliment is untrue. When we act this way, we show a lack of love for ourselves. God teaches us to love our neighbors as ourselves. Yet, before we can love anyone, we must believe we are worthy of the same love. No creature is undeserving of love, God reminds us of that. We can stop hiding behind feelings of unworthiness. There's nothing stopping us but ourselves. Sometimes it takes courage to say thank you when we get a compliment. Let's exercise that courage, and each time we do, we'll find our self-love growing. When I thank people today, will I have the courage to smile, too? You are reading from the book Touchstones. There are two equally dangerous extremes - to shut reason out, and to let nothing else in. --Pascal Some of the greatest scientific thinkers deeply respect the nonrational, and they aren't afraid to say so. Perhaps it is part of their genius. The nonrational inspires fun, creativity, a connection with others, and a feeling of reverence. Trying to contain our thoughts within reasonableness squeezes the life out of them. The simple beauty of color and form in a stone; the graceful, synchronized movement of a flock of birds; the miracle of understanding and loyalty in a friendship - these are truths beyond our ownership. We can feel these truths. We can be moved and inspired by them. We can never fully know their mysteries. Our addictive natures have led us men to overemphasize reason and the control it promises. We've become reasonable while discarding the less controlled, creative, humorous, mysterious, and personal aspects of our lives. At this very moment we may be so focused on figuring out the reasonable answer to a problem that we are blocking the gut message, which is also here for us. I can appreciate rather than understand the mystery of life. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. I have found that sitting in a place where you have never sat before can be inspiring. --Dodie Smith Repeatedly, today and every day, we will be in new situations, new settings with old friends, and old settings and situations with new friends. Each instance is fresh, unlike all the times before. And inspiration can accompany each moment, if we but recognize how special it is. "We will not pass this way again," so the song says, which heightens the meaning of each encounter, every experience. Acknowledging that something can be gained each step along the way invites inspiration. Inspiration moves us to new heights. We will be called to step beyond our present boundaries. Maybe today. Whenever the inspiration catches our attention, we can trust its invitation; we are ready for the challenge it offers. We need not let our narrow, personal expectations of an experience, a new situation perhaps, prevent us from being open to all the dynamic possibilities it offers. I must be willing to let my whole self be moved, inspired. I must be willing to let each moment I experience be the only moment getting my attention. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Valuing Our Needs When we don't ask for what we want and need, we discount ourselves. We deserve better. Maybe others taught us it wasn't polite or appropriate to speak up for ourselves. The truth is, if we don't, our unmet wants and needs may ultimately come back to haunt our relationships. We may end up feeling angry or resentful, or we may begin to punish someone else for not guessing what we need. We may end the relationship because it doesn't meet our needs. Intimacy and closeness are only possible in a relationship when both people can say what they want and need. Sustained intimacy demands this. Sometimes, we may even have to demand what we want. That's called setting a boundary. We do this not to control another person, but to gain control of our life. Our attitude toward our needs is important too. We must value them and take them seriously if we expect others to take us seriously. When we begin to place value and importance on our needs we'll see a remarkable change. Our wants and needs will begin to get met. Today, I will respect the wants and needs of others and myself. I will tell others, my Higher Power, and myself what I want and need. I will listen to what they want and need too. It feels so good to accept myself just as I am today. All my thoughts and actions and emotions are right where they belong. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Don’t Pick Up Energy That’s Not Yours I walked into the small-town diner and sat down at the counter. I was the only customer, but the waitress ignored me. I waited while she sat in a booth, reading the paper. Finally, she lowered the paper. “Is there something you want?” she barked from across the room. By the time I left the restaurant, I felt as crabby as the waitress appeared. It took a while to figure out what happened, what had changed my mood. Then I realized I had picked up her negative energy– feelings that had nothing to do with me. It was like someone had splashed my windshield with mud. Most of us have crabby days and an adundance of our own feelings to deal with. We don’t need to let others splash their negative energy on us. We don’t need to pick it up and carry it around. If someone splashes your windshield with mud while you’re driving down the road, what do you do? You wash it off and go on your way. Learn to tell when what you’re feeling is your emotions, and your business. Learn to tell when someone has splashed on you. You don’t have to take responsibility for what’s not yours. Be done with it as quickly as possible. Thoughts are energy. Crabby thoughts and crabby emotions can be like mud. If someone splashes on you, wash off your windshield, send them a blessing, and go on down the road. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Enjoy the ordinary Days before, there had been a tremendous storm out in the Pacific Ocean. Now the swells from the storm were smashing against the shore in California. The tide rose and rose. The house shook with each wave as the breaking water slammed into the pilings under the house. I went to bed but couldn’t sleep. I got up and walked outside to check on the kayak. It was still there, but the water was far up under the house, threatneing to grab the boat. I went back to bed and eventually drifted off to sleep in spite of the noisy, angry sea. The next day, the sea returned to normal. That night when I went to bed, the gentle rolling of the sea lulled me to sleep. Soon, I forgot about the storm, how loud and angry the waves had been. I once again began to take the gentle soothing sound of the surf for granted. It’s easy to take many things in our life for granted: health, the presence of a loved one in our life, friends, food, even sobriety and recovery. When life proceeds smoothly, it’s easy to take the ordinary for granted. Look at the ordinary in your life. How would you feel if it was taken away? Don’t just be grateful for successes. Be grateful for and celebrate the ordinary in your world. God, help me to not take anything for granted. Teach me to recognize, appreciate, and celebrate the ordinary in this world. Help me see how beautiful and meaningful the ordinary really is. *************************************** The Joy Of Being Celebrating The In-Between Times While celebrations are intended to honor life’s more momentous occasions, much of real life tends to happen during the in-between times. While moving from one moment in time to the next is seldom considered a significant occurrence, it is during those in-between times that we are most in tune with life’s most profound, albeit simple joys. Between birth and death, triumph and sorrow, beginnings and endings, we enjoy innumerable experiences that often happen unnoticed. These times are just as worthy of celebration. The in-between times are seldom about landmark moments. How you choose to celebrate them or which moments you choose to celebrate is up to you. You may want to celebrate the simple facts that you are alive and that every day is a chance to spend time with the people you care about or do the work that you love. Then again, when you look at the good that exists in your life, many reasons for celebrating the in-between times may become clear: a cup of your favorite tea, a beautiful sunrise, a good book, and the smell of fresh air can be reasons for celebration. Celebrating the in-between times can be as easy as paying special attention to them when they do happen, rather than taking them for granted. It’s your focus of attention that can turn an in-between time into a celebration. You can also pay homage to the in-between times by slowing down and allowing yourself time to look around and allow your heart and mind to take in all of your life’s wonders. Far too often, we can let those simple moments of awe pass us by. The in-between times are when life happens to us between the pauses that we take to honor our milestones occasions. Without the in-between times, there would be no big moments to celebrate. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day We often see people in The Program — devoutly and with seeming sincerity — ask for God’s guidance on matters ranging from major crises to such insignificant things as what to serve at a dinner party. Though they may be well-intentioned, such people tend to force their wills into all sorts of situations — with the comfortable assurance that they’re following God’s specific directions. In reality, this sort of prayer is nothing more than a self0serving demand of God for “replies;” it has little to do with The Program’s suggested Eleventh Step. Do I strive regularly to study each of the Steps, and to practice them in all my affairs? Today I Pray May I not make the common mistake of listing my own solutions for God and then asking for a stamp of Divine approval. May I catch myself if I am not really opening my mind to Gods guidance, but merely laying out my own answers with a “what do You think of these?” attitude. Today I Will Remember Am I looking for Gods rubber stamp? *************************************** One More Day There are some remedies worse than the disease. – Publilius Syrus Sometimes the very medicines prescribed to help us return to a more stable health situation can cause side effects which can be nearly intolerable. How ludicrous that a drug intended to help us shake off the exhaustion caused by a chronic health condition can cause fatigue. What a joke on us that a pill taken for arthritics, for example, can cause other potential medical problems. Despite these side effects, we should not stop following dosage instructions until we talk with our doctors, who can help minimize the side effects. In this way we will gain one more foothold in the process of learning to live with our problems. I ‘ll try to keep communication lines open with my doctor to make it as easy as possible upon myself. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ ENOUGH ~ Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies; Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. The Bible, Book of Psalms As a practicing compulsive overeater, I was obsessed with getting my "fair share" and stockpiling everything from food to friends. I was afraid there wouldn't be "enough" in the future. One of the Promises of the program states that "Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us." But just how can I calm down when the thought comes that there isn't enough, or that there won't be enough in the future? At a recent meeting, the speaker said that when he began to worry about his finances, he would ask himself, "Do I have enough money between now and the time I go to bed?" Since we're only alive in the moment, that's really the appropriate time frame. To me, that sounds like the best example of "One Day At A Time" thinking I've heard so far! Additionally, this could be applied to anything else I might worry about: "Do I have enough FOOD between now and bedtime?... enough LOVE?" You-fill-in-the-blank, because it isn't always just economic insecurity that haunts us! One Day at a Time . . . I'm learning to trust my Higher Power, which always supplies my needs. Whenever I start to worry, I can ask myself if I have enough to last between now and the time I go to bed, and cultivate trust and appreciation for the gifts I receive daily. Marilyn ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The man in the bed was told of the acute poisoning from which he suffered, how it deteriorates the body of an alcoholic and warps his mind. There was much talk about the mental state preceding the first drink. 'Yes, that's me,' said the sick man, 'the very image. You fellows know your stuff all right, but I don't see what good it'll do. You fellows are somebody. I was once, but I'm a nobody now. From what you tell me, I know more than ever I can't stop.' At this both the visitors burst into a laugh. Said the future Fellow Anonymous: '**** little to laugh about that I can see.' The two friends spoke of their spiritual experience and told him about the course of action they carried out. - Pg. 157 - A Vision For You Hour To Hour - Book - Quote In the first days and months of recovery we must practice a strict adherence to our program suggestions. We are vulnerable to our addiction calling us back. But if we follow the suggestions religiously, we will earn our 30 day, 90 day, 1 year chip. God, as I understand You, help me stay clean and sober to the next hour. Spirit Calls I am willing to allow my life to happen. Life has taught me that the best laid plans can go awry. I know that I need to have goals and missions in order to give shape, meaning and a sense of destiny to my life. However, when I let those goals run me, when I let them preoccupy me to such an extent that I stop living in the present and I miss the beauty and spontaneity of each new day, then I am becoming a slave to my own plans. I will learn to take an action and let go of the result, to have a goal then to move toward it in a relaxed manner that doesn't rob me of my pleasure and my day. I am in touch with spirit within and without - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Some people do not have to have a program to stop drinking and using. But for us, we remember untreated abstinence will make our past our future. I don't work the program to get my life back; I work the program to get my life forward. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Serenity comes when you stop expecting and start accepting. Time for Joy - Book - Quote It feels so good to accept myself just as I am today. All my thoughts and actions and emotions are right where they belong. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Other drugs; I never stopped doing one thing to do something else, I just kinda 'added to'. - Allen F. |
December 9
Daily Reflections LOVE WITH NO PRICE TAG When the Twelfth Step is seen in its full implication, it is really talking about the kind of love that has no price tag on it. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 106 In order for me to start working the Twelfth Step, I had to work on sincerity, honesty, and to learn to act with humility. Carrying the message is a gift of myself, no matter how many years of sobriety I may have accumulated. My dreams can become reality. I solidify my sobriety by sharing what I have received freely. As I look back to that time when I began my recovery, there was already a seed of hope that I could help another drunk pull himself out of his alcoholic mire. My wish to help another drunk is the key to my spiritual health. But I never forget that God acts through me. I am only His instrument. Even if the other person is not ready, there is success, because my effort in his behalf has helped me to remain sober and to become stronger. To act, to never grow weary in my Twelfth Step work, is the key. If I am capable of laughing today, let me not forget those days when I cried. God reminds me that I can feel compassion! ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The way of A.A. is the way of fellowship. We have read a good deal about fellowship and yet it is such an important part of the A.A. program that it seems that we cannot think too much about it. Human beings were not meant to live alone. A hermit's life is not a normal or natural one. We all need to be by ourselves at times, but we cannot really live without the companionship of others. Our natures demand it. Our lives depend largely upon it. The fellowship of A.A. seems to us to be the best in the world. Do I fully appreciate what the fellowship of A.A. means to me? Meditation For The Day We are all seeking something, but many do not know what they want in life. They are seeking something because they are restless and dissatisfied, without realizing that faith in God can give an objective and a purpose for their lives. Many of us are at least subconsciously seeking for a Power greater than ourselves because that would give a meaning to our existence. If you have found that Higher Power, you can be the means of leading others aright, by showing them that their search for a meaning to life will end when they find faith and trust in God as the answer. Prayer For The Day I pray that my soul will lose its restlessness by finding rest in God. I pray that I may find peace of mind in the thought of God and His purpose for my life. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Carrying the Message, p. 192 The wonderful energy the Twelfth Step releases, by which it carries our message to the next suffering alcoholic and finally translates the Twelve Steps into action upon all our affairs, is the payoff, the magnificent reality of A.A. ******************************** Never talk down to an alcoholic from any moral or spiritual hilltop; simply lay out the kit of spiritual tools for his inspection. Show him how they worked with you. Offer him friendship and fellowship. 1. 12 & 12, p. 109 2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 95 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Fixing things that aren't broken Self-acceptance. At the beginning of our AA sobriety, we were reminded that we were not reformers. Yet we sometimes have a tendency to want to "reform" ourselves or others after we've established sobriety. This can become a practice of "fixing things that aren't broken". We may not realize it, but many things in our lives and personalities were always all right, all along. In believing that we should be changed, we may be taking on the opinions of someone else. There might be no need for change at all. We also may be trying to please people who disapproved of us. Perhaps we're trying to obtain the affection of a parent who always rejected us. But if we're already on a spiritual path and are living rightly, there's no need for change. We'd be trying to fix something that isn't broken. I'll accept myself and others as we are today. We are not out to reform anyone, including ourselves. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple There is no stronger bond of friendship than a mutual enemy.--Frankfort Moore. A.A. is a fellowship united against the same enemy--alcoholism. Our bonds give us strength to recover. We may not even know each other's last name, but we'll do anything to help each other stay sober. Our illness has taken much. But it has also given us much. We have millions of new friends. Almost anywhere in the world, we can find a member of our fellowship. Our new way of life depends on the strength of the fellowship. We should do nothing to weaken it. When you don't feel like going to a meeting--go, not only for yourself but for the sake of the fellowship. It truly needs you. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You have given me A. A. Now help me to keep it going. A.A. needs me, just as I need A.A. Help me give even when I don't want to. Action for the Day: Today, I'll give back to the program. I'll call a new member, volunteer to put on a meeting, or make the coffee." ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning To do nothing is failure. To try, and in the trying you make some mistakes and then you make some positive changes as a result of those mistakes, is to learn and to grow and to blossom. --Darlene Larson Jenks Life is a process, one that is continuously changing. And with each change, we are offered unexpected opportunities for growth. Change is what fosters our development as women. It encourages us to risk new behavior and may even result in some mistakes. Fortunately, no mistakes can seriously hinder us. In fact, most mistakes give us an additional opportunity to learn. Where we stand today is far removed from our position last year, or even last week. Each and every moment offers us new input that influences any decision from this moment forward. The process that we're participating in guarantees our growth as long as we remain conscious of our opportunities and willingly respond to them. We can be glad that the life process is, in fact, never static. always moving, always inviting us to participate fully. I will have the courage to make a mistake today. It's a promise of growth. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. we relax and take it easy. We don’t struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while. What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind. Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times. We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideas. Nevertheless, we find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration. We come to rely upon it. pp. 86-87 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. One of my daughters drove me to the program and helped me fill out the paperwork. I almost fell down going into the building. My hallucinations began again, and the staff moved me to a room with a padded floor they called the TV room. I began to think I was in prison and these guys wanted to kill me. When they opened the door to the room, I ran for a window down the hall, thinking I would escape. They grabbed me, afraid I would try to jump through it. I kept hitting my shoulder against the wall trying to break out and picked at the nails with my fingertips until they were raw. The staff called the sheriff's department, and it took three deputies, two counselors, and two nurses to hold me down and give me a shot. Finally I lay there quietly, ready to die like a man. p. 483 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Even the newest of newcomers finds undreamed rewards as he tries to help his brother alcoholic, the one who is even blinder than he. This is indeed the kind of giving that actually demands nothing. He does not expect his brother sufferer to pay him, or even to love him. And then he discovers that by the divine paradox of this kind of giving he has found his own reward, whether his brother has yet received anything or not. His own character may still be gravely defective, but he somehow knows that God has enabled him to make a mighty beginning, and he senses that he stands at the edge of new mysteries, joys, and experiences of which he had never even dreamed. pp. 109-110 ************************************************** ********* "The craving to find serenity utterly evaporated--and in its place there was serenity. I'd been looking out there for what was right here." --A.A. Grapevine, December, 2000, p. 49 Most of us are just about as happy as we make up our minds to be. --Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865) No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. --Eleanor Roosevelt The minute a man ceases to grow, no matter what his years, that minute he begins to be old. --William James The way you see things and the way others see things may not be the same. Be tolerant of other people's views. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation OLD "Growing old isn't so bad when you consider the alternative." -- Maurice Chevalier What is the alternative? Not to change! To stay rooted in adolescence, youth, middle-age or whatever. Not to age is not to live, not to experience and not to grow spiritually. An aspect of age, for which I am beginning to be grateful, is "comparison"; today I am able to look at the past and see the benefits of the present. Growth is measurable only through the tunnel of age. I suppose my fear of age is my basic fear of the "unknown" ; fear of "unmanageability" and "powerlessness". These words remind me of the spiritual program that teaches me to confidently place my life in the loving arms of God. If I am responsible in life, I will be responsible in old age. Teach me to use the spiritual perspective that comes with the gift of age. ************************************************** ********* In you, O LORD, I have taken refuge; let me never be put to shame. Rescue me and deliver me in your righteousness; turn your ear to me and save me. Be my rock of refuge, to which I can always go; give the command to save me, for you are my rock and my fortress. Deliver me, O my God, from the hand of the wicked, from the grasp of evil and cruel men. For you have been my hope, O Sovereign LORD, my confidence since my youth. Psalms 71:1-5 "See how great a love the Father has bestowed upon us, that we should be called children of God; and such we are." 1 John 3:1 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Do not waste any time disliking who you are because of something you can no longer do anything about. Lord, help me to forgive myself all shortcomings of the past that I still hold on to and rather make the very best of this moment. We never really know how far reaching our influence will be. Lord, may Your loving kindness always flow through me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Listening "This ability to listen is a gift and grows as we grow spiritually. Life takes on a new meaning when we open ourselves to this gift." Basic Text pg. 102 Have you ever watched two small children carry on a conversation? One will be talking about purple dragons while the other carries on about the discomfort caused by having sand in one's shoes. We sometimes encounter the same communication problems as we learn to listen to others. We may struggle through meetings, trying desperately to hear the person sharing while our minds are busy planning what we will say when it's our turn to speak. In conversation, we may suddenly realize that our answers have nothing to do with the questions we're being asked. They are, instead, speeches prepared while in the grip of our self-obsession. Learning how to listen - really listen - is a difficult task, but one that's not beyond our reach. We might begin by acknowledging in our replies what our conversational partner is saying. We might ask if there is anything we can do to help when someone expresses a problem. With a little practice, we can find greater freedom from self-obsession and closer contact with the people in our lives. Just for today: I will quiet my own thoughts and listen to what someone else is saying. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Faith is the seamstress who mends our torn belief who sews the hem of childhood trust and clips the threads of grief. --Joan Walsh Anglund A seamstress takes large pieces of material and cuts them to size. Then, with the help of needle and thread and buttons, she goes to work to create a finished piece. Sometimes, in the beginning, it is hard to imagine a finished product. But the seamstress believes it is possible and goes to work on it. Faith is like a seamstress. Faith is what can pull all the unfinished pieces of life into some sort of order. Faith is what lets us know we are all right even when life doesn't seem to make sense. We all need the faith to believe our skills and dreams, and even our heartaches can be sewn into a shape that is beautiful and useful. Our faith is the seamstress who guides the needle, mends the tears, and helps create a shape and meaning to our lives. How can I show my faith today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. That it will never come again is what makes life so sweet. --Emily Dickinson Life seems to be a continuous pattern of getting committed to things and having to let go - falling in love and losing the one we love, developing a job skill and having to change careers, caring for our children and letting them go off into the world. This is the rhythm of life, and our spiritual growth teaches us to make peace with it. Participating fully in the rhythm is how we become whole men. As addicts and codependents, we used our gambling, overspending, drugs, sex, work, or caretaking of others to avoid the pain of making deeper relationships and to avoid the grief over losing them. Avoiding commitments and staying uninvolved may keep us safe from risks. They also keep us near our dangerous old patterns. Our program works when we can freely let ourselves go. First, we commit to our recovery program with no reservations. Then, in our increasing sanity we gradually let ourselves go in other attachments. We know we face losses as part of life. We will have the strength to grieve them and move on. God, give me the inner-liberty today to let go of myself and care. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. To do nothing is failure. To try, and in the trying you make some mistakes and then you make some positive changes as a result of those mistakes, is to learn and to grow and to blossom. --Darlene Larson Jenks Life is a process, one that is continuously changing. And with each change, we are offered unexpected opportunities for growth. Change is what fosters our development as women. It encourages us to risk new behavior and may even result in some mistakes. Fortunately, no mistakes can seriously hinder us. In fact, most mistakes give us an additional opportunity to learn. Where we stand today is far removed from our position last year, or even last week. Each and every moment offers us new input that influences any decision from this moment forward. The process that we're participating in guarantees our growth as long as we remain conscious of our opportunities and willingly respond to them. We can be glad that the life process is, in fact, never static. always moving, always inviting us to participate fully. I will have the courage to make a mistake today. It's a promise of growth. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Asking for Help It's okay to ask for help. One of the most absurd things we do to ourselves is not asking for the help we need from a friend, a family member, our Higher Power, or the appropriate resource. We don't have to struggle through feelings and problems alone. We can ask for help from our Higher Power and for support and encouragement from our friends. Whether what we need is information, encouragement, a hand, a word, a hug, someone who will listen, or a ride, we can ask. We can ask people for what we need from them. We can ask God for what we need from God. It is self-defeating to not ask for the help we need. It keeps us stuck. If we ask long and hard enough, if we direct our request to the right source, we'll get the help we need. There is a difference between asking someone to rescue us and asking someone in a direct manner for the help we need from him or her. We can be straightforward and let others choose whether to help us or not. If the answer is no, we can deal with that. It is self-defeating to hint, whine, manipulate, or coerce help out of people. It is annoying to go to people as a victim and expect them to rescue us. It is healthy to ask for help when help is what we need. "My problem is shame," said one woman. "I wanted to ask for help in dealing with it, but I was to ashamed. Isn't that crazy?" We who are eager to help others can learn to allow ourselves to receive help. We can learn to make clean contracts about asking for and receiving the help we want and need. Today, I will ask for help if I need it - from people and my Higher Power. I will not be a victim, helplessly waiting to be rescued. I will make my request for help specific, to the point, and I will leave room for the person to choose whether or not to help me. I will not be a martyr any longer by refusing to get the help I deserve in life - the help that makes life simpler. God, help me let go of my need to do everything alone. Help me use the vast Universe of resources available to me. I have the right to have my needs met. In order to have them met, I am expressing them to the people who can help me today. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Claim Your Own Life Claiming our own lives creates fulfillment and joy. We don’t need to be controlled. We don’t deserve to be repressed or stifled. We don’t have to let anyone convince us that we do. We can trust ourselves. We know what we need, we know what we yearn for– we long to be set free. What once seemed so overwhelming– creating and taking responsibility for our lives– wasn’t really so. It was our belief that we couldn’t do it, couldn’t handle it, couldn’t be trusted that made it so. We created our own prison by believing we were trapped, stuck. We became controlled by believing others knew better than we did what was best for us. We were afraid to take responsibility for our choices, so we gave up our power. Now it’s time to step out, leave our prison of fear. We can take responsibility for our lives. We can take responsibility for what we create. We don’t have to be afraid of making a mistake or doing something wrong. If we create a situation we don’t like, we can create something different. We’re free to create the life we want. We’re free now to claim our own lives and create fulfillment and joy. We always have been. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Discover a sense of wonder and awe After lunch at Paradise Cove, one of our favorite places to eat, my friend and I went for a walk along the beach. Suddenly he bent down and picked up a little purple ball with spines all over it. “Look,” he said, “a sea urchin!” It was just an empty shell, but the purple was glowing, almost the color of amethyst. Neither of us had ever seen an urchin lying on the beach before. We touched it and debated whether we should take it home and put it on a shelf. “Why don’t we leave it here,” he said. “Some kids will find it, and they can take it home. We’ve got enough stuff lying around.” As soon as he put the treasure back on the sand, two children and their mother rounded the point in front of us. The oldest child, a girl about twelve, was curious and delighted when we called her over and handed her the little purple ball. Soon her brother and her mom crowded around. The boy couldn’t wait to touch the urchin’s tiny spines. My friend and I were both smiling as we walked back to the car. Two of the sweetest experiences in life are discovering new things and sharing those things with someone else. Be aware of the new and exciting things that come into your life. They don’t have to be that big to give you a sense of delight. Enjoy them, learn from them, play with them. And then, for an even greater experience, share them with a friend. God, help me discover a sense of wonder and awe about life. Then help me pass that feeling on to someone else. *************************************** Let It Flow Tears How wonderful it feels to give in and let tears flow when we are overwhelmed with emotions, whether we are happy or sad. Tears come from the soul, from our well of feelings rising from deep down. When we give in to the prickling behind our eyes and the lump in our throat to let teardrops fall from our eyes, we allow our feelings to surface so they can be set free. Proud parents shed tears of pride in a child’s accomplishments, a baby’s first step, birthdays, and graduations. Long lost friends fall into each other’s arms, tears rolling down their cheeks when they reunite after years of separation. Tears may flow from us when we are witness to a commitment being made at a wedding or even while we are watching a love story. Tears of relief may spring forth from our eyes when we hear that a loved one has survived an ordeal, and tears may fall when we bow our head in sorrow over a loss or death. Tears born from heartache can flow like they’ll never cease, whether our tears are for a love that is over, a friendship lost, or an opportunity missed. We shed tears because of disappointment in ourselves, tragedy in the world, pain, and illness. Tears of anger can burn with emotion as they fall down our faces. Tears offer us a physical release of our feelings. Shedding tears can sometimes make us feel better, although it can feel like the tears will never end once the floodgates are open. There is no shame in letting tears flow freely and frequently. Tears are as natural to us as is breathing. There is beauty in allowing yourself to be vulnerable enough to shed tears. Open up, release your tears, and let your feelings flow. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “Difficulties are God’s errands, and when we are sent upon them, we should esteem it a proof of God’s confidence.” –Beecher I’ve come to realize that my past troubles were really of my own making. Although I hardly thought so at the time, I was a primary example of what The Program calls “self-will run riot.” Today, I’ll accept my difficulties as sign posts to growth, and as evidence of God’s confidence in me. Do I believe that God will never give me more than I can handle? Today I Pray May I believe strongly that God has confidence in me to handle my troubles, that the difficulties I must face are in direct proportion to my strength and ability to bear up and keep a cool head in a crisis. May I also understand that it is my faith in God which keeps me from crumbling. Today I Will Remember God has faith in me, because I have faith in God. *************************************** One More Day To see the goal of life as “winning” forces us to see other people as competitores, threats to our happiness. For us to “win,” they have to “lose.” – Harold Kushner Our thinking is healthier when we see our goals as individual accomplishments, not as outdoing someone else. Others don’t have to get less or be less in order for us to feel good about ourselves. Rather than, “I beat someone out of a job,” we need to understand that it’s not a contest, but a matter of placing the most qualifeied person in a new position. We all have different skills, and it is usually the skill, not the person, that is recognized or rewarded. The person who possesses the needed skill is not necessarily better, nicer, or more worthwhile — even when that person is us. In accepting that, we are better able to work toward our persoanal goals without fear of competion. The only winning I pursue is meeting my goals. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ LIFE ~ Life is the movie you see through your own unique eyes. It makes little difference what's happening out there. It's how you take it that counts. Dennis Waitley in "The Winner's Edge" Life is a very precious resource. Everyone has a different interpretation of reality, and people who are happier in life make the most of what they have been given, no matter how good or bad it may seem at the time. Everything happens for a reason. Although we may not understand something at first, we must seize the moment and make use of every single second that our Higher Power has blessed us with. Enjoy all the good times that you deserve, but remember to accept those down times for all the lessons that you will learn, too. It is important to remember the Serenity Prayer and keep on going. Make the most of each day but remember to stop and smell the flowers along the way. Today only happens once. One Day at a Time . . . Life is not a dress rehearsal, so have a good day, unless you have other plans. Natalie ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote To sum up about sex: We earnestly pray for the right ideal, for guidence in each questionable situation, for sanity, and for the strength to do the right thing. If sex is very troublesome, we throw ourselves the harder into helping others. We think of their needs and work for them. This takes us out of ourselves. It quiets the imperious urge, when to yield would mean heartache. - Pg. 70 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We need to have our spiritual program replenished daily, by going to meetings and practicing the principles we are learning. Sometimes we need to replenish hourly. We replenish through prayer and service. Thank you God, as I understand You, for the wealth of spiritual principles available for me to use. Transformation Count me in. Whatever are my talents, my usefulness; wherever you see me fitting into your grand scheme, God . . . place me there. I am willing to open my heart to your guidance. I am built to be part of this moment of transformation. I see a better world in my mind's eye and I know that others see it too. Connect me with those people who wish to quietly usher in a new world. Together we can push through the eye of the needle - together we can help it happen. We are transforming together - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Do not be hung up on what you ought to be, what you were supposed to be or what you were going to be. You will never have time to be what you are. I am the best me there is. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book When we go too far, it is seldom in the right direction. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I have the right to have my needs met. In order to have them met, I am expressing them to the people who can help me today. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Prayer is talking to God. Meditation is listening to Him. - Unknown origin. |
December 10
Daily Reflections CARRYING THE MESSAGE Now, what about the rest of the Twelfth Step? The wonderful energy it releases and the eager action by which it carries our message to the next suffering alcoholic and which finally translates the Twelve Steps into action upon all our affairs is the payoff, the magnificent reality, of Alcoholics Anonymous. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 109 To renounce the alcoholic world is not to abandon it, but to act upon principles I have come to love and cherish, and to restore in others who still suffer the serenity I have come to know. When I am truly committed to this purpose, it matters little what clothes I wear or how I make a living. My task is to carry the message, and to lead by example, not design. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Our drinking fellowship was a substitute one, for lack of something better. At the time, we did not realize what real fellowship could be. Drinking fellowship has a fatal fault. It is not based on a firm foundation. Most of it is on the surface. It is based mostly on the desire to use your companions for your own pleasure and using others is a false foundation. Drinking fellowship has been praised in song and story. The "cup that cheers" has become famous as a means of companionship. But we realize that the higher centers of our brains are dulled by alcohol and such fellowship cannot be on the highest plane. It is at best only a substitute. Do I see my drinking fellowship in its proper light? Meditation For The Day Set for yourself the task of growing daily more and more into the consciousness of a Higher Power. We must keep trying to improve our conscious contact with God. This is done by prayer, quiet times, and communion. Often all you need to do is sit silent before God and let Him speak to you through your thought. Try to think God's thoughts after Him. When the guidance comes, you must not hesitate, but go out and follow that guidance in your daily work, doing what you believe to be the right thing. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be still and know God is with me. I pray that I may open my mind to the leading of Divine Mind. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It True Tolerance, p. 203 Gradually we began to be able to accept the other fellow's sins as well as his virtues. We coined the potent and meaningful expression "Let us always love the best in others--and never fear their worst." ******************************** Finally, we begin to see that all people, including ourselves, are to some extent emotionally ill as well as frequently wrong. When this happens, we approach true tolerance and we see what real love for our fellows actually means. 1. Grapevine, January 1962 2. 12 & 12, p. 92 12 & 12, p. 65 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places HOW IMPORTANT IS IT? Good judgment. All of our lives, many of us had to deal with "tempests in a teapot." These were minor problems that we somehow magnified until they became disasters. Some of us also took refuge in the bottle when faced with problems. Remembering this with some guilt, we may feel a responsibility today to deal with every problem efficiently and promptly. This feeling might also create unnecessary anxiety. We can easily get to the heart of such matters by asking ourselves, "How Important is it?" We might be making something far more important than it really is. The importance of problems is revealed by our inability to remember what was upsetting us a week ago. Asking, "How important is it?" can be a useful test to avoid excessive worrying about any problem. I'll take a responsibility attitude today, but I'll watch myself for a tendency to go to pieces over things that really aren't important in the long run. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Kindness in giving creates love. --Lao-tzu. In our illness, we takers. Now, we've changed this around. We are now givers. Giving is a big part of recovery. Our word for it is service. Our program is based on care, respect, and service. Our program tells us to “practice these principles in all our affairs." No matter if it's getting to our meeting early to put on the coffee, or going on a Twelfth Step call, we are giving of ourselves. We give so that we know we can make a difference. We give so that we can know how to love better. The healing power of recovery is love. As we give love and kindness to others, we heal. Why? Because people grow by giving kindness and love to others. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power with Your help I'll be a kind and loving giver. I'll look for way to share Your kindness. Action for the Day: Today, I'll list five ways I can be of service to others. I'll put at least one of these ways into action today. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The forgiving state of mind is a magnetic power for attracting good. No good thing can be withheld from the forgiving state of mind. --Catherine Ponder Forgiveness fosters humility, which invites gratitude. And gratitude blesses us; it makes manifest greater happiness. The more grateful we feel for all aspects of our lives, the greater will be our rewards. We don't recognize the goodness of our lives until we practice gratitude. And gratitude comes easiest when we're in a forgiving state of mind. Forgiveness should be an ongoing process. Attention to it daily will ease our relationships with others and encourage greater self-love. First on our list for forgiveness should be ourselves. Daily, we heap recriminations upon ourselves. And our lack of self-love hinders our ability to love others, which in turn affects our treatment of them. We've come full circle--and forgiveness is in order. It can free us. It will change our perceptions of life's events, and it promises greater happiness. The forgiving heart is magical. My whole life will undergo a dynamic change when I develop a forgiving heart. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems. We ask especially for freedom from self-will, and are careful to make no request for ourselves only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends. Many of us have wasted a lot of time doing that and it doesn’t work. You can easily see why. p. 87 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. It was three days later when I woke up, naked and stinking. They cleaned me up and I felt great. I'd never felt so good, like I'd never had a drink. I went to the treatment sessions and listened to everything that was said. They took us out to A.A. meetings. I wanted what the A.A.'s had. I don't think I ever wanted anything as much as I wanted the program. I saw men dressed in suits in those days, looking good. That's how I wanted to be. The thought of a drink has not entered my mind since. I've thought of doing some crazy things but never about taking a drink. To me sobriety is a gift from God to me. If I drank, it would be giving the gift back. If you return a gift, the person takes it back, right? If God takes it back, I'm dead. p. 484 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Practically every A.A. member declares that no satisfaction has been deeper and no joy greater than in a Twelfth Step job well done. To watch the eyes of men and women open with wonder as they move from darkness into light, to see their lives quickly fill with new purpose and meaning, to see whole families reassembled, to see the alcoholic outcast received back into his community in full citizenship, and above all to watch these people awaken to the presence of a loving God in their lives--these things are the substance of what we receive as we carry A.A.'s message to the next alcoholic. p. 110 ************************************************** ********* "If you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours". --SHASEC God, help me remember that when I admit and accept the truth, I'll be given the power and guidance to change. --Melody Beattie Keep your sobriety first, to make it last. --unknown Today, I will focus on what's right about me. I will give myself some of the caring I've extended to the world. --Melody Beattie Learn to Let Go. That is the key to happiness. --Buddha Worry is like a rocking chair -- it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation SERVICE "There is no higher religion than human service. To work for the common good is the greatest creed." -- Albert Schweitzer I enjoy doing things for other people. I enjoy seeing other people happy, seeing gratitude in their eyes and experiencing their hug of thankfulness. Some people need to restrict how much they do for others and begin doing more for themselves but I am happy and pleased with my service towards others. Why? Because I used to be a "taker". For years I would walk away with all that you could give me and only thank you because I wanted to return for more! In sobriety I am beginning to change this. Now I am giving and I am enjoying it. Lord, the gift of service is a precious gift. ************************************************** ********* "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied." Matthew 5:6 I honor and love your commands. I meditate on your principles. Remember your promise to me, for it is my only hope. Your promise revives me; it comforts me in all my troubles." Psalm 119:48-50 Sing to him, sing praise to him; tell of all his wonderful acts. Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice. Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always. 1 Chronicles 16:9-11 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration A blessing is an explosion of joy from God that ripples through your heart and fills your mind with God's light and hope. Lord, help me speak the words of blessing when they are needed by someone who is lonely, or who is dying or who is depressed. As you draw closer and closer to God, you won't have to tell anyone because it will show in your face. Lord, teach me Your ways as I am ready and let Your love and peace flow through me even in my difficult moments. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Winners "I started to imitate some of the things the winners were doing. I got caught up in NA. I felt good...." Basic Text pg. 223 We often hear it said in meetings that we should "stick with the winners." Who are the winners in Narcotics Anonymous? Winners are easily identified. They work an active program of recovery, living in the solution and staying out of the problem. Winners are always ready to reach their hands out to the newcomer. They have sponsors and work with those sponsors. Winners stay clean, just for today. Winners are recovering addicts who keep a positive frame of mind. They may be going through troubled times, but they still attend meetings and share openly about it. Winners know in their hearts that, with the help of a Higher Power, nothing will come along that is too much to handle. Winners strive for unity in their service efforts. Winners practice putting "principles before personalities." Winners remember the principle of anonymity, doing the principled action no matter who is involved. Winners keep a sense of humor. Winners have the ability to laugh at themselves. And when winners laugh, they laugh with you, not at you. Who are the winners in Narcotics Anonymous? Any one of us can be considered a winner. All of us exhibit some of the traits of the winner; sometimes we come very close to the ideal, sometimes we don't. If we are clean today and working our program to the best of our ability, we are winners! Just for today: I will strive to fulfill my ideals. I will be a winner. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. She must learn to speak starting with I starting with We starting as the infant does with her own true hunger and pleasure and rage. --Marge Piercy Once there was a writer who was writing a book for children. He decided to ask his son for ideas. "What would you like to tell other children?" he asked. He thought the boy would say something like, "Everybody love everybody." But instead the boy said, "Number one, ignore what your parents say about nutritious food. Number two, don't go to school." The father laughed and thanked the boy for his ideas, even though they weren't what he expected. He loved his son for being able to feel and express his desires so strongly. We all have a child within us, no matter how old we are. When we honor that child, we also honor who we have become, and we free ourselves to express our truest feelings. What does the child within me want to do today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. If you can just observe what you are and move with it, then you will find that it is possible to go infinitely far. --J. Krishnamurti "Boys don't cry" is bad training for males. Worse than that were ideas like, "Don't pass up a dare," "Nice guys finish last," "Be a good provider," "Be aggressive." Some of these ideas have some value, but problems came from adopting them as the only way to be. We thought we had to work at being the strongest, the best, the least vulnerable. Now we are learning how weak and fragile such thinking actually makes men. It sets us up to go to the extremes we found in our addictions and codependency. Weakness isn't the alternative to this thinking. Developing our spiritual side, we see that we don't have to work at being what we already are. A man can be strong enough to show his vulnerability. He can choose the opportunity to advance a relationship with his child over the opportunity to advance his career. He can choose to pass by a challenge without shame because he doesn't wish to spend his energy there. I will be stronger today by simply allowing myself to be true to my feelings. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. The forgiving state of mind is a magnetic power for attracting good. No good thing can be withheld from the forgiving state of mind. --Catherine Ponder Forgiveness fosters humility, which invites gratitude. And gratitude blesses us; it makes manifest greater happiness. The more grateful we feel for all aspects of our lives, the greater will be our rewards. We don't recognize the goodness of our lives until we practice gratitude. And gratitude comes easiest when we're in a forgiving state of mind. Forgiveness should be an ongoing process. Attention to it daily will ease our relationships with others and encourage greater self-love. First on our list for forgiveness should be ourselves. Daily, we heap recriminations upon ourselves. And our lack of self-love hinders our ability to love others, which in turn affects our treatment of them. We've come full circle--and forgiveness is in order. It can free us. It will change our perceptions of life's events, and it promises greater happiness. The forgiving heart is magical. My whole life will undergo a dynamic change when I develop a forgiving heart. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Empowerment You can think. You can make good decisions. You can make choices that are right for you. Yes, we all make mistakes from time to time. But we are not mistakes. We can make a new decision that takes new information into account. We can change our mind from time to time. That's our right too. We don't have to be intellectuals to make good choices. In recovery, we have a gift and a goal available to each of us. The gift is called wisdom. Other people can think too. And that means we no longer have to feel responsible for other people's decisions. That also means we are responsible for our choices. We can reach out to others for feedback. We can ask for information. We can take opinions into account. But it is our task to make our own decisions. It is our pleasure and right to have our own opinions. We are each free to embrace and enjoy the treasure of our own mind, intellect, and wisdom. Today, I will treasure the gift of my mind. I will do my own thinking, make my own choices, and value my opinions. I will be open to what others think, but I will take responsibility for myself. I will ask for and trust that the Divine Wisdom is guiding me. Today I trust the positive and loving people to whom I am attracted. Today I am free to share from my heart, knowing that what I say will be treated with love and respect. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Heal from Past Betrayals Healing from betrayal is connected to healing and opening the heart. Many of us have become quite skillful at denying feelings of betrayal, ignoring those situations when we not only feel betrayed, we truly have been betrayed. Life happens. Sometimes people do things that hurt us. People may have let us down, not protected us. People may have deceived us. We live in a world with people who have a lot of issues. We live in a world that moves fast and isn’t always kind, just, or fair. We may be moving so fast that we gloss over situations where we have been betrayed. Things just weren’t right. The numbers don’t add up. If we haven’t dealt with past betrayals, if we haven’t cleansed and healed those break lines on the heart, we won’t be able to deal with the betrayals going on right now. The part of our hearts that’s sensitive to betrayal has been numbed, sometimes damaged, because it hasn’t been allowed to heal. We may stay in situations much longer than is good for us to do. We may not speak up when we need to. We may quietly stand there saying, That’s just how people are. And so our hearts break a little more and we go a little more numb. And that beautiful, precious part of ourselves, our heart, closes– not just to the person betraying us, but to all the beauty in life. Yes, sometimes, that’s just the way life is. But we don’t need to stand there and keep letting life do that. We can open our hearts by healing those break lines. We can keep it open by being vulnerable and safe enough to feel, express, and take whatever actions our heart leads us to when betrayal occurs. The head is connected to the heart. This connection is important. Healing betrayal will help keep that connection clear. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Become amazed at what you see We were on a trip through the Southwest when we turned around a bend in New Mexico. Lake Albiquiu, the sign said. The campground was seated on a bluff overlooking a large man-made lake. We decided it was so beautiful we’d camp there for the night. We selected just the right spot to give us the best view of the sun rising in the morning. We wanted to see the light hit the red rock cliffs in the distance. Hiking around the edge of the bluff, we found a tiny cactus bursting with bright red flowers sitting in the shade of a windblown tree. We sat for a while then scrambled down to the water and sat on a big rock that jutted out into the lake. We swam. The water was cold, but refreshing, and the early summer sun felt good on our skin. Later we cooked supper on the little gas stove. “Should we set up the tent?” I asked, eager to see the new tent set up in the wilderness. “The weather is nice,” my friend said. “Let’s just throw our bags on the ground and sleep out.” That was an idea! I had never slept under the stars before. We lay there in the gathering darkness and watched as one by one the stars softly glowed into view. I closed my eyes and dozed. Moments later, a bird sang a goodnight song from a nearby tree, and I opened my eyes to see a blanket of stars overhead. The Milky Way cut a path through the night sky, and there were so many unfamiliar stars that I could hardly distinguish the constellations I knew. I didn’t want to close my eyes, I didn’t want to miss a moment of this incredible sight. Camping in a state park may not count to some of the hard-core wilderness folks. But we each have different levels of freedom in our lives. Freedom means tasting new things, having new experiences, and pursuing our dreams no matter how small they might be. Recapture the magic of a time in your life when everything was new and amazing. Discover what’s possible for you. Then be amazed at what you see. God, give me a sense of the possible in my life. Then help me be amazed at just how beautiful life can be. *************************************** Reflections of Self We Are All Mirrors for Each Other When we look at other people, we see many of their qualities in innumerable and seemingly random combinations. However, the qualities that we see in the people around us are directly related to the traits that exist in us. "Like attracts like" is one of the spiritual laws of the universe. We attract individuals into our lives that mirror who we are. Those you feel drawn to reflect your inner self back at you, and you act as a mirror for them. Simply put, when you look at others, you will likely see what exists in you. When you see beauty, divinity, sweetness, or light in the soul of another, you are seeing the goodness that resides in your soul. When you see traits in others that evoke feelings of anger, annoyance, or hatred, you may be seeing reflected back at you those parts of yourself that you have disowned or do not like. Because we are all mirrors for each other, looking at the people in your life can tell you a lot about yourself. Who you are can be laid bare to you through what you see in others. It is easy to see the traits you do not like in others. It is much more difficult to realize that you possess those same traits. Often, the habits, attitudes, and behaviors of others are closely linked to our unconscious and unresolved issues. When you come into contact with someone you admire, search your soul for similarly admirable traits. Likewise, when you meet someone exhibiting traits that you dislike, accept that you are looking at your reflection. Looking at yourself through your perception of others can be a humbling and eye-opening experience. You can also cultivate in you the traits and behaviors that you do like. Be loving and respectful to all people, and you will attract individuals that will love and respect you back. Nurture compassion and empathy and let the goodness you see in others be your mirror. Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Have i ever stopped to think that the impulse to “blow off steam” and say something unkind or even vicious will, if followed through, hurt me far more seriously than the person to whom the insult is directed? I must try constantly to quiet my mind before I act with impatience or hostility, for my mind can be — in that very real way — an enemy as great as any I’ve ever known. Will I look before I leap, think before I speak — and try to avoid self-will to the greatest extent possible? Today I Pray May I remember that my blow-ups and explosions, when they are torrents of accusations or insults, hurt me just as much as the other person. May I try not to let my anger get to the blow-up stage, simply be recognizing it as I go along and stating it as a fact. Today I Will Remember Keep a loose lid on the teapot. *************************************** One More Day In these times one must write with one’s life. This is the challenge to all of us. – Antoine de St. Exupery When we were younger, many of us had a prescribed course of life — first school, a job, marriage, and then children. we never realized, and luckily so, that we would be dealt cards in a game we wouldn’t want to play. With the illness, sorrows, and pain have come jooy, delight, and happiness. We would not have wanted to see into the furture, but now that we are here, we all want to live life as well as we are able. The need to deal as best we can with our burdens advances us toward positive actions and thoughts. What good or bad things happen to us do not determine a life’s story as much as the choices we make. We can shoose to be challenged. We can choose our directions. Changes or improvements can begin today with the decision I make. ***************************************** One Day At A Time FAULT FINDING “When You Look For The Bad In Mankind Expecting To Find It, You Surely Will.” ~ Abraham Lincoln The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous says, "To conclude that others were wrong was as far as most of us ever got." It seemed as though I spent half a lifetime discovering the faults in others. I used this information as a tool or weapon against them when the need would arise, or if I needed a victory to feel superior when I was feeling low. How very sick. It took me a long time to learn that all of us have weaknesses; it's part of being an imperfect human being. We also have strengths and talents, sometimes waiting to be discovered. My job now is to search for the good in others, to overlook the pettiness, to understand that they are still growing and becoming. I am also to practice ongoing forgiveness, for them as well as for myself, to remember that God is still spiritually creating us all in His image. One Day at a Time . . . Have I quit fault finding others? Myself? God? Jeremiah ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote God alone can judge our sex situation. Counsel with other persons is often desirable, but we let God be the final judge. We realize that some people are as fanatical about sex as others are loose. We avoid hysterical thinking or advice. - Pgs. 69-70 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Don't ever think you have it made, because you haven't. You are only one drink away from a drunk, one hit away from a high. Staying in your program and close to the fellowship is your best bet right now. Let me not get so carried away with my two weeks of sobriety that I get cocky and lose sight of the truth. My Work I am whole and in tact and as such I have a positive contribution to make to this world. My work needs me. Whatever my gifts are, I will share them. I will not hold back, telling myself I am not ready, not smart enough, not good enough. Today is the day. This is as good a place to begin as any. I will dig deep into myself and find beauty and wisdom. I will produce good works and I will share those openly with others. As I expand my own consciousness, it becomes my responsibility to share what I learn with the collective. I am available to find my mission. I will give myself the gift of feeling purposeful, today. I will share my gifts - Tian Dayton PhD You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land, there is no other life but this. Henry David Thoreau Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The smallest deed is better than the grandest intention. The smallest kindness is better than the best pitch. It's nice to be important but it's more important to be nice. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Self-respect is the most important respect you can earn. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I trust the positive and loving people to whom I am attracted. Today I am free to share from my heart, knowing that what I say will be treated with love and respect. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote The most effective prayer I ever said had only five words, the longest word being a swear word. God didn't seem to mind. Trip S. |
December 11
Daily Reflections A GENUINE HUMILITY . . . . we are actually to practice a genuine humility. This is to the end that our great blessings may never spoil us; that we shall forever live in thankful contemplation of Him who presides over us all. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 192 Experience has taught me that my alcoholic personality tends to be grandiose. While having seemingly good intentions, I can go off on tangents in pursuit of my "causes." My ego takes over and I lose sight of my primary purpose. I may even take credit for God's handiwork in my life. Such an overstated feeling of my own importance is dangerous to my sobriety and could cause great harm to A.A. as a whole. My safeguard, the Twelfth Tradition, serves to keep me humble. I realize, both as an individual and as a member of the Fellowship, that I cannot boast of my accomplishments, and that "God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves." ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Doctors think of the A.A. fellowship as group therapy. This is a very narrow conception of the depth of the A.A. fellowship. Looking at it purely as a means of acquiring and holding sobriety, it is right as far as it goes. But it doesn't go far enough. Group therapy is directed toward the help that the individual receives from it. It is essentially selfish. It is using the companionship of other alcoholics only in order to stay sober ourselves. But this is only the beginning of real A.A. fellowship. Do I deeply feel the true A.A. fellowship? Meditation For The Day Most of us have had to live through the dark part of our lives, the time of failure, the nighttime of our lives, when we were full of struggle and care, worry and remorse, when we felt deeply the tragedy of life. But with our daily surrender to a Higher Power, comes a peace and joy that makes all things new. We can now take each day as a joyous sunrise-gift from God to use for Him and for other fellow people. The night of the past is gone, this day is ours. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may take this day as a gift from God. I pray that I may thank God for this day and be glad in it. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It We Need Outside Help, p.248 It was evident that a solitary self-appraisal, and the admission of our defects based upon that alone, wouldn't be nearly enough. We'd have to have outside help if we were surely to know and admit the truth about ourselves--the help of God and of another human being. Only by discussing ourselves, holding back nothing, only by being willing to take advice and accept direction could we set foot on the road to straight thinking, solid honesty, and genuine humility. ******************************** If we are fooling ourselves, a competent adviser can see this quickly. And, as he skillfully guides us away from our fantasies, we are surprised to find that we have few of the usual urges to defend ourselves against unpleasant truths. In no other way can fear, pride, and ignorance be so readily melted. After a time, we realize that we are standing firm on a brand-new foundation for integrity, and we gratefully credit our sponsors, whose advice pointed the way. 1. 12 & 12, p.59 2. Grapevine, August 1961 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Keep the Focus on Personal Responsibility Responsible attitudes. Alcoholics often try to shift responsibility to others. We once thought it was possible to blame others for our drinking, and we had sneaky ways of manipulating family members so they would feel guilty and comply with our demands. In sober living, we must not allow ourselves to slip back into this mode of thinking. Keeping the focus on personal responsibility is our best way of approaching all problems. "What is my responsibility in this?" is a good question to ask in evaluating our part in situations. We are always responsible for our own sobriety. Beyond that, we're also responsible for maintaining good attitudes and making sure that our own anger and pride do not make any situation worse than it already is. I'll be responsible today for my own thoughts, feelings, and actions. If any stressful issue or situation arises, I'll keep my focus on personal responsibility. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple When patterns are broken, new worlds emerge.--Tuli Keupferberg. Recovery has happened to us. We stopped drinking or using other drugs and, like magic, a new world appeared. Being sober sure shakes up a person's life! It's good to shake up our world every now and then. This way, we see there's not just one “world”, but many. We grow each time we step into a new world and learn new things. Of course, the addict's world was new and exciting to us at one time. But we got trapped and couldn't find our way out. Our Higher Power had to free us. We need to try new worlds, but we always need to take our Higher Power with us--into worlds where there's honesty, love, and trust. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, lead me to new worlds where I'll learn more about living fully. Action for the Day: I'll list 3 ways I can step into a new world today. For example, I could read something new, go to a museum, or eat a new food. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Occupation is essential. --Virginia Woolf Having desires, setting goals, and achieving them are necessary to our fulfillment. There is purpose to our lives, even when we can't clearly see our direction; even when we doubt our abilities to contribute. Let us continue to respond to our opportunities. Many of us experienced the clouds of inaction in earlier periods waiting, waiting, waiting, hoping our circumstances would change, even praying they would, but taking no responsibility for changing what was in our power. Inaction caged us. Stripped of power, life held little or no meaning. However, we've been given another chance. The program has changed our lives. We have a reason for living, each day, even the days we feel hopeless and worthless. Maybe we are without a goal at this time. Perhaps the guidance is not catching our attention. We can become quiet with ourselves and let our daydreams act as indicators. We have something essential to do, and we are being given all the chances we'll need to fulfill our purpose. We can trust in our worth, our necessity to others. I will remember, the program came to me. I must have a part to play. I will look and listen for my opportunities today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION If circumstances warrant, we ask our wives or friends to join us in morning meditation. If we belong to a religious denomination which requires a definite morning devotion, we attend to that also. If not members of religious bodies, we sometimes select and memorize a few set prayers which emphasize the principles we have been discussing. There are many helpful books also. Suggestions about these may be obtained from one’s priest, minister, or rabbi. Be quick to see where religious people are right. Make use of what they offer. p. 87 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. In my first year in A.A. I was going to at least seven meetings a week. I just loved it. I dressed up in suits like the men I had seen. I went to work building a mall, and there was an A.A. member working there who had eight years of sobriety, and we would share together every day. I know now God put that guy there for me. p. 484 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Nor is this the only kind of Twelfth Step work. We sit in A.A. meetings and listen, not only to receive something ourselves, but to give the reassurance and support which our presence can bring. If our turn comes to speak at a meeting, we again try to carry A.A.'s message. Whether our audience is one or many, it is still Twelfth Step work. There are many opportunities even for those of us who feel unable to speak at meetings or who are so situated that we cannot do much face-to-face Twelfth Step work. We can be the ones who take on the unspectacular but important tasks that make good Twelfth Step work possible, perhaps arranging for the coffee and cake after the meetings, where so many skeptical, suspicious newcomers have found confidence and comfort in the laughter and talk. This is Twelfth Step work in the very best sense of the word. "Freely ye have received; freely give..." is the core of this part of Step Twelve. p. 110 ************************************************** ********* Cease to inquire what the future has in store, and take as a gift whatever the day brings forth. --Horace "Ask for what you want. Ask for help, ask for input, ask for advice and ideas -- but never be afraid to ask." --Brian Tracy "Material success may result in the accumulation of possessions; but only spiritual success will enable you to enjoy them." --Nido Qubein "The act of taking the first step is what separates the winners from the losers." --Brian Tracy Life is very beautiful, you know. It is a gift given to us by God. Don’t ignore its beauty. Don’t ignore its joy. Don’t ignore its love. Embrace it, cherish it, and live it with all of your heart. Make the life you live as beautiful and wonderful as the life God has given you. Whether you are rich or poor, young or old, healthy or sick always remember that life is beautiful and so are you. --Joseph J. Mazzella ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation TODAY "The only courage that matters is the kind that gets you from one moment to the next." -- Mignon McLaughlin I do not have to have courage for a lifetime, just for the moment. I am helped by the philosophy that teaches me to live one day at a time, one hour at a time, one moment at a time. It is too awesome to try to live my tomorrows today. Life is a process to be lived not a future to be anticipated. For years I tried to anticipate what life had to throw at me, and I always came away confused, surprised and exhausted. I missed the joy of the moment by worrying about the future. What was he going to do? What happens if the police get involved? Will my mother telephone next week? Will my niece grow up to be alcoholic? Am I to blame? I had a thousand questions that I could not answer; nobody can answer for the future today. I can only take responsibility for my life a day at a time. I developed the courage to face the moment and I became a winner. May I avoid the temptation to seek the fantasy of tomorrow for the reality of today. ************************************************** ********* For God did not appoint us to wrath, but to obtain salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ...' 1 Thessalonians 5:9 "I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone-- for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. This is good, and pleases God our Savior, who wants all men to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth." I Timothy 2:1-5 “He who covers and forgives an offense seeks love, but he who repeats or harps on a matter separates even close friends.” Proverbs 17:9 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Use Jesus' as your example on how to live. Lord, You will guide and advise us and then You will leave it to us to decide our own future. Give us wisdom in our choices. God gives abundantly to those who pass His gifts on to others. Lord, let Your blessings flow in to me and then out from me. I will neither be selfish nor let my gifts stagnate. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Misery Is Optional "No one is forcing us to give up our misery." Basic Text pg. 29 It's funny to remember how reluctant we once were to surrender to recovery. We seemed to think we had wonderful, fulfilling lives as using addicts and that giving up our drugs would be worse than serving a life sentence at hard labor. In reality, the opposite was true: Our lives were miserable, but we were afraid to trade that familiar misery for the uncertainties of recovery. It's possible to be miserable in recovery, too, though it's not necessary. No one will force us to work the steps, go to meetings, or work with a sponsor. There is no NA militia that will force us to do the things that will free us from pain. But we do have a choice. We've already chosen to give up the misery of active addiction for the sanity of recovery. Now, if we're ready to exchange today's misery for even greater peace, we have a means to do just that - if we really want to. Just for today: I don't have to be miserable unless I really want to be. Today, I will trade in my misery for the benefits of recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Feelings are everywhere--gentle. --J. Masai Throughout the day we experience many feelings. Losing something makes us angry. Fighting with a friend makes us sad. Perhaps we're lonely because no one is home. Getting an unexpected treat makes us happy. Our feelings come and go just like the hours of our lives. Letting our feelings be whatever they are is good. They'll go away in time. We may not like all feelings; sadness or anger may be uncomfortable, but being human means we'll have many different feelings each day. If we're quiet with them, they'll help us grow and understand others better, and then they will suddenly be gone, replaced perhaps by a feeling we like more. Will I be able to accept my feelings today whether I like them or not? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The art of living lies not in eliminating but in growing with troubles. -- Bernard M. Baruch Naturally, we wish to avoid pain and difficulty, but life experience and a measure of reflection show us that most of what comes our way is beyond our control. We'll never outwit all the possibilities for trouble, even if we live to be 100 years old. We have often failed to learn from trouble because we cast ourselves in the roles of passive men and victims. We pointed outside ourselves and said, "Look at what is happening to poor me!" When we use trouble as our teacher, we develop the art of living. We are taking a spiritual approach, using our Higher Power as our guide. We can choose today to use our difficulties for our learning and growth. We might ask, "What can I learn from this experience about myself as a man? How can I use this to strengthen myself for the future?" Serenity develops, not by eliminating life's difficulties, but by having a reliable relationship with our Higher Power in the midst of it all. With God as my guide, I will use whatever comes my way as an opportunity for growth. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Occupation is essential. --Virginia Woolf Having desires, setting goals, and achieving them are necessary to our fulfillment. There is purpose to our lives, even when we can't clearly see our direction; even when we doubt our abilities to contribute. Let us continue to respond to our opportunities. Many of us experienced the clouds of inaction in earlier periods waiting, waiting, waiting, hoping our circumstances would change, even praying they would, but taking no responsibility for changing what was in our power. Inaction caged us. Stripped of power, life held little or no meaning. However, we've been given another chance. The program has changed our lives. We have a reason for living, each day, even the days we feel hopeless and worthless. Maybe we are without a goal at this time. Perhaps the guidance is not catching our attention. We can become quiet with ourselves and let our daydreams act as indicators. We have something essential to do, and we are being given all the chances we'll need to fulfill our purpose. We can trust in our worth, our necessity to others. I will remember, the program came to me. I must have a part to play. I will look and listen for my opportunities today. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Affirmations One of our choices in recovery is choosing what we want to think - using our mental energy positively. Positive mental energy, positive thinking, does not mean we think unrealistically or revert to denial. If we don't like something, we respect our own opinion. If we spot a problem, we're honest about it. if something isn't working out, we accept reality. But we don't dwell on the negative parts of our experience. Whatever we give energy to, we empower. There is magic in empowering the good, because whatever we empower grows bigger. One way to empower the good is through affirmations: simple positive statements we make to ourselves: I love myself... I'm good enough... My life is good...I'm glad I'm alive today... What I want and need is coming to me... I can... Our choice in recovery is not whether to use affirmations. We've been affirming thoughts and beliefs since we were old enough to speak. The choice in recovery is what we want to affirm. Today, I will empower the good in myself, others, and life. I'm willing to release, or let go of, negative thought patterns and replace them with positive ones. I will choose what I want to affirm, and I will make it good. The world can not change overnight, nor can I. Just one step at a time, one day at a time, I'm exactly where I need to be to get to exactly where I am going. I trust this process today. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Make Time to Play Go play. Yes, take a break and go play. When your head starts to pound and your back starts to ache, stop. Do something you want to do. Something that feels good, feels fun. Leave your worries behind. Put them in a box, then close it, and go play. We make sure that our children take time for recess every day. But we forget that we need recess,too. The lingering threads of work and worry can tie us to tasks done and undone. They can block our connection to joy, creativity, and the vital life-giving force that courses through us all. We no longer need to slump with tension and fatigue. It isn’t necessary and it doesn’t help a thing. Most often, it hurts. Your fatigue may be from lack of play as much as lack of sleep. You might begin to see that you don’t need a rest, a nap, or more vitamin C. You need to play. Play as much as you can. Find time– take time– to play. It may give you the energy you need. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Touch and taste your life Tonight, the sun set like a red ball over the hill to the west of the house. There’s an eclipse coming in just a few days, and the ocean knows it. She can feel the moon. She rises high on her haunches, ready to pounce, then slowly rolls forward. The waves build and stretch until finally the lip crumbles and the back of the wave chases the front of the wave culminating in a massive waterfall. She smashes against the pilings, shaking the entire house. The sky is rose, lavender, and black. The house smells richly of the pasta and meat sauce in the pots on the stove. A cedar log burning in the fireplace warms the room. This is my experience now. It’s an enchanted moment when the world rests but is still alive. Experience is the privilege of being human. I can taste the spagetti. I can smell the salt of the ocean. I can feel the burning cedar taking the chill out of the air. I can love. I can hurt. What a sweet experience this is. And I thank God for every moment and feeling of each experience I’ve been given. Do you taste your life? Or do you float through it unaware of the beauty that surrounds you each day? We weren’t meant to sleep all the time. Sometimes when we first become sober or begin recovering from codependency, we wonder what we’ll ever do with all this time and all the feelings that we’re left with now that the alcohol and drama have been taken away. Revel in the experience you’re going through. Feel, touch, and taste each moment of your life. Then be aware of how exquisitely beautiful it is. What’s you’re experience right now? God, help me be aware of the beauty and power that flows through this universe. Help me remember how connected I am to that beauty and power through each experience I’ve been given. *************************************** Blessing Our Bodies Self-Body Scan by Madisyn Taylor We can detect subtle changes in our own bodies by performing our own energy scan on a regular basis. As the living vehicles for our spirits, our bodies deserve loving attention and care. We can positively affect our health, prevent illness, and heal injuries by regularly focusing our mental and spiritual energy on the workings of our bodies. This can be done by performing a body scan on yourself. Begin by lying in a comfortable position and taking three deep cleansing breaths. Imagine, if you will, a sunbeam entering the top of your head. Feel this light slowly scanning each part of your internal body. Allow it to scan every cell in your body and keep breathing. Every time you exhale, blow out negative energy you may feel. Notice any changes in your body. Sensations may vary from person to person. You may feel a shift in body temperature, see a color or flash of light, or hear a voice offering you guidance. If you feel a block in a certain area of your body, sit with that block and feel into it. Ask your body why that block is there and what you need to do to release it. Try not to judge or analyze the wisdom that comes to you. Often, we experience energy blocks in our body because our body is trying to tell us something. You may want to breathe into that area until you feel the block dissolving. When you have finished your scan, take one last deep breath and exhal! e any energetic residue that you are ready to release. The body doesn’t lie, and it has much wisdom to share with us. Any injuries or blocks that exist in our bodies are there so that we can learn from having them in our bodies. An existing injury can teach us to slow down or help us recognize that something is out of balance in our bodies. The more you scan your body, the better you will become at it. If you sense that something is not right in your body, you may want to visit a doctor and tell them about your experience. When you have finished your scan, don’t forget to thank your wonderful, amazing body. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Before I came to The Program — in fact, before I knew of The Program’s existence — I drifted from crisis to crisis. Occasionally, I tried to use my will to chart a new course; however, like a rudderless ship, I inevitably foundered once again on the rocks of my own despair. Today, in contrast, I receive guidance from my Higher Power. Sometimes, the only answer is a sense of peace or an assurance that all is well. Even though there may be a time of waiting before I see results, or before any direct guidance comes, will I try to remain confident that things are working out in ways that will be for the greatest good of everyone concerned? Today I Pray May I not expect instant, verbal communication with my Higher Power, like directions on a stamped, self-addressed post-card. May I have patience, and listen, and sense that God is present. May I accept my new feelings of radiant warmth and serenity as God’s way of assuring me that I am, finally, making some good choices. Today I Will Remember Patience: God’s message will come. *************************************** One More Day I’ve heard He works with broken people, I am sick, hurting, broken. I am waiting and willing now…. – Flora E. Meredith Sometimes life can feel so hopeless. Pain, anxiety about health, and fear can plague our thoughts. Admitting things are out of our control can be so hard. It takes a tremendous amount of courage to admit that we need help. Giving ourselves over to the care of our Higher Power is frightening when we have become used to taking care of our own needs. The hardest job is ours, though, for we must be willing to let go of that part of ourselves that is troubled, in order to become whole once again. We must be willing to let go in order to be helped. I have made the hardest move and placed myself into the care of my Higher Power. Now I must wait. ***************************************** One Day At A Time REAL LIVING "A life lived in fear is a life half-lived." Tara Morice as Fran, (From Baz Luhrmann's film "Strictly Ballroom") When I first saw this movie in 1993, it spoke volumes to my life and to my recovery. I had spent my life afraid, afraid of everything and everybody. If I crossed you, I feared your wrath. If I disappointed you, I dreaded the loss of your love. If things were going well, I wondered, often aloud, when the other shoe was going to drop. I had nowhere to go, no one to trust, nothing I could believe in, because I knew it would be taken away from me. The only safe haven I had was in the food, but I was afraid of the consequences. The biggest thing that kept me in my disease was the fear of what might be on the other side. The bravest thing I ever did was walk through the doors of my first program meeting. I had been shamed into it by a therapist, but once I got there I sensed that my fears would be vanquished. I saw people who had been there, done that, and designed the t-shirt of fear that I was wearing. They showed me, through the Steps and Traditions, that there was more to life. The program of recovery has taught me that a life of fear indeed is a life half-lived. Living in fear, I only succeeded in quashing the joy, the adventure, the zest for life that was naturally planted in me. It also eliminated the biggest fear ... that of a Higher Power. It has given me faith, the diametric opposite of fear. Faith shined its light on the darkness of my life, and allowed me to live a fuller existence that cannot be taken from me, save for retreat into fearful despair. I am so immensely grateful for what I have been given: life, instead of mere existence. One Day at a Time . . . Faith in a Power greater than myself is a powerful antidote to a fearful, half-lived life. I pray to keep the light of faith shining brightly in my life. Mark ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code. - Pg. 84 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote One of the things you can learn right now is that it is OK not to have all of the answers. For the first time in a long time, no one expects you to know anything. Enjoy it! Let me know it is OK to not be strong. It is OK to rely on my Higher Power. Forgiving and Moving On As I work through the blocks in the way of my own serenity I find that I consider forgiveness as a way to release the residue of resentment and pain that live inside me from unresolved issues from the past. As I put more and more energy into my own personal growth, I find that I value my own peace of mind more than holding onto anger and hurt. I find I want to lay the sword down. It becomes too heavy in my hand, the weight of carrying it encumbers my own freedom. Today, the present I will give myself is forgiveness. I am ready to consider forgiveness - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The consequences of being dishonest, of being a liar, is not so much that others will not believe you, as it is that you can not believe others. 'Does what I gain by lying balance out the integrity I lose?' (P 54, CDA First Edition) "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Surrender, don't quit. Time for Joy - Book - Quote The world can not change overnight, nor can I. Just one step at a time, one day at a time, I'm exactly where I need to be to get to exactly where I am going. I trust this process today. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Self Will: An alkie ship's captain at night sees a light dead ahead, on collision course and sends a signal; 'Change your course, 12 degrees west.' A signal comes back; 'Change your's 12 degrees east.' The captain begins to get angry; 'I'm a captain.' The reply: 'I'm a seaman, 2nd class.' The captain is furious now: 'I'm on a destroyer, change your course, and call me sir!' The reply; 'I'm on a lighthouse, your call.. sir.' - Jack K. (Amended) |
December 12
Daily Reflections A COMMON SOLUTION The tremendous fact for every one of us is that we have discovered a common solution. We have a way out on which we can absolutely agree, and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action. This is the great news this book carries to those who suffer from alcoholism. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 17 The most far-reaching Twelfth Step work was the publication of our Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous. Few can equal that book for carrying the message. My idea is to get out of myself and simply do what I can. Even if I haven't been asked to sponsor and my phone rarely rings, I am still able to do Twelfth Step work. I get involved in "brotherly and harmonious action." At meetings I show up early to greet people and to help set up, and to share my experience, strength and hope. I also do what I can with service work. My Higher Power gives me exactly what He wants me to do at any given point in my recovery and, if I let Him, my willingness will bring Twelfth Step work automatically. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Clergymen speak of the spiritual fellowship of the church. This is much closer to the A.A. way than mere group therapy. Such a fellowship is based on a common belief in God and a common effort to live a spiritual life. We try to do this in A.A. We also try to get down to the real problems in each others' lives. We try to open up to each other. We have a real desire to be of service to each other. We try to go deep down into the personal lives of our members. Do I appreciate the deep personal fellowship of A.A.? Meditation For The Day Love and fear cannot dwell together. By their very natures, they cannot exist side by side. Fear is a very strong force. And therefore a weak and vacillating love can soon be routed by fear. But a strong love, a love that trusts in God, is sure eventually to conquer fear. The only sure way to dispel fear is to have the love of God more and more in your heart and soul. Prayer For The Day I pray that love will drive out the fear in my life. I pray that my fear will flee before the power of the love of God. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Going It Alone, p. 274 Going it alone in spiritual matters is dangerous. How many times have we heard well-intentioned people claim the guidance of God when it was plain that they were mistaken? Lacking both practice and humility, they deluded themselves and were so able to justify the most arrant nonsense on the ground that this was what God had told them. People of very high spiritual development almost always insist on checking with friends or spiritual advisers the guidance they feel they have received from God. Surely, then, a novice ought not lay himself open to the chance of making foolish, perhaps tragic, blunders. While the comment or advice of others may not be infallible, it is likely to be far more specific than any direct guidance we may receive while we are still inexperienced in establishing contact with a Power greater than ourselves. 12 & 12, p. 60 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Demanding credit Approval. The struggle for recognition sometimes takes an ugly form in AA. Even the pioneers of AA had disputes about who deserved credit for the fellowship's success. Demanding credit and recognition is a loser's game for people who are seeking growth in sobriety. It is an indication that we still need applause and approval of the sort that drove us while we were drinking. It is a way of saying that we still don't believe good work should be done for its own sake, but rather for the applause that goes with it. The real kicker is that people who demand recognition never get enough of it. Ironically, if we don't try to obtain credit for our actions, it sometimes comes anyway, without effort on our part. I'll watch myself for any tendency to demand credit for the things I do in the program. My healthy growth in sobriety should be reward enough. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple God gave us memory that we might have roses in December.--James M. Barrie. Do you remember what it was like to not have sobriety? Remember the shame? Remember the loneliness? Remember lying and wishing you could stop? Remember the powerlessness? Do you remember, also, how it felt when you began to believe you had an illness? Your shame was lifted. Remember what it was like to look around at your meeting and know you belonged? Your loneliness was lifted. Remember when you family started to trust you again? Your dishonesty had been lifted. Sobriety gives us many roses. Our memory will help to keep them fresh. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, never let me forget what it was like. Why? Because I'm only one drink or pill away from losing You. Action for the Day: I'll find a friend I trust. I'll tell that person what my life was like before sobriety. I'll also talk about how I got sober. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning If I am to be remembered, I hope it is for the honesty I try to demonstrate, the patience I try to live by, and the compassion I feel for others. --JoAnn Reed Each of us hopes we are leaving a lasting, positive impression on those we befriend and maybe even those we encounter by chance. Having others speak well of us provides the strokes that are often necessary to our "keeping on" when difficulties surface. What we sometimes forget is that we are responsible for whatever lasting impression we leave. Our behavior does influence what another person carries away from our mutual experience. We may have left unfavorable impressions during our using days. On occasion, we do yet. However, it's progress, not perfection, we're after. And each day we begin anew, with a clear slate and fresh opportunities to spread good cheer, to treat others with love and respect, to face head-on and with full honesty all situations drawing our attention and participation. As I look forward to the hours ahead, I will remember that I control my actions toward others. If I want to be remembered fondly, I must treat each person so. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day “Thy will be done.” We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves. It works--it really does. We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us in the simple way we have just outlined. But this is not all. There is action and more action. “Faith without works is dead.” The next chapter is entirely devoted to Step Twelve. pp. 87-88 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. During that year, I was offered a job with the city and one with a construction company out of town. My sponsor counseled me to stay where I had support of my group and my A.A. friends; I was too young in the program for an adventure. I went with the city and am now retired from there. A guy like me--with one employer for eighteen years! p. 484 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." We may often pass through Twelfth Step experiences where we will seem to be temporarily off the beam. These will appear as big setbacks at the time, but will be seen later as stepping-stones to better things. For example, we may set our hearts on getting a particular person sobered up, and after doing all we can for months, we see him relapse. Perhaps this will happen in a succession of cases, and we may be deeply discouraged as to our ability to carry A.A.'s message. Or we may encounter the reverse situation, in which we are highly elated because we seem to have been successful. Here the temptation is to become rather possessive of these newcomers. Perhaps we try to give them advice about their affairs which we aren't really competent to give or ought not give at all. Then we are hurt and confused when the advice is rejected, or when it is accepted and brings still greater confusion. By a great deal of ardent Twelfth Step work we sometimes carry the message to so many alcoholics that they place us in a position of trust. They make us, let us say, the group's chairman. Here again we are presented with the temptation to overmanage things, and sometimes this results in rebuffs and other consequences which are hard to take. But in the longer run we clearly realize that these are only the pains of growing up, and nothing but good can come from them if we turn more and more to the entire Twelve Steps for the answers. pp. 110-111 ************************************************** ********* Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you the best way they know how. --Unknown Smiles are contagious. See if you can infect someone today. --unknown I can't do His will my way. --unknown "It is a sign of strength, not of weakness, to admit that you don't know all the answers." --John P. Loughrane Miracles are not just extraordinary occurrences. They are also small simple things that are often overlooked. Take the time today to notice one. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PRINCIPLES "At the back of every noble life are the principles that have fashioned it." -- George Lorimer God is to be found in the principles of life. The suggested patterns of behavior that lead to happiness, freedom and unity in the world. God is not just a "good idea", an intellectual philosophy or other worldly entity. God is practical goodness that can be demonstrated and seen in the world. Principles lead to action; principles produce change in attitude and behavior; principles must have a practical result. Sometimes you hear the phrase "walk the talk", implying that the principles we talk about should be evident in our daily lives. Also principles should be seen in the small things of life being courteous, giving a smile to a stranger, offering a hug to a friend in pain. God is alive in the principles of life. Help me to practice the principles I believe in. ************************************************** ********* "Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. All of us who are mature should take such a view of things. And if on some point you think differently, that too God will make clear to you. Only let us live up to what we have already attained." Philippians 3:12-16 "Your life will be brighter than the noonday....And you will have confidence, because there is hope." Job 11:17-18 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Reach higher than you think possible for all that you want and you find that often you attain even more. Lord, I rely on Your promises made to each of us and especially on Your love. Be patient with others, but mostly be patient with yourself. Lord, help me to keep a smile on my face and to realize my goodness and refuse to dwell on my imperfections. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Fear Of Change "By working the steps, we come to accept a Higher Power's will.... We lose our fear of the unknown. We are set free." Basic Text pg. 16 Life is a series of changes, both large and small. Although we may know and accept this fact intellectually, chances are that our initial emotional reaction to change is fear. For some reason, we assume that each and every change is going to hurt, causing us to be miserable. If we look back on the changes that have happened in our lives, we'll find that most of them have been for the best. We were probably very frightened at the prospect of life without drugs, yet it's the best thing that's ever happened to us. Perhaps we've lost a job that we thought we'd die without, but later on we found greater challenge and personal fulfillment in a new career. As we venture forth in our recovery, we're likely to experience more changes. We will outgrow old situations and become ready for new ones. With all sorts of changes taking place, it's only natural to grab hold of something, anything familiar and try to hold on. Solace can be found in a Power greater than ourselves. The more we allow changes to happen at the direction of our Higher Power, the more we'll trust that those changes are for the best. Faith will replace fear, and we'll know in our hearts that all will be well. Just for today: When I am afraid of a change in my life, I will take comfort from knowing that God's will for me is good. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Patience is needed with everyone, but first of all with ourselves. --Saint Francis De Sales One night Sandra was having trouble putting a puzzle together. Angrily, she pushed all the pieces into a huge pile. "I can't do this," she said. She got up and walked over to the couch and plopped down. "Let me tell you a story," said her dad, as he sat down next to her. "There was a daughter who helped her dad take care of her baby sister. Again and again, she helped her baby sister stand and try to walk. One day the daughter tried to put a puzzle together but gave up after only a few tries. She had forgotten how many times she had helped her baby sister." We are all like Sandra, sometimes. We forget to allow ourselves to fail, even though our growth up to now has been a series of failures that we learned from. With patience, we allow ourselves to take chances we might not otherwise explore, and we widen our world of possibilities. Life has been patient with us so far, now it's our turn. What have I failed at that I can try again today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I like a man with faults, especially when he knows it. To err is human - I'm uncomfortable around gods. --Hugh Prather We are more comfortable around a man who has faults and knows it. We respect such a man. So why do we have such a hard time admitting our own faults? This matter of honesty comes very gradually and only with hard work. We may have to force ourselves to admit a fault because we expect to feel unworthy. In fact, what we do feel after admitting a fault is peacefulness and self-respect. We may expect to be rejected and judged by friends, but usually friendships grow more solid when we admit our faults. A true friend does not need to trust that we will always be right, only that we will be honest. At this moment are we being nagged by some fault? Is there something about the way we have talked to someone that doesn't seem right? Have we been unfair or dishonest? This is a program of progress, not perfection. So, to make progress we admit our imperfections, and as we do, we become more fully human. God, in this moment when I feel my human mistakes, help me to be open to your love. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. If I am to be remembered, I hope it is for the honesty I try to demonstrate, the patience I try to live by, and the compassion I feel for others. --JoAnn Reed Each of us hopes we are leaving a lasting, positive impression on those we befriend and maybe even those we encounter by chance. Having others speak well of us provides the strokes that are often necessary to our "keeping on" when difficulties surface. What we sometimes forget is that we are responsible for whatever lasting impression we leave. Our behavior does influence what another person carries away from our mutual experience. We may have left unfavorable impressions during our using days. On occasion, we do yet. However, it's progress, not perfection, we're after. And each day we begin anew, with a clear slate and fresh opportunities to spread good cheer, to treat others with love and respect, to face head-on and with full honesty all situations drawing our attention and participation. As I look forward to the hours ahead, I will remember that I control my actions toward others. If I want to be remembered fondly, I must treat each person so. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. God's Will Each day, ask God what God wants us to do today; then ask God to help. A simple request, but so profound and far reaching it can take us anywhere we need to go. Listen: all that we want, all that we need, all the answers, all the help, all the good, all the love, all the healing, all the wisdom, all the fulfillment of desire is embodied in this simple request. We need say no more than Thank You. This Plan that has been made for us is not one of deprivation. It is one of fullness, joy, and abundance. Walk into it. See for yourself. Today, I will ask God to show me what God wants me to do for this day, and then ask for help to do that. I will trust that is sufficient to take me into light and joy. There is something special waiting for me to do with this day. I know that when it is time I will be inspired from a place deep within myself. I trust that I will know what to do when the time is right. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Protect Your Energy Just as we strive to protect and conserve earth’s energy resources, we can strive to protect and conserve our own. Become more aware of the impact of things, people, and activities on you and your energy. What feeds you, charges you? What drains and depletes you? As you grow and become more sensitive to how things feel to you, you’ll naturally grow to dislike and be uncomfortable with whatever drains or negatively impacts your energy. Yes, some difficult, draining situations are inevitable. But we can learn to protect ourselves in those situations. Sometimes we need to let go of people, places, and behaviors that don’t work for us anymore, that drain, exhaust, and deplete us. Pay attention to the impact of certain people, places, behaviors, and events on your energy. Pay attention to how you feel when you eat certain foods, drink certain beverages, go certain places. Learn to listen to your body, your emotions, and your heart. Be prepared to let go of some things and people along the way. Be gentle with yourself while you do. Learn to conserve your energy. It is a precious, valuable resource. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Create an extraordinary life I ran into my friend one day on the street. I asked him how he was. He said not very good. But if he won the lottery– and he showed me a few tickets– he’d be happy then. I asked him if business was slow. He said, yes, income was down and bills were up. He needed a big hit to balance the ledger sheet. We talked for a while. I asked him what he made an hour. He said $100, but he was mostly getting appointments for half-hour sessions. He was a therapist, and business wasn’t very promising right now. “Gee,” I said, counting up the hours in a week, “if you worked four half hours a day, that’s $1,000 dollars a week and $4,000 a month. Sounds like pretty good income, at least to me.” “I never thought of it that way,” he said. “Instead of trying to win the lottery or get that big break, why don’t you try to happily do just four half hours of work a day? Then you don’t have to win the lottery to break the bank. You’ll be pretty well off right now.” It’s easy to want to win the big one or think of a windfall as the only solution to the problems we face. And the lottery we want to win might not be just in money. We can easily take that kind of thinking into our relationships or our work. Buy a chance to win the lottery, if that’s what you want to do. But maybe you could look at things a different way. What if you stopped going for the big one and tried to do a lot of little things well? You could work on being the best friend that you could be. Or maybe you could get closer to that person you are dating. Instead of waiting for the perfect soul mate to come along, just be the best boyfriend or girlfriend in the relationship you already have. Instead of waiting to win the lottery, make the most out of all the ordinary moments in your life today. You’re richer than you think. God, help me remember that many ordinary moments, when well-lived, add up to an extraordinary life. *************************************** Finding Your Pinnacle Mountain Meditation by Madisyn Taylor Meditating near a mountain can be both powerful and grounding in a most profound way. Throughout history, humankind has stood in awe of mountains. The strength and sturdiness evident in the rocky crags and smooth slopes of peaks around the globe have from time immemorial inspired creativity and kindled courage. Mountains have been venerated by many cultures, which worshipped great summits as gods and sacred beings. In their looming presence, humanity has seen power, steadfastness, and resolve. Yet you needn’t live near a mountain to tap into this vast energy of commanding grandeur. Conversely, since mountains are as unique in form as human beings, your locale may exist under the unwavering gaze of a small mountain without your knowing it. As you practice mountain meditation, the power that lurks in the heart of all mountains will flow into you while their essential beauty reminds you that you, too, are a creature of the earth. If there are mountains in your area, plan to spend some time enjoying the peaceful embrace of Mother Nature, which can be a potent meditation aid. Likewise, grasping a rock or stone in your hand will enable you to easily tap into earth energy. If you are prevented by circumstance from visiting a mountain, however, begin by visualizing yourself at the base of a towering summit. Holding a rock can be helpful to tune into mountain energy. You may find yourself picturing a steep and majestic snowcapped peak or a lush, tree-covered mass that rises gently from the earth. Sit or imagine yourself sitting at the mountain’s base and spend a few minutes simply coexisting with it. When you feel tranquil, express your intention to commune with your mountain and ask to receive its energy. Project your consciousness onto the mountain’s peak, and look down upon the flatlands over which it stands guard. Send light to the flora and fauna that call the mountain home. You may discover that you ! feel wonderfully immense and unshakable as you delve deeper into the meditation. Finally, ask the mountain to serve as a guide and give it your sincerest gratitude. If you have literally visited a plateau or summit, pass time with the mountain by camping, hiking, or picnicking upon it. Or, if your journey has been a spiritual one, use your imagination to survey the sights, sounds, and scents of your mountain. As your explorations progress, you will become ever more grounded, growing gradually into your personal power. When you are finished meditating with mountain energy, give thanks to this strong and powerful energy for sharing time with you. Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day These days, if I go though an experience that is new and demanding, I can do so in a spirit of confidence and trust. Thanks to The Program and Twelve Steps, I’ve come to know that God is with me in all places and in all endeavors. His Spirit is in me as well as in the people around me. As a result, I feel comfortable even in new situations and at home even among strangers. Will I continue to flow along and grow along with The Program, trusting in the power and love of God at work in me and in my life? Today I Pray May God’s comfort be with me in all situations, familiar or new. May He rebuild the sagging bridge of my confidence. May I acknowledge God in me and in others around me. May that mutual identity in God help me communicate with people on a plane of honesty. If I can learn to trust God, I can learn to trust the ones who share this earth with me. Today I Will Remember God teaches me how to trust. *************************************** One More Day Unreal is action without discipline, charity without sympathy, ritual without devotion. Bhaqavadqita It’s so easy to routinely go about our lives without examining our motives, without deciding why we do the things we do. We may have become so accustomed to reacting to what we think is expected of us that we rarely ponder what we expect of ourselves. At what point do we become willing to know ourselves? Now may be the right moment to decide whether we act upon our own values, beliefs, and feelings, or whether we react to some vague sense of what others expect. By doing this, we might be surprised in discover that our charitable and spiritual actions do not change but they will become real because they are created by our inward sense of direction, discipline, love of others, and acceptance of self. The things I say and do today will be directed by what I expect of myself, not by what I think others expect of me. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~GOD IS ~ Open your eyes and the whole world is full of God. Jakob Bohme When I was a child, my family never talked about God. I never knew the light of God, never felt His love or power, or recognized His presence in my life. When things were rough, I could only see the darkness. When I was lonely, I didn't know He was with me all the time. When I was weak or scared, I thought I had to overcome and be strong, and not be afraid. I didn't feel His presence with me, or believe that He was watching over me. Then, for twenty years I was married to a religious man who did talk about God. I tried so hard to believe as he did, but his words soon lost their meaning. The abuse began to overshadow the hope that things would change, and the belief that God would make everything okay, if only I believed like my husband. For years I have struggled with my faith, trying to believe in a God that was willing to light my way, love me, and protect me ... not just in the good times, but in the painful times. When I first came into recovery, I was still struggling, but I became "willing to believe" that God cared about me. I started watching for signs that He was there, ready to light my path when I could see only the darkness, ready to enfold me in His arms when I felt unloveable, and ready to protect me when I was scared. I became willing to recognize His presence in my day-to-day life. Now that I am willing, I can find God's love everywhere ... in a friendly smile, in the kind words of a friend, in the beauty of a flower, and in a child's eyes. Sometimes, when life gets rough, I have to look a little harder, but it's there. I only have to remain open and willing to see it and accept it. Wherever I am, God is there with me, ready to love and protect me. One Day at a Time . . . I will be willing to see God's presence in my life, and know that wherever I am, God is. I will let go, and let God be there. Debbie K. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Among us are wives, relatives and friends whose problem has been solved, as well as some who have not yet found a happy solution. We want the wives of Alcoholics Anonymous to address the wives of men who drink too much. What they say will apply to nearly everyone bound by ties of blood or affection to an alcoholic. - Pg. 104 - To Wives Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Do not be afraid to tell someone, anyone when you feel like taking a drink or using some drug. This is normal and can only be dealt with through open communication. Help me understand that the 'need' to use isn't really a need but a symptom of chemical dependency and nothing to be ashamed of. The Work of Living God and I have work to do, together we have a life to co-create. Mine. I will daily spend time tuning into that deeper place within me so that I can use my energies more wisely and efficiently to build my life. I will get farther faster when I live consciously rather than unconsciously, when I look for guidance rather than stress unnecessarily and create problems that don't need to be there. When I stay calm and centered, my life goes more smoothly. When I allow spirit to guide me through my day, I see beauty where I may have missed it, I have a center to work from and return to and I walk in grace rather than stumble my way through the day. I am held and open to divine instruction - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'The turning point in the process of growing up is when you discover the core of strength within you that survives all hurt.' ~Max Lerner. That 'core of strength' is based on abstinence and spiritual principles. I suit up; I show up: I grow up. Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Practice makes progress. Time for Joy - Book - Quote There is something special waiting for me to do with this day. I know that when it is time I will be inspired from a place deep within myself. I trust that I will know what to do when the time is right. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote My folks know how to push my buttons, they installed them. - Anon. |
December 13
Daily Reflections THINKING OF OTHERS Our very lives, as ex-problem drinkers, depend upon our constant thought of others and how we may help meet their needs. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 20 Thinking of others has never come easily to me. Even when I try to work the A.A. program, I'm prone to thinking, "How do I feel today. Am I happy, joyous and free?" The program tells me that my thoughts must reach out to those around me: "Would that newcomer welcome someone to talk to?" "That person looks a little unhappy today, maybe I could cheer him up." It is only when I forget my problems, and reach out to contribute something to others that I can begin to attain the serenity and God-consciousness I seek. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We come now to A.A. fellowship. It is partly group therapy. It is partly spiritual fellowship. But it is even more. It is based on a common illness, a common failure, a common problem. It goes deep down into our personal lives and our personal needs. It requires a full opening up to each other of our inner most thoughts and most secret problems. All barriers between us are swept aside. They have to be. Then we try to help each other get well. The A.A. fellowship is based on a sincere desire to help the other person. In A.A. we can be sure of sympathy, understanding and real help. These things make the A.A. fellowship the best that we know. Do I fully appreciate the depth of the A.A. fellowship? Meditation For The Day The Higher Power can guide us to the right decisions if we pray about them. We can believe that many details of our lives are planned by God and planned with a wealth of forgiving love for the mistakes we have made. We can pray today to be shown the right way. We can choose the good, and when we choose it, we can feel that the whole power of the universe is behind us. We can achieve a real harmony with God's purpose for our lives. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may choose aright today. I pray that I may be shown the right way to live today. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Compelling Love, p.273 The life of each A.A. and of each group is built around our Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. We know that the penalty for extensive disobedience to these principles is death for the individual and dissolution for the group. But an even greater force for A.A.'s unity is our compelling love for our fellow members and for our principles. ******************************** You might think the people at A.A.'s headquarters in New York would surely have to have some personal authority. But, long ago, trustees and secretaries alike found they could do no more than make very mild suggestions to the A.A. groups. They even had to coin a couple of sentences which still go into half the letters they write: "Of course you are at perfect liberty to handle this matter any way you please. But the majority experience in A.A. does seem to suggest . . ." A.A. world headquarters is not a giver of orders. It is, instead, our largest transmitter of the lessons of experience. 1. Twelve Concepts, p.8 2. 12 & 12, pp. 173-174 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Visualizing Success Optimistic Thinking Some people insist that we must visualize ourselves enjoying success if we ever hope to achieve it. AA says virtually the same about sobriety; in fact, "A Vision for You" is the name of a chapter in Alcoholics Anonymous. There is a lot of talk in AA about projecting into the future and "seeing the worst." It takes far less energy.... and it's far more constructive..... to see ourselves doing our best, in sobriety and in all things. We have rich imaginative powers. Quite often, we used gifts wrongly when we were drinking... we would create dark pictures of our future troubles, particularly in the depressed periods between drinking bouts. In AA., we learn to use those same powers to see ourselves enjoying happy sobriety as well as a secure place in the world. I'm confident that I'm growing in sobriety and building healthy relationships in all of my activities. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Live and Let Live--AA slogan In our addiction, we didn't car. We didn't care about other people, even though we wanted to. We just didn't come through for them in ways that mattered. We didn't care for ourselves. We let bad things happen to us. We didn't care about living. We set no goals, had no fun, smelled no flowers. In our recovery, we do care. We care about others, ourselves, and life. Our spirits are on the move again. There's life in our hearts. Our bodies are getting well. And we're daring to dream. We're living! Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, put some life and energy into me today. Help me love my new life. Action for the Day: Today, I'll focus on being alive. As I breathe in, I'll gather more and more life energy from nature. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Across the fields I can see the radiance of your smile and I know in my heart you are there. But the anguish I am feeling makes the distance so very far to cross. --Deidra Sarault Looking down the hallway of our lives, we sense many uncomfortable corners. And they are there. But through the discomfort comes the ease of understanding. The security that we long for, we discover has been ours all along. All we needed to do was move into the corner--with trust. As we stand before any problems, any new task, any unfamiliar environment, dread may overwhelm us. We stand there alone. But the choice available to us now and always is to invite the spirit of God to share the space we're in. In concert with God's Spirit, no problem or task can be greater than our combined abilities to handle it. Our lives will be eased in direct proportion to our faith that God is there, caring for our every concern, putting before us the experiences we need to grow on. We can let go of our anguish, our doubts and fears. Eternal triumph is ours for the asking. The smiling faces I encounter today--I will let them assure me that all is well. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS PRACTICAL EXPERIENCE shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. This is our twelfth suggestion: Carry this message to other alcoholics! You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Remember they are very ill. p. 89 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. Once I was sober, my wife took me back. I felt that I had to go back to take care of the kids I had once left on welfare. My third son is our A.A. baby. I also got to see all our boys play sports. There were other A.A.'s with kids on the teams, and we would hang around together at the games. I really enjoyed myself. My sobriety baby is now in college. I have beautiful relationships with all my kids. pp. 484-485 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Now comes the biggest question yet. What about the practice of these principles in all our affairs? Can we love the whole pattern of living as eagerly as we do the small segment of it we discover when we try to help other alcoholics achieve sobriety? Can we bring the same spirit of love and tolerance into our sometimes deranged family lives that we bring to our A.A. group? Can we have the same kind of confidence and faith in these people who have been infected and sometimes crippled by our own illness that we have in our sponsors? Can we actually carry the A.A. spirit into our daily work? Can we meet our newly recognized responsibilities to the world at large? And can we bring new purpose and devotion to the religion of our choice? Can we find a new joy of living in trying to do something about all these things? pp. 111-112 ************************************************** ********* Everything I experience serves a purpose. Today, my past is healed; I am alive, awake, and free. I have the courage to change. --Glad Day by Joan Larkin "We live by admiration, hope and love." --William Wordsworth If you judge people, you have no time to love them. --Mother Teresa Every morning you are handed 24 golden hours. They are one of the few things in this world that you get free of charge. If you had all the money in the world, you couldn't buy an extra hour. What will you do with this priceless treasure? --Anonymous An ounce of action is worth a ton of theory. --Friedrich Engels Work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt, and dance like you do when nobody's watching. --Anonymous ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation SUFFERING "Man cannot remake himself without suffering. For he is both the marble and the sculptor." -- Alexis Carrel I know that I have grown through my sufferings. I know that I am able to understand and forgive other people because I have been there, too. I know that I am patient and considerate because of my sufferings. My anguish keeps me "earthed". It stops me from playing God; it teaches me the reality of life that life hurts! It is wonderful, joyous, loving and eventful, but it also hurts. For many years I hid my sufferings and pretended they were not there; the result was loneliness and hypocrisy. God, may my sufferings keep me real. ************************************************** ********* Oh, what a wonderful God we have! How great are his riches and wisdom and knowledge! How impossible it is for us to understand his decisions and his methods! For who can know what the Lord is thinking? Who knows enough to be his counselor? Romans 11:33-34 May God, who gives this patience and encouragement, help you live in complete harmony with each other, each with the attitude of Christ Jesus toward the other. Then all of you can join together with one voice, giving praise and glory to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Romans 15:5-6 For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength. 1 Corinthians 1:25 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If we focus too much on ourselves and the troubles in our lives, it is very difficult to be happy. Lord, refresh my spirit, help me let go of longing to become something I am not and show me how to be the best of who I am. Open your mind and empty your heart of fears so that you can know and experience God to the fullest. Lord, You are my peace, my assurance and the love that I hold on to. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Membership "There is only one requirement for membership, the desire to stop using." Basic Text pg. 9 We all know people who could benefit from Narcotics Anonymous. Many people we encounter from all walks of life - our family members, old friends, and co-workers - could really use a program of recovery in their lives. Sadly, those who need us don't always find their way to our rooms. NA is a program of attraction, not promotion. We are only members when we say we are. We can bring our friends and loved ones to a meeting if they are willing, but we cannot force them to embrace the way of life that has given us freedom from active addiction. Membership in Narcotics Anonymous is a highly personal decision. The choice to become a member is made in the heart of each individual addict. In the long run, coerced meeting attendance doesn't keep too many addicts in our rooms. Only addicts who are still suffering, if given the opportunity, can decide if they are powerless over their addiction. We can carry the message, but we can't carry the addict. Just for today: I am grateful for my decision to become a member of Narcotics Anonymous. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. To heal ourselves is a reclamation of the power we all have as living beings to live in harmony with the life energy and to fulfill our potential as creatures among many on this planet. --Chellis Glendinning We live in a world that tells us healing only comes from outside ourselves. To some, it may seem odd to think each of us has the ability to heal ourselves. How is this possible? Easy--we can do it if we believe we can. Whatever we believe we cannot do will remain beyond our ability. But believing we can heal ourselves gives us access to many healing ways. Self-acceptance is healing. Singing, playing, walking by a river are healing. Even helping others with their problems can be healing to us. There are as many ways of self-healing as there are people in the world. Once we experience what is healing for us, we can go on to discover many more healing acts to share with others. What healing things do I like to do? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Let nothing disturb you. Let nothing frighten you. Everything passes away except God. --Saint Theresa Learning to detach may be the most demanding and difficult part of this program. Detachment means being filled with closeness and love toward someone, yet knowing we cannot fix or protect that person. It means we can be in emotional contact but don't have to react to someone else's issues. We respond from our own center with what is fitting for us. Being detached means we allow others to be in the hands of God because we cannot live their lives for them. Detachment gives us an inner calm, an acceptance of our limits, and the freedom to live our own lives with integrity. Detachment is a skill in living, and like other skills, we can practice it. Gradually, it becomes a natural response. True detachment takes root and grows within us over a period of time as we deepen our relationship with the Steps and with our Higher Power. Today, I turn to God as my eternal rock for strength in learning to become detached. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Across the fields I can see the radiance of your smile and I know in my heart you are there. But the anguish I am feeling makes the distance so very far to cross. --Deidra Sarault Looking down the hallway of our lives, we sense many uncomfortable corners. And they are there. But through the discomfort comes the ease of understanding. The security that we long for, we discover has been ours all along. All we needed to do was move into the corner--with trust. As we stand before any problems, any new task, any unfamiliar environment, dread may overwhelm us. We stand there alone. But the choice available to us now and always is to invite the spirit of God to share the space we're in. In concert with God's Spirit, no problem or task can be greater than our combined abilities to handle it. Our lives will be eased in direct proportion to our faith that God is there, caring for our every concern, putting before us the experiences we need to grow on. We can let go of our anguish, our doubts and fears. Eternal triumph is ours for the asking. The smiling faces I encounter today--I will let them assure me that all is well. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Giving Don't be afraid of giving. For a while, we may need to back off from giving as we learn to discern the difference between healthy giving and caretaking, which leave us feeling victimized and others feeling resentful. This is a temporary spot. To be healthy, to do our part in this spiritual way of life, to be part of the endless cycle of the Universe, guided by our Creator, we need to give and receive. Both parts are important. What is healthy giving? This is a fine lined behavior each of us must seek to understand for ourselves. It is giving that feels good and does not leave us feeling victimized. It is giving that holds the giver and the receiver in high esteem. It is giving based on a desire to do it rather than from a sense of guilt, pity, shame, or obligation. It is giving with no strings attached. Or it is giving based on a clean, direct contract. Whether it is giving our time, efforts, energy, comfort, nurturing, money, or ourselves, it is giving that we can afford. Giving is part of the chain of giving and receiving. We can learn to give in healthy ways; we can learn to give in love. We need to keep an eye on our giving, to make sure it has not crossed the line into caretaking. But we need to learn to give in ways that work for us and others. Today, God, guide me in my giving. Help me give to others in healthy ways. Help me give what feels right, what feels good, what feels clean, and what I can afford. Today I am willing to share all of me with another human being. I am willing to trust that this process will free me from the burdens of my past. I am ready to let go. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Learn to Live with Ambiguity Sometimes, the picture isn’t finished yet. Ideas, possibilities, hopes, dreams float around, circling us like asteroids around a planet. We may think events in our lives are happening aimlessly, without purpose. All we see are disconnected, floating blobs. We reach for them, try to grab them in our hands so we can connect them, force them into a whole, force them into a picture we can see, something that makes sense. Let the pieces be. Let yourself be. Let life be. Sometimes, chaos needs to precede order. The pieces will come together in a picture that makes sense, in a beautiful work of art that pleases. You don’t have to force the pieces to fit together if it’s not time. You don’t have to know. There is power sometimes in not knowing. There is power in letting go. Power is waiting. Power in stillness. Power in trust. There is power in letting the disconnected pieces be until they settle into a whole. The action you are to take will appear. Timely. Clearly. What you’re to do will become clear. Let the pieces be, and they’ll take shape. Soon you’ll see the picture. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Let go of afflicted emotional streams Step out of afflicted streams. I was walking through a national park one day when I came upon a stream. I wasn’t looking closely; I decided to step into the water and walk through it to get to the other side. When I looked more closely, I gasped and stood back. The stream was all murky and gross. I didn’t want to wade in it. Most teachers of our times and from times long past– from the Dalai Lama to Emmet Fox– agree on one things: stay away from murky, afflicted emotional streams. Avoid them at all costs. There’s a lot of afflicted streams out there: greed, envy, negativity, regret, revenge, resentment. arrogance, victimization, hard-heartedness, bitterness, control, hatred, resentment, and paralyzing fear are just a few. When we step into an afflicted emotional stream, that emotion colors everything we do. An afflicted stream is more than an isolated emotion. It’s a position, a posture, an attitude, a pattern that will poison us and our lives. Look around. Be aware. Don’t be careless and step into an afflicted stream. If you’ve inadvertently slipped into one, then quickly step out. Feeling restless, irritable, and discontented is definitely an afflicted stream. If you find yourself in that one, step right out into gratitude God, help me let go of my emotions before that feeling becomes a way of life. Guide my thinking and outlook on life. Keep me out of afflicted streams. *************************************** Greeting the Divine Spirit Bowing by Madisyn Taylor Bowing has the quality of consciously evoking spirit and conveys a sense of reverence for the people involved. Bowing is a universal gesture of respect and reverence. In many cultures, it is the predominant form of social greeting, and most religions incorporate it into their rituals of worship. In many cases, bowing signifies not only respect but also an acknowledgment of the shared divinity between the bower and the recipient. Bowing can also be a turning in toward our own divinity when we bow our heads in prayer, contemplation, or meditation. Bows range in form from a slight forward nod of the head to a full body prostration on the ground, and range in meaning from a simple greeting to a complete giving over of the self to the divine. If you have ever bowed or been on the receiving end of a bow, you know that it is different from a handshake or a hug. Bowing has the quality of consciously evoking spirit and conveys a sense of reverence for the people involved. The word “Namaste,” which accompanies bowing in yoga, actually translates as “The divine spirit in me acknowledges the divine spirit in you.” When we greet one another with this kind of awareness, we can’t help but be more conscious that we are deeply connected to one another and to everyone, because this divine spirit resides in all of us. There are simple bows and complicated bows, and subtle variations carry different meanings depending upon where you are, who you are, and a number of other factors. But we can all practice bowing by simply bringing our two hands together in prayer and pressing the thumb side of our hands lightly into our chests. Keeping a long spine, simply bend your head gently down so that you are looking at the tops of your fingers. Close your eyes and breathe consciously, paying homage to your spirit, the same spirit that resides within all of humanity. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day A friend in The Program told me of a favorite humn from her childhood: “Open my eyes that I may see glimpses of truth Thou hast for me.” In actuality, that is what The Program has done for me — it has opened my eyes so that I have come to see the true nature of my addiction, as well as the true nature of the joyous life that can be mine if I practice the principles embodied in The Program’s Twelve Steps to recovery. Through prayer and meditation, am I also improving my inner vision, so that I can better see God’s love and power working in me and through me? Today I Pray May each glint of truth that I catch sight of as I work the Steps begin to take on the steadier shine of a fixed star. May I know that these stars are all that I need to chart my course and navigate safely. May I no longer feel the frantic need to put in to every unknown port along the way in search of direction. These stars are always rube ti steer by. Today I Will Remember Find the fixed stars and fix on them. *************************************** One More Day ‘Tis a lesson you should heed, Try, try again. If at first you don’t succeed, Try, try again. – William E. Hickson Our teachers told us to try again. Our parents reminded us to try again. And sometimes we even did try again! Usually it was something simple, like recopying poorly written homework. We hardly realized then that we would be carrying that message with us into adulthood. It’s often difficult to listen to good advice; it’s even harder to accept it. When we learn to reassess our goals, to reset priorities, and to be more realistic about where we are really headed, trying again begins to make more sense. Trying again doesn’t always mean doing it over again. It can mean trying something entirely new. It can mean daring to change. Trying again means I give myself room to grow. ***************************************** One Day At A Time THE PAST "Even God cannot change the past." Agathon (ca. 448–400 BC) (Athenian tragic poet and friend of Euripides and Plato, ancient Greek poet) Each day of recovery, I ask my Higher Power to help me stay focused on today. Although there are things I would like to change about the past, I know that it is not possible. I’ve let myself fall into traps, thinking "If only I had done..." or "If only I’d said..." When I think this way, I find myself wasting a lot of time and feeling bad. This doesn’t seem like healthy recovery thinking. If amends need to be made, then I make them. If not, then I let go of the past. Worrying about the past is not productive. Regret will not fix anything. It will merely keep me from concentrating my efforts on where they belong ... on the present moment. One Day at a Time . . . I will stay focused on what is going on around me and leave the past in the past. Teresa S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote On the other hand - and strange as this may seem to those who do not understand - once a psychic change has occurred, the very same person who seemed doomed, who had so many problems he despaired of ever solving them, suddenly finds himself easily able to control his desire for alcohol, the only effort necessary being that he required to follow a few simple rules. - Pg. xxix - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion Hour To Hour - Book - Quote KISS. Keep It Simple Stupid. We are not suggesting you are stupid, but your disease is. It will do anything it can to keep you using even though it ultimately means death of itself along with the body. But through following a few SIMPLE suggestions you can release yourself from the stupidity. May I understand that my stupid disease will argue and complicate simple procedures so it can gain a foothold in the confusion it creates. KISS off addiction. Learning My Own Lessons I recognize today that I am in charge of my own learning. Life is constantly offering up circumstances that are useful in my personal growth. I can move through the situation, live it out, extract the wisdom that is in it or I can ignore the lesson and keep repeating the same painful circumstance over and over again in my life. The deepest and most appropriate things I need to learn in life are generally right in front of me. Life is my guru if I can use it as such. It is rich with subtle learning if I look for it. The gift I can give myself today is becoming aware of what life is trying to teach me. My lessons come from my life. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote At the start of meeting we always ask, 'Is there anybody new or coming back?' We should also ask, 'Is there anybody old and going out?' I remember that the 'still suffering alcoholic' can include old timers too! "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Talk does not cook rice. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I'm willing to share all of me with another human being. I'm willing to trust that this process will free me from the burdens of my past. I am ready to let go. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I thought; 'I won't just read the 4th Step, I'll chant it, like a Greek Tragedy; 'I resent my mother!!' and as I rip the pages out after I chant it, I'll throw it on a fire, signifying the connection between heaven and earth. The smoke and ashes will carry away my sins and my purified soul will be lifted to the heavens.' I didn't mention this to my sponsor, 'cos like I said, he's kind of a rigid guy. So he picks me up and says 'You can start reading now.' And I thought; 'In your Camaro?' - I was going to read the greatest spiritual treatise ever written, in a Camaro? - Chris C. |
December 14
Daily Reflections REACHING OUT Never talk down to an alcoholic from any moral or spiritual hilltop; simply lay out the kit of spiritual tools for his inspection. Show him how they worked with you. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 95 When I come into contact with a newcomer, do I have a tendency to look at him from my perceived angle of success in A.A.? Do I compare him with the large number of acquaintances I have made in the Fellowship? Do I point out to him in a magisterial way the voice of A.A.? What is my real attitude toward him? I must examine myself whenever I meet a newcomer to make sure that I am carrying the message with simplicity, humility and generosity. The one who still suffers from the terrible disease of alcoholism must find in me a friend who will allow him to get to know the A.A. way, because I had such a friend when I arrived in A.A. Today it is my turn to hold out my hand, with love, to my sister or brother alcoholic, and to show her or him the way to happiness. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The way of A.A. is the way of service. Without that, it would not work. We have been "on the wagon" and hated it. We have taken the pledge and waited for the time to be up with impatience. We have tried in all manner of ways to help ourselves. But not until we begin to help other people do we get full relief. It is an axiom that the A.A. program has to be given away in order to be kept. A river flows into the Dead Sea and stops. A river flows into a clear pool and flows out again. We get and then we give. If we do not give, we do not keep. Have I given up all ideas of holding A.A. for myself alone? Meditation For The Day Try to see the life of the spirit as a calm place, shut away from the turmoil of the world. Think of your spiritual home as a place full of peace, serenity, and contentment. Go to this quiet, meditative place for the strength to carry you through today's duties and problems. Keep coming back here for refreshment when you are weary of the hubbub of the outside world. From this quietness and communion comes our strength. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may keep this resting place where I can commune with God. I pray that I may find refreshment in meditation on the Eternal. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It After the "Honeymoon", p. 216 "For most of us, the first years of A.A. are something like a honeymoon. There is a new and potent reason to stay alive, joyful activity aplenty. For a time, we are diverted from the main life problems. That is all to the good. "But when the honeymoon has worn off, we are obliged to take our lumps, like other people. This is where the testing starts. Maybe the group has pushed us onto the side lines. Maybe difficulties have intensified at home, or in the world outside. Then the old behavior patterns reappear. How well we recognize and deal with them reveals the extent of our progress." ******************************** The wise have always known that no one can make much of his life until self-searching becomes a regular habit, until he is able to admit and accept what he finds, and until he patiently and persistently tries to correct what is wrong. 1. Letter, 1954 2. 12 & 12, p. 88 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The best of the Past Living today. We're told that we should forget the past when we come into AA. Since we can't change it, we should not waste time and energy reliving it. Let's be careful, however, not to take this advice too literally. There was much in our past that was good, even when we were drinking. We have a right and a need to treasure these important things. The real dangers of living in the past come either from brooding about its mistakes or from thinking that our best days are already behind us. We can think of the past as a foundation for the good we expect today and in all the days ahead. I'll preserve the best in my memories of the past, knowing that these helped bring me to my present state of recovery. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Hold fast to dreams for if dreams die, life is broken winged bird that cannot fly. --Langston Hughes Many of our dreams died as our addiction got worse. We felt the loss but couldn't speak it. With recovery, we regain our ability to dream. Dreams of sharing our lives with family and friends return. They push out thoughts of getting high. Dreams of pride and self-respect reappear. They replace the awful feeling of shame. Like the quote above says, "Hold fast to dreams...." Our dreams are our wishes for the future. They hold a picture of who we want to be. In our dreams, we let our spirits soar. Often, we fell close to God, others and ourselves. Thanks God, we can dream again. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thanks to you, my wings have been mended. Guide me as I fly. Action for the Day: Today, I'll take time out to dream and share my dream with those I love. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning A theme may seem to have been put aside, but it keeps returning--the same thing modulated, somewhat changed in form. --Muriel Rukeyser No struggle we have is really new. It's another shade of the struggle that plagued us last week or perhaps last year. And we'll stumble again and again until we learn to quit struggling. The trying situations at work, or the personality type that irritates us, will always exist. But when we've come to accept as good and growth-enhancing all situations and all persons, we'll sense the subtle absence of struggle. We'll realize that the person we couldn't tolerate has become a friend. The situation we couldn't handle is resolved, forever. The lessons we need to learn keep presenting themselves, until we've finished the homework. If we sense a struggle today, we can look at it as an assignment, one that is meant for our growth. We can remember that our struggles represent our opportunities to grow. Fortunately, the program has given us a tutor. We have a willing teacher to help us. We need to move on, to be open to other assignments. No problem will be too much for us to handle. I will enjoy my role as student today. I will be grateful for all opportunities to grow. They make possible my very special contribution in this life. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Life will take on new meaning. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends—this is an experience you must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it. Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives. p. 89 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. Pushed by my sponsor, I got into service work right away, and I really enjoyed it. Now I'm a general service representative of a Spanish-speaking group, learning how to express myself about this great gift of sobriety in my original language. p. 485 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Furthermore, how shall we come to terms with seeming failure or success? Can we now accept and adjust to either without despair or pride? Can we accept poverty, sickness, loneliness, and bereavement with courage and serenity? Can we steadfastly content ourselves with the humbler, yet sometimes more durable, satisfactions when the brighter, more glittering achievements are denied us? The A.A. answer to these questions about living is "Yes, all of these things are possible." We know this because we see monotony, pain, and even calamity turned to good use by those who keep on trying to practice A.A.'s Twelve Steps. And if these are facts of life for the many alcoholics who have recovered in A.A., they can become the facts of life for many more. p. 112 ************************************************** ********* In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him. --Dereke Bruce "Life is short, and we have never too much time for gladdening the hearts of those who are traveling the dark journey with us. Oh, be swift to love, make haste to be kind." --Henri Frederic Amiel "The human spirit rings with hope at the sound of an encouraging word. --unknown "Many a good man has failed because he had his wishbone where his backbone should have been." --Unknown The first step identifies the problem, the remaining eleven steps are the solution. The first tradition identifies the problem, the remaining eleven traditions are how we do that. --unknown "Every situation can be a positive situation if you look upon it as an opportunity for growth and self-improvement." --Brian Tracy "Step into a new you each day. Reach out to greater health, happiness, fitness, friendship, love and greater pride in yourself." --Mark Victor Hansen Every recovery from alcoholism began with one sober hour. Life didn't end when I got sober -- it started. H E A L = Helping Every Alcoholic Live. Take a walk with God. He will meet you at the Steps. ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation GOD "My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me." -- Jesus (Matthew 27:46) In my sickness I was often angry at God. Angry that He did not do what I wanted Him to do when I wanted Him to do it. I was a spoiled child. I refused to understand that suffering could be an important part of my spiritual growth. Today I know this to be true. The biggest part of my suffering, then and today, is the feeling of isolation. Not knowing for certain that He hears me. Not understanding completely what His will is for me. Not getting clear answers to my daily confusion. The doubt is part of the faith. The "not knowing" is the answer. Lord, may the daily doubts lead to a creative faith. ************************************************** ********* "All things work together for good to them that love God." Romans 8:28 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9 "Seek the LORD and live." Amos 5:6a ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Laughter is a speedy way to bring people together, build friendships and reduce stresses. Lord, help me participate in the many opportunities to feel the calming effect of laughter. It is good to know where you are, but better to know where you are going. Lord, may I use every day to grow closer to You. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Addiction, Drugs, And Recovery "Addiction is a physical, mental, and spiritual disease that affects every area of our lives." Basic Text pg. 20 Before we started using, most of us had a stereotype, a mental image of what addicts were supposed to look like. Some of us pictured a junkie robbing convenience markets for drug money. Others imagined a paranoid recluse peering at life from behind perpetually drawn drapes and locked doors. As long as we didn't fit any of the stereotypes, we thought, we couldn't be addicts. As our using progressed, we discarded those misconceptions about addiction, only to come up with another: the idea that addiction was about drugs. We may have thought addiction meant a physical habit, believing any drug that didn't produce physical habituation was not "addictive." Or we thought the drugs we took were causing all our problems. We thought that merely getting rid of the drugs would restore sanity to our lives. One of the most important lessons we learn in Narcotics Anonymous is that addiction is much more than the drugs we used. Addiction is a part of us; it's an illness that involves every area of our lives, with or without drugs. We can see its effects on our thoughts, our feelings, and our behavior, even after we stop using. Because of this, we need a solution that works to repair every area of our lives: the Twelve Steps. Just for today: Addiction is not a simple disease, but it has a simple solution. Today, I will live in that solution: the Twelve Steps of recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Each day comes bearing its gifts. Untie the ribbons. --Ann Ruth Schabacker Today will be filled with surprises, big ones and small ones, like the gifts at a birthday party. Maybe we'll see a friend we haven't seen for a while. Or we'll find something we thought was lost. Whatever happens today will be special, and is meant to help us grow in just the right way. Growing up doesn't always feel easy. We're expected to be more responsible and thoughtful of others. We're expected to be honest about our feelings and needs. If we're angry or scared, we need to tell someone. Sharing our secret about being afraid relieves us of the fear, and we feel lighter, happier, like after opening a special gift. When I receive today's gifts, will I stop to appreciate them? You are reading from the book Touchstones. No matter how old you get, if you can keep the desire to be creative, you're keeping the man-child alive. --John Cassavetes Creation is the work of God. It is not given to most of us to be famous artists. But the spiritual experience of being creative is open to us when we take on a creative attitude toward what we are doing. We might do this on the job when we determine to do more than just get the job done. We may decide to have fun while we do what needs to be done, or we may decide to put our best spirit into the work before us. Some men find creativity in working with wood, others in coaching sports with children, someone else in cooking, and another in community service. Being creative moves us toward wholeness as people. As we create on the outside, we are being created on the inside. The way in which we live every aspect of our lives is a creative, growing process and a partnership with God. As I approach this day, I will have an attitude of creativity that will nurture the wondering child within me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. A theme may seem to have been put aside, but it keeps returning--the same thing modulated, somewhat changed in form. --Muriel Rukeyser No struggle we have is really new. It's another shade of the struggle that plagued us last week or perhaps last year. And we'll stumble again and again until we learn to quit struggling. The trying situations at work, or the personality type that irritates us, will always exist. But when we've come to accept as good and growth-enhancing all situations and all persons, we'll sense the subtle absence of struggle. We'll realize that the person we couldn't tolerate has become a friend. The situation we couldn't handle is resolved, forever. The lessons we need to learn keep presenting themselves, until we've finished the homework. If we sense a struggle today, we can look at it as an assignment, one that is meant for our growth. We can remember that our struggles represent our opportunities to grow. Fortunately, the program has given us a tutor. We have a willing teacher to help us. We need to move on, to be open to other assignments. No problem will be too much for us to handle. I will enjoy my role as student today. I will be grateful for all opportunities to grow. They make possible my very special contribution in this life. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Clear Thinking Strive for clear thinking. Many of us have had our thinking clouded by denial. Some of us have even lost faith in ourselves because we've spent a degree of time in denial. But losing faith in our thinking isn't going to help us. What we need to lose faith in is denial. We didn't resort to denial - either of someone else's problem or our own - because we were deficient. Denial, the shock absorber for the soul, protects us until we are equipped to cope with reality. Clear thinking and recovery don't mean we will never resort to denial. Denial is the first step toward acceptance, and for most of our life, we will be striving to accept something. Clear thinking means we don't allow ourselves to become immersed in negativity or unrealistic expectations. We stay connected to other recovering people. We go to our meetings, where peace of mind and realistic support are available. We work the Steps, pray, and meditate. We keep our thinking on track by asking our Higher Power to help us think clearly - not by expecting Him, or someone else, to do our thinking for us. Today, I will strive for balanced, clear thought in all areas of my life. Today I can look back with love in my heart, knowing that every moment, every experience of my life has been necessary, valuable and significant. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Open Your Heart to Universal Love We live in a magical, living, vital, and personal universe, a world where universal love is real. We don’t just live in it, we’re part of it, visibly and tangibly connected to it. The phone call that comes at the right time. A book that teaches us what we need to know. A movie that has the message we need to guide us and open our hearts. An opportunity that arises, at just the right moment. An idea triggered by something someone says or an object we didn’t notice before. The more we open to universal love, the more it will be there for us, embracing, loving, holding, guiding us. The more we learn to see it, the more it will be there– until we wonder why we never saw it before. Open your heart to universal love. It’s more than merely there. It’s there for you. Jump into the arms of a living, magical world and you leap into the arms of universal love. See how real it can be. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go You’re not a survivor anymore Many years ago, I asked a fellow therapist what the one thing was that hallmarked the unhappy state of being many of us have come to label as codependency. “It’s the Karpman Drama Triangle,” he said. “People rescue someone by doing something they don’t want to do, or it’s not their business to do. Then they get angry and persecute the person. Then they walk away, feeling like a victim. Again.” A light when on in that moment. Like a gerbil on a wheel, I could see myself spinning around this triangle. I was regularly rescuing somebody, then getting angry, and ultimately feeling victimized by it all. I was creating the pain and the drama in my life. Over the years, I stopped rescuing alcoholics. Many of us have gotten off that painful wheel. We know we can’t control another person’s chemical dependency, depression, problems, or life. But we may have stepped off that wheel and gotten ourselves into another more subtle drama spin. A friend recently cleaned our his entire house– closets, garage, drawers. He had to hire a truck to come and take everything away. “I can’t believe everything I collected and hung onto,” he said. “Most of it was junk that I didn’t want in the first place. I guess that came from being poor and going without for so long. I convinced myself that if it was free or cheap, I’d better grab it and take it home.” Many of us were survivors at one time. We either genuinely didn’t have a choice or convinced ourselves we didn’t. So we clung to whoever and whatever came along our path. You may have survived what you went through, but you’re not a survivor anymore. There is no need to desperately cling to whatever comes along. You’re living now. You’re living fully and freely. Choose what you want. God, help me give myself permission to walk a path with heart. *************************************** People in Need Taking Our Turn to Give by Madisyn Taylor The greatest gift we can give to somebody in need is giving awareness and without judgment. When we see a person in need, we may want to give them something as a way of helping them, but if we give without taking the time to see who they really are, honoring that most of all, our gift is nowhere near as powerful as it could be. We may want to give a homeless person a sandwich, for example, but if we give it without also taking a moment to look the person in the eye, making authentic contact, we rob them of the experience of being human. Being in a position of need leaves a lot of people feeling vulnerable and full of self-doubt. The greatest gift we can give is to meet people in need without judgment and with the awareness that we are not superior to them simply because we are not currently in their position. If we take the long view, we can see that we all began life in need of a lot of care and attention, and many of us end life in the same way. Giving and receiving are companion energies that take turns throughout our lives, and we all get a chance to be on both sides of the exchange from time to time. It’s important to be aware of our own tendency to give from a desire to feel good about ourselves, rather than from an acknowledgement of our connection to all people. Letting go of our self-importance allows us to see that, regardless of appearances, we are all givers and receivers. When we are in the position of the giver, we honor those we are helping when we remember the many people who have helped us. Then we can look the person we are helping in the eye, aware that we are making contact with a human being who is our equal. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Some of us in The Program are inclined to make the mistake of thinking that the few moments we spend in prayer and meditation — in “talking to God” — are all that count. The truth is that the attitude we maintain throughou7t the entire day is just as important. If we place ourselves in God’s hands in the morning, and throughout the day hold ourselves ready to accept His will as it is made known through the events of our daily life, our attitude of acceptance becomes a constant prayer. Can I try to cultivate an attitude of total acceptance each day? Today I Pray May I maintain contact with my Higher Power all through my day, not just check in for a prayer now and then. May my communion with God never become merely a casual aside. May I come to know that every time I do something that is in accord with God’s will I am living a prayer. Today I Will Remember Prayer is an attitude. *************************************** One More Day I am just a heartbeat away from loneliness. – Laura Palmer The holiday season can be difficult for anyone who has had a major life change. A person who has been widowed, has moved, or has had to deal with new physical limitations may become lonesome when each holiday, birthday, or anniversary rolls around. We sometimes cause ourselves pain by isolating ourselves. We may feel that no one wants to share the holiday with us or that we don’t wish to impose the inconvenience of illness upodn friends. By reminding ourselves of the meaning of these special days, we often find that we can move out of our isolation. Holidays and other occasions reaffirm the value of tradition, love, and family. These days compel us to remember our place within a welcoming circle of friends and family. I can choose to reach out during the holidays — or any day. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~CHANGE~ To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable. Helen Keller As far back as I can remember, I have always been fearful of change. I preferred to stay in my comfort zone, even when it became uncomfortable or painful. I suppose that was why I stayed in the disease for so long; it was what I knew. It was safe and predictable and I didn't have to deal with painful emotions such as loss and rejection. This was also why I stayed so long in a bad marriage; I was terrified of what was outside the walls of my dysfunctional relationship. In truth, I didn't really live, because fear of change prevented me from forming new relationships and doing new and exciting things. Even the move from one city to another was totally traumatic, because the old and familiar was what I knew, not because it was better. Even then, I spent so long looking at the closed door behind me that I failed to see the open door in front of me. I know now that even when I fear change, I need only put one foot in front of the other, and do what is before me. Because I now have faith that my Higher Power will be with me every step of the way, I need only ask for help, and the help comes. Even though it still is not easy, I am aware of how many changes I have been able to make with the help of my Higher Power. In the past, I spent so much time obsessing about the outcome that I talked myself out of the change I was thinking of making. The biggest change that has happened for me is my newfound faith which enables me to take that leap into the unknown. There have been other miraculous changes too. Now I have a more open and honest relationship with my children and others because I am able to take more risks and set boundaries, which I had never been able to do before. I have changed careers, undertaken flying overseas on my own, and in general am not the scared person I used to be. I also have a whole new family of wonderful friends in this fellowship who understand me and love me always. One Day at a Time . . . I continue to grow and change as God wills me to do, and I will not be afraid because I know that He will always be there to guide and help me. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote My friend had emphasized the absolute necessity of demonstrating these principles in all my affairs. Particularly was it imperative to work with others as he had worked with me. Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then faith would be dead indeed. With us it is just like that. - Pgs. 14-15 - Bill's Story Hour To Hour - Book - Quote We can never get enough of what we really do not want. We don't really want drugs, we want what we hope they'll bring us, wholeness, satisfaction, escape from pain. God, as I understand You, let me see what I really want. Spirit Calls Spirit calls to me within and without. In a still, small voice I sense spirit whispering in my inner ear. My body feels an increasing sense of aliveness as I invite spirit to make itself known to me. I do not even need to make room for spirit, because spirit breathes in each pore within me. It fills the numbness with energy. It fills the emptiness and causes my cup to overflow with its presence. There are gifts in listening if I am willing to sense, hear and see them, lessons I can learn. Little hints that help me to appreciate what I already have and open myself to experiencing more. I will look for evidence of spirit at work in my life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote There is no completion for the circle of recovery. A circle has no beginning and no end. It is suggested that recovery begins when you have learned enough from those before you and pass it along to those behind. Love is the process that keeps the circle moving. Standing hand in hand or arm in arm after a meeting I absorb the love that travels our circle of recovery. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book To the desolate alcoholic, the act of kindness can be the difference between getting 'better' or getting 'bitter.' Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I can look back with love in my heart, knowing that every moment, every experience of my life has been necessary, valuable and significant. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Using will power to control drinking is about as effective as using will power on diarrhea. - Steve M. |
December 15
Daily Reflections DOING ANYTHING TO HELP Offer him [the alcoholic] friendship and fellowship. Tell him that if he wants to get well you will do anything to help. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 95 I remember how attracted I was to the two men from A.A. who Twelfth-Stepped me. They said I could have what they had, with no conditions attached, that all I had to do was make my own decision to join them on the pathway to recovery. When I start convincing a newcomer to do things my way, I forget how helpful those two men were to me in their open-minded generosity. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Service to others makes the world a good place. Civilization would cease if all of us were always and only for ourselves. We alcoholics have a wonderful opportunity to contribute to the well-being of the world. We have a common problem. We find a common answer. We are uniquely equipped to help others with the same problem. What a wonderful world it would be if everybody took their own greatest problem and found the answer to it and spent the rest of their lives helping others with the same problem, in their spare time. Soon we would have the right kind of a world. Do I appreciate my unique opportunity to be of service? Meditation For The Day Today can be lived in the consciousness of God's contact, upholding you in all good thoughts, words and deeds. If sometimes there seems to be a shadow on your life and you feel out of sorts, remember that this is not the withdrawal of God's presence, but only your own temporary unwillingness to realize it. The quiet gray days are the days for doing what you must do, but know that the consciousness of God's nearness will return and be with you again, when the gray days are past. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may face the dull days with courage. I pray that I may have faith that the bright days will return. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It A.A. In Two Words, p.271 "All A.A. progress can be reckoned in terms of just two words: humility and responsibility. Our whole spiritual development can be accurately measured by our degree of adherence to these magnificent standards. "Ever deepening humility, accompanied by an ever greater willingness to accept and to act upon clear-cut obligations--these are truly our touchstones for all growth in the life of the spirit. They hold up to us the very essence of right being and right doing. It is by them that we are enabled to find and to do God's will." Talk, 1965 (Printed In Grapevine, January 1966) ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Watching our boundaries. Personal relationships Setting boundaries in personal relationships is how we manage actions that could otherwise get out of control. One firm boundary in AA, for example, is maintaining other members' anonymity, as well as our own. We are always overstepping boundaries if we disclose another's AA membership without permission. It's wise, too, not to expect the easy familiarity of the meetings to carry over into all other activities. One member who was employed by another AA member apparently wondered why his boss was so easygoing and cordial at AA meetings and so remote and businesslike in the factory. It made perfect sense, however; their relationship in the plant was different from their AA relationship and required another set of boundaries. We can protect ourselves and others by being careful to establish proper boundaries for all relationships. This means that what's appropriate for one setting may not be for another. I'll check to be sure that I'm observing proper boundaries, for myself and others. I must not violate others' rights any more than I want my own violated. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple As ass is beautiful to an ass, and a pig to a pig.-- English proverb. When we see someone drunk and out of control, can we see the beautiful person inside them? If we can't, who will? Step Twelve reminds us that we have to help the alcoholic or other drug addict who suffers. This task has been given to us because we, most of all, should be able to look past the drunkenness and see the person. We were there. We know what it's like to be trapped in a world without meaning. If these memories have faded, we may need to go back over Step One. We may find ourselves angry with the practicing drunk or other drug addict. This is a sign that we have gotten too far from our past. Remember, "But for the grace of God..." Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, Help me remember my past and what it's like now. This helps me care about the person who still suffers. Action for the Day: Today, I'll respect my illness. I'll look for the beauty inside every drunk and other drug addict. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Happiness is a form of freedom, and of all people I should be the freest. I've earned this happiness and this freedom. --Angela L. Wozniak Life is a process, and we are progressing beautifully. We are no longer abusing our bodies and minds with drugs. We are taking special time, daily, to look for guidance. We are working the Steps of the program, better and better as the abstinent days add up. We are free from past behaviors. And we can be free from our negative attitudes too. Making a decision to look for the good in our experiences and in our friends and acquaintances frees us from so much frustration. It ushers in happiness, no only for us but for the others we are treating agreeably. Happiness is a byproduct of living the right kind of life. We can take a moment today, each time an action is called for, to consider our response. The one that squares with our inner selves and feels good, is the right one. Happiness will accompany it. Happiness is always within my power. My attitude is at the helm. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Perhaps you are not acquainted with any drinkers who want to recover. You can easily find some by asking a few doctors, ministers, priests or hospitals. They will be only too glad to assist you. Don’t start out as an evangelist or reformer. Unfortunately a lot of prejudice exists. You will be handicapped if you arouse it. Ministers and doctors are competent and you can learn much from them if you wish, but it happens that because of your own drinking experience you can be uniquely useful to other alcoholics. So cooperate; never criticize. To be helpful is our only aim. p. 89 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. There have been some hard times too during these years of sobriety. When I was five years sober, the daughter who drove me to the treatment program and helped me get admitted disappeared. My A.A. friends helped me search for her, but she has never been found. Her mother and I raised her three daughters. I did not have to take a drink. I went to alot of meeting to relieve the pain. When I lost a second daughter to cancer a few years ago, I did the same thing. p. 485 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Of course all A.A.'s, even the best, fall far short of such achievements as a consistent thing. Without necessarily taking that first drink, we often get quite far off the beam. Our troubles sometimes begin with indifference. We are sober and happy in our A.A. work. Things go well at home and office. We naturally congratulate ourselves on what later proves to be a far too easy and superficial point of view. We temporarily cease to grow because we feel satisfied that there is no need for all of A.A.'s Twelve Steps for us. We are doing fine on a few of them. Maybe we are doing fine on only two of them, the First Step and that part of the Twelfth where we "carry the message." In A.A. slang, that blissful state is known as "two-stepping." And it can go on for years. pp. 112-113 ************************************************** ********* Too often we under estimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. --Leo Buscaglia He who speaks sows, and he who listens harvests. --Argentinean Proverb God is my compass, may I follow direction. --Shelley "Don't dwell on what went wrong. Instead, focus on what to do next. Spend your energies on moving forward toward finding the answer." --Denis Waitley "The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem." --Theodore Rubin ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation POVERTY "The poor you always have with you." -- Jesus (John 12:8) Whoever said that life was going to be easy? A great number of people are placed in circumstances that are beyond their control and they die in helpless poverty. The poor are always with us. I cannot understand this dilemma and I have few answers for most of the world's suffering. However, I have a faith in God's love being realized beyond the grave for everyone. But many of "the poor" are spiritually destitute by their own making. They choose to live lives that are consistently destructive and they refuse to change. Alcoholics and drug addicts are committing suicide by their lifestyle! I know because for years I was one. This produces a spiritual poverty that need not remain. This is a poverty that can be overcome. Recovery is finding the hidden treasure that is within. Let me find Your treasure in the loving care I give myself. ************************************************** ********* Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13 "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our affliction so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For just as the sufferings of Christ are ours in abundance, so also our comfort is abundant through Christ." 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." I Corinthians 10:13 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Add excitement to the day by meeting everything as though it is your very first time. Lord, give me the ability to change the ordinary into something special, to do more than just slide through the moments of the day and take time to notice that my life really is terrific most of the time. We have two ends; one for sitting and one for thinking. My success depends on which one I use more. Lord, grant me the determination and the necessary energy that I need to accomplish my goals for today and for my future. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Joy Of Sharing "There is a spiritual principle of giving away what we have been given in Narcotics Anonymous in order to keep it. By helping others to stay clean, we enjoy the benefit of the spiritual wealth that we have found." Basic Text pg. 47 Time and again in our recovery, others have freely shared with us what was freely shared with them. Perhaps we were the recipients of a Twelfth Step call. Maybe someone picked us up and took us to our first meeting. It could be that someone bought us dinner when we were new. All of us have been given time, attention, and love by our fellow members. We may have asked someone, "What can I do to repay you?" And the answer we received was probably a suggestion that we do the same for a newer member when we were able. As we maintain our clean time and recovery, we find ourselves wanting to do for others the things that someone did for us, and happy that we can. If we heard the message while in a hospital or institution, we can join our local H&I subcommittee. Perhaps we can volunteer on the NA help line. Or we can give of our time, attention, and love to a newcomer we are trying to help. We've been given much in our recovery. One of the greatest of these gifts is the privilege of sharing with others what's been shared with us, with no expectation of reward. It's a joy to find we have something that can be of use to others, and that joy is multiplied when we share it. Today we can do so, freely and gratefully. Just for today: I have been given much in my recovery, and I am deeply grateful for it. I will take joy in being able to share it with others as freely as it was shared with me. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Great symphonies begin with just one note. --Priscilla Young Pratt Sometimes it's really hard to get going. We put off things we don't want to do, or are afraid to try. We occasionally feel overwhelmed by the size of a job to be done like cleaning out the cellar or reading a long book for a class. But think a minute. If Beethoven had thought about how complicated it was to write his Ninth Symphony, with all those instruments and voices and notes to blend together, do we really think he would ever have started? But he didn't get overwhelmed. He sat down and wrote just one small note, and then another, and a third. It took him months, but writing one note led to a second, and, one note at a time, he completed it. We begin the same way with whatever tasks we have ahead of us. Each tiny bit of progress helps us go on to the next part. We begin by reading one page of that book, or taking one box of junk from the cellar. That's all we have to do. The rest will follow almost on its own. The trick is to begin. What needs to be done today, and how do I start? You are reading from the book Touchstones. My mother was dead for five years before I knew that I loved her very much. --Lillian Hellman Each day it helps us to remember that we are always changing. Whatever is most clear to us today or is most prominent in our feelings - the difficulties we may be having with parents, wives or lovers, the worries we have about our children - is a part of an unfolding of events we cannot foresee. Just when we think we know exactly the direction things are going, they surprise us with change. Relationships continue to evolve and mature as we do. Even when separated from loved ones, our relationships may improve because we continue to grow. Our task for this day is to be honest with ourselves, to be respectful to others, and to stay open to our Higher Power. Continuing to go forward, we put one foot in front of the other. We are changing internally, and circumstances around us are changing too. We remain hopeful for the future because outcomes are in the hands of God. I cannot predict the direction of my growth. I will simply remain true to myself today and stay open for surprises. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Happiness is a form of freedom, and of all people I should be the freest. I've earned this happiness and this freedom. --Angela L. Wozniak Life is a process, and we are progressing beautifully. We are no longer abusing our bodies and minds with drugs. We are taking special time, daily, to look for guidance. We are working the Steps of the program, better and better as the abstinent days add up. We are free from past behaviors. And we can be free from our negative attitudes too. Making a decision to look for the good in our experiences and in our friends and acquaintances frees us from so much frustration. It ushers in happiness, no only for us but for the others we are treating agreeably. Happiness is a byproduct of living the right kind of life. We can take a moment today, each time an action is called for, to consider our response. The one that squares with our inner selves and feels good, is the right one. Happiness will accompany it. Happiness is always within my power. My attitude is at the helm. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Feelings It's okay to have and feel our feelings - all of them. Years into recovery, we may still be battling with ourselves about this issue. Of all the prohibitions we've lived with, this one is potentially the most damaging and the most long-lived. Many of us needed to shut down the emotional part of ourselves to survive certain situations. We shut down the part of us that feels anger, sadness, fear, joy, and love. We may have turned off our sexual or sensual feelings too. Many of us lived in systems with people who refused to tolerate our emotions. We were shamed or reprimanded for expressing feelings, usually by people who were taught to repress their own. But times have changed. It is okay now for us to acknowledge and accept our emotions. We don't need to allow our emotions to control us; neither do we need to allow our emotions to control us; neither do we need to rigidly repress our feelings. Our emotional center is a valuable part of us. It's connected to our physical well being, our thinking, and our spirituality. Our feelings are also connected to that great gift, instinct. They enable us to give and receive love. We are neither weak nor deficient for indulging in our feelings. It means we're becoming healthy and whole. Today, I will allow myself to recognize and accept whatever feelings pass through me. Without shame, I will tune in to the emotional part of myself. Today I am experiencing all of my life. It is exciting to be alive in each moment. written by ~ Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Awaken Your Life Force The Chinese call it chi. The Japanese,ki. It refers to energy, the life force, the Divine spirit of life that permeates all that is. That permeates you. Awaken your life force. Do things that stimulate it, bring it alive. Walk on the ground with your bare feet and let the earth’s energy surge through you. Reach your hands toward the heavens and let Divine energy come down to you. Move around. Release the blocks.Feel. Love. Sing. Shout. Come alive. Discover what it means to become vital and fully alive. Feel the life force surge through you, up through your legs, your spine, your head. Feel it wash down upon you through your arms, your torso, down through your toes and into the ground, rooting you to this planet like a tree. Know you have roots. Know you have branches. Fill yourself with chi. Fill yourself until you feel vital, alive. Feel it until you become happy and joyful, grateful to be alive on this planet. Feel it until you know you are one with God, one with life, one with love. Feel it until you see how connected you are with all that lives. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Fall in love with life I was sitting in the chair at the beauty shop getting my hair cut one day and listening to my beautician chatter away. She showed me a picture of one of her friends, a woman who had gotten married and recently had a baby girl. “She’s been so in love since that child was born,” she said, showing me a picture of the new mother’s smiling face. “In love with her husband?” I asked. “No,” she said. “Well, that,too. I mean in love with life.” Have you ever been in love, had your heart best fast when you anticipated the call of your lover, felt the way the sun felt warmer on your face, the sky appeared bluer, the clouds more fluffy, and the sunset more grand? What if you could fall in love with your life and feel that way each day? I’m not saying romantic relationships are bad. They’re not. They’re part of being human and getting our needs met. But what if we could take all that passion and focus it into falling in love with life? Maybe that is what is meant by universal love. Maybe that’s the part we give back. Fall in love with your life today. God, help me feel passionate about my life and all the possibilities that stretch out before me. *************************************** Focused Value Quality Vs. Quantity We live in an age of quantity. The media shapes us with the notion that larger, faster, and more are often synonymous with better. We are told that we need to find more time, more possessions, and more love to be truly happy. A smaller quantity of anything that is high in quality will almost always be more satisfying. A single piece of our favorite chocolate or a thin spread of freshly made preserves can satisfy us more than a full bucket of a product that we aren’t very fond of. Similarly, one fulfilling experience can eclipse many empty moments strung together. It is not the quantity of time that matters, but the quality that you experience during each moment. Every minute is an opportunity to love yourself and others, develop confidence and self-respect, and exhibit courage. Ultimately, quality can make life sweeter. When you focus on quality, all your life experiences can be meaningful. A modest portion of good, healthy food can nourish and satisfy you on multiple levels and, when organically grown, nourish the earth as well. Likewise, a few hours of deep, restful slumber will leave you feeling more refreshed than a night’s worth of frequently interrupted sleep. A few minutes spent with a loved one catching up on the important details about family, work, or community can carry more meaning than two hours spent watching television together. Often, in the pursuit of quantity we cheat ourselves of quality. Then again, quantity also plays a significant role in our lives. Certain elements, such as hugs, kisses, abundance, and love, are best had in copious amounts that are high in quality. But faced with the choice between a single, heartfelt grin and a lifetime of empty smiles, most would, no doubt, choose the former. Ultimately, it is not how much you live or have or do but what you make of each moment that counts. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Some people are such worriers that they worry about the fact that they have nothing to worry about. Newcomers in The Program sometimes feel, for example, “This is much too good to last.” Most of us, however, have plenty of real things to worry about — old standbys like money, health, death and taxes, to name just a few. But The Program tells us that the proven antidote to worry and fear is confidence — confidence not in ourselves, but in our Higher Power. Will I continue to believe that God can and will avert the calamity that I spend my days and nights dreading? Will I believe that if calamity does strike, God will enable me to see it through? Today I Pray May I realize that the worry habit — worry that grows out of broader, often unlabeled fears — will take more than time to conquer. Like many dependent people, I have lived with worry so long that it has become my constant, floor-pacing companion. May my Higher Power teach me that making a chum out of worry is a waste of my energy and fritters away my constructive hours. Today I Will Remember Kick the worry habit. *************************************** One More Day The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none. – Thomas Carlyle We really know that we are not perfect. We are, like everyone else, beings capable of millions of behaviors. We can develop a humble self-awareness that takes all of our pluses and minuses into account. When we examine ourselves gently, but honestly, we find ourselves in a position where we can correct our own faults and become more tolerant and accepting of the faults of others. The unconditional love we give ourselves — and everyone we care for — isn’t blind to imperfection; instead, it openly accepts strengths and weaknesses. Today, my love of myself and others will be shown in my tolerance of imperfections. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ACCOMPLISHMENT~ The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves. Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous The one thing that I am absolutely certain of today is that our Creator, God, lives in my heart and works miracles in my life daily. The biggest miracle, I believe, is having an awareness of Him, and knowing that He is in control of all that happens in my life. His power is infinite. If I were not aware of God, then I don't believe I could work this program. It is the realization that God can accomplish anything that is helping me to work daily toward achieving my goal of continued abstinence and a changed attitude regarding food. I cannot change what's in my heart, but God can. I cannot, of myself, break lifelong habits, but God can motivate me to change. I cannot forgive myself all the pain I've inflicted on myself and others, while suffering from this disease, but God can soften my heart, and help me to forgive by letting me know that He forgives me. There is nothing that I can't accomplish when I take God's hand and let Him lead me. One Day at a Time . . . I will let God guide me into an ever-deepening relationship with Him so that I may accomplish the great feat of arresting my compulsion to overeat. Joycelyn ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We doctors have realized for a long time that some form of moral psychology was of urgent importance to alcoholics, but it's application presented difficulties beyond our conception. What with our ultra-modern standards, our scientific approach to everything, we are perhaps not well equipped to apply the powers of good that lie outside our synthetic knowledge. - Pg. xxvii - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Whatever time it is that we are reading this, we may feel anxious about what the rest of the day will bring. But our program is a 'now' program. Later will bring what later will bring, right now we're clean and sober! I will meditate briefly on the phrase 'Be Here Now' to better understand my new way of life. Being in the Moment Today, I see that the only real point of power is in the present, which is to say that life cannot be lived backward or forward, but only in the context of today. If I truly let myself have this moment and all that it contains, I will be in quiet possession of great eternal wealth. All that is, is in this moment where all the waters meet and all the wisdom of the ages lies; it is the now that calls me to it with open arms. I work out my past, not because it is right or good or proper, but because it allows me to be in fuller possession of my present. By releasing and returning to me those parts of me that remain prisoner in my own psychic and emotional jail, I can have access to the now. I allow myself this moment. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote We not only attempt geographical 'cures' while drinking, but often while clean and sober too. When you make a move 'for the better,' unless you can honestly say you are running to something positive, then you are running from something that you haven't faced. No matter how fast or how far I go, I can't outrun myself. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Not drinking is a symptom of your recovery. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am learning to think and act in a positive way that is healthy for my mind, body and spirit. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Laughter is the music of Alcoholics Anonymous. - Angie D. |
December 16
Daily Reflections PARTNERS IN RECOVERY . . . nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics . . . Both you and the new man must walk day by day in the path of spiritual progress. . . . Follow the dictates of a Higher Power and you will presently live in a new and wonderful world, no matter what your present circumstances! ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pp. 89, 100 Doing the right things for the right reasons -- this is my way of controlling my selfishness and self-centeredness. I realize that my dependency on a Higher Power clears the way for peace of mind, happiness and sobriety. I pray each day that I will avoid my previous actions, so that I will be helpful to others. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The way of A.A. is the way of faith. We don't get the full benefit of the program until we surrender our lives to some Power greater than ourselves and trust that Power to give us the strength we need. There is no better way for us. We can get sober without it. We can stay sober for some time without it. But if we are going to truly live, we must take the way of faith in God. That is the path for us. We must follow it. Have I taken the way of faith? Meditation For The Day Life is not a search for happiness. Happiness is a by-product of living the right kind of a life, of doing the right thing. Do not search for happiness, search for right living and happiness will be your reward. Life is sometimes a march of duty during dull, dark days. But happiness will come again, as God's smile of recognition of your faithfulness. True happiness is always the by-product of a life well lived. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not seek happiness but seek to do right. I pray that I may not seek pleasure so much as the things that bring true happiness. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Two Roads for the Oldtimer, p. 138 The founders of many groups ultimately divide into two classes known in A.A. slang as "elder statesmen" and "bleeding deacons." The elder statesman sees the wisdom of the group's decision to run itself and holds no resentment over his reduced status. His judgment, fortified by considerable experience, is sound; he is willing to sit quietly on the side lines patiently awaiting developments. The bleeding deacon is just as surely convinced that the group cannot get along without him. He constantly connives for re-election to office and continues to be consumed with self-pity. Nearly every oldtimer in our Society has gone through this process in some degree. Happily, most of them survive and live to become elder statesmen. They become the real and permanent leadership of A.A. 12 & 12, p. 135 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Others must not define us. Self-image The thoughtless practice of lumping people into categories can be destructive. Some of us still seethe with resentment over the roles we were given in our families while growing up. We realize that this way of being defined was a put-down. As adults living sober, we must now make sure that we define ourselves in ways that contribute to our success and happiness. If others attempt to attach labels to us, we must not accept this... at least not in our own minds. If others are attempting to define us in this way, we must always ask whether we've invited such labeling. Did your behavior somehow give them this impression? Did we mask our true feelings to present an image with which we don't really want to live? Whatever the answer, we must take charge of defining who we are and what we want to be. If I don't like the way people have been viewing me, I'll change the signals I've been sending out. Any signals I send should fit the way I really want to be known. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Charity sees the need, not the cause.--German proverb. Charity is not just giving money to good causes. Charity is having a heart that's ready to give. Charity is helping a friend at two in the morning. Charity is going early to the meeting to put on coffee without being asked. Service is how Twelve Step programs refer to "Charity". Service and charity are a lifestyle. We see a need, so we try to help. Our values and our heart will guide us in how we help. Service is a big part of our program. Service helps us think of others, not just of ourselves. We stop asking, "What's in it for me?" The act of helping others is what's in it for us. Sobriety is what's in it for us. Serenity is what's in it for us. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You have given me many talents. Help me see how my talents can make the world a better place. Giving of myself is believing in You and myself. Action for the Day: Today, I'll list my talents and I'll think of ways I can use them to help others. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning To have someone who brings out the colors of life and whose very presence offers tranquility and contentment enriches my being and makes me grateful for the opportunity to share. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly Loneliness and isolation are familiar states to most of us. We often protected our insecurities by hiding out, believing that we'd survive if others didn't know who we really were. But we discovered that our insecurities multiplied. The remedy is people--talking to people, exposing our insecurities to them, risking, risking, risking. Sharing our mutual vulnerabilities helps us see how fully alike we are. Our most hated shortcoming is not unique, and that brings relief. It's so easy to feel utterly shamed in isolation. Hearing another woman say "I understand. I struggle with jealousy too," lifts the shame, the dread, the burden of silence. The program has taught us that secrets make us sick, and the longer we protect them, the greater are our struggles. The program promises fulfillment, serenity, achievement when we willingly share our lives. Each day we can lighten our burdens and help another lighten hers, too. I will be alert today to the needs of others. I will risk sharing. I will be a purveyor of tranquility. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS When you discover a prospect for Alcoholics Anonymous, find out all you can about him. If he does not want to stop drinking, don’t waste time trying to persuade him. You may spoil a later opportunity. This advice is given for his family also. They should be patient, realizing they are dealing with a sick person. p. 90 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. What I've learned is that it doesn't matter what hardships and losses I've endured in sobriety, I have not had to go back to drinking. As long as I work the program, keep being of service, go to meetings, and keep my spiritual life together, I can live a decent life. p. 485 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." The best intentioned of us can fall for the "two step" illusion. Sooner or later the pink cloud stage wears off and things go disappointingly dull. We begin to think that A.A. doesn't pay off after all. We become puzzled and discouraged. p. 113 ************************************************** ********* The secret of what life's all about, Was answered by the sages: Life's about one day at a time, No matter what your age is. --Robert Half "In discussing an approach to bringing about positive changes within oneself, learning is only the first step. There are other factors as well: conviction, determination, action and effort." --Dalai Lama "If you spend your whole life waiting for the storm, you'll never enjoy the sunshine." --Morris West "It is a defining moment when someone in authority finally reaches the conclusion that leadership is not about using people ~ it's about serving them." --Neil Eskelin "Until you have learned to be tolerant with those who do not always agree with you; until you have cultivated the habit of saying some kind word of those whom you do not admire; until you have formed the habit of looking for the good instead of the bad there is in others, you will be neither successful nor happy." --Napoleon Hill "Everyone Smiles in the same language." --Proverb "Pain comes like the weather, but joy is a choice." --Rodney Crowell, Singer, Songwriter God can bring showers of blessing out of storms of adversity. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation GENEROSITY "Liberty is the one thing you can't have unless you give it to others." -- William Allen White Spirituality is rooted in a respect for self that demands an equal respect for others. I can expect to be treated with dignity if I afford dignity to others. In the one is the key to the many. For years I lived a compulsive life that only made me self-centered and spoiled, and it didn't work! I was unhappy, lonely and resentful. Today I find that the more I give to others the more I receive. Less is more. In this sense it is much easier to be good than bad because "goodness" works! Spirit of generosity, may I always reflect the gratitude that gives. ************************************************** ********* "I trust in the steadfast love of God forever and ever." Psalm 52:8 "The LORD protects the simplehearted; when I was in great need, he saved me." Psalm 116:6 "Now godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content" 1 Timothy 6:6-8 "But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light." 1 Peter 2:9 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Do that which is right and learn to do it for the right reason. Lord, give us strength as we stand up to temptation and spiritual power as we resist the pressures and stresses that bear down on us. You cannot ask too much if you use your blessings ceaselessly. Lord, help me to reflect on and live in Your spirit. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Where There's Smoke... "Complacency is the enemy of members with substantial clean time. If we remain complacent for long, the recovery process ceases." Basic Text pg. 80 Recognizing complacency in our recovery is like seeing smoke in a room. The "smoke" thickens when our meeting attendance drops, contact with newcomers decreases, or relations with our sponsor aren't maintained. With continued complacency; we won't be able to see through the smoke to find our way out. Only our immediate response will prevent an inferno. We must learn to recognize the smoke of complacency. In NA, we have all the help We need to do that. We need to spend time with other recovering addicts because they may detect our complacency before we do. Newcomers will remind us of how painful active addiction can be. Our sponsor will help us remain focused, and recovery literature kept in easy reach can be used to extinguish the small flare-ups that happen from time to time. Regular participation in our recovery will surely enable us to see that wisp of smoke long before it becomes a major inferno. Just for today: I will participate in the full range of my recovery; My commitment to NA is just as strong today as it was in the beginning of my recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Because you're not what I would have you be, I blind myself to who, in truth, you are. --Madeleine L'Engle Sometimes we expect far too much of the people around us, and because no one can ever live up to those expectations, we are almost always disappointed. But wouldn't it be better if we just let go, and let people be who they are? Then we'd be able to see them as they are--with all their beauty and goodness in which we take joy, and with all their faults which we can also see in ourselves. When we have put someone up on a pedestal, sculpturing them to fit our needs and desires by smoothing out the rough edges and creating new curves here and there, we cannot see the real person underneath our work. All we see is the illusion we have created. That is denying the person's real identity and is disrespectful. It's much better for our friends and for ourselves if we drop our expectations and illusions, and accept them all just the way they are. What unfair expectations do I have of others? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart And try to love the questions themselves. --Rainer Maria Rilke Patience with ourselves may be the first step toward patience with others. In getting to know ourselves, we don't find what we have expected. If we did, we would only be proving what we already knew. Sometimes growth comes in surprising ways. It may be in acceptance and learning to love what is unsettled or unclear within. Some of us men want to rush through our learning and push our growth too fast. Others of us want to have a strong sense of confidence in our relationships with others but always feel vulnerable. Some wonder why their fears suddenly rise without warning. Another longs to know why certain things happened to him in his youth. Our growth is not our invention. When answers come, they are gifts, and we do not control them. In part, self-acceptance is to say, "Yes, I am a person with this question, this unsettled feeling. Being alive is to be actively engaged in knowing and loving my questions even when I find no answer." God, grant me the peace that comes with loving the unfinished part of me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. To have someone who brings out the colors of life and whose very presence offers tranquility and contentment enriches my being and makes me grateful for the opportunity to share. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly Loneliness and isolation are familiar states to most of us. We often protected our insecurities by hiding out, believing that we'd survive if others didn't know who we really were. But we discovered that our insecurities multiplied. The remedy is people--talking to people, exposing our insecurities to them, risking, risking, risking. Sharing our mutual vulnerabilities helps us see how fully alike we are. Our most hated shortcoming is not unique, and that brings relief. It's so easy to feel utterly shamed in isolation. Hearing another woman say "I understand. I struggle with jealousy too," lifts the shame, the dread, the burden of silence. The program has taught us that secrets make us sick, and the longer we protect them, the greater are our struggles. The program promises fulfillment, serenity, achievement when we willingly share our lives. Each day we can lighten our burdens and help another lighten hers, too. I will be alert today to the needs of others. I will risk sharing. I will be a purveyor of tranquility. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Taking Care of Ourselves Emotionally What does it mean to take care of myself emotionally? I recognize when I'm feeling angry, and I accept that feeling without shame or blame. I recognize when I'm feeling hurt, and I accept those feelings without attempting to punish the source of my pain. I recognize and feel fear when that emotion presents itself. I allow myself to feel happiness, joy, and love when those emotions are available. Taking care of myself means I've made a decision that it's okay to feel. Taking care of my emotions means I allow myself to stay with the feeling until it's time to release it and go on to the next one. I recognize that sometimes my feelings can help point me toward reality, but sometimes my feelings are deceptive. They are important, but I do not have to let them control me. I can feel, and think too. I talk to people about my feelings when that's appropriate and safe. I reach out for help or guidance if I get stuck in a particular emotion. I'm open to the lessons my emotions may be trying to teach me. After I feel, accept, and release the feeling, I ask myself what it is I want or need to do to take care of myself. Taking care of myself emotionally means I value, treasure, explore, and cherish the emotional part of myself. Today, I will take care of myself emotionally. I will be open to, and accepting of, the emotional part of myself and other people. I will strive for balance by combining emotions with reason, but I will not allow intellect to push the emotional part of myself away. Whatever I am thinking right now is creating how I am feeling. I turn to positive and loving thoughts because I choose to feel good. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Be an Angel I often imagine that we keep the angels very busy. They tell us to turn here or there, warn us of dangers, say Listen! and Look! They tell us things will be okay, and they’re sorry we hurt. Angels in our lives encourage us to hope, dream, dare, and trust. They point out beautiful sights. They shine a light on our path, so we know where to step next. Most of us are not as sure of ourselves as we’d like others to think. We need guidance, faith, and hope. We need to know we’re on track and that someone cares. We need the angels to help us. The angels in our lives give us a kind word, share a kind thought, offer a helping hand and a warm smile. Their words empower and comfort us. Their touch heals, their loving looks warm our hearts. They radiate love and faith. “I’ve learned it’s easy to be loving,” one man said. “What takes work is to be kind.” Make it easier for the angels, and easier for others. Practice being loving and kind. Be an angel,too. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Now is a powerful time “The entire skydive is great,” a friend said to me. “But one of my favorite moments is when we open the door, and I can see the whole sky spread out in front of me.” I remember that feeling the day I was given the choice to recover from chemical dependency or go to jail, the day I got my frist writing job, the day my daughter gave birth to her first child. It’s that split second when now freezes and stretches out into infinity. For just a moment all that has been and all that might be crown into a single arc in time and the power of the universe rushes through us. Get a little of that feeling every day just to remind yourself of the power and potential of now. Sure, we can envision our rosy future after the big project pays off, or when we’ve got fifteen years of sobriety, or after we reach retirement. But what about that moment when the minister pronounces you husband and wife, or the moment after you tell your parents you’re gay, or the day you walk out on someone, or the day someone walks out on you? The power isn’t out there somewhere in the distant horizon. Feel the rush of the moment. It really is your life. You have all the power you need, right now. God, help me tap into the rush of power available to me right here and right now. *************************************** Discovering True Selves Soul Seeing When we want to see deeply into the heart and mind of another person, soul seeing, also called soul gazing, allows us to see their soul. The soul is the purest expression of an individual and is not bound by physical forms or fleeting emotions. Through a simple art that involves looking deeply into a partner’s eyes, soul seeing can show you a person’s inner beauty that you might otherwise miss. It is possible for someone who appears cold to have a warm, giving, nurturing soul or someone of average appearance to have a beautiful soul. Soul seeing is a way of looking past shapes, sizes, attitudes, and behavior to see the real individual that lies beneath the surface. It allows you to see the true essence of another person, the radiance of their being, and their spirit within. Soul seeing is accomplished by sitting face to face with another person. It is helpful to first state your intention before you begin. As you stare softly into each other’s eyes without stopping to look away, each of your souls is revealed to the other. Try not to look for anything in particular or seek traits you’re hoping to find. Simply let the other person’s soul reveal itself to you. After twenty minutes have passed, stay where you are and share a period of silent reflection with your partner for two minutes. You may have suddenly seen your partner’s inner nature as clearly as a bright day, or you may need to meditate on your experience before you feel comfortable with your impressions. Either way, soul seeing can be a wonderfully intimate and shared experience. So little of who each of us is can be captured by our appearance or personality. The thoughts, fears, desires, and longings that are part of what makes us whole are not always written across our faces. Often, the most surprising thing you may learn while soul seeing is that while you and the other person may appear on the surface to be quite different, you actually share many of the same inner qualities. And then there is the unique beauty that resides within that is longing to be revealed to another who is willing to see. Soul seeing can help you experience the people in your life as they truly are, beyond any mental barriers or physical limitations. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Sometimes, on those bad days we all have from time to time, it almost seems that God doesn’t want us to be happy here on earth and, for those of us who believe in an afterlife, that He demands pain and suffering in this life as the price of happiness in the next. The Program teaches me that just the opposite is the case. God wants me to be happy right here on earth — right now. When I allow Him to, He will even point out the way. Do I sometimes stubbornly refuse to look where God is pointing? Today I Pray I pray that I am not playing the perennial sufferer, dragging around in the boots of tragedy and acting as if suffering is the only ticket to heaven. May I look around, at the goodness and greenery of earth, which is testimony enough that our life here is meant to be more than just one pitfall after another. Man no misconception of God as a master trapper, waiting in every thicket to snare us, distort my relationship with a loving, forgiving Higher Power. Today I Will Remember There is more to life than suffering. *************************************** One More Day It is well that there is no one without a fault, for he would not have a friend in the world. – William Hazlitt As youngsters we may have had doubts, just as we do now, about making new friends. We imposed unwritten rules upon ourselves as we sought out new friends. Will they like me? How do I approach them? Will we have enough to talk about? These questions are again in our minds as we approach old and new relationships. We might worry that since we aren’t always feeling happy and well, our friends is not usually true, but it may take us a little while to pull away from fear and self-doubt and to make real efforts at making and maintaining our friendships. Today, I will let my friends know just how important they are to me. ***************************************** One Day At A Time COURAGE "Courage is the power to let go of the familiar." Raymond Linquist (For many years, the pastor at the Hollywood Presbyterian Church in Hollywood, California) A sponsor once asked me what I had against feeling good. I had no answer. I now see that in my sickness and ignorance I hung onto the familiar, what I perceived to be truth. Fear kept me from trying something new until I hurt bad enough to beg God for the courage to try a different way. I am amazed at how long I put up with a miserable existence, not even recognizing my fear of change. I understand now that, although physically full-grown, I am spiritually still growing and becoming. One Day at a Time . . . Do I have the courage to change? To even look at change? Jeremiah ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that is it fatal. For when harboring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die. - Pg. 66 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote To insist stubbornly on holding to old relationships, when they are basically drug oriented relationships is sabotaging our recovery process. Is it not our disease finding a 'good' excuse to keep us close to drugs? May I be able to hear the suggestions of those who work with me. May I listen in this next hour and follow the suggestions. Learning from Life There are no 'buts' today. I am what I am, others are what they are, life is what it is. I will not parenthesize my growth with a 'but' or hold back my forward-moving spirit with second-guesses. For today, I am living with things as they are. I am exactly where I am meant to be, learning what I need to learn. All I need do is move through situations with willingness to learn and openness to feel. When feelings are brought up, I can accept them as what is happening within me - no need to resist and analyze them. Transformation will happen in the moving through and the acceptance of them. I trust that my life is unfolding in such a way that what I need to learn will be before me. I am willing to learn. I see the 'table prepared.' - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote A temper will get us into trouble and pride will keep us there. I can't save my face and my butt at the same time. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book With the first three steps, you get the courage to work the rest. When you work the rest, you get rid of the garbage so you can work the first three. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know that it does not matter if I cannot see the end of the road. I have absolute faith and trust that I am walking in the right direction and that I am being guided along the way. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Success consists of getting up one more time than you fall. - Anon |
December 17
Daily Reflections A PRICELESS REWARD . . . . work with other alcoholics. . . . It works when other activities fail. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 89 "Life will take on a new meaning," as the Big Book says (p. 89) This promise has helped me to avoid self-seeking and self-pity. To watch others grow in this wonderful program, to see them improve the quality of their lives, is a priceless reward for my effort to help others. Self-examination is yet another reward for an ongoing recovery, as are serenity, peace and contentment. The energy derived from seeing others on a successful path, of sharing with them the joys of the journey, gives to my life a new meaning. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The way of faith is of course not confined to A.A. It is the way for everybody who wants to really live. But many people can go through life without much of it. Many are doing so, to their own sorrow. The world is full of lack of faith. Many people have lost confidence in any meaning in the universe. Many are wondering if it has any meaning at all. Many are at loose ends. Life has no goal for many. They are strangers in the land. They are not at home. But for us in A.A. the way of faith is the way of life. We have proved by our past lives that we could not live without it. Do I think I could live happily without faith? Meditation For The Day "He maketh His sun rise on the evil and the good, and sends the rain on the just and the unjust." God does not interfere with the working of natural laws. The laws of nature are unchangeable, otherwise we could not depend on them. As far as natural laws are concerned, God makes no distinction between good and bad people. Sickness or death may strike anywhere. But spiritual laws are also made to be obeyed. On our choice of good or evil depends whether we go upward to true success and victory in life or downward to loss and defeat. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may choose today the way of the spiritual life. I pray that I may live today with faith and hope and love. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It WHEN CONFLICTS MOUNT, p. 289 Sometimes I would be forced to look at situations where I was doing badly. Right away, the search for excuses would become frantic. "These," I would exclaim, "are really a good man's faults." When that pet gadget broke apart, I would think, "Well, if those people would only treat me right, I wouldn't have to behave the way I do." Next was this: "God well knows that I do have awful compulsions. I just can't get over this one. So He will have to release me." At last came the time when I would shout, "This, I positively will not do! I won't even try." Of course, my conflicts went right on mounting, because I was simply loaded with excuses, refusals, and outright rebellion. ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Looking For Protectors Self-Reliance Many of us managed to survive while drinking by finding protectors we could lean on. Sometimes the protector wasn't a very strong person---only someone who was willing to support us in some way. A protector could even be a person who gave us flattery or companionship when we wanted it. Such alliances are usually unhealthy and have no lasting place in society. We cannot depend on protectors who will eventually betray us or fail us through no fault of their own. In sobriety, we must grow into a satisfactory form of self-reliance. This is not reliance on our own resources; rather, it is really a way of relying on our Higher Power, the group, our sponsors, and the higher understanding we've found in the program. If we're still looking for people willing to protect us, we need more growth in sobriety. I've been given tools for understanding myself and my life. I can use those tools effectively as I go through the day. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The rose and the thorn, and sorrow and gladness are linked together. --Saadi. When we were drinking and drugging, we didn't have to deal much with feelings. We turned them off. Then, when we let go of the alcohol and other drugs, we started to come back to life. Now--we have feelings again! But, even now, in recovery, we're scared of too much happiness. It's true--we don't want sadness and pain at all. Yet, feelings--the good and the bad--keep on coming. And we have to handle them. We are learning to handle our feelings. We're getting strong enough to deal with them. With the help of our friends in the program, and our Higher Power, we're ready for life. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I want to be fully alive, but I'm a little scared. Help me know what to do with my feelings today. Action for the Day: Today, I'll be open to feelings. I'll enjoy my good feelings and share them. I'll ask for help with hard feelings by praying, and by calling my sponsor. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Give to the world the best you have, and the best will come back to you. --Madeline Bridge We do reap, in some measure, at some time, what we sow. Our respect for others will result in kind. Our love expressed will return tenfold. The kindness we greet others with will ease their relations with us. We get from others what we give, if not at this time and place, at another. We can be certain that our best efforts toward others do not go unnoticed. And we can measure our due by what we give. A major element of our recovery is the focus we place on our behavior, the seriousness with which we tackle our inventories. We can look at ourselves and how we reach out and act toward others; it is a far cry from where we were before entering this program. Most of us obsessed on "What he did to me," or "What she said." And then returned their actions in kind. How thrilling is the knowledge that we can invite loving behavior by giving it! We have a great deal of control over the ebb and flow of our lives. In every instance we can control, our behavior. Thus never should we be surprised about the conditions of our lives. What goes around comes around. I will look for the opportunities to be kind and feel the results. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS If there is any indication that he wants to stop, have a good talk with the person most interested in him—usually his wife. Get an idea of his behavior, his problems, his background, the seriousness of his condition, and his religious leanings. You need this information to put yourself in his place, to see how you would like him to approach you if the tables were turned. p. 90 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories BUILDING A NEW LIFE - Hallucinating and restrained by sheriff's deputies and hospital staff, this once-happy family man received an unexpected gift from God--a firm foundation in sobriety that would hold up through good times and bad. When I look back now, I think I stopped maturing at fifteen when I started to get drunk with older guys. I wanted to feel at peace with myself and comfortable with other people. I never found it in drinking. The belonging I always wanted I have found in A.A. and in sobriety. I don't think about drinking. God is there. My sponsor is there. All the credit belongs to God. On my own I could not have quit. I know, I tried it. p. 485 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Then perhaps life, as it has a way of doing, suddenly hands us a great big lump that we can't begin to swallow, let alone digest. We fail to get a worked-for promotion. We lose that good job. Maybe there are serious domestic or romantic difficulties, or perhaps that boy we thought God was looking after becomes a military casualty. What then? Have we alcoholics in A.A. got, or can we get, the resources to meet these calamities which come to so many? These were problems of life which we could never face up to. Can we now, with the help of God as we understand Him, handle them as well and as bravely as our nonalcoholic friends often do? Can we transform these calamities into assets, sources of growth and comfort to ourselves and those about us? Well, we surely have a chance if we switch from "two-stepping" to "twelve-stepping," if we are willing to receive that grace of God which can sustain and strengthen us in any catastrophe. p. 113 ************************************************** ********* "Enthusiastic people experience life from the inside out." --Nido Qubein There are two days about which nobody should ever worry, and these are yesterday and tomorrow. --Robert J. Burdette What people really need is a good listening-to. --Mary Lou Casey When I have done all the footwork I know to do and things are still not working out, I know today that it is time to meditate. I have faith that my answer is still to come. --Ruth Fishel No one else's opinion about me can determine my worth. --Mary Manin Morrissey "Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow." --Melody Beattie ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation FEAR "Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood." -- Marie Curie God is on my side. Today I really believe and understand this truth, and it helps me cope with my fears. Now I am beginning to understand that I was the only real enemy in my life. With this new understanding of God I have the power of choice back in my life. I do not have to stay in a sick process. I do not need sick and negative people in my life. I do not have to place myself in destructive relationships or in fearful situations. God is alive in my life and I am discovering the spiritual power of choice. God, give me the courage to confront my fear and be willing to make changes in my life. ************************************************** ********* "Behold now is the accepted time, behold now is the day of salvation." 2 Corinthians 6:2 "Every word of God is flawless; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him. Proverbs 30:5 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Treat your family as you would treat a best friend. Lord, help me to treasure my family with all of their imperfections as well as my own and cherish the time we have together. Let nothing that others do alter how you treat them. Lord, may I treat all with love and consideration. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Service Motives "Everything that occurs in the course of NA service must be motivated by the desire to more successfully carry the message of recovery to the addict who still suffers." Basic Text pg. xvi Our motives are often a surprise to us. In our early days of recovery, they were almost always a surprise! We've learned to check our motives through prayer, meditation, the steps, and talking to our sponsor or other addicts. When we find ourselves with an especially strong urge to do or have something, it's particularly important to check our motives to find out what we really want. In early recovery, many of us throw ourselves into service with great fervor before we have started the regular practice of motive-checking. It takes awhile before we become aware of the real reasons for our zeal. We may want to impress others, show off our talents, or be recognized and important. Now, these desires may not be harmful in another setting, expressed through another outlet. In NA service, however, they can do serious damage. When we decide to serve NA, we make a decision to help addicts find and maintain recovery. We have to carefully check our motives in service, remembering that it's much easier to frighten away using addicts than to convince them to stay. When we show them game-playing, manipulation, or pomposity, we present an unattractive picture of recovery; However, the unselfish desire to serve others creates an atmosphere that is attractive to the addict who still suffers. Just for today: I will check my motives for the true spirit of service. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Volunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation's compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain loving one another. --Erma Bombeck The most precious time we will ever have we give away by doing volunteer chores to help others get more out of life. There is no material wage for this kind of work, but a host of emotional rewards. The height of volunteer giving is doing an act of kindness or love so quietly that none but ourselves will ever know we had a part in it. What great humility this can bring to us, who live in a world where selfish people often insist on credit for all their deeds--often things they had nothing to do with. All we need do is think of all we have received without deserving it or asking for it. By taking part in the giving end of life, we find the true wealth of our own generosity. What secret gift can I give today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The purpose of man's life is not happiness but worthiness. --Felix Adler When we pursue happiness as a goal for its own sake, we usually reach the opposite point of emptiness. Feeling happy is a by-product of other life experiences. Happiness comes and goes. We welcome it but cannot capture and hold it, nor can we create a recipe for achieving happiness. We will lead far more successful lives pursuing other values which we do have control over, such as honesty, respect for others and ourselves, seeking loving relationships, and making a contribution to the well being of others. We can accept unhappiness and difficulties without struggle when we know we are doing something that has greater meaning. Our Eleventh Step tells us we pray only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out. This helps us focus on God's purpose for us. We can have an inner sense of joy knowing we are leading meaningful lives, even when we aren't having a particularly happy day. I will seek the goals that make my life worthwhile and welcome happiness when it comes. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Give to the world the best you have, and the best will come back to you. --Madeline Bridge We do reap, in some measure, at some time, what we sow. Our respect for others will result in kind. Our love expressed will return tenfold. The kindness we greet others with will ease their relations with us. We get from others what we give, if not at this time and place, at another. We can be certain that our best efforts toward others do not go unnoticed. And we can measure our due by what we give. A major element of our recovery is the focus we place on our behavior, the seriousness with which we tackle our inventories. We can look at ourselves and how we reach out and act toward others; it is a far cry from where we were before entering this program. Most of us obsessed on "What he did to me," or "What she said." And then returned their actions in kind. How thrilling is the knowledge that we can invite loving behavior by giving it! We have a great deal of control over the ebb and flow of our lives. In every instance we can control, our behavior. Thus never should we be surprised about the conditions of our lives. What goes around comes around. I will look for the opportunities to be kind and feel the results. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Nurturing Ourselves Many of us have been so deprived of nurturing that we think it's silly or self-indulgent. Nurturing is neither silly nor self-indulgent; it's how we show love for ourselves. That's what we're striving for in recovery - a loving relationship with ourselves that works, so we can have loving relationships with others that work. When we hurt, we ask ourselves what we need to help us feel better. When we feel alone, we reach out to someone safe. Without feeling that we are a burden, we allow that person to be there for us. We rest when we're tired; eat when we're hungry; have fun or relax when our spirits need a lift. Nurturing means giving ourselves gifts - a trip to the beauty salon or barbershop, a massage, a book, a new jacket, or a new suit or dress. It means a long, hot bath to forget about our problems and the world for a few moments when that would feel good. We learn to be gentle with ourselves and to open up to the nurturing that others have to offer us. As part of nurturing ourselves, we allow ourselves to give and receive positive touch - touch that feels appropriate to us, touch that is safe. We reject touch that doesn't feel good or safe and is not positive. We learn to give ourselves what we need in a gentle, loving, compassionate way. We do this with the understanding it will not make us lazy, spoiled, self centered, or narcissistic. Nurtured people are effective in their work and in their relationships. We will learn to feel loved by ourselves so much that we can truly love others and let them love us. Today, I will nurture myself. I will also be open to the nurturing that I can give to others and receive from them. When I have done all the footwork I know to do and things are still not working out, I know today that it is time to meditate. I have faith that my answer is still to come. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Don’t Complicate Things The simple, clear answer to life’s situations can be easily found in the heart. Don’t limit its wisdom to just one or two areas; let it guide you through all of your life. Are you struggling with finances? Feeling overwhelmed by taxes? Not certain what to do to help someone you love? Do you have a problem with a friend? Has a business relationship gotten sticky, maybe hopelessly adversarial? Are you at war with the person you love? Problems with children? Problems with parents? A landlord who just won’t get the job done? All of these areas, and more, can be brought to your heart. Do you need to find a new hobby? Are you stuck on a project? Do you need an idea, some creative inspiration? Do you need a new place to live, or a way to fix your current home? Take it all back to your heart. Calm your mind. Let go. Get quiet. You don’t have to know the plan. Just put out the question, then listen to your inner voice. It will guide you through any maze you’ve been lost in. Don’t complicate things or try to figure it all out. The answer is simple: look in your heart. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Take another look at your world Oh, the glory of the ordinary! I wake up, roll over, and look out the sliding glass door at the sun rising over the distant layers of hills. Today will be a day of errands. We’re out of milk, so we’ll make a run to the grocery store, probably returning home with too much chocolate and no milk. The pictures from the last trip needed to be dropped off. We have a flying lesson at 2:00. Then it will be supper at the Lodge with our friend Andy. It’ll probably be something simple, like burgers on the grill. An ordinary day. I remember a time when the ordinary meant searching for another high, searching for money to get drugs. I’m grateful for the ordinary life that I lead. “When we have a toothache, we know that not having a toothache is happiness. But later, when we don’t have a toothache, we don’t treasure our non-toothache,,” Thich Nhat Hanh gently reminds us in his book The Heart of the Buddha’s Teaching. Take another look at your ordinary world. See how glorious it is. *************************************** Sharing Your Gifts Gift Giveaway by Madisyn Taylor We all know how to give the gift of a present, but it is more important to share your gifts that you were born with. When the holidays come around, most of us join the masses in shopping for gifts, wrapping them, and giving them away. Once we are in the mind-set that this is what we are going to do, we don’t hold back or struggle with the process. We simply give the presents we have acquired, letting them go in the awareness that they were never ours anyway. If we could apply some of this unquestioning generosity with our own inner resources and gifts, we might be able to give of ourselves more freely. In truth, our gifts only make sense when we give them away. Imagine carefully procured and wrapped presents that remain in the house of the giver, never getting to the people who were meant to have them. If we hold back, not knowing quite when to share our gifts, we all lose. Ironically, the more we give of ourselves, the more we have to offer. For example, if we have a talent for singing but we hold it back, we sing less and have less experience. On the other hand, if we offer the gift of our voice to the world at every opportunity, our talent develops and becomes still greater, and we have that much more to give. How we present our gifts can be likened to wrapping paper and ribbons. When we truly value what we have to offer, our presentation honors what lies inside it. We speak well of our talents and introduce them with confidence and panache. Like a performer who chooses carefully what to wear and how to set the stage, we provide an environment that complements and enhances what we have to offer. Far from being superficial, a beautiful presentation is as much a part of the energy of gift giving as the gift itself. All these things together—the gift, the presentation, and the giving away—make up the joyful experience of bestowing our offerings upon the world. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day More and more these days, as I progress in my recovery, I seem to do a lot of listening — quietly waiting to hear God’s unmistakable voice within me. Prayer is becoming a two-way street — of seeking and listening, of searching and finding. A favorite bit of Scripture for me is, “Be still and know that I am God.” Do I pay quiet and loving attention to Him, ever more confident of an enlightened knowledge of His will for me? Today I Pray As I seek to know my Higher Power, may I learn the best ways — for me — to reach and hear Him. May I begin to feel prayer, not just listening to the sound of my own verbalizing. May I feel the sharp outlines of my humanness fading as His Godliness becomes a part of me. May I feel that I am one with Him. Today I will Remember Feel the stillness of God. *************************************** One More Day Sadness flies on the wings of the morning and out of the heart of darkness comes the light. – Jean Giraudoux Many people — not just the chronically ill — experience a sense of sadness or longing at this time of year. Perhaps the season stirs memories of carefree, happier times or, instead, of holidays long ago that were unhappy and without fantasy. Knowing that this sadness is not uncommon can be comforting and so is knowing we can resist sadness. If we’re unhappy with old traditions, we can introduce new ones. If we’ve isolated ourselves, we can join in some group activities. And if we’re tired, we can give ourselves permission to say no and to have time alone. We might also examine our expectations and remember that special days are not copies of earlier ones. Each is new. In the holidays ahead, I will continue to do the things that have been special. I will abandon any pattern that gives me no joy. ***************************************** One Day At A Time PEACE "We cannot find peace if we are afraid of the windstorms of life." Elisabeth Kubler-Ross (Psychiatrist and author of 'On Death and Dying') My life always seemed so filled with difficulty. I seemed to have more than my fair share of traumas and losses. Why was I always being tested like this? It just didn't seem fair. I was so wrapped up in myself and the unfairness of my difficult life that I couldn't see that each of these harsh experiences had been opportunities for growth. Instead of bemoaning my fate and blaming people or situations for what seemed to me to be the cause of the current difficulty, I never looked at what part I had played in the whole situation, or the lessons I could learn from each of these experiences. It has often been said that God doesn't give us more than we can cope with. What I realized later, once I'd come into the program, was that each of these experiences had been a unique learning opportunity for me; they were a chance to grow and mature. I had been too stuck in self-pity and blame that I hadn't seen the wonderful gifts that I was being given with each new life experience. When I was able to open myself up fully to the lessons that I could learn from life, I became a whole person. It was then that the promises of the program begin to be fulfilled in my life, and I began to know serenity and peace. One Day at a Time . . . I will look for what lesson my Higher Power wants me to learn from life. I am then able to grow and change, and by doing so, I will come to know serenity and peace. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The terms 'spiritual experience' and 'spiritual awakening' are used many times in this book which, upon careful reading, shows that the personality change sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism has manifested itself among us in many different forms. - Pg. 567 - 4th. Edition - Appendices II - Spiritual Experience Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Are we remembering the so-called 'good times' right now? How nice a 'high' would be? We use this hour to REALLY think about what got us to this fight for sobriety. It wasn't because we were having a lot of fun! Help me to think a drink and drug all the way through, not just the high but the hell it leads to. A Return to Living Today, I keep my house clean and let go of the rest - some of the ways that I wish to live as a recovered person will not be readily understood by others. I will keep my own scorecard clean and not worry about the results. I will act in a way that makes it easier for me to live with myself - that keeps my own conscience clear. Other people's negative projections of me no longer run me. I am the one who makes the decisions about who I want to be. I need not defend and explain myself again and again. I need not ask permission to be who I am. I allow myself to be happy in my own skin today. I think well of myself, no matter what others think of me. I create my own self. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The people you most need to give love to will seem like the ones who deserve it the least. It begins with me. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Going to any lengths are our strengths. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am doing the best that I can with the guidance that I get. I leave the results to my Higher Power and trust that they are for the greatest good. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote It's not just the 'yets' I worry about if I pick up a drink - it's also the 'agains'. - Anon. |
December 18
Daily Reflections HONESTY WITH NEWCOMERS Tell him exactly what happened to you. Stress the spiritual feature freely. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 93 The marvel of A.A. is that I tell only what happened to me. I don't waste time offering advice to potential newcomers, for if advice worked, nobody would get to A.A. All I have to do is show what has brought me sobriety and what has changed my life. If I fail to stress the spiritual feature of A.A.'s program, I am being dishonest. The newcomer should not be given a false impression of sobriety. I am sober only through the grace of my Higher Power, and that makes it possible for me to share with others. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Unless we have the key of faith to unlock the meaning of life, we are lost. We do not choose faith because it is one way for us, but because it is the only way. Many have failed and will fail. For we cannot live victoriously without faith; we are at sea without a rudder or an anchor, drifting on the sea of life. Wayfarers without a home. Our souls are restless until they find rest in God. Without faith, our lives are a meaningless succession of unrelated happenings, without rhyme or reason. Have I come to rest in faith? Meditation For The Day This vast universe around us, including this wonderful earth on which we live, was once perhaps only a thought in the mind of God. The nearer the astronomers and the physicists get to the ultimate composition of all things, the nearer the universe approaches a mathematical formula, which is thought. The universe may be the thought of the Great Thinker. We must try to think God's thoughts after Him. We must try to get the guidance from the Divine Mind as to what His intention is for the world and what part we can have in carrying out that intention. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not worry over the limitations of the human mind. I pray that I may live as though my mind were a reflection of the Divine Mind. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Those Other People, p.268 "Just like you, I have often thought myself the victim of what other people say and do. Yet every time I confessed the sins of such people, especially those whose sins did not correspond exactly with my own, I found that I only increased the total damage. My own resentment, my self-pity would often render me well-nigh useless to anybody. "So, nowadays, if anyone talks of me so as to hurt, I first ask myself if there is any truth at all in what they say. If there is none, I try to remember that I too have had my periods of speaking bitterly of others; that hurtful gossip is but a symptom of our remaining emotional illness; and consequently that I must never be angry at the unreasonableness of sick people. "Under very trying conditions I have had, again and again, to forgive others--also myself. Have you recently tried this?" Letter, 1946 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The Fear Of Loneliness Raising Self-Esteem The fear of being alone brings strange results. It may cause us to cling to arrangements and relationships that are unsatisfactory or destructive. Some of us become enablers for loved ones who are still drinking; quite often this can involve putting up with abuse we shouldn't have to endure. We endure such relationships because we fear we'll be alone and defenseless without them. We may even put up with friends who are manipulative or treacherous because we can't visualize having happier, healthier friendships. When we recognize that we are holding on to unsatisfactory relationships for such reasons, we need to apply the program more diligently in our own lives. Usually, we need more self-esteem--a belief that we deserve satisfactory relationships. We do not have to be alone, but neither do we have to endure what amounts to abuse and rejection. WhetherI'm with people or alone today, I'll know that all of my relationships should be satisfactory for everybody involved. I'll let my Higher Power guide me to the relationships that are right for me. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."Franklin D. Roosevelt As addicts, we had lots of fear. Some of us were afraid of failure. So we didn't try to do much. Or else we tried too hard all the time. We used alcohol and other drugs to forget our fear, but it didn't go away. It got worse. Now we know we don't have to be afraid. When our lives are in the care of our Higher Power, we're safe. Faith is the cure for out fear. But still, fear keeps creeping back inside us. That's okay. It's normal. There is so much that's new in our sober life! We don't know what will happen next. It's hard to always remember to trust our Higher Power. It's hard to always do what our Higher Power says. It's hard to always have faith. We have to practice turning our fear over to our Higher Power. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, be with me when I'm afraid. Help me remember to have faith to believe in You, even when my fear tells me not to. Action for the Day: Today, I'll notice my fear and pray each time get afraid. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Destruction. Crashing realities exploding in imperfect landings. Ouch. It's my heart that's breaking, for these have been my fantasies and my world. --Mary Casey We frequently aren't given what we want--whether it's a particular job, a certain relationship, a special talent. But we are always given exactly what we need at the moment. None of us can see what tomorrow is designed to bring, and our fantasies are always tied to a future moment. Our fantasies seldom correlate with the real conditions that are necessary to our continued spiritual growth. Fantasies are purposeful. They give us goals to strive for, directions to move in. They are never as far-sighted as the goals our higher power has in store for us, though. We have far greater gifts than we are aware of, and we are being pushed to develop them at the very times when it seems our world is crashing down. We can cherish our fantasies--but let them go. Our real purpose in life far exceeds our fondest dreams. The Steps have given us the tools to make God's plan for us a reality. How limited is my vision, my dreams. If one of mine is dashed today, I will rest assured that an even better one will present itself, if I but let it. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Sometimes it is wise to wait till he goes on a binge. The family may object to this, but unless he is in a dangerous physical condition, it is better to risk it. Don’t deal with him when he is very drunk, unless he is ugly and the family needs your help. Wait for the end of the spree, or at least for a lucid interval. Then let his family or a friend ask him if he wants to quit for good and if he would go to any extreme to do so. If he says yes, then his attention should be drawn to you as a person who has recovered. You should be described to him as one of a fellowship who, as part of their own recovery, try to help others and who will be glad to talk to him if he cares to see you. p. 90 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. I thought my life had come to an end when I arrived at my first meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous at twenty-eight years old. I had been drinking since my early teens, and to my way of thinking, booze had been the answer to my problems, not the problem itself. Even I had to admit, though, that my life had gotten pretty bad and my options were quickly running out. In a moment of desperation, I agreed to go to one A.A. meeting. p. 486 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Our basic troubles are the same as everyone else's, but when an honest effort is made "to practice these principles in all our affairs," well-grounded A.A.'s seem to have the ability, by God's grace, to take these troubles in stride and turn them into demonstrations of faith. We have seen A.A.'s suffer lingering and fatal illness with little complaint, and often in good cheer. We have sometimes seen families broken apart by misunderstanding, tensions, or actual infidelity, who are reunited by the A.A. way of life. p. 114 ************************************************** ********* Thought is the blossom; language the bud; action the fruit behind it. --Ralph Waldo Emerson "Let me tell thee, time is a very precious gift of God; so precious that it is only given to us moment by moment." --Amelia Barr Pain is never permanent. --Saint Theresa of Avila Meetings: A checkup from the neck up. --unknown Don't give up before the miracle happens. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation FREEDOM "You are free and that is why you are lost." -- Franz Kafka Part of my understanding of spirituality is that we have many choices and we live in moments of "not knowing". Part of being human is that we have feelings of being lost. These feelings can lead to fear and loneliness or they can be seen as the essence of man's risk and adventure. With freedom comes daily uncertainties; nothing is predestined or made to happen God is in the choice. Herein lies true greatness. The fact is that we do not have all the answers. We are not sure of the results. The joys are mingled with the pain and sorrows such is the divinity of life. And yet still we choose to live! Sobriety is accepting the reality of this uncertain life. My responsibility is accepting this freedom and making a daily choice not to drink. May I accept my "lostness" until I return home to You. ************************************************** ********* "...behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, 'Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary your wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit; she will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins." Luke 1:20-21 Let them give thanks to the Lord for His unfailing love, and His wonderful deeds for men. Psalm 107:15 Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and He saved them from their distress. Psalm 107:19 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you are not happy with what you have, how will you be happy with what you want to have? Lord, may I appreciate the good things in my life and refuse to feel sorry for myself or compare myself to others. Many joys come from the simple things. Lord, open my eyes that I may see the wonders in my life and take the time to enjoy them. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Message Of Our Meetings "The fact that we, each and every group, focus on carrying the message provides consistency; addicts can count on us." Basic Text pg. 64-65 Tales of our antics in active addiction may be funny. Stories of our old bizarre reactions to life when using may be interesting. But they tend to carry the mess more than the message. Philosophical arguments on the nature of God are fascinating. Discussions of current controversies have their place - however, it's not at an NA meeting. Those times when we grow disgusted with meetings and find ourselves complaining that "they don't know how to share" or "it was another whining session" are probably indications that we need to take a good, hard look at how we share. What we share about how we got into recovery and how we stayed here through practicing the Twelve Steps is the real message of recovery. That's what we are all looking for when we go to a meeting. Our primary purpose is to carry the message to the still-suffering addict, and what we share at meetings can either contribute significantly to this effort or detract greatly. The choice, and the responsibility, is ours. Just for today: I will share my recovery at an NA meeting. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Endurance is nobler than strength, and patience than beauty. --John Ruskin It's hard to keep from trying to control the lives of others, especially in a family. We can learn from the man whose friend drove twenty miles to and from work on the freeway every day. "How can you do it?" he asked. "I've tried, and I can't go a mile in such traffic without screaming at the crazy drivers who cut in, go too slow, change lanes. Nobody listens. I'd lose my mind if I had to do it your way." His friend replied, "Your trouble is trying to drive every car around you. I relax and drive only one car--my own." We have only our own lives to live, and this is usually enough to keep us busy. If we pay too much attention to how others live, we will neglect ourselves. What acts of others can I ignore today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Ultimately, both parents and children are seen as individuals. For all their claims on one another, each is entitled to a life separate and distinct from the other. --Francine Klagsbrun The process of untangling the relationships between ourselves and our parents - as well as with our children - is a long term process. Each of us came into the world helpless. As sons, we had no choice about relying on our parents. We reached manhood with a mixture of gratitude, guilt, and resentment. The same is true of our children. Those of us who are fathers began with an obligation to our children. We may now feel a mixture of commitment, fulfillment, and guilt. No parent can teach a child everything he or she will need. We all do what we can to continue to learn and grow. We have lifelong commitments to each other--within reason. We are all trying to make our way as best we can. We each need to advance our own well-being and not destroy our lives for the sake of a parent or a child. Today, I will be responsible for myself. Then I can be more responsible to others. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Destruction. Crashing realities exploding in imperfect landings. Ouch. It's my heart that's breaking, for these have been my fantasies and my world. --Mary Casey We frequently aren't given what we want--whether it's a particular job, a certain relationship, a special talent. But we are always given exactly what we need at the moment. None of us can see what tomorrow is designed to bring, and our fantasies are always tied to a future moment. Our fantasies seldom correlate with the real conditions that are necessary to our continued spiritual growth. Fantasies are purposeful. They give us goals to strive for, directions to move in. They are never as far-sighted as the goals our higher power has in store for us, though. We have far greater gifts than we are aware of, and we are being pushed to develop them at the very times when it seems our world is crashing down. We can cherish our fantasies--but let them go. Our real purpose in life far exceeds our fondest dreams. The Steps have given us the tools to make God's plan for us a reality. How limited is my vision, my dreams. If one of mine is dashed today, I will rest assured that an even better one will present itself, if I but let it. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Staying Open to Our Feelings Many of us have gotten so good at following the "don't feel" rule that we can try to talk ourselves out of having feelings, even in recovery. "If I was really working a good program, I wouldn't feel angry." "I don't get angry. I'm a Christian. I forgive and forget." "I'm not angry. I'm affirming that I'm happy." These are all statements, some of them quite clever, that indicate we're operating under the "don't feel" rule again. Part of working a good program means acknowledging and dealing with our feelings. We strive to accept and deal with our anger so it doesn't harden into resentments. We don't use recovery as an excuse to shut down our emotions. Yes, we are striving for forgiveness, but we still want to feel, listen to, and stay with our feelings until it is time to release them appropriately. Our Higher Power created the emotional part of ourselves. God is not telling us to not feel; it's our dysfunctional systems. We also need to be careful how we use affirmations; discounting our emotions won't make feelings go away. If we're angry, it's okay to have that feeling. That's part of how we get and stay healthy. Today, I will refuse to accept shame from others or myself for feeling my feelings. Today I welcome all my feelings. Today I deserve to feel joy and love and gratitude and warmth and affection, just to name a few. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Celebrate Holidays but Honor Your Holy Days Holidays help us remember important national and religious events. Holidays are marked by the calendar. Holy days are something else. Holy days are the days we remember not because they are marked on any calendar, but because they are important spiritual events to us. These are the days our souls remember. A birthday. The day a loved one left this earth. The anniversary of a significant change in our lives– the day we started something, the day we stopped doing something, the day we accomplished something important to us, a new beginning. Celebrate the holidays marked by the calendar in whatever way you choose. Some of these may be holy days for you as well. But remember to honor your own holy days, the ones that are special to you. Celebrate holidays, but honor your holy days,too. Choose your own rituals. Honor what is sacred to you. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Savor each moment Enjoy each moment as it comes. It’s so easy to relish that final moment, when the project is finished and the work is turned in. It’s easy to trick ourselves into thinking that peak moments in life are the only ones that count. In Benjamin Hoff’s The Tao of Pooh, Pooh talks about the anticipation of eating his honey. The moment when the honey touches your lips is good, Pooh says. But there’s the moment right before, that moment of anticipation, that might be just as good if not better. Go for your dreams. Go for those peak moments of performance and pleasure,too. The day you get your ten-year medallion for sobriety is a good day. Achieving that success in your career– that special award– is a wonderful moment, indeed. And those peak moments in love are indescribably delicious to experience and reminisce about. While many people talk about being in that peak zone of pleasure all the time, most of us know that peak moments are only a very small fraction of our lives. If we only enjoy those peak moments, or those moments just before, we’ll forget to notice the importance of a lot of our lives. Go for peak moments. But open up your heart and let the sheer raw beauty of all the moments in. When you stop looking and waiting for those peak experiences, you might find out how sweet and delicious each single moment really is. Savor each moment of your life. God, help me let go of anything that’s sabotaging my joy. Help me release the belief that I can only find happiness, pleasure, and joy when I’m on top of a peak. *************************************** Stronger for It Mending a Broken Heart by Madisyn Taylor A heart that has been broken and seen pain, reveals within it, a crack that allows more light in. Heartbreak happens to all of us and can wash over us like a heavy rain. When experiencing a broken heart, our ethereal selves are saturated with grief, and the overflow is channeled into the physical body. Loss becomes a physical emptiness, and longing is transmuted into a feeling that often cannot be put into words. Mending a broken heart can seem a task so monumental that we dare not attempt it for fear of damaging ourselves further. But heartbreak, like all emotions, falls under the spell of our conscious influence. Often the pain that wounds us most deeply also leaves the most enduring mark upon us. The shock that becomes the tender, throbbing ache of the heart eventually leads us down the path of enlightenment, blessing our lives with a new depth and richness. Acknowledging heartbreak's impermanence by no means dulls its sting for it is the sting itself that stimulates healing. The pain is letting us know that we need to pay attention to our emotional selves, to sit with our feelings and be in them fully before we can begin to heal. It is said that time heals all wounds. Time may dull the pain of a broken heart, but it is fully feeling your pain and acknowledging it that will truly help you heal. Dealing with your heartache in a healthy way rather than putting it off for tomorrow is the key to repair. Gentleness more than anything else is called for. Most important, open yourself to the possibility of loving, trusting, and believing again. When, someday soon, you emerge from the cushion of your grief, you will see that the universe did not cease to be as you nursed your broken heart. You emerge on the other side of the mending, stronger for all you have experienced. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day I’m learning — all too slowly, at times — that when I give up the losing battle of trying to run my life in my own way, I gain abiding peace and deep serenity. For many of us, that learning process is a painfully slow one. Eventually, however, we understand that there are only two wills in the world, my will and God’s. Whatever is within my direct control is my will; whatever is beyond my direct control is His Will. So I try to accept that which is beyond my control as God’s will for me. Am I beginning to realize that by surrendering my will to the Divine Will, I am for the first time living without turmoil and without anxiety? Today I Pray May I hope that my will can be congruent with the all-encompassing will of God. I pray that I will know immediately if my will is in a useless tug-of-war with His Divine Will. May I trust God now to guide my will according to his Master Plan — and to make His purpose mine. Today I Will Remember Achievement comes when my will is in harmony with God’s. *************************************** One More Day The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today. Let us move forward with strong and active faith. – Franklin Delano Roosevelt Major changes in our lives may stun us — with delight or perhaps disbelief. After all, not all changes are negative. But when the change is negative, when illness is diagnosed or when pain pervades each day, we may begin to doubt our own inner resources. Once physically strong, we will have to dig deeper than ever to tap into our spiritual resources as well. If we have doubts today, it may be because we are still locked into our physical selves. We are more than body, and it is our spirits that can be nourished by our caring Higher Power, Our value and importance are revealed by that care. knowing this, we can move forward with our lives. I will look beyond my physical body for a source of strength and care. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ACTION "You learn to speak by speaking, to study by studying, to run by running, to work by working; in just the same way, you learn to love by loving." St. Francis De Sales (1567 - 1622) (in French, St François de Sales) Bishop of Geneva, Switzerland and a Roman Catholic saint. St. Francis de Sales lived from 1567 to 1622. Isn't it amazing that a man who lived over 300 years before the birth of our recovery program could encapsulate its meaning in the above quote? Put another way, what St. Francis was saying was, "You work the program by working the program." I've met so many people who had theoretical knowledge of recovery, but no practical experience. They don't work the program; they just talk the talk without walking the walk. I'm not proud to admit that I've been one of those people myself. It's a wonderful feeling to actually work the program, to take the Steps, and to trust in the God of my understanding to keep me working it. Paying lip service to the program doesn't bring recovery; only working it does. Anything else is a waste of time and energy. One Day at a Time . . . I will work the program by working the program; today, I'll take action to bring about my recovery. Jeff ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote As we discovered the principles by which the individual alcoholic could live, so we had to evolve principles by which A.A. groups and A.A. as a whole could survive and function effectively. It was thought that no alcoholic man or woman could be excluded from our Society; that our leaders might serve but never govern; that each group was to be autonomous and there was to be no professional class of therapy. - Pg. xix - 4th Edition - Forward To The Second Edition Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Addiction is the great solvent that equalizes all people. We are equal in our addiction and equal in our program of recovery. Although with each passing day of sobriety we get clearer, we are only one fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort away from a binge--at 18 days or 18 years! May I realize I am no better or worse than another, or them from me. We are equal in our recovery. Letting Go Letting go of the past and moving on is a tall order; it requires a kind of releasing that I still find difficult to do. My past will always be in the shadows of my memory to haunt me if I do not recognize it as a part of me. If I pretend it's not important, grit my teeth and force myself to numb myself, I have missed the point of this process. On the other had, if I am unwilling to let go no matter how many times I have worked through certain issues, I am also not allowing myself to be fully healthy and return to life. The part of my healing that is a flowing through the stored pain from the past is a decisive, forward-moving action. I understand that, as part of my process of healing, my responsibility to let go and move on. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Honesty without kindness is cruel and kindness without honesty is co-dependence. If I can't say it kindly, I needn't say it at all. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book It came to pass; it didn't come to stay. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I can handle whatever comes up, knowing that I am surrounded by all the positive energies of the universe. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote People think that they're going to get sober by osmosis and going to 90 meetings in 90 days. But there's only one way to obtain and maintain sobriety and that's through the program folded within these 164 pages. - Ted H. |
December 19
Daily Reflections UNDERSTANDING THE MALADY When dealing with an alcoholic, there may be a natural annoyance that a man could be so weak, stupid and irresponsible. Even when you understand the malady better, you may feel this feeling rising. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 139 Having suffered from alcoholism, I should understand the illness, but sometimes I feel annoyance, even contempt, toward a person who cannot make it in A.A. When I feel that way, I am satisfying my false sense of superiority and I must remember, but for the grace of God, there go I. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The skeptic and the agnostic say it is impossible for us to find the answer to life. Many have tried and failed. But many have put aside intellectual pride and have said to themselves: Who am I to say there is no God? Who am I to say there is no purpose in life? The atheist makes a declaration: "The world originated in a cipher and aimlessly rushes nowhere." Others live for the moment and do not even think about why they are here or where they are going. They might as well be clams on the bottom of the ocean, protected by their hard shells of indifference. They do not care. Do I care where I am going? Meditation For The Day We may consider the material world as the clay which the artist works with, to make of it something beautiful or ugly. We need not fear material things, which are neither good nor bad in the moral sense. There seems to be no active force for evil--outside of human beings themselves. Humans alone can have either evil intentions--resentments, malevolence, hate and revenge--or good intentions--love and good will. They can make something ugly or something beautiful out of the clay of their lives. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may make something beautiful out of my life. I pray that I may be a good artisan of the materials which I have been given to use. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Behind Our Excuses, p.267 As excuse-makers and rationalizers, we drunks are champions. It is the business of the psychiatrist to find the deeper causes for our conduct. Though uninstructed in psychiatry, we can, after a little time in A.A., see that our motives have not been what we thought they were, and that we have been motivated by forces previously unknown to us. Therefore we ought to look, with the deepest respect, interest, and profit, upon the example set us by psychiatry. ******************************** "Spiritual growth through the practice of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, plus the aid of a good sponsor, can usually reveal most of the deeper reasons for our character defects, at least to a degree that meets our practical needs. Nevertheless, we should be grateful that our friends in psychiatry have so strongly emphasized the necessity to search for false and often unconscious motivations." 1. A.A. Comes Of Age, p.236 2. Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Deadlines Facing delays The procrastination of our drinking years caused some of us to become compulsive and fearful about meeting deadlines. We fret and stew if we're unable to get things done when we think they should be completed. Without being careless or irresponsible, we should remember that we're really living in a spiritual world on a spiritual basis. There are times when a delay even turns out to be beneficial because additional information or assistance turns up later on to ensure the success of a project. It is part of mature living to keep promises and to meet the proper deadlines. Let's be sure, however, that we're not simply meeting unrealistic deadlines of our own making. We don't have to do this to atone for any failures of the past. I'll look over my plans today to make sure that I haven't set any unrealistic deadlines for myself. I may be trying too much, too soon. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The truth is more important than the facts. --Frank Lloyd Wright. Before recovery, we relied on false facts about addiction. We said things like, "I can quit anytime I want." "If you had my family, you'd drink too." The truth is, we were out of control. We couldn't manage our lives. We were sick. We were scared. When others pointed out this truth to us, we denied it. Honesty, the backbone of our program, is about truth. We even start our meetings with the truth about who we are. "Hi, my name is ___________, and I'm an alcoholic," or "Hi, my name is _______________, and I'm a drug addict." The truth frees us from our addiction. The truth heals us and gives us comfort. It's like a blanket on a cold winter night. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be an honest person. I pray for the strength to face the truth and speak it. Action for the Day: Today, I'll list 3 ways I have used facts in a dishonest way. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning My singing is very therapeutic. For three hours I have no troubles--I know how it's all going to come out. --Beverly Sills Have we each found an activity that takes us outside of ourselves? An activity that gives us a place to focus our attention? Being self-centered and focused on ourselves accompanies the illness we're struggling to recover from. The decision to quit preoccupying on ourselves, our own struggles with life, is not easy to maintain. But when we have an activity that excites us, on which we periodically concentrate our attention, we are strengthened. And the more we get outside of ourselves, the more aware we become that "all is well." It seems our struggles are intensified as women. So often we face difficult situations at work and with children, alone. The preoccupation with our problems exaggerates them. And the vicious cycle entraps us. However, we don't have to stay trapped. We can pursue a hobby. We can take a class, join a health club. We can dare to follow whatever our desire--to try something new. We need to experience freedom from the inner turmoil in order to know that we deserve even more freedom. Emotional health is just around the corner. I will turn my attention to the world outside myself. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS If he does not want to see you, never force yourself upon him. Neither should the family hysterically plead with him to do anything, nor should they tell him much about you. They should wait for the end of his next drinking bout. You might place this book where he can see it in the interval. Here no specific rule can be given. The family must decide these things. But urge them not to be over-anxious, for that might spoil matters. pp. 90-91 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. It is easier to see now, as I look back on my drinking days, that from the beginning alcohol had been a part of nearly every disaster in my life. As a very young boy, perhaps ten or eleven years old, I had begun to steal drinks when my parents were not looking, or my friends and I would convince someone from the local high school to buy us some beer. Slowly, but very steadily, my problems began to grow from there. p. 486 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Though the earning power of most A.A.'s is relatively high, we have some members who never seem to get on their feet moneywise, and still others who encounter heavy financial reverses. Ordinarily we see these situations met with fortitude and faith. p. 114 ************************************************** ********* "Keep your head and your heart going in the right direction and you will not have to worry about your feet." --Unknown Reputation is what you are in the light; character is what you are in the dark. --American Proverb Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes of which all men have some. --Charles Dickens The mere sense of living is joy enough. --Emily Dickinson Learn to get in touch with silence within yourself, And know that everything in this life has purpose. There are no mistakes, No coincidences, All events are blessings given to us to learn from. --Elizabeth Kubler-Ross ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation INDIVIDUALITY "The People, though we think a great entity when we use the word, means nothing more than so many --- millions of individual men (and women)." James Bryce I am an individual. I am unique. I am special. Today I am able to enjoy my difference. I do not need to hide in alcohol, food or drugs. I do not have to put energy into being the same as friends or neighbors. I do not need to please people in order to feel good about myself. Today I am my own person. God made us varied and different in so many ways, and yet so many of us spend our time trying to be the same. The effort exerted to achieve the lowest common denominator is exactly that: the lowest. My spiritual program demands that I be honest with who I am and what I feel. My self-worth is rooted in my individuality. In my difference is my soul. May I always remain true to my individuality. ************************************************** ********* "This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30 For anyone who enters God's rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from his. Hebrews 4:10 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Through the power of God within me, I am stronger than any of my circumstances. Lord, I seek, I knock and I ask and You are always there and ready to give me the miracles that I need. The first and most powerful commandment is love. Through love we unite ourselves together with God and with each other and bring ourselves closer to our desired goal. Lord, I love You with all my heart and soul and mind. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Walking The Way We Talk "Words mean nothing until we put them into action." Basic Text pg. 56 The Twelfth Step reminds us "to practice these principles in all our affairs." In NA, we see living examples of this suggestion all around us. The more experienced members, who seem to have an aura of peace surrounding them, demonstrate the rewards of applying this bit of wisdom in their lives. To receive the rewards of the Twelfth Step, it is vital that we practice the spiritual principles of recovery even when no one is looking. If we talk about recovery at meetings but continue to live as we did in active addiction, our fellow members may suspect that we are doing nothing more than quoting bumper stickers. What we pass on to newer members comes more from how we live than what we say. If we advise someone to "turn it over" without having experienced the miracle of the Third Step, chances are the message will fail to reach the ears of the newcomer for whom it's intended. On the other hand, if we "walk what we talk" and share our genuine experience in recovery, the message will surely be evident to all. Just for today: I will practice the principles of recovery, even when I'm the only one who knows. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Open your mind and your heart to be still. --Shawn Phillips In this time of international conflict and mistrust it is easy to despair. At times we may even feel hopeless as we hear about wars and weapons. But there is hope! Change can grow from within each of us. The world is like a tree--if the tree is diseased and the leaves brown and brittle, the gardener does not treat the branches, but tends to the roots. Our world is made up of nations, in which there are states containing communities of neighborhoods where individual people live. We are the roots of our world tree. As attitudes change; as we accept and love ourselves honestly and learn, in turn, to accept and love others regardless of our differences, slowly, the branches that extend from us and cover the world will grow strong. The peace we can make within ourselves can be reflected everywhere. Will I find the peace within myself today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. If I were given a change of life, I'd like to see how it would be to live as a mere six-footer. --Wilt Chamberlain It's human nature for us to wonder what life would be like in another man's shoes. No matter how good or bad we've had it, we like to consider those possibilities sometimes. While we were still in the trap of living with an addict or being one, some of us used a fantasy world as an escape from our circumstances. Perhaps it was the only option we knew. Now we are in a program, which liberates us and gives us hope. It's not an easy program, but it is simple. We're learning that when we have a relationship with our Higher Power and become accountable, we gain more options and can have hope. We can do interesting and rewarding things in our lives now that were closed to us before. Sobriety makes it possible for us to go forward into reality and leave fantasy for play. Today, I am grateful for life in the real world that recovery has given me You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. My singing is very therapeutic. For three hours I have no troubles--I know how it's all going to come out. --Beverly Sills Have we each found an activity that takes us outside of ourselves? An activity that gives us a place to focus our attention? Being self-centered and focused on ourselves accompanies the illness we're struggling to recover from. The decision to quit preoccupying on ourselves, our own struggles with life, is not easy to maintain. But when we have an activity that excites us, on which we periodically concentrate our attention, we are strengthened. And the more we get outside of ourselves, the more aware we become that "all is well." It seems our struggles are intensified as women. So often we face difficult situations at work and with children, alone. The preoccupation with our problems exaggerates them. And the vicious cycle entraps us. However, we don't have to stay trapped. We can pursue a hobby. We can take a class, join a health club. We can dare to follow whatever our desire--to try something new. We need to experience freedom from the inner turmoil in order to know that we deserve even more freedom. Emotional health is just around the corner. I will turn my attention to the world outside myself. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Work Roles How easy it is to dive into roles at work. How easy it is to place other people in roles. Sometimes, this is necessary, appropriate, and expedient. But we can also let our self-shine through our role. There is joy in giving our gift of skill at work, at giving ourselves to the task at hand so thoroughly that we experience an intimate relationship with our work. There is joy when we create or accomplish a task and can say, "Well done!" There is also joy when we are our self at work, and when we discover and appreciate those around us. The most unpleasant, mundane task can be breezed through when we stop thinking of ourselves as a robot and allow ourselves to be a person. Those around us will respond warmly when we treat them as individuals and not job defined roles. This does not mean we need to become inappropriately entangled with others. It means that, whether we are an employer or an employee, when people are allowed to be people who perform tasks instead of task performers, we are happier and more content people. Today, I will let myself shine through my task at work. I will try to see others and let them shine through too - instead of looking only at their tasks. God, help me be open to the beauty of others and myself at work. Help me maintain healthy relationships with people at work. In quiet meditation I find emotional balance. I feel myself growing closer and closer to my Higher Power and I find love. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Look for the Deeper Picture The two men were sitting in a restaurant booth, staring intently at the Magic Eye pictures on the wall. “I’ve tried for years to see the picture hidden inside, but I can’t,” said one. “Everyone says it’s there though, so I’ll just have to trust that it is.” Magic Eye pictures have been popular for some time. At first, the picture looks like a print; it’s often a repetitive pattern of the sort you see on wallpaper or a tablecloth. It’s pretty to look at, but it’s not really a picture. But another picture, a 3-D picture is hidden within the print or pattern– one you can see only if you relax your vision and look in a special way. Then the real picture, the deeper picture, appears. I have always thought these pictures contain a lesson. They remind us to look past the daily superficial events of our lives and trust that there is meaning, that there is a deeper picture, one that can be seen only with the eyes of your soul. As we go through our days, weeks, and months, what we’re experiencing doesn’t always make a lot of sense. Sometimes it causes downright distress. We’re uncomfortable. We feel out of place. We wonder if what we see is all there. Those are the times to stop staring so hard, relax our vision, and let the deeper picture, the real picture, come to us. Life goes on, with all its troubles, stresses, changes, and disappointments. But it isn’t a disconnected series of random events. It’s our punishment. And it’s not without meaning. Something important is being worked out in your life and in your soul. Learn to relax. Look for the reflection of something else in the picture of your life. Learn to look more deeply. Learn to look and see with the eyes of the soul. And sometimes, like the man in the restaurant, if we can’t see the picture or the real meaning, we just have to relax and trust that it’s here. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Have the time of your life Make every moment count. The first time I heard the words, I was sitting in the movie theater with Shane. He was eleven at the time. There were only a few other people in the theater, we had snuck out to see a show together. It was one of our favorite mother-son things to do, especially on Sunday nights. Until about a year before, I had been very goal oriented. I was always looking toward the future, moving toward the next level in my life. First there was getting through the poverty, then struggling to get beyond being an impoverished single parent. Then I began working toward the next level of success in my career. I was always trying to make my world and my children’s lives better. As I sat in the theater staring at the screen, I had a flash of my own mortality– at least I thought it was mine. I won’t be here forever, I thought. Someday, this time in my life will have passed. It’ll just be a memory. Shane put his feet up on the back of the seat in front of us. I started to nag him him about this, then I changed my mind. There was nobody sitting there. It wasn’t that big of a deal. I didn’t need to fuss about something that unimportant. Make every moment count, were the words I heard in my heart. It’s so easy to get hooked into the busyness of life. It’s easy to focus on the destination and tell ourselves we’ll be happy when we get there and forget to be happy and cherish the beauty of each moment of the trip. So often, we don’t even know that we’re living the best, most beautiful part of our lives right now. I worried a lot as a struggling single parent, trying to write articles for the Gazette for $25 an article. How will I make ends meet? Am I writing well enough? Geez, I don’t have time to date. Am I being a good enough mother? God, there’s a lot to do raising these kids. In retrospect, it was one of the best times in my life. No matter what emotions you’re feeling, no matter the nature of your problems, this moment is the best time in your life. Stop waiting to win the lottery. Or maybe, don’t stop waiting. Buy your ticket. Then put it away and forget about it. Be happy now. Don’t wait until later when you look back at this time in your life. Say how sweet it is right now. Make every moment count. God, teach me to be happy now. *************************************** Empathy in Action An Experiment in Gratitude by Madisyn Taylor If you find it hard to be grateful for what you have, it is time to dig deeper and be brave when looking for the gratitude. Sometimes we forget to take the time to recognize the richness that defines our lives. This may be because many of the messages we encounter as we go about our affairs prompt us to think about what we don’t have rather than all the abundance we do enjoy. Consequently, our gratitude exists in perpetual conflict with our desire for more, whether we crave time, convenience, wealth, or enlightenment. Yet understanding and truly appreciating our blessings can be as simple as walking a mile in another’s shoes for a short period of time. Because many of us lead comparatively insular lives, we may not comprehend the full scope of our prosperity that is relative to our sisters and brothers in humanity. If you find taking an inventory of your life’s blessings difficult, consider the ease with which you nourish your body and mind, feed your family, move from place to place, and attend to tasks at hand. For a great number of people, activities you may take for granted, such as attaining an education, buying healthy food, commuting to work, or keeping a clean house, represent great challenges. To experience firsthand the complex tests others face as a matter of course in their daily lives, try living without the amenities you most often take for granted. This can be a great experiment to undertake with your entire family or a classroom. Understanding working poverty can be as easy as endeavoring to buy nutritious foods with a budget of $100 for the week. If you own a car, relying on public transportation for even just a day can help you see the true value of the comfort and conveniences others do without. As you explore a life without things you may normally take for granted,! ask yourself for how long you could endure. The compassionate gratitude that floods your heart when you come to fully realize your abundance may awaken pangs of guilt in your heart. Be aware, however, that the purpose of such an experiment is to open your heart further in gratitude and compassion. This awareness can help you attain a deeper level of gratitude that will allow you to savor and, above all, appreciate your life with renewed grace. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Program teaches me to work for progress, not perfection. That simple admonition gives me great comfort, for it represents a primary way in which my life today is so different than it used to be. In my former life, perfection — for all its impossibility — was so often my number one goal. Today I can believe that if I sometimes fail, I’m not a failure — and if I sometimes make a mistake, I’m not a mistake. And I can apply those same beliefs to The Program’s Twelve Steps as well as to my entire life. Do I believe that only Step One can be practiced with perfection, and that the remaining Steps represent perfect ideals? Today I Pray God, teach me to abandon my erstwhile goal of superhuman perfection in everything I did or said. I know that I was actually bent on failure, because I could never attain those impossible heights I had established for myself. Now that I understand this pattern, may I no longer program my own failures. Today I Will Remember I may strive to be a super person, but not a super person. *************************************** One More Day Life is not merely living but living in health. – Martial Living in health may seem impossible for the chronically ill. After all, we reason, it’s difficult to live in health if we are sick. In fact, living in health is an old fashioned tier, almost like a benediction. These days we want to experience the wellness that goes beyond physical health by emphasizing emotional and spiritual health. For the first time we can allow ourselves the right to wellness despite physical illness. Even with an on-going illness, most of us don’t have constant pain or discomfort. there are many times we enjoy ourselves. Playing cards, gardening, going for a walk, praying, meditation — these activities exercise all of our being — physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I will consider my wellness, not illness, my life goal. ***************************************** One Day At A Time JOY "The way to do is to be." Lao Tzu (or 'Old Sage' -- born Li Erh) Sixth century B.C. philosopher who began the philosophy of Taoism It is not until we can let ourselves be who we really are that we can recognize who we REALLY are! In recovery I have learned it is by embracing myself as I am today that I will become increasingly aware of my true identity. It is not by denial or pretended "goodness" that the Truth is revealed, but by acceptance and humility. This is one of the many gifts of recovery ... we no longer have to "wait until." This program tells us we can be happy and free now. HERE AND NOW! But, my ego-mind gives me a different message. It says, "You can be happy, joyous and free when you lose the weight, get your health back, get that job, marry that prince, receive the next degree, and on and on. In other words, "You must wait and wait and wait, and maybe someday you'll be good enough. Then you can be happy." Our ego keeps us in pursuit of the elusive happiness it promises. One Day at a Time . . . I choose to be happy; I choose joy. Patt ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The almost certain consequences that follow taking even a glass of beer do not crowd into the mind to deter us. If these thoughts occur, they are hazy and readily supplanted with the old threadbare idea that this time we shall handle ourselves like other people. There is a complete failure of the kind of defense that keeps one from putting his hand on a hot stove. - Pg. 24 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The most important thing to know about Step Three, turning our will over to a Higher Power, is that all we can do is DECIDE to do it. There is no 'will' we can wrap and send. Once we make the decision to do this, our Higher Power will work for us through the rest of the Steps. I decide to align my will with that of the Source of my Spirit. Reinvestment I have been through a journey of forgiveness. I've faced my anger and hurt and brought order and clarity to my inner world. I've accepted the things I cannot change and changed the things that I could. Because I've shown the courage to face my inner demons and look them in the eye, I feel stronger and more competent. Forgiveness of my self and others has offered me a way out of pain and confusion, and now I find I have a renewed interest in life. I see things differently. I feel liberated from something that was tying up me energy. And I recognize and accept my own humanity, and the humanity of others. I am ready and willing to reinvest in the ideal of love. I want to find worthy projects and passions, and put my energy toward them. I have something to give to the world and the world has something to give to me. I am right where I am supposed to be and I've met the challenges of my life. I am ready to live. I invest my energy with care and gusto - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote It is better to have some-one sober and hating you because you told them the truth, rather than have someone drunk and liking you because you told them a lie. I don't heap on the bull**** when the truth is like Miracle Grow "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Along the road well traveled, there are many pity potholes. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am so full of love and joy today. I see it everywhere I look, and feel it with every breath that I take. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote If you went to a critical AIDS ward and said 'I've got a deal for you; would you come with me to some meetings, meet and chat with some people, take some actions that seem strange to you - would you do that if I could arrest your AIDS? They'd sign over their homes to you. But, go to the alcoholism ward where they're dying from this disease, and they won't go to an AA meeting two doors down the hall. - Clancy I. |
December 20
Daily Reflections THE REWARDS OF GIVING This is indeed the kind of giving that actually demands nothing. He does not expect his brother sufferer to pay him, or even to love him. And then he discovers that by the divine paradox of this kind of giving he has found his own reward, whether his brother has yet received anything or not. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 109 Through experience with Twelfth Step work, I came to understand the rewards of giving that demands nothing in return. At first I expected recovery in others, but I soon learned that this did not happen. Once I acquired the humility to accept the fact that every Twelfth Step call was not going to result in a success, then I was open to receive the rewards of selfless giving. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Our faith should control the whole of our life. We alcoholics were living a divided life. We had to find a way to make it whole. When we were drinking, our lives were made up of a lot of scattered and unrelated pieces. We must pick up our lives and put them back together again. We do it by recovering a faith in a Divine Principle in the universe which hold us together and holds the whole universe together and gives it meaning and purpose. We surrender our disorganized lives to that Power, we get into harmony with the Divine Spirit, and our lives are made whole again. Is my life whole again? Meditation For The Day Avoid fear as you would a plague. Fear, even the smallest fear, is a hacking at the cords of faith that bind you to God. However small the fraying, in time those cords will wear thin, and then one disappointment or shock will make them snap. But for the little fears, the cords of faith would have held firm. Avoid depression, which is allied to fear. Remember that all fear is disloyalty to God. It is a denial of His care and protection. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may have such trust in God today that I will not fear anything too greatly. I pray that I may have assurance that God will take care of me in the long run. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Give Thanks, p.266 Though I still find it difficult to accept today's pain and anxiety with any great degree of serenity--as those more advanced in the spiritual life seem able to do--I can give thanks for present pain nevertheless. I find the willingness to do this by contemplating the lessons learned from past suffering--lessons which have led to the blessings I now enjoy. I can remember how the agonies of alcoholism, the pain of rebellion and thwarted pride, have often led me to God's grace, and so to a new freedom. Grapevine, March 1962 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Returning to Basics Continuing. Now and then, an AA discussion focuses on the theme of "returning to the basics." This is a good time to shake out the excessive concerns that might be cluttering up our lives. No matter how long we've been living in sobriety, we can never afford to dismiss the basic reasons we came to AA in the first place. We had made a mess of our lives, and no human power could relieve our alcoholism. By accepting and admitting this, we were able to find a new way of life. This was also our admission ticket to the larger society, where people are concerned about many things. We sometimes become too caught up in all these concerns even to the extent of forgetting our own needs. It's good, occasionally, to focus a meeting on AA basics. they are as essential today as they were when we first knew that we needed them. I'll remind myself today that the basics give me a firm foundation on which to stand. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. ---Edith Wharton Our Higher Power is the candle. And our hearts, like a mirror, reflect a warm, loving glow. But when we used alcohol and other drugs, we tired to be the candle. We wanted to have control. Many of us acted like this to hide how out of control we felt. We never thought we could be happy by admitting we were out of control. In recovery, we accept that it’s okay to be the mirror. We accept that our Higher Power is the candle that guides us. We want to be the mirror that reflects how much our Higher Power loves us. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thank-you for the light and warmth You give me. Action for the Day: Tonight, I’ll light a candle and place it in front of a mirror. I’ll study how they work together to light the room. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Somewhere along the line of development we discover what we really are, and then we make our real decision for which we are responsible. Make that decision primarily for yourself because you can never really live anyone else's life, not even your own child's. The influence you exert is through your own life and what you become yourself. --Eleanor Roosevelt Taking full responsibility for who we are, choosing friends, making plans for personal achievement, consciously deciding day by day where we want to go with our lives, ushers in adventure such as we've never known. For many of us, months and years were wasted while we passively hid from life in alcohol, drugs, food, and other people. But we are breathing new life today. Recovery offers us, daily, the opportunity to participate in the adventure of life. It offers us the opportunity to share our talents, our special gifts with those with whom we share moments of time. We are becoming, every moment of time. As are our friends. Discovering who and what we really are, alone and with one another within our experiences is worthy of celebration. I will congratulate others and myself today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Usually the family should not try to tell your story. When possible, avoid meeting a man through his family. Approach through a doctor or an institution is a better bet. If your man needs hospitalization, he should have it, but not forcibly unless he is violent. Let the doctor, if he will, tell him he has something in the way of a solution. p. 91 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. It started with simple episodes at school. My buddies and I would split a six-pack over lunch and thought nobody would notice. It never occurred to me that a thirteen-year-old could not easily hide the effects of a single beer. By the time I was fourteen or fifteen, things were getting far more serious, and the consequences of my drinking were getting more costly in every way--socially, morally, financially. pp. 486-487 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Like most people, we have found that we can take our big lumps as they come. But also like others, we often discover a greater challenge in the lesser and more continuous problems of life. Our answer is in still more spiritual development. Only by this means can we improve our chances for really happy and useful living. And as we grow spiritually, we find that our old attitudes toward our instincts need to undergo drastic revisions. Our desires for emotional security and wealth, for personal prestige and power, for romance, and for family satisfactions--all these have to be tempered and redirected. We have learned that the satisfaction of instincts cannot be the sole end and aim of our lives. If we place instincts first, we have got the cart before the horse; we shall be pulled backward into disillusionment. But when we are willing to place spiritual growth first-- then and only then do we have a real chance. p. 114 ************************************************** ********* Our struggle to be perfect at every stage of life is a common element of the human conditions. What comes with age and wisdom is acceptance of our imperfections. --Karen Casey & Martha Vanceburg Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water's calm. --Malaysian Proverb "One thing at a time, all things in succession. That which grows slowly endures." --J. G. Hubbard "Very often a change of self is needed more than a change of scene." --Arthur Christopher Benson For it is in giving that we receive. --Saint Francis of Assisi My spiritual home. is one of peace, serenity, and contentment. --Shelley I can go to a quiet spiritual place, one with God, and feel this busy world around me, is refreshed in beauty, love, and serenity. --Shelley ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PESSIMISM "Pessimist: One who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both." -- Oscar Wilde Today I am able to see how I was always looking on the "gloomy" side of life. The glass was always half empty! I can remember thinking that nothing good was ever going to happen, life was to be endured, everybody had a price and people were all selfishly out for themselves. I projected onto others my own sickness, my own despair, my own pessimism. It was a suicidal existence. Today I choose to be a positive and creative person who refuses to be surrounded by negativism. My attitude in life makes all the difference to my enjoyment of life. Today my glass is more than half full and I am happy. In the gift of choice, I recognize my potential joy. ************************************************** ********* "I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety." Psalm 4:8 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7 In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. Proverbs 16:9 The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you are spirit and they are life. John 6:63 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Thoughts are powerful, so pay close attention to what you think about. Lord, help me to think thoughts of love, peace and abundance so that this becomes my experience. There is a time for everything. Take time to pray, to sing, to laugh, to work and to touch the hearts of others. Lord, help me be aware that today will never return so that I will not misuse my time or waste it unwisely. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Overcoming Self-Obsession "In living the steps, we begin to let go of our self-obsession." Basic Text p.94 Many of us came to the program convinced that our feelings, our wants, and our needs were of the utmost importance to everyone. We had practiced a lifetime of self-seeking, self-centered behavior and believed it was the only way to live. That self-centeredness doesn't cease just because we stop using drugs. Perhaps we attend our first NA function and are positive that everyone in the room is watching us, judging us, and condemning us. We may demand that our sponsor be on call to listen to us whenever we want - and they, in turn, may gently suggest that the world does not revolve around us. The more we insist on being the center of the universe, the less satisfied we will be with our friends, our sponsor, and everything else. Freedom from self-obsession can be found through concentrating more on the needs of others and less on our own. When others have problems, we can offer help. When newcomers need rides to meetings, we can pick them up. When friends are lonely, we can spend time with them. When we find ourselves feeling unloved or ignored, we can offer the love and attention we need to someone else. In giving, we receive much more in return - and that's a promise we can trust. Just for today: I will share the world with others, knowing they are just as important as I am. I will nourish my spirit by giving of myself. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Give to the world all that you have, And the best will come back to you. --Mary Ainge De Vere When we share something of our own with a friend, it gives both of us a special feeling. Generosity blesses the giver as much as the receiver. Sometimes we feel selfish, wanting to hoard all our treats or treasures. But when we secretly hide them away, we cheat even ourselves from enjoying them. Giving love and friendship to others works in just the same way. When we express love and kindness to others, we feel more love toward ourselves. Though we may not understand just how it works, we can be certain it does. The more of anything we give away to others, the greater our own rewards will be. How can I practice generosity today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Faith is the bird that sings when the dawn is still dark. ---Rabindranath Tagore There may be many things in our lives that seem unsure or doubtful. Whatever our hope or personal need today, we are not given the knowledge that tells us how things will turn out. In the predawn darkness we don't know how the day will unfold. Sometimes faith is simply a matter of continuing with our program in the midst of our doubt. Then we can be certain that whatever direction events take, whatever pain or trial we must deal with, we will still have ourselves because we have been faithful today. Ultimately, it is when we have ourselves and our integrity that we are on the recovery path. It is our faith that keeps us there regardless of the setbacks and personal moments of darkness we each must meet. I will be faithful to my program, even in the darkest moment of doubt or fear, and it will carry me through. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Somewhere along the line of development we discover what we really are, and then we make our real decision for which we are responsible. Make that decision primarily for yourself because you can never really live anyone else's life, not even your own child's. The influence you exert is through your own life and what you become yourself. --Eleanor Roosevelt Taking full responsibility for who we are, choosing friends, making plans for personal achievement, consciously deciding day by day where we want to go with our lives, ushers in adventure such as we've never known. For many of us, months and years were wasted while we passively hid from life in alcohol, drugs, food, and other people. But we are breathing new life today. Recovery offers us, daily, the opportunity to participate in the adventure of life. It offers us the opportunity to share our talents, our special gifts with those with whom we share moments of time. We are becoming, every moment of time. As are our friends. Discovering who and what we really are, alone and with one another within our experiences is worthy of celebration. I will congratulate others and myself today. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Expectations of Others It is our job to identify our needs, and then determine a balanced way of getting those needs met. We ultimately expect our Higher Power and the Universe - not one particular person - to be our source. It is unreasonable to expect anyone to be able or willing to meet our every request. We are responsible for asking for what we want and need. It's the other person's responsibility to freely choose whether or not to respond to our request. If we try to coerce or force another to be there for us, that's controlling. There's a difference between asking and demanding. We want love that is freely given. It is unreasonable and unhealthy to expect one person to be the source for meeting all our needs. Ultimately, we will become angry and resentful, maybe even punishing, toward that person for not supporting us as we expected. It is reasonable to have certain and well defined expectations of our spouse, children, and friends. If a person cannot or will not be there for us, then we need to take responsibility for ourselves in that relationship. We may need to set a boundary, alter our expectations, or change the limits of the relationship to accommodate that person's unavailability. We do this for ourselves. It is reasonable to sprinkle our wants and needs around and to be realistic about how much we ask or expect of any particular person. We can trust ourselves to know what's reasonable. The issue of expectations goes back to knowing that we are responsible for identifying our needs, believing they deserve to get met, and discover an appropriate, satisfactory way to do that in our life. Today, I will strive for reasonable expectations about getting my needs met in relationships. Today I know that I am powerless over all the addictions, obsessions, compulsions and dependencies in my life. Today I am willing to let them go to a power greater than myself. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey to the Heart for December Discover Common Bonds "So many people have lost their families," the man said to me. "I have. But I'm beginning to discover that I'm part of a larger family,too. I'm beginning to see my connections to people all over the world." We all have people we love deeply and dearly, those people we call our family. We have blood ties, genetic ties, long-term relationships with the people in our life. But as we open our hearts, we'll discover a larger family,too. We have a kinship with those we've never met, even if they live in other cultures. We share many of the same emotional responses to the experiences in our lives, even though our journey may be taking place on different parts of the planet. If we study history we will see our connection to those who have lived before. The hardships they experienced, the lessons they had to face, were similar in many ways to those we face today. Lessons repeat themselves. The ones that are true seem to last. That's why they're called universal truths. What are you going through in your life right now? Don't feel you're the only one. Open your eyes. Open your heart to your connections with your larger family. Let them share their stories with you. Let them share their strengths, hopes, fears, and joys. Stop looking for what's different and what makes you separate and apart. Go on an adventure of discovering your common bonds. You're not alone. We're in this together. That's why it's called universal love. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go It’s sweet right now It was an odd friendship right from the start. I was in a local store, trying to buy some new rocks– a crystal, maybe some lapis– someting beautiful to change the energy in my house. “Kyle can help you out,” the salesclerk said. “He knows all about our stones.” Kyle talked to me for a while about what stones I might like. Then I left the store. A few days later, I wandered back in, and we talked a little more. By the time the first year passed, we had become pretty good friends. At that time, neither of us had a romantic relationship in our lives. We just hung out, went to restaurants, saw movies together, and talked on the phone. One year passed, then two, then three, then five. We started a bookstore together, and together we closed it down. Now Kyle’s seeing someone romantically. I am, too. We’re still best friends, but the wheel of life has turned again. We were talking on the phone just the other day. “For all our complaining and grumbling and carrying on, we sure had some good times,” I said. “Yes,” he agreed. “This is one of the best times in my life.” The ordinary moments that we each live through, in retrospect, look so rich and full. Why don’t we take all that wisdom and all that poignant reminiscing and realize that we’re having the best time in our life right now? God, this is the day you have made. I will rejoice and be glad in it. *************************************** Pushing Buttons Untended Pain by Madisyn Taylor When somebody continues to open our old wounds on purpose, they must be told that their behavior is no longer welcome. We’ve all had our buttons pushed to the point where we feel we can’t take it any more, and chances are, we’ve all pushed somebody else’s buttons, with or without knowing it. The button pusher may not be conscious of what they’re doing, but in the end the buttons belong to us, and we are the ones who must deal with what comes up. The more we take responsibility for our own feelings and reactions, the less tender these buttons will be. We’ve all had the experience of having someone snap at us, seemingly out of nowhere. This happens when we unconsciously push a button in someone else we didn’t even know was there. This can happen with a complete stranger and sometimes with a person we’ve known and been close to for years. We ourselves may have a relationship with someone whose buttons we secretly like to push. Buttons are just soft spots that have been touched one too many times, and they symbolize some pain that needs to be acknowledged and healed. This may be a wound from childhood, or some recent trauma, that we haven’t adequately tended. Whatever the case, when our buttons get pushed, the person who most needs our attention and caring is us, and blaming the button pusher only distracts us from finding a true resolution to our suffering. At the same time, if someone continually opens our wounds so that they never have time to heal, we are well within our rights to set a boundary with that person. Compulsive button pushers, who seem to find pleasure or satisfaction in hurting us, are not welcome in our personal space. In the end, knowing where our buttons are enables us to do the work necessary to heal. Freedom comes when we deal with the pain behind the button, thus disconnecting our automatic reaction to being pushed. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day When we compulsively strive for perfection, we invariably injure ourselves. For one thing, we end up creating big problems from little ones. For another, we become frustrated and filled with despair when we’re unable to meet the impossible goals we’ve set for ourselves. And finally, we decrease our capability to deal with life and reality as it is. Can I learn to yield a little, here and there? Can I apply myself with a quiet mind only to what is possible and attainable? Today I Pray May I see that striving for an impossible accomplishment provides me with an ever-ready excuse for not making it. It is also an indication of my loss of reality-sense which ought to involve knowing what I can do and then doing it. With the help of the group and my Higher Power, may I learn to set “reasonable goals.” These may seem ridiculously small to me, after years of “thinking big.” But, by breaking down my projects into several smaller ones, may I find that I actually can accomplish some high goals. Today I Will Remember Break down large goals into smaller ones. *************************************** One More Day Change does not change tradition. If strengthens it. Change is a challenge and an opportunity, not a threat. – Prince Philip At holiday times and anniversaries and birthdays, we may lament, “I can’t entertain anymore. I just don’t have the room. I don’t have the strength either.” Is what we are telling ourselves really true? Are our friends and families so shallow that they come to our homes only for roast beef or turkey? Do we really have to give up the joy of having company? Quickly we recognize the nonsense of such thoughts and cope with this situation in the same way we have with so many others — we change and we adapt. We can still welcome our loved ones into our homes. In the simpler meals and the casual atmosphere, our friends and family will find what they have come for — assurance that we still value their company. I will serve my guest as always — with love and fellowship. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ SPIRITUALITY VS RELIGION ~ Religion is a way for people to get to heaven, and Spirituality is a way for people to get out of hell. Anonymous Twelve Stepper I was raised in a home that was strongly religious. All of its standards and rules were based on religion, and on the standards of a rigid God Who is perfect, and Who calls His followers to be perfect. My mother is a person who seemed to find her mission in life by telling people how far they fell short of that perfection. I learned very early that I did not and would never measure up; that being part of religion meant accepting my inability to excel at its tenets. But when I came into this program, I began to learn about spirtuality. I learned about God from people who were not perfect, and who could accept themselves as they are. I learned about mercy and forgiveness from people with different faiths than my own; I learned about trusting God from people who did not even believe in a Supreme Being. What I learned has put "flesh" on the words of the Scriptures that I learned as a child. It has put life into my faith, for the first time, and it has helped me learn that I am worthwhile and acceptable just as I am. One Day at a Time . . . I give my life into the keeping of the God of my understanding, and know that my best is the least, and the most, that He expects from me. Donna ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We were having trouble with personal relationships, we couldn't control our emotional natures, we were a prey to misery and depression, we couldn't make a living, we had a feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were unhappy, we couldn't seem to be of real help to other people - was not a basic solution of these bedevilments more important than whether we should see newsreels of lunar flight? Of course it was. - Pg. 52 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote When intense cravings for our drug of choice overwhelm us, we immediately talk to another person in recovery, no matter the time. Our program teaches us to rely on each other and they will welcome the contact! Give me the strength to contact another clean and sober person BEFORE I think of satisfying that craving. The Creative Power of My Thoughts Today, I recognize that I tend to produce in my life what I feel is true for myself. Thoughts have a creative power of their own. If I look closely, I can see my thoughts come to life. I create the possibility of what I would like by first experiencing it in my mind. I will visualize what I would like to have in my life in my mind's eye. I will accept what I see in my inner eye as being there for me, and I will fully participate in my vision as if it were mine. I will be specific about what I see, smell, feel, and I will accept my inner vision as fully as possible. I will enjoy my vision, then let it go and move on in my day, releasing it with no thought of controlling it further. I will let it happen, if it is right for me, in God's time. All good things are possible for me. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote We may have empathy for your situation but we will not pity you. We know that pitying you leads to you pitying yourself which leads to mind-affecting chemicals. Rather than pity you, if you need an attitude adjustment, it's very likely a fellow group member will let you know. Attitudes are contagious. Is mine worth catching? "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Don't 'people please', 'Higher Power Please.' Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know that I have done the best I can with my life. Today I know that I am at choice, and what I choose right now creates new memories. Today I choose to continue to do the very best. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote They take good scotch, put juice, soda, bitters and God knows what in it, shake it up, stick an umbrella in it - That's alcohol abuse. - Anon. |
December 21
Daily Reflections LISTEN, SHARE AND PRAY When working with a man and his family, you should take care not to participate in their quarrels. You may spoil your chance of being helpful if you do. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 100 When trying to help a fellow alcoholic, I've given in to an impulse to give advice, and perhaps that's inevitable. But allowing others the right to be wrong reaps its own benefits. The best I can do - and it sounds easier than it is to put into practice - is to listen, share personal experience, and pray for others. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Have I ceased being inwardly defeated, at war with myself? Have I given myself freely to A.A. and to the Higher Power? Have I got over being sick inside? Am I still wandering mentally or am I "on the beam?" I can face anything, if I am sure I am on the way. When I am sure, I should bet my life on A.A. I have learned how the program works. Now will I follow it with all I have, with all I can give, with all my might, with all my life? Am I going to let A.A. principles guide the rest of my life? Meditation For The Day In this time of quiet meditation, follow the pressure of the Lord's leading. In all decisions to be made today, yield to the gentle pressure of your conscience. Stay or go as that pressure indicates. Take the events of today as part of God's planning and ordering. He may lead you to a right decision. Wait quietly until you have an inner urge, a leading, a feeling that a thing is right, a pressure on your will by the spirit of God. Prayer For The Day I pray that today I may try to follow the inner pressure of God's leading. I pray that I may try to follow my conscience and do what seems right today. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Neither Dependence nor Self-Sufficiency, p.265 When we insisted, like infants, that people protect and take care of us or that the world owed us a living, then the result was unfortunate. The people we most loved often pushed us aside or perhaps deserted us entirely. Our disillusionment was hard to bear. We failed to see that, though adult in years, we were still behaving childishly, trying to turn everybody--friends, wives, husbands, even the world itself--into protective parents. We refused to learn that overdependence upon people is unsuccessful because all people are fallible, and even the best of them will sometimes let us down, especially when our demands for attention become unreasonable. ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Keeping the Faith with Guidance Good Orderly Direction Does guidance from our Higher Power always come through? We must believe that it does, even when we don't seem to receive a visible answer. Spiritual guidance usually doesn't come as we think it should. What we're likely to find instead is that over time, a number of unrelated events come together for a good purpose. Although this appears to be chance or coincidence, very important outcomes often develop from simple happenings___ maybe just from meeting someone on the street. We can never really determine how any chain of events will play out. The best we can do is to continue seeking guidance while following the highest principles in our program. Many chance happenings will be recognized as guidance when we look back at an entire chain of events. My best way to seek guidance is simply to remember today that my life and affairs are in God's care and keeping. The highest good will come from this. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Don't give your advice before you are called upon. Desiderius Erasmus If someone wants your advice, the person will ask for it. That's one reason why in Twelve Step programs we don't go around trying to talk people into joining. But people will ask us for advice. They'll see how we've changed, and they'll want what we have. All we have to do is tell them where we found it--in AA, NA or another Twelve Step group. We don't tell them what to do. We tell them our own story--what it was like, what happened, and where we are now. And we invite them to join us. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me carry the healing message of the program to these who ask for advice. Action for the Day: I'll make a decision to spend time with the next person who ask for my help. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Every person is responsible for all the good within the scope of her abilities, and no more . . . --Gail Hamilton We have been given the gift of life. Our recovery validates that fact. Our pleasure with that gift is best expressed by the fullness with which we greet and live life. We need not back off from the invitations our experiences offer. Each one of them gives us a chance, a bit different from all other chances, to fulfill part of our purpose in the lives of others. It has been said that the most prayerful life is the one most actively lived. Full encounter with each moment is evidence of our trust in the now and thus our trust in our higher power. When we fear what may come or worry over what has gone before, we're not trusting in God. Growth in the program will help us remember that fact, thus releasing us to participate more actively in the special circumstances of our lives. When we look around us today, we know that the persons in our midst need our best, and they're not there by accident but by Divine appointment. We can offer them the best we have--acceptance, love, support, our prayers, and we can know that is God's plan for our lives and theirs, I will celebrate my opportunities for goodness today. They'll bless me in turn. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS When your man is better, the doctor might suggest a visit from you. Though you have talked with the family, leave them out of the first discussion. Under these conditions your prospect will see he is under not pressure. He will feel he can deal with you without being nagged by his family. Call on him while he is still jittery. He may be more receptive when depressed. p. 91 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. A turning point came when I was fifteen. My mom was in the middle of an ugly divorce. Through nobody's fault but my own, I decided that I had the answer. In a drunken brawl, having planned every step of my actions, I attempted to kill my stepfather. I vaguely remember being dragged out of the house by the police and came to, yet again, trying to answer for what I had done while drunk. The results were that I was eventually given a choice by the judge: Go to juvenile hall until I was twenty-five years old, or leave the state until I was at least twenty-one years old. I did not want juvenile hall, so I did the math and decided the better part of valor was to get as far away from there as I could. p. 487 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." After we come into A.A., if we go on growing, our attitudes and actions toward security--emotional security and financial security--commence to change profoundly. Our demand for emotional security, for our own way, had constantly thrown us into unworkable relations with other people. Though we were sometimes quite unconscious of this, the result always had been the same. Either we had tried to play God and dominate those about us, or we had insisted on being overdependent upon them. Where people had temporarily let us run their lives as though they were still children, we had felt very happy and secure ourselves. But when they finally resisted or ran away, we were bitterly hurt and disappointed. We blamed them, being quite unable to see that our unreasonable demands had been the cause. p. 115 ************************************************** ********* Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength. --Arnold Schwarzenegger Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without. --Buddha In helping others, we shall help ourselves, for whatever good we give out completes the circle and comes back to us. --Flora Edwards As long as I am willing, God will always provide the answers. No one said I would like them, but I accept them. --Shelley "Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must undergo the fatigue of supporting it." --Thomas Paine Sobriety is a journey of joyful discovery. Recovery is not a race. Every recovery from alcoholism began with one sober hour. ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation ORIGINALITY "Originality exists in every individual because each of us differ from the others. We are all primary --numbers divisible only by ourselves." Jean Guitton For too many years I tried to be "the same" as other people; matched their styles, repeated their words, did what they wanted, lived to please a crowd of people I did not really know and they certainly did not know me! I said other people's prayers, quoted other people's opinions and memorized the ideas of others and I felt empty. Today I value the lives of others but I am slowly beginning to explore my place in this universe. Today I accept the "specialness" that is me; that uniqueness makes me God's miracle. Now others are listening and benefiting from my life. ************************************************** ********* For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Ephesians 5:8-10 On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?" "What is written in the Law?" he replied. "How do you read it?" He answered: "`Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, `Love your neighbor as yourself.'" "You have answered correctly," Jesus replied. "Do this and you will live." Luke 10:25-28 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Growth is not easy. It comes from fully experiencing each situation and mastering it with understanding. Lord, Your presence in my life dispels my fears and guides me through all of life's circumstances. Today be cheerful when it is difficult and patient when that, too, is difficult. Lord, I will let Your love for me flow through me and touch those around me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Acceptance And Change "Freedom to change seems to come after acceptance of ourselves." Basic Text pg. 56 Fear and denial are the opposites of acceptance. None of us are perfect, even in our own eyes; all of us have certain traits that, given the chance, we would like to change. We sometimes become overwhelmed when contemplating how far short we fall of our ideals, so overwhelmed that we fear there's no chance of becoming the people we'd like to be. That's when our defense mechanism of denial kicks in, taking us to the opposite extreme: nothing about ourselves needs changing, we tell ourselves, so why worry? Neither extreme gives us the freedom to change. Whether we are long-time NA members or new to recovery, the freedom to change is acquired by working the Twelve Steps. When we admit our powerlessness and the unmanageability of our lives, we counteract the lie that says we don't have to change. In coming to believe that a Power greater than we are can help us, we lose our fear that we are damaged beyond repair; we come to believe we can change. We turn ourselves over to the care of the God of our understanding and tap the strength we need to make a thorough, honest examination of ourselves. We admit to God, to ourselves, and to another human being what we've found. We accept the good and the bad in ourselves; with this acceptance, we become free to change. Just for today: I want to change. By working the steps, I will counter fear and denial and find the acceptance needed to change. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I came to see the damage that was done and the treasures that prevail. --Adrienne Rich It takes great courage to face ourselves--to look honestly and fearlessly at our behavior, especially if we have done and said things we are not proud of. We may have caused a lot of sadness in our own and others' lives. It's not easy to look at. But let's remember, too, that what we do and say is not all of who we are. And let's also look at the treasures in ourselves--those things we have said and done that have brought great comfort, joy, and love into the lives of others. Beneath the negative parts of ourselves, deep within us, is a kernel of good. Let's look for that as well, and water it so it can grow--so we can grow into the persons we are meant to be. What is the best part of me, and how can I share it today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. He not busy being born is busy dying. --Bob Dylan An old story has been told of men in the program asking an alcoholic who had a slip, "What Step were you working on at the time?" The man who slipped was not working on any Step, and that is part of how he lost his sobriety. The message of the story is that when we are not busy being born spiritually, we are losing ground. It is essential to always be focusing our attention on one of the Steps. Each time we work a Step again, we are at a new place in life, and the Step will inspire something new in us just as it did the first time. Although we may know the program well, keeping it as our center protects us from being reactive to the events and pressures in our lives. We are less likely to feel overwhelmed by situations or react with shame or anger. As long as we live, we are in need of being renewed. Today, I will choose one of the Steps and think about its meaning for me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Every person is responsible for all the good within the scope of her abilities, and no more . . . --Gail Hamilton We have been given the gift of life. Our recovery validates that fact. Our pleasure with that gift is best expressed by the fullness with which we greet and live life. We need not back off from the invitations our experiences offer. Each one of them gives us a chance, a bit different from all other chances, to fulfill part of our purpose in the lives of others. It has been said that the most prayerful life is the one most actively lived. Full encounter with each moment is evidence of our trust in the now and thus our trust in our higher power. When we fear what may come or worry over what has gone before, we're not trusting in God. Growth in the program will help us remember that fact, thus releasing us to participate more actively in the special circumstances of our lives. When we look around us today, we know that the persons in our midst need our best, and they're not there by accident but by Divine appointment. We can offer them the best we have--acceptance, love, support, our prayers, and we can know that is God's plan for our lives and theirs, I will celebrate my opportunities for goodness today. They'll bless me in turn. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Balance Strive for balanced expectations of others. Strive for healthy tolerance. In the past, we may have tolerated too much or too little. We may have expected too much or too little. We may swing from tolerating abuse, mistreatment, and deception to refusing to tolerate normal, human, imperfect behaviors from people. Although it's preferable not to remain in either extreme too long, that is how people change - real people who struggle imperfectly toward better lives, improved relationships, and more effective relationship behaviors. But if we are open to ourselves and to the recovery process, we will, at some time, begin another transition: it becomes time to move away from extremes, toward balance. We can trust ourselves and the recovery process to bring us to a balanced place of tolerance, giving, understanding, and expectations - of others and ourselves. We can each find our own path to balance as we begin and continue recovery. Today, I will practice acceptance with others and myself for the way we change. If I have had to swing to the other extreme of a behavior, I will accept that as appropriate, for a time. But I will make my goal one of balanced tolerance and expectations of others and myself. Today I seek spiritual understanding beyond everything else. I choose peace and love and joy as my goals. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Reduce Your Stress “Stress can be caused by many things,” a man, a healing professional, said. “It can be caused by toxins in the air, by food, work, money, or love. And sometimes tension and stress are caused by reacting to old beliefs– the messages in your mind.” We can’t always eliminate the situations that produce stress. Some stress in life is inevitable; it is part of being alive. Stress is often the impetus that moves us forward into growth, into emotional release and healing, into awareness and change. While we can’t and don’t want to eliminate all the stress in our lives, we can reduce its impact. We can eat foods we respond well to. We can monitor the quality of the air we breathe in many situations. We can leave a work or love situation that has become too stressful, or we can take better care of ourselves in those situations we choose to stay in. And we can work on changing stress-producing beliefs within ourselves. I can’t measure up. I can’t get the job done. I won’t be liked. I can’t trust myself. Many of these beliefs are outdated reactions to other times in our lives, and now we know we have the power to change them. What’s causing stress in your life? Do the things you can to reduce stress in your life. Reduce as much toxicity in your environment and in yourself as you can. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Lose those expectations So you meet someone, become infatuated, date, and allow your mind to create an exaggerated image of that person. Soon you find that he’s your soul mate. You don’t want to live without him; he means everything to you. And then he stumbles, somewhere around three months, maybe six months. He fails to meet your expectations. He loses soul mate status. “You just aren’t the person I thought you were,” you say, walking out the door. Of course he isn’t. He’s a person, not a figment of your imagination. Lighten up. Let each person be themselves. When we’re with someone, either as a friend or as a lover, a good deal of the success or failure of the relationship can be traced to our expectations. We get angry when we expect someone to behave in a certain way and he or she doesn’t. We feel cheated, lied to, and disappointed. Here we stacked all of our chips on a certain number coming up, and when it doesn’t, we get mad. Lose those expectations. If you enjoy another person’s company, then enjoy it cleanly and without expectations. People are people. They will stumble, they will get back up again– or not. You cannot control them. All you can do is learn from them, love them, and enjoy their company when they’re around. Drop the expectations. Allow people to just be themselves. Appreciate them for why they are. Let the love that you have for them grow out of that appreciation, instead of out of what you expect in what writer Natalie Goldberg calls “your monkey mind.” God, help me remember that when I lose my expectations I just might find real love. *************************************** Listening with Your Heart Less Thinking and More Feeling by Madisyn Taylor When we begin to listen with our hearts rather than our heads, our whole world changes and becomes softer. Most of us were born and raised in cultures that value the head over the heart and, as a result, we place our own hearts below our heads in a sort of inner hierarchy of which we may not be conscious. What this means is that we tend to listen and respond from the neck up, often leaving the rest of our bodies with little or no say in most matters. This is a physical habit, which sometimes feels as ingrained as the way we breathe or walk. However, with effort and awareness, we can shift the energy into our hearts, listening and responding from this much deeper, more resonant place. The brain has a masterful way of imposing structure and order on the world, creating divisions and categories, devising plans and strategies. In many ways, we have our brains to thank for our survival on this planet. However, as is so clear at this time, we also need the wisdom of our hearts if we wish to continue surviving in a viable way. When we listen from our heart, the logical grid of the brain tends to soften and melt, which enables us to perceive the interconnectedness beneath the divisions and categories we use to organize the world. We begin to understand that just as the heart underlies the brain, this interconnectedness underlies everything. Many agree that this is the most important work we can do at this time in history, and there are many practices at our disposal. For a simple start, try sitting with a friend and asking him to tell you about his life at this moment. For 10 minutes or more, try to listen without responding verbally, offering suggestions, or brainstorming solutions. Instead, breathe into your heart and your belly, listening and feeling instead of thinking. When you do this, you may find that it’s much more difficult to offer advice and much easier to identify with the feelings your friend is sharing. You may also find that your friend opens up more, goes deeper, and feels he has really been heard. If you also feel great warmth and compassion, almost as if you are seeing your friend for the first time, then you will know that you have begun to tap the power of listening with your heart. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Each of us in The Program can, in our own time and own way, reach the triumphant spiritual awakening that is described in the Twelfth Step. The spiritual awakening is a deep-down knowledge that we are no longer alone and helpless. It’s also a deep-down awareness that we’ve learned certain truths which we can now transmit to others so that perhaps they, too, can be helped. Am I keeping myself in constant readiness for the spiritual awakening which is certain to come to me as I practice The Steps and surrender my will to God’s will? Today I Pray May I be steady, not expecting that my spiritual awakening will startle me like an alarm clock into sudden awareness of a Higher Power. It may settle on me so quietly that I may not recognize precisely when my money of awareness comes. The clue may come in my desire to Twelfth_Step others. May I realize, then, that I have accepted the principles of The Program and am at home with the spiritual transformation I feel in myself. Today I Will Remember My spiritual awakening is my first private moment with God. *************************************** One More Day To know after absences the familiar street and road and village and house is to know again the satisfaction of home. – Hal Borland Home is a word that carries all kinds of meanings for us. For the majority, home has always been our anchor — the place where we can go even when we have had the worst possible of all days. Home usually means love, but it certainly means security and comfort. As the years go by we understand that home has little to do with a physical structure. It can be a tiny apartment or an elaborate mansion. Or — better still — it can be the special comfort and security we feel within ourselves. It is , after all, what we bring to it and to the people around us. Home is, and always has been, where our heart is. My home acts as one of the roots of my life, and it has all the qualities that I bring to it. ***************************************** One Day At A Time BABY STEPS "I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble." Helen Keller (born Helen Adams Keller (1880 – 1968) American author, activist and lecturer and the first deafblind person to graduate from college). From as far back as I can remember, I believed that, in order to be worthy or loved, I had to achieve great things. It didn't matter what it was but I set out to be the best at whatever I did, hoping that would make me feel better. Whether it was academic or one of the many diets or diet clubs I tried, it was the same story, and failure was totally unacceptable. Delayed gratification was definitely not part of my vocabulary, and so things had to be done or achieved in record time. If I wanted something done, it had to be done today, if not yesterday. Everything I did was done compulsively. I was, as one person in a meeting described, a "human doing," not a "human being". Of course the things I could never really achieve were permanent weight loss and the serenity that comes with recovery. These seemed to elude me when I first came into the program, mainly because I expected to do it perfectly and in a very short time. After all, I had lost weight before, and quickly too. I had to realize that recovery is not a race, that this is a journey, not a destination. I don't have to do it all in one day, nor do I have to be the best at it. All I need to do is to take baby steps, one day at a time, and I will recover as God wills me to do. I just need to put one foot in front of the other and do what is before me. Recovery is cumulative and I build on it, day by day. One Day at a Time . . . I do the footwork and put my trust in my Higher Power, believing that, as I do what I need to do for today, God's healing power will come to me in the form of recovery. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. We asked His protection and care with complete abandon. - Pg. 59 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote There is a certain universality to the truths taught in our 12 step programs. They are nothing new. These principles are derived from eons of experience and spirituality. What is new is our personal understanding that living these principles gives us a reprieve from our addiction. Thank you God, as I understand You, for my daily reprieve from addiction based on my sincere attempt to practice these principles. Standing in Self Today, I own the truth of my recovery. If I am to stand centered and strong within my life and self, I will need to plant a garden within my own soul. A garden for me to nurture and to nurture me. A haven of beauty. I will find my own voice and sing my song because if I don't sing it, it will not be sung. It is all I have and it is enough. I do not need to prove anything to anyone anymore. I have come home - to me. The truth is, I was here all along, only I forgot to look for myself. Instead, I searched for me in other people's meaning and became lost in their stories. I am not lost today. I know that there is nowhere to look for me but within myself, and no one to lead me there but me. Thank you, life, for letting me see this. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When working Steps Six and Seven we honestly have to ask ourselves 'Do I really want to give up the defect? Or do I just want to give up the result of the defect?' Being an alcoholic does not give me the excuse to act alcoholically. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You can be a human being-you don't have to be a human doing. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I trust God's plan for me today. I know that I am being guided at all times. I know all I need to know in any given moment. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Knowing why I was an alcoholic doesn't help. The ship hits an iceberg, it's sinking, everyone is rowing away. But you're on the deck saying; 'I'm not leaving this baby until I understand what happened.' - Clancy I. |
December 22
Daily Reflections PRINCIPLES, NOT PERSONALITIES The way our "worthy" alcoholics have sometimes tried to judge the "less worthy" is, as we look back on it, rather comical. Imagine, if you can, one alcoholic judging another! THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 37 Who am I to judge anyone? When I first entered the Fellowship I found that I liked everyone. After all, A.A. was going to help me to a better way of life without alcohol. The reality was that I couldn't possibly like everyone, nor they me. As I've grown in the Fellowship, I've learned to love everyone just from listening to what they had to say. That person over there, or the one right here, may be the one God has chosen to give me the message I need for today. I must always remember to place principles above personalities. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day As we look back over our drinking careers, we must realize that our lives were a mess because we were a mess inside. The trouble was in us, not in life itself. Life itself was good enough, but we were looking at it the wrong way. We were looking at life through the bottom of a whiskey glass, and it was distorted. We could not see all the beauty and goodness and purpose in the world, because our vision was blurred. We were in a house with one-way glass in the windows. People could see us but we could not look out and see them and see what life meant to them and should mean to us. We were blind then, but now we can see. Can I now look at life as it really is? Meditation For The Day Fear no evil, because the power of God can conquer evil. Evil has power to seriously hurt only those who do not place themselves under the protection of the Higher Power. This is not a question of feeling, it is an assured fact of our experience. Say to yourself with assurance that whatever it is, no evil can seriously harm you as long as you depend on the Higher Power. Be sure of the protection of God's grace. Prayer For The Day I pray that fear of evil will not get me down. I pray that I may try to place myself today under the protection of God's grace. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The Step That Keeps Us growing, p.264 Sometimes, when friends tell us how well we are doing, we know better inside. We know we aren't doing well enough. We still can't handle life, as life is. There must be a serious flaw somewhere in our spiritual practice and development. What, then, is it? The chances are better than even that we shall locate our trouble in our misunderstanding or neglect of A.A.'s Step Eleven--prayer, meditation, and the guidance of God. The other Steps can keep most of us sober and somehow functioning. But Step Eleven can keep us growing, if we try hard and work at it continually. Grapevine, June 1958 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Watching what we think Personal Inventory. It's healthy for AA members to confess personal difficulties with destructive thinking. When we find ourselves becoming too irritable or impatient, it's important to admit this in meetings or one-on-one discussions. Usually, just the admission of the problem helps solve it. It's only false pride that makes us think we should be "above" destructive thinking. As human beings, we'll be susceptible to human failings no matter how long we've been sober. If we continue to watch what we think, we'll also be able to head off very serious problem before they get out of control. Far from being a sign that we're not working the program, the practice of weeding out our current faults is the Tenth Step in action. Continuing to take personal inventory and admitting our wrongs are a safeguard against trouble. Destructive thinking is no respecter of persons, and even as an older member, I could lapse into it today. I always have the Tenth Step, however, to get me back on track. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple It is possible to be different and still be right.--Anne Wilson Schaef Each of us is special. In some ways we're all different. It's a good thing too. We'd be bored if we were all the same. Sometimes though, we try to hide the special things about us. We don't want to be "different." But the ways that we're different makes us special. Others have a knack of fixing things. Some of us make beautiful art. Others are great with kids. Our Higher Power made us as different, as unique, as beautiful snowflakes. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me use my special gifts the way You want me to. Help me be thankful that You have given me something special to share with others. Action for the Day: I'll think of one thing about me that's special. I'll talk with my sponsor about it. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Every person is responsible for all the good within the scope of her abilities, and no more . . . --Gail Hamilton We have been given the gift of life. Our recovery validates that fact. Our pleasure with that gift is best expressed by the fullness with which we greet and live life. We need not back off from the invitations our experiences offer. Each one of them gives us a chance, a bit different from all other chances, to fulfill part of our purpose in the lives of others. It has been said that the most prayerful life is the one most actively lived. Full encounter with each moment is evidence of our trust in the now and thus our trust in our higher power. When we fear what may come or worry over what has gone before, we're not trusting in God. Growth in the program will help us remember that fact, thus releasing us to participate more actively in the special circumstances of our lives. When we look around us today, we know that the persons in our midst need our best, and they're not there by accident but by Divine appointment. We can offer them the best we have--acceptance, love, support, our prayers, and we can know that is God's plan for our lives and theirs, I will celebrate my opportunities for goodness today. They'll bless me in turn. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS See your man alone, if possible. At first engage in general conversation. After a while, turn the talk to some phase of drinking. Tell him enough about your drinking habits, symptoms, and experiences to encourage him to speak of himself. If he wishes to talk, let him do so. You will thus get a better idea of how you ought to proceed. If he is not communicative, give him a sketch or your drinking career up to the time you quit. But say nothing, for the moment, of how that was accomplished. If he is in a serious mood dwell on the troubles liquor has caused you, being careful not to moralize or lecture. If his mood is light, tell him humorous stories of your escapades. Get him to tell some of his. p. 91 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. Over the next thirteen years, until I graced the doors of A.A. for the first time, life really never got any better. I did, however, learn the fine art of geographics. From my home on the East Coast, I landed in Japan. Then I moved back to the United States and to New England, and then out to California, where over the next six years I saw my alcoholism take me to new depths of disgrace, embarrassment, and despair. As one of my early A.A. sponsors use to say, I didn't hang out with lower companions--I had become one. p. 487 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." When we had taken the opposite tack and had insisted, like infants ourselves, that people protect and take care of us or that the world owed us a living, then the result had been equally unfortunate. This often caused the people we had loved most to push us aside or perhaps desert us entirely. Our disillusionment had been hard to bear. We couldn't imagine people acting that way toward us. We had failed to see that though adult in years we were still behaving childishly, trying to turn everybody--friends, wives, husbands, even the world itself--into protective parents. We had refused to learn the very hard lesson that overdependence upon people is unsuccessful because all people are fallible, and even the best of them will sometimes let us down, especially when our demands for attention become unreasonable. p. 115 ************************************************** ********* Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When The language of truth is simple. --Czech Proverb "Laughter is by definition healthy." --Doris Lessing As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way. --Ralph Waldo Emerson Your vision will become clear only when You can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes. --Carl Jung "Being quiet does not mean sacrificing productivity." --Jane Nelson ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PERSEVERANCE "Great works are performed, not by strength, but perseverance." -- Samuel Johnson Today I saw a large 200-pound man drunk in a parking lot. Last night I heard a frail mother celebrate ten years of sobriety. The difference? Perseverance. People get what they really want in life. If you want sobriety more than anything else, are prepared to go to any lengths, then nothing will stop you. Perseverance reveals the "walk" as well as the "talk". Today I need to remember that what is worth having requires sacrifice and effort. God helps those who are prepared to help themselves. Today I intend to help myself to sobriety. I pray that I may persevere through my fears towards my goal. ************************************************** ********* Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these. Matthew 19:14 Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity. Timothy 4:12 Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong. Do everything in love. 1 Corinthians 16:13-14 The grace of the Lord Jesus be with you. My love to all of you in Christ Jesus. Amen. 1 Corinthians 16:23-24 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you want peace and goodness in your life you must be kind and loving. Lord, may I avoid creating misery so that my life will reflect my love for You. God's blessings never end and His mercies are forever. Lord, may I love others as You love me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today A New Way To Live "When at the end of the road we find that we can no longer function as a human being, either with or without drugs, we all face the same dilemma.... Either go on as best we can to the bitter ends-jails, institutions, or death-or find a new way to live." Basic Text pg. 84 What was the worst aspect of active addiction? For many of us, it wasn't the chance that we might die some day of our disease. The worst part was the living death we experienced every day, the never-ending meaninglessness of life. We felt like walking ghosts, not living, loving parts of the world around us. In recovery, we've come to believe that we're here for a reason: to love ourselves and to love others. In working the Twelve Steps, we have learned to accept ourselves. With that self-acceptance has come self-respect. We have seen that everything we do has an effect on others; we are a part of the lives of those around us, and they of ours. We've begun to trust other people and to acknowledge our responsibility to them. In recovery, we've come back to life. We maintain our new lives by contributing to the welfare of others and seeking each day to do that better - that's where the Tenth, Eleventh, and Twelfth Steps come in. The days of living like a ghost are past, but only so long as we actively seek to be healthy, loving, contributing parts of our own lives and the lives of others around us. Just for today: I have found a new way to live. Today, I will seek to serve others with love and to love myself. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I came to see the damage that was done and the treasures that prevail. --Adrienne Rich It takes great courage to face ourselves--to look honestly and fearlessly at our behavior, especially if we have done and said things we are not proud of. We may have caused a lot of sadness in our own and others' lives. It's not easy to look at. But let's remember, too, that what we do and say is not all of who we are. And let's also look at the treasures in ourselves--those things we have said and done that have brought great comfort, joy, and love into the lives of others. Beneath the negative parts of ourselves, deep within us, is a kernel of good. Let's look for that as well, and water it so it can grow--so we can grow into the persons we are meant to be. What is the best part of me, and how can I share it today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. He not busy being born is busy dying. --Bob Dylan An old story has been told of men in the program asking an alcoholic who had a slip, "What Step were you working on at the time?" The man who slipped was not working on any Step, and that is part of how he lost his sobriety. The message of the story is that when we are not busy being born spiritually, we are losing ground. It is essential to always be focusing our attention on one of the Steps. Each time we work a Step again, we are at a new place in life, and the Step will inspire something new in us just as it did the first time. Although we may know the program well, keeping it as our center protects us from being reactive to the events and pressures in our lives. We are less likely to feel overwhelmed by situations or react with shame or anger. As long as we live, we are in need of being renewed. Today, I will choose one of the Steps and think about its meaning for me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Every person is responsible for all the good within the scope of her abilities, and no more . . . --Gail Hamilton We have been given the gift of life. Our recovery validates that fact. Our pleasure with that gift is best expressed by the fullness with which we greet and live life. We need not back off from the invitations our experiences offer. Each one of them gives us a chance, a bit different from all other chances, to fulfill part of our purpose in the lives of others. It has been said that the most prayerful life is the one most actively lived. Full encounter with each moment is evidence of our trust in the now and thus our trust in our higher power. When we fear what may come or worry over what has gone before, we're not trusting in God. Growth in the program will help us remember that fact, thus releasing us to participate more actively in the special circumstances of our lives. When we look around us today, we know that the persons in our midst need our best, and they're not there by accident but by Divine appointment. We can offer them the best we have--acceptance, love, support, our prayers, and we can know that is God's plan for our lives and theirs, I will celebrate my opportunities for goodness today. They'll bless me in turn. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Balance Strive for balanced expectations of others. Strive for healthy tolerance. In the past, we may have tolerated too much or too little. We may have expected too much or too little. We may swing from tolerating abuse, mistreatment, and deception to refusing to tolerate normal, human, imperfect behaviors from people. Although it's preferable not to remain in either extreme too long, that is how people change - real people who struggle imperfectly toward better lives, improved relationships, and more effective relationship behaviors. But if we are open to ourselves and to the recovery process, we will, at some time, begin another transition: it becomes time to move away from extremes, toward balance. We can trust ourselves and the recovery process to bring us to a balanced place of tolerance, giving, understanding, and expectations - of others and ourselves. We can each find our own path to balance as we begin and continue recovery. Today, I will practice acceptance with others and myself for the way we change. If I have had to swing to the other extreme of a behavior, I will accept that as appropriate, for a time. But I will make my goal one of balanced tolerance and expectations of others and myself. Today I seek spiritual understanding beyond everything else. I choose peace and love and joy as my goals. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Practice the Power of Respect It is a quiet power, one that caught me by surprise on my journey. I had heard about it before, but somehow, in the shuffle of life, I had forgotten it: respect. Respect is a spiritual power, a power of the heart, one that’s closely connected to gratitude, yet somehow different. It is an attitude toward people, toward life, toward ourselves that only takes a moment to convey, yet somehow has far-reaching effects. It does more than free people to be themselves, it encourages them to be their best. It honors people, life, and the mysterious connection we each have to the Divine. Have a series of life experiences caused you to forget respect? In your anger, did you decide that certain persons or groups of people were undeserving of respect? Has familiarity with yourself or another caused you to forget to practice respect? Let go of the past; it’s over. But your power to transform the future has just begun. Respect and honor yourself. Respect the needs of your body, the needs of your heart, and the dictates of your soul. Respect the lives of others. Respect the gift of life. Bow in spirit to all you meet. Bow to the gifts of the universe– the sun, moon, earth, sea, and stars. Honor all that lives, the trees, the wildflowers, the eagle soaring high. The deer in the woods, the squirrel scurrying up the tree, the june bug that lights on your shoulder. Each has its place in this world. So do you. Discover the power of respect. Then practice it often. let it change your world. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Say how sweet it is There’s so much talk about finding that extraordinary love of our life. Maybe everything we need to know about romantic love can be learned from our friends. We don’t expect our friends to change our life and make everything that’s wrong,right. We just expect them to be who they are, and then we let them be that. It’s part of being a friend. We don’t expect to like everything about our friends. We know they have defects of character. They do things occasionally that irritate us. We don’t expect our friends to entertain and amuse us, keeping us laughing and smiling all the time. We let them go through their ups and downs. Sometimes we just sit in silence with our friends, and we each keep our thoughts to ourselves. We don’t pick fights and create drama with our friends, just to keep passion alive. Usually we do everything we can to avoid fighting with our friends. We want our friendship to be a quiet, safe, peaceful place, a haven in our lives. We don’t expect our friends to turn our lives upside down, distracting us from our path. Usually if a friend attempts to wreak havoc in our lives, we run the other way. We wouldn’t let a friend hit us. And friends don’t talk mean. If an issue comes up, we usually carefully weigh the best way to talk about this issue with her or him. We don’t expect friends to be in perfect health all the time. We know that they will have issues to deal with as they walk along their own paths. We encourage them. We pray for them. But we don’t take their issues as our own, and we don’t take it personally when they need some time to focus on their own personal growth. In friendships, one person does not hold all the power. So despite the differences in our lives, we try to relate as equals. We’re tolerant of cycles in our friendships, knowing that at different times, each person has different needs, different experiences to go through. Sometimes there’s more time and energy to devote to the friendships. Other times, there’s less. We don’t expect our friends to be at our side twenty-four hours a day. We have our time together and value that, but then we each go our own way. We don’t try to force bonding with friends, or even force the relationship to be a friendship too fast. We let ourselves go through experiences together naturally, knowing that that’s how bonding takes place. I’m not a expert on marital love, but we might have a better chance at finding love if we treated our lover like a friend. God, help me find the middle ground between unrealistic expectations and no expectations at all. Help me cherish my relationships and not confuse heavy drama with romantic love. *************************************** Conditioned Response Reactions To Life Events Our experiences color everything. The events of the past can have a profound effect on how we see our lives now and what we choose to believe about our world. Our past experiences can also influence our emotional reactions and responses to present events. Each of us reacts to stimulus based on what we have learned in life. There is no right or wrong to it; it is simply the result of past experience. Later, when our strong feelings have passed, we may be surprised at our reactions. Yet when we face a similar situation, again our reactions may be the same. When we understand those experiences, we can come that much closer to understanding our reactions and consciously change them. Between stimulus and reaction exists a fleeting moment of thought. Often, that thought is based on something that has happened to you in the past. When presented with a similar situation later on, your natural impulse is to unconsciously regard it in a similar light. For example, if you survived a traumatic automobile accident as a youngster, the first thing you might feel upon witnessing even a minor collision between vehicles may be intense panic. If you harbor unpleasant associations with death from a past experience, you may find yourself unable to think about death as a gentle release or the next step toward a new kind of existence. You can, however, minimize the intensity of your reactions by identifying the momentary thought that inspires your reaction. Then, next time, replace that thought with a more positive one. Modifying your reaction by modifying your thoughts is difficult, but it can help you to see and experience formerly unpleasant situations in a whole new light. It allows you to stop reacting unconsciously. Learning the reason of your reactions may also help you put aside a negative reaction long enough to respond in more positive and empowered ways. Your reactions and responses then become about what’s happening in the present moment rather than about the past. As time passes, your negative thoughts may lose strength, leaving only your positive thoughts to inform your healthy reactions. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Through our own experiences and the experiences of others in The Program, we see that a spiritual awakening is in reality a gift — a gift which in essence is a new state of consciousness and being. It means that I’m now on a road which really leads somewhere; it means that life is really worth living, rather than something to be endured. It means that I have been transformed in a sense that I have undergone a basic personality change — and that I possess a source of strength which I had so long denied myself. Do I believe that none come too soon to The Program — and that none return too late? Today I Pray I pray that I may attain that state of consciousness which transcends my everyday reality — but is also a part of it. May I no longer question the existence of God because I have touched His Being. For us who are recovering from addictions, the words reborn in the Spirit have a special, precious meaning. May I be wholly grateful to a Higher Power for leading me to a spiritual rebirth. Today I Will Remember Renaissance through my Higher Power. *************************************** One More Day What’s a joy to the one is a nightware to the other. That’s how it is today, that’s how it will be forever. – Bertolt Brecht Different stroke for different folks is a popular cliche, but it’s also an absolute truth which it comes to knowing people. Each of us has our own level of comfort for the activities we do and the performances we give in our lives. we also find different levels of joy in our spiritual, social, and emotional experiences. Often, we find what we’re looking for — what we wish to find — in each situation. What’s most important is that we are able to find our own level of joy — wherever we are at that time — and claim it as belonging to us. My joy may not be the same as someone Else’s joy, but I shall struggle on to keep the meaning of my joy alive. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ RISING ABOVE ~ Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail. Ralph Waldo Emerson One of the major premises of our recovery program is "progress, not perfection." No one but me expects me to be perfect. I have a history of driving myself in the quest for perfection. I've set goals that are so lofty that I could never acheive them. In that respect, I'm probably my own worst enemy. However, I can also be my own best friend. I don't have to set standards that are impossible for me to meet. In fact, we're told we need to live one day at a time. If I can do that, then I don't need to live up to my impossibly high standards. My goals aren't so out-of-reach if I can see them as daily things. What happens if I fail to meet even the "one day at a time" goal? I start over, knowing that I don't have to stay down. I can rise up and begin again. That, for me, is the greatest thing. One Day at a Time . . . I will rise above my failures and shortcomings, and know that I'm making progress. I don't have to be perfect any more. Jeff ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Our book is meant to be suggestive only. We realize we know only a little. God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. The answers will come, if your own house is in order. But obviously you cannot transmit something you haven't got. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us. - Pg. 164 - A Vision For You Hour To Hour - Book - Quote HALT. Don't get too Hungry, too Angry, too Lonely, too Tired. Why? Because any of these conditions weaken our mind and emotions and in a weakened state our disease of addiction can easily trick us into using some mind-affecting chemical. Higher Power, as I understand You, help me understand the dangers of HALT. Staying in the Game Each and every day is a rebirth into an entirely new set of possibilities. It carries with it a sense of renewal. Each and every day I will play the hand I'm dealt as well as I can play it. Each and every day I will wake up, place my hand in the hand of God and move into my day with the confidence and comfort of knowing that I am not alone, that I have access to the greatest source of compassion and power in the universe. Each and every day I will put one foot in front of the other and try to make sense of the life I have been given. I will have faith - I will stay connected and alive while I'm living. I am an active member of my life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Some program members get stuck on rules of what one can and can't say and what dependency qualifies one to be in what recovery group. They demand that newcomers follow traditions as interpreted by them. This can drive newcomers away before they even find out what recovery means. I carry the message, not the mess. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The trouble with many of us is that in trying times we stop trying. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I can handle anything that comes up today even if it is only a moment at a time. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote There are no chemical solutions to spiritual problems. - Ron K. |
December 23
Daily Reflections RECOVERY, UNITY, SERVICE Our Twelfth Step - carrying the message - is the basic service that AA's Fellowship gives; this is our principal aim and the main reason for our existence. THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 160 I thank God for those who came before me, those who told me not to forget the Three Legacies: Recovery, Unity and Service. In my home group, the Three Legacies were described on a sign which said: "You take a three-legged stool, try to balance it on only one leg, or two. Our Three Legacies must be kept intact. In Recovery, we get sober together; in Unity, we work together for the good of our Steps and Traditions; and through Service - we give away freely what has been given to us." One of the chief gifts of my life has been to know that I will have no message to give, unless I recover in unity with A.A. principles. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We have definitely left that dream world behind. It was only a sham. It was a world of our own making and it was not the real world. We are sorry for the past, yes, but we learned a lot from it. We can put it down to experience, as we see it now, because it has given us the knowledge necessary to face the world as it really is. We had to become alcoholics in order to find the A.A. program. We would not have got it any other way. In a way, it was worth it. Do I look at my past as valuable experience? Meditation For The Day Shed peace, not discord, wherever you go. Try to be part of the cure of every situation, not part of the problem. Try to ignore evil, rather than to actively combat it. Always try to build up, never to tear down. Show others by your example that happiness comes from living the right way. The power of your example is greater than the power of what you say. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may try to bring something good into every situation today. I pray that I may be constructive in the way I think and speak and act today. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Fear And Faith, p.263 The achievement of freedom from fear is a lifetime undertaking, one that can never be wholly completed. When under heavy attack, acute illness, or in other conditions of serious insecurity, we shall all react to this emotion--well or badly, as the case may be. Only the self-deceived will claim perfect freedom from fear. ******************************** We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our make-up. Sometimes we had to search persistently, but He was there. He was as much a fact as we were. We found the Great Reality deep down within us. 1. Grapevine, January 1962 2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p.55 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places AA goes the Distance Fortitude Few societies or organizations have better ways of measuring success than AA. Since we are friends as well as recovering people, some of us get to know others fairly well over long periods of time. Even in a large city, we meet people again and again, year after year. We've come to think it very commonplace that some individuals have been sober ten years or more, and that some members have been in the fellowship more than forty years. The AA program does have staying power; it goes the distance for those who continue to follow it. We should remind ourselves of this when we hear of new, faddish theories about alcoholism and recovery. Most of the time, the results reported are very short-term. What we really need is recovery with staying power, which we can find in the AA program. Today's sobriety can be another link in an endless chain of sobriety. AA will go the distance for me if I take care of each day as it comes. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple We not only need to be willing to give, but also to be open to receiving from others.---from On Hope Many of us took so much from others during our addiction that now we may not want to ask for anything. We may be afraid to ask for help, so our needs go unmet. In fact, many of us would rather give than receive. In recovery, we need to understand the difference between taking and receiving. Giving to others is important. So is receiving from others. As we grow spiritually, we learn to accept gifts. The gift of sobriety teaches us this. We need to accept the gifts the world gives us without shame. We are entitled. God loves us and will give us much if we're willing to receive it. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be receptive to Your gifts. Help me see and believe that I'm entitled to all the happiness of the world. Action for the Day: I'll think of what a friend has given me. I'll thank this friend. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning . . . The present enshrines the past. --Simone de Beauvoir Each of our lives is a multitude of interconnecting pieces, not unlike a mosaic. What has gone before, what will come today, are at once and always entwined. The past has done its part, never to be erased. The present is always a composite. In months and years gone by, perhaps we anticipated the days with dread. Fearing the worst, often we found it; we generally find that which we fear. But we can influence the mosaic our experiences create. The contribution today makes to our mosaic can lighten its shade, can heighten its contrast, and can make bold its design. What faces us today? A job we enjoy or one we fear? Growing pains of our children? Loneliness? How we move through the minutes, the hours, influences our perception of future minutes and hours. No moment is inviolate. Every moment is part of the whole that we are creating. We are artists. We create our present from influences of our past. I will go forth today; I will anticipate goodness. I will create the kind of moments that will add beauty to my mosaic. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS When he sees you know all about the drinking game, commence to describe yourself as an alcoholic. Tell him how baffled you were, how you finally learned that you were sick. Give him an account of the struggles you made to stop. Show him the mental twist which leads to the first drink of a spree. We suggest you do this as we have done it in the chapter on alcoholism. If he is alcoholic, he will understand you at once. He will match your mental inconsistencies with some of his own. pp. 91-92 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. The specifics are pretty much the same as for most alcoholics. I went places I used to swear I would never go. I did things I could not imagine myself doing. I hung out with people that at one time I would cross the street to avoid. There came a time when, looking into the mirror, I honestly did not know just who was looking back at me. To say that I had arrived at a "jumping-off point" is an understatement. Life just could not go on like this much longer. pp. 487-488 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." As we made spiritual progress, we saw through these fallacies. It became clear that if we ever were to feel emotionally secure among grown-up people, we would have to put our lives on a give-and-take basis; we would have to develop the sense of being in partnership or brotherhood with all those around us. We saw that we would need to give constantly of ourselves without demands for repayment. When we persistently did this we gradually found that people were attracted to us as never before. And even if they failed us, we could be understanding and not too seriously affected. pp. 115-116 ************************************************** ********* "The tree in which the sap is stagnant remains fruitless." --Hosea Ballou Speaking without thinking is shooting without aiming. --French Proverb Don't let your tongue cut your throat. --Irish Proverb As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way. --Ralph Waldo Emerson When you find you are upset over a situation, stop and ask yourself one very important question. "Is this something I can change?" Whether it is or not, turn your negative energy in to productive energy. You can either change the situation, or change your perspective of the situation. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation LANGUAGE "If thought corrupts language, language can also corrupt thought." -- George Orwell Sobriety for me means much more than "not drinking" or "not using" --- it means the daily decision to be a positive and creative human being in all areas of my life: How I treat people. What I eat. The books I read and how I speak! Not even my worst enemy would call me a "prude" but I think that bad language used on a regular basis is unacceptable in sobriety. Why? Because it hurts the listener and does not show respect for self or the God-given gift of communication. If you have no respect for language, you will ultimately not grow as a spiritual person. May Your "words of love" be reflected in my speech and writings. ************************************************** ********* To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul; in you I trust, O my God. Do not let me be put to shame, nor let my enemies triumph over me. Psalms 25:1-2 Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. Psalms 25:4-5 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Each time you have a kind thought, say a kind word or do a kind deed you are living your love. Lord, as I see the world through loving eyes, I experience heaven on earth. Get and keep a good humored attitude toward life. This will bring you support rather than opposition. Lord, may I always be a peacemaker. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today New Ideas "We reevaluate our ideas so we can become acquainted with the new ideas that lead to a new way of life." Basic Text, pg. 91 Learning to live a new way of life can be difficult. Sometimes, when the going gets especially hard, we're tempted to follow the path of least resistance and live by our old ideas again. We forget that our old ideas were killing us. To live a new way of life, we need to open our minds to new ideas. Working the steps, attending meetings, sharing with others, trusting a sponsor - these suggestions may meet our resistance, even our rebellion. The NA program requires effort, but each step in the program brings us closer to becoming the kinds of people we truly want to be. We want to change, to grow to become something more than we are today. To do that, we open our mind, try on the new ideas we've found in NA, and learn to live a new way of life. Just for today: I will open my mind to new ideas and learn to live my life in a new way. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. There are no riches above a sound body, and no joy above the joy of the heart. --Anonymous Holidays are a wonderful and exciting time of year--a time to enjoy snowflakes falling, company coming, and presents. Sometimes we find ourselves concentrating solely on the wrapped presents and forgetting about the presents of the heart. With God's help, we can begin to notice such things as the hug from a brother or sister, the laugh of a grandparent or the hand-drawn card given to us by a friend. All of these wonderful presents and more are ours for the taking; we need only to see beyond the wrapped packages. It is then we will fully experience the joys of the heart. How many gifts do I see around me right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Loneliness is the way by which destiny endeavors to lead man to himself. --Hermann Hissed We have an epidemic of loneliness among men in our world. Everywhere, men are walking around as though in plastic bubbles that prevent contact with others. We are cut off from closeness with our brothers and sisters, our own children, our mates, coworkers, and neighbors. We have learned to play the role, be efficient, and look good. Do we dare let others know how we feel? Will they look down on us? Will they think we're strange? All this has made us ripe for the diseases of addiction and codependency. Some of us have romanticized the pain of loneliness and glorified it. We sought some comfort for our pain, but we only perpetuated it. Breaking through the barrier to let someone know us can be incredibly difficult. Yet, just to say "I feel lonely" to another person makes us slightly less alone. Going to meetings and working this program provide a way out. The greatest benefits of the program for many of us have been recovery from loneliness and the genuine relationships we have developed. Today, I will reveal some of my feelings to another person. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. . . . The present enshrines the past. --Simone de Beauvoir Each of our lives is a multitude of interconnecting pieces, not unlike a mosaic. What has gone before, what will come today, are at once and always entwined. The past has done its part, never to be erased. The present is always a composite. In months and years gone by, perhaps we anticipated the days with dread. Fearing the worst, often we found it; we generally find that which we fear. But we can influence the mosaic our experiences create. The contribution today makes to our mosaic can lighten its shade, can heighten its contrast, and can make bold its design. What faces us today? A job we enjoy or one we fear? Growing pains of our children? Loneliness? How we move through the minutes, the hours, influences our perception of future minutes and hours. No moment is inviolate. Every moment is part of the whole that we are creating. We are artists. We create our present from influences of our past. I will go forth today; I will anticipate goodness. I will create the kind of moments that will add beauty to my mosaic. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Holiday Triggers One year, when I was a child, my father got drunk and violent at Christmas. I had just unwrapped a present, a bottle of hand lotion, when he exploded in an alcoholic rage. Our Christmas was disrupted. It was terrible. It was frightening for the whole family. Now, thirty-five years later, whenever I smell hand lotion, I immediately feel all the feelings I did that Christmas: the fear, the disappointment, the heartache, the helplessness, and an instinctive desire to control. --Anonymous There are many positive triggers that remind us of Christmas: snow, decorations, "Silent Night," "Jingle Bells," wrapped packages, a nativity scene, stockings hung on a fireplace. These "triggers" can evoke in us the warm, nostalgic feelings of the Christmas celebration. There are other kinds of triggers, though, that may be less apparent and evoke different feelings and memories. Our mind is like a powerful computer. It links sight, sound, smell, touch, and taste with feelings, thoughts, and memories. It links our senses - and we remember. Sometimes the smallest, most innocuous incident can trigger memories. Not all our memories are pleasant, especially if we grew up in an alcoholic, dysfunctional setting. We may not understand why we suddenly feel afraid, depressed, and anxious. We may not understand what has triggered our codependent coping behaviors - the low self worth, the need to control, the need to neglect ourselves. When that happens, we need to understand that some innocuous event may be triggering memories recorded deep within us. If something, even something we don't understand, triggers painful memories, we can pull ourselves back into the present by self care: acknowledging our feelings, detaching, working the Steps, and affirming ourselves. We can take action to feel good. We can help ourselves feel better each Christmas. No matter what the past held, we can put it in perspective, and create a more pleasant holiday today. Today, I will gently work through my memories of this holiday season. I will accept my feelings, even if I consider them different than what others are feeling this holiday. God, help me let go, heal from, and release the painful memories surrounding the holidays. Help me finish my business from the past, so I can create the holiday of my choice. As I start this day with quiet meditation, I feel myself becoming still and at peace. At anytime during the day I can bring my mind back to this moment. I can bring my attention and awareness back to the peace that I have when I am with my breath and I know that my breath is with me at all times, whether I remember it or not. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Bring Your Healing Gifts to Others Let your healing gifts to the world spring naturally from who you really are. You want to be a healer. You want to be a force for good in this world. Many of us believe deeply in healing, service, and love. But until you know what heals and helps you, what the truth is for you, you won’t know what heals and helps others. True service, healing that touches the hearts and souls of men and women, doesn’t happen when we ignore who we are. It doesn’t happen when we try to be who we think we should be or when we pretend, out of fear, that we’re someone we’re not. The ability to bring healing to others can only come when we genuinely accept and love ourselves, past and present, and are vulnerable enough to be honest about what heals and helps us. When we love and accept ourselves, we will love and accept others. And only from that place of acceptance can true healing spring. Love yourself. Accept yourself. Be honest about what heals and helps you. Then you’ll bring your healing gifts to others. Your life will be a gift to the world. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go How sweet and precious the moments It had seemed like such an ordinary time. He was staying at the house, helping me out. I had funeral arrangements to make and to attend. My mother was coming into town. I had a lot to do. Then the busy days and nights settled into the quiet rhythm of California winters– short days, fires in the fireplace at night, a pot of spagetti sauce on the stove. January at the beach was a time to stay in the house and be quiet and cozy. Sometimes he cooked a wonderful dinner– Philly steak sandwhiches with real melted cream cheese. Other times, we ordered pizza and just ate in. Sometimes I read. Other times I talked on the phone or puttered around the house. At night, right before sleep came, bringing a gentle end to another day, he put a Sarah McLaughlin CD on the stereo. She sang about being in the arms of angels as she gently sang me to sleep. Then the day came. He was ready to leave. Our time together was done. So be it, I thought. What comes around doesn’t come to stay. It always comes to pass. As he walked out the door, I waved good-bye. Then a wave of emotions rushed through me, flooding my heart. It had seemed like such an ordinary time. And it was. But until it was over, until he walked out that door, I didn’t know how rich and beautiful the ordinary was. “Hmm,” I thought, watching him leave. Maybe the time hasn’t passed yet. How sweet and precious are the moments of our lives, especially the ordinary ones. Don’t let them pass unnoticed or unexperienced. Those ordinary moments can easily become the richest part of our lives. God, help me remember that the way to live a life filled with wonder and awe is to surrender to and live each moment fully, expecting and allowing each one to simply be what it is. *************************************** Five Actions Panchakarma "Panchakarma," a sanskrit word meaning "five actions," describes a series of gentle, natural therapies that boost the body’s ability to detoxify and rejuvenate. As an essential part of Ayurveda, India’s ancient holistic system of medicine, it is used to maintain the body’s balance to prevent illness or as the first step in holistic treatment. Panchakarma’s incredible purification improves healing throughout the body, mind, and spirit, clearing the way for the body’s healing intelligence to flow freely. Today, an oil massage, steam baths, and a special diet prepare your body for several days of relaxing, healing therapies at a spa-like medical clinic. A precise sequence of soothing treatments is then applied in such a way that brainwaves are stimulated and synchronized, creating deep relaxation and an expanded state of consciousness. At the same time, herbal therapies help flush toxins from the body’s systems and tissues while massage soothes the body and balances its energy. Profoundly rejuvenating, Panchakarma can increase energy and mental clarity. It has even been known to slow the aging process and heal diseases previously thought to be incurable according to Western medicine. Depending on the needs of the particular individual, a series of five basic therapies are used: Vaman purges toxins from the sinuses, lungs, and stomach; Virechan flushes toxins from the small intestine; Vasti removes toxins from the colon; Nasyam is herbal therapy applied through the nose for head and sinus conditions. The fifth therapy can be one of three methods: Rakta Moksham removes the excess toxins in the bloodstream, while Shiro Dhara uses a hot-oil head massage. A second form of Vasti can also be applied. Along with a relief of symptoms and improvements in physical disorders, many people, after experiencing Panchakarma, feel lighter, more energized, and look younger. The body’s ability to heal itself is deeply enhanced with the techniques of Panchakarma. By embracing its methods, we eliminate obstacles to complete balance in our bodies and allow the powerful flow of our healing energy to restore our health, our natural glow, and our zest for life. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day How can I tell if I have had a spiritual awakening? For many of us in The Program, a spiritual awakening manifest itself in simple rather than complicated evidences: emotional maturity; an end to constant and soul churning resentments; the ability to love and be loved in return; the belief, even without understanding, that something lets the sun rise and set, brings forth and ends life, and gives joy to human hearts. Am I now able to do, feel and believe that which I could not previously do through my own unaided strength and resources alone? Today I Pray May my spiritual confidence begin to spread over my attitudes towards others — especially during holiday times, when anticipations and anxieties are high. As an addictive person, I have not handled holidays well — greeting those who gather at home, missing those who are not here. I pray for serenity to cope with the holiday brew of emotions. Today I Will Remember Spirit without “spirits.” Cheer without “cheer.” *************************************** One More Day It is a great piece of skill to know how to guide your luck even while waiting for it. – Balstar Gracian Manipulation sounds like such a harsh word, but consider the hands of a surgeon, the moves of an artist, the skill of an electrician. They manipulate their physical environment. In doing so, they are creating. In some subtle way — perhaps we are not even aware that we are doing it — we learn to manipulate our lives. We, too, are very creative. Some people are able to reach for positive goals, even during seemingly negative times. These people are capable of scooping out the very best of life. Those are the ones who have learned to delicate art of helping themselves. They can create their own luck. Sometimes luck isn’t always caused by a draw of the cards. I work hard in all areas to improve my lot, to improve my relationships, to improve my life. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ FEAR ~ When thinking won't cure fear, action will. W. Clement Stone When I first came into the program, I was told that I couldn't think my way into positive actions, but I could act my way into positive thinking. I learned that this was a simple program of action; that if I wanted what you had, I had to do what you did. None of these clichés made any sense to me; I would have to think these over. The nerve of these people telling me that they would do my thinking for me, that all I had to do was follow directions! They prodded and badgered me into working the Steps out of real love and knowledge of truth. I realize now that my actions demonstrated to God my desire to change, and He gave me the courage to try living another way. Most importantly, though, He gave me you. One Day at a Time . . . Am I going to "keep on the firing line" or rest on my laurels? Jeremiah ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We have seen the truth demonstrated again and again: 'Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.' Commencing to drink after a period of sobriety, we are in a short time as bad as ever. If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol. - Pg. 33 - More About Alcholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The first few 24 hours are the hardest task we will ever have to complete. The cravings are intensive, the Babbler put-downs are overwhelming, our bodies feel like a dirty sneaker. Sometimes we simply have to hold on. God, as I understand You, be with me now. Always Here Today I recover the spirit that has always been there, vibrating just beneath the surface of my being, the membrane of my life. I am whole and in tact. I call to that part of me that has been waiting patiently for me to come to my senses and claim it. That part of me that is eternal, that never dies. Spirit has been with me even in my darkest hours. I turn and look, I quiet my mind and see, I rest in awareness and experience. Spirit has never been far, but I have been asleep. Today I wake up to spirit. I am alive to life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote There is nothing about you that was not intended to be. You have an incredibly sacred purpose. I am on purpose. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you don't remember what God did for you yesterday, you'll have trouble trusting Him for today. Time for Joy - Book - Quote As I start this day with quiet meditation, I feel myself becoming still and at peace. At anytime during the day I can bring my mind back to this moment. I can bring my attention and awareness back to the peace that I have when I am with my breath and I know that my breath is with me at all times, whether I remember it or not. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote If I point the finger at anyone, I have three pointing right back at me. - Unknown origin. |
December 24
Daily Reflections A "SANE AND HAPPY USEFULNESS" We have come to believe He would like us to keep our heads in the clouds with Him, but that our feet ought to be firmly planted on earth. That is where our fellow travelers are, and that is where our work must be done. These are the realities for us. We have found nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 130 All the prayer and meditation in the world will not help me unless they are accompanied by action. Practicing the principles in all my affairs shows me the care that God takes in all parts of my life. God appears in my world when I move aside, and allow Him to step into it. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We have been given a new life, just because we happened to become alcoholics. We certainly don't deserve the new life that has been given us. There is little in our past to warrant the life we have now. Many people live good lives from their youth on, not getting into serious trouble, being well adjusted to life, and yet they have not found all that we drunks have found. We had the good fortune to find Alcoholics Anonymous and with it a new life. We are among the lucky few in the world who have learned a new way of life. Am I deeply grateful for the new life that I have learned in A.A.? Meditation For The Day A deep gratitude to the Higher Power for all the blessings which we have and which we don't deserve has come to us. We thank God and mean it. Then comes service to our fellow men, out of gratitude for what we have received. This entails some sacrifice of ourselves and our own affairs. But we are glad to do it. Gratitude, service, and then sacrifice are the steps that lead to good A.A. work. They open the door to a new life for us. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may gladly serve others, out of deep gratitude for what I have received. I pray that I may keep a deep sense of obligation. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Individual Responsibilities, p.262 Let us emphasize that our reluctance to fight one another, or anybody else, is not counted as some special virtue which entitles us A.A.'s to feel superior to other people. Nor does this reluctance mean that the members of A.A. are going to back away from their individual responsibilities as citizens. Here they should feel free to act as they see the right upon the public issues of our times. But when it comes to A.A. as a whole, that's quite a different matter. As a group we do not enter into public controversy, because we are sure that our Society will perish if we do. 12 & 12, p.177 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Jealousy toward loved ones Feeling Though resentment gets more attention in AA than jealousy, both of these ugly emotions can plague us in sobriety. Some of us can be very distressed and ashamed when the green demon of jealousy suddenly assaults us. Does this mean we're not working our program? No, because the purpose of our program is to bring honesty and healing into our lives, not denial of basic human emotions. It's very understandable that we have pangs of jealousy even in sobriety. Quite often, this jealousy will be felt toward loved ones and close friends. One young AA father disclosed he was jealous of his wife when their infant son seemed more responsive to her than to him. We can also experience jealousy when others close to us receive things we'd like to have. It's even possible to be jealous of another's standing in AA. When such feelings arise, we always have the answer: We must discuss our feelings with certain AA friends and turn these problems over to our Higher Power. This, not denial, is always the solution. If the green demon of envy and jealousy arises today, I'll let the healing power of the Twelve Steps go to work on it. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple We must all hang together or we will hang separately.---Ben Franklin We didn't get ourselves sober. And we don't keep ourselves sober. Our program does this. That is why the Twelfth Step is important. We must be willing to give service to our program whenever it's needed. When a friend calls and say he or she feels like using, we don't say we're sorry. We get our friend and take him or her to a meeting. Our survival depends on this kind of action. We are to carry the message. We carry the message by deeds, not words. We are part of a fellowship based on action. A fellowship guided by love. It is not words that keep us sober--it is action. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be ready whenever there's a need. Help me be ready to put my self-will aside. Give me strength. Action for the Day: I will think of my group members. Who could use a supportive call or visit? I will call or visit those who need my help. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Follow your dream . . if you stumble, don't stop and lose sight of your goal, press on to the top. For only on top Can we see the whole view . . . --Amanda Bradley Today, we can, each of us, look back on our lives and get a glimmering of why something happened and how it fit into the larger mosaic of our lives. And this will continue to be true for us. We have stumbled. We will stumble. And we learn about ourselves, about what makes us stumble and about the methods of picking ourselves up. Life is a process, a learning process that needs those stumbles to increase our awareness of the steps we need to take to find our dream at the top. None of us could realize the part our stumbling played in the past. But now we see. When we fall, we need to trust that, as before, our falls are "up," not down. I will see the whole view in time. I see part of it daily. My mosaic is right and good and needs my stumbles. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS If you are satisfied that he is a real alcoholic, begin to dwell on the hopeless feature of the malady. Show him, from your own experience, how the queer mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power. Don’t, at this stage, refer to this book, unless he has seen it and wishes to discuss it. And be careful not to brand him as an alcoholic. Let him draw his own conclusion. If he sticks to the idea that he can still control his drinking, tell him that possibly he can—if he is not too alcoholic. But insist that if he is severely afflicted, there may be little chance he can recover by himself. p. 92 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. I began the process of speeding up the day when life would end. My doctor has six or seven suicide attempts on my medical records. Most were pitiful efforts to reach out for help, although I didn't see it at the time. My last such attempt was very public and demonstrated that I had lost touch with reality and with any sense of what my actions could do to others. p. 488 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." When we developed still more, we discovered the best possible source of emotional stability to be God Himself. We found that dependence upon His perfect justice, forgiveness, and love was healthy, and that it would work where nothing else would. If we really depended upon God, we couldn't very well play God to our fellows nor would we feel the urge wholly to rely on human protection and care. These were the new attitudes that finally brought many of us an inner strength and peace that could not be deeply shaken by the shortcomings of others or by any calamity not of our own making. p. 116 ************************************************** ********* Sharing our experiences with other people gives them hope. --unknown What I am is God's gift to me. What I make of myself is my gift to Him. --unknown "An apology is the superglue of life: it can repair just about anything." --Unknown A man's true wealth is the good he does in the world. Beauty is eternity gazing at itself in a mirror. But you are eternity and you are the mirror. --Kahlil Gibran "Joy is not in things; It is in us" --Richard Wagner "Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect." --Oren Arnold "At this time of the year, we need to remind ourselves that what we give from deep within has a much greater worth than what we give from our wallets. Some attempt to impress others with their contributions, but the real acts of kindness are when we give our time, our talents, and gifts that are a reflection of our hearts. -*Neil Eskelinn ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation BROTHERHOOD "I am a citizen, not of Athens or Greece, but of the world." -- Socrates My recovery has enabled me to see that I belong; I belong not simply to a race or nation but to the world. The freedom experienced in my recovery enables me to embrace different cultures, races and religions. Spirituality has brought harmony into my life. Today I can go where I please. I can learn languages and communicate with people in foreign lands. I can listen to ideas and philosophies that enrich God "as I understand Him". The healing that I have experienced in my recovery is more than discovering my choice around alcohol, it is discovering my choice around life. Today I am not content to exist in my life, I choose to live it. Welcome to my world! May I always choose to see and appreciate the richness of my life. ************************************************** ********* He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way. All the ways of the LORD are loving and faithful for those who keep the demands of his covenant. Psalm 25 9-10 "Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration As you draw closer and closer to God, you won't have to tell anyone because it will show in your face. Lord, teach me Your ways as I am ready and let Your love and peace flow through me even in my difficult moments. When you live in the spirit of God you will always feel the love within you. Lord, may I seek peace in You and not from the outside world. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Group "The Twelfth Step of our personal program also says that we carry the message to the addict who still suffers.... The group is the most powerful vehicle we have for carrying the message." Basic Text pg. 65 When we first come to Narcotics Anonymous meetings, we meet recovering addicts. We know they are addicts because they talk about the same experiences and feelings we've had. We know they are recovering because of their serenity - they've got something we want. We feel hope when other addicts share their recovery with us in NA meetings. The atmosphere of recovery attracts us to the meetings. That atmosphere is created when group members make a commitment to work together. We try to enhance the atmosphere of recovery by helping set up for meetings, greeting newcomers, and talking with other addicts after the meeting. These demonstrations of our commitment make our meetings attractive and help our groups share their recovery. Sharing experience in meetings is one way in which we help one another, and it's often the foundation for our sense of belonging. We identify with other addicts, so we trust their message of hope. Many of us would not have stayed in Narcotics Anonymous without that sense of belonging and hope. When we share at group meetings, we support our personal recovery while helping others. Just for today: I will reach out to another addict in my group and share my recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. He is Father. Even more, God is Mother, who does not want to harm us. --Pope John Paul I God is many things to different people. Some call God "Father," others "Mother," still others "Higher Power," "Inner Light," "Deeper Self," and "Supreme Being." It doesn't matter what name we use. No one name is ever fully adequate, and each of us has our own private way of trying to understand that which we can't ever understand fully. We give God names which attempt to express what God means to us personally, what God does for us as individuals, and how we see ourselves in relation to God. Could it also be true that other people can't be labelled and put into one box? Doing so limits them to one particular way of being understood, and it limits the ways we can get to know them. If we are all made in God's image, then we all deserve the freedom to be seen differently by different people. How does God look to me today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Celebration is a forgetting in order to remember. A forgetting of ego, of problems, of difficulties. A letting go. --Matthew Fox A holiday presents us men with an opportunity to practice the letting go of this program. This is a special day to set aside our work and our routines, to put our problems and burdens on the shelf. Let us join with others who are also letting go on this day and celebrate. Maybe we can learn from them how they do it. We may have been too compulsive on past holidays to celebrate. Or perhaps our holidays are clouded with painful memories. We might miss loved ones or we may recall disappointments or the chaos of earlier holidays. There is no need for perfection in our celebration. We can have some tension, or pain, and yet set it aside as we join with others for a special day. Today, I will set my ego aside and let go of the usual things in my life in order to reach out to others and participate in celebration. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Follow your dream . . if you stumble, don't stop and lose sight of your goal, press on to the top. For only on top Can we see the whole view . . . --Amanda Bradley Today, we can, each of us, look back on our lives and get a glimmering of why something happened and how it fit into the larger mosaic of our lives. And this will continue to be true for us. We have stumbled. We will stumble. And we learn about ourselves, about what makes us stumble and about the methods of picking ourselves up. Life is a process, a learning process that needs those stumbles to increase our awareness of the steps we need to take to find our dream at the top. None of us could realize the part our stumbling played in the past. But now we see. When we fall, we need to trust that, as before, our falls are "up," not down. I will see the whole view in time. I see part of it daily. My mosaic is right and good and needs my stumbles. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Getting Through the Holidays For some, the sights, signs, and smells of the holidays bring joy and a warm feeling. But, while others are joyously diving into the season, some of us are dipping into conflict, guilt, and a sense of loss. We read articles on how to enjoy the holidays, we read about the Christmas blues, but many of us still can't figure out how to get through the holiday season. We may not know what a joyous holiday would look and feel like. Many of us are torn between what we want to do on the holiday, and what we feel we have to do. We may feel guilty because we don't want to be with our families. We may feel a sense of loss because we don't have the kind of family to be with that we want. Many of us, year after year, walk into the same dining room on the same holiday, expecting this year to be different. Then we leave, year after year, feeling let down, disappointed, and confused by it all. Many of us have old, painful memories triggered by the holidays. Many of us feel a great deal of relief when the holiday is ended. One of the greatest gifts of recovery is learning that we are not alone. There are probably as many of us in conflict during the holidays than there are those who feel at peace. We're learning, through trial and error, how to take care of ourselves a little better each holiday season. Our first recovery task during the holidays is to accept ourselves, our situation, and our feelings about our situation. We accept our guilt, anger, and sense of loss. It's all okay. There is no right or perfect way to handle the holidays. Our strength can be found in doing the best we can, one year at a time. This holiday season, I will give myself permission to take care of myself. Today I am willing to be increasingly aware of my spiritual life. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Heal Yourself Infuse healing energy into yourself, into your being. For too long, we’ve been attracted to things that drain us, exhausting our body, depleting our soul. That time has passed. The world is a spa, a nature retreat, a wealth of healing resources. Pour epsom salts and essential oils into your bath. Sit quietly by a tree or in a garden. Walk around the block in your neighborhood. Spend an afternoon in a nearby park or a day at the lake or beach. Throw stones into the river while you sit on the bank contemplating the eternal stream of life. Allow beautiful music to quietly imbue the stillness with healing instead of the pounding of your mind. Light a fire and awaken that darkened hearth to glowing flames and soothing warmth. Rise from your bed early in the morning. Open the curtains. Watch the sunrise. Feel the sunrise. Let it infuse you with its message. Let it energize you, invigorate you, fill you with life. At day’s end return to the window. Or step outside. Watch the sun set. Absorb its changing colors spreading beyond the horizon. Feel how it changes the earth and all it touches. Pet a puppy, stroke a piece of velvet, listen to a symphony. If you can’t slow down long enough to absorb the energy the first time, do it a second and a third. Absorb revitalizing energy until you can hear your voice, hear your heart tell you what would feel good, what would bring peace, what would bring stillness and joy. Before long, doing what brings healing and joy will become as natural as it used to be to do what drains, tires, depletes, and exhausts. It isn’t enough to draw near to the light. Absorb it into you. Let it charge you and change you with its energy and its power. Healing is all around you. Wherever you are, whatever your resources, healing energy, and joy are there. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Let your family be Timothy attended one of those seminars, the kind that talks about personal growth and encourages people to open their hearts. After the seminar, he was so moved by what he’d heard that he called his father on the phone. He hadn’t talked to his father for many years. They had a squabble years earlier when Timothy left home. Neither one wanted tp make the first move or to forgive the other person for the harsh words that had transpired. Timothy made the first move. He and his father have been close ever since. Jessica had her share of troubled times with her mother,too. Over the years there had been times when they’d been close, times when they didn’t talk, and times when Jessica just did the minimum in the relationship, mostly out of a sense of obligation and guilt. As Jessica got older, she began feeling bad about her troubled relationship with her mother. She’d done her family of origin work. She knew her mother had been troubled; but after all, her mother was just a person. Why not forgive and forget? Jessica planned a big trip for the two of them to take, a mother-daughter vacation that would melt away the irritation and conflict from all the years. Jessica had so many hopes the day she met her mother at the airport. But when they got together in the same room for their two weeks of joy, Jessica realized she felt the same way she always had when she was around her mother: irritable, ashamed, and not good enough. Clarence liked his dad when he was a boy. But the older he got, the more he wanted to leave home. His father had issues; Clarence did, too. After Clarence left home, he only spent a few minutes each year talking to his father. One day, when Clarence reached his thirties, he decided it was time for him and his father to be friends. He planned a trip to his father’s house. He couldn’t wait for the heart-to-heart talk they’d have. Clarence would talk about the struggles of being a man and growing up, and surely his father would identify with him. But when they got together, alone in the house, after Clarence poured out his heart, all his father had to say was, “Can you come outside and help me change the tire on the car?” Families and parents come in all different kinds. Do your family of origin work. Be grateful for the good passed on to you from your ancestors and your heritage. Reach out, if that’s what your heart leads you to do. Be the best son or daughter you can, whatever that means to you. But don’t torture yourself if your relationship with your parents is not what you dreamed. Let each member of your family be who he or she is. Love them as much as you can. But if you never got along all that well before, you might not get along now, even after you open your heart. Laugh. Smile. You don’t have to react. You know how to take care of yourself. God, heal my heart toward all my family members. Help me accept each person for who he or she is. Then help me genuinely accept myself,too. *************************************** Beyond Counting Blessings Being Truly Thankful by Madisyn Taylor Our gratitude deepens when we begin to be thankful for being alive during this time and living the life we are living. Often when we practice being thankful, we go through the process of counting our blessings, acknowledging the wonderful people, things and places that make up our reality. While it is fine to be grateful for the good fortune we have accumulated, true thankfulness stems from a powerful comprehension of the gift of simply being alive, and when we feel it, we feel it regardless of our circumstances. In this deep state of gratitude, we recognize the purity of the experience of being, in and of itself, and our thankfulness is part and parcel of our awareness that we are one with this great mystery that is life. It is difficult for most of us to access this level of consciousness as we are very caught up in the ups and downs of our individual experiences in the world. The thing to remember about the world, though, is that it ebbs and flows, expands and contracts, gives and takes, and is by its very nature somewhat unreliable. If we only feel gratitude when it serves our desires, this is not true thankfulness. No one is exempt from the twists and turns of fate, which may, at any time, take the possessions, situations, and people we love away from us. Ironically, it is sometimes this kind of loss that awakens us to a thankfulness that goes deeper than just being grateful when things go our way. Illness and near-miss accidents can also serve as wake-up calls to the deeper realization that we are truly lucky to be alive. We do not have to wait to be shaken to experience this state of being truly thankful for our lives. Tuning in to our breath and making an effort to be fully present for a set period of time each day can do wonders for our ability to connect with true gratitude. We can also awaken ourselves with the intention to be more aware of the unconditional generosity of the life force that flows through us regardless of our circumstances. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day We came to The Program as supplicants, literally at the ends of our ropes. Sooner or later, by practicing the principles of the Twelve Steps, we discover within ourselves a very precious thing. We uncover something with which we can be comfortable in all places and situations. We gain strength and grow with the help of God as we understand Him, with the fellowship of The Program, and by applying the Twelve Steps to our lives. Can anyone take my new life from me? Today I Pray May my prayers of desperate supplication, which I brought to my Higher Power as a newcomer to The Program, change to a peaceful surrender to the will of God. Now that I have seen what can be done through the endless might of a Higher Power, may my gift to others be that strong conviction. I pray that those I love will have the faith to find their own spiritual experiences and the blessings of peace. Today I Will Remember Peace — inner and outer — is God’s greatest blessing. *************************************** One More Day I have been sick and I have found out, only then, how lonely I am. Is it too late? – Eudora Welty At one time, we may have thought in absolute terms. Either a person was our best friend or not. Things were right or wrong. We may have driven people from us — people we could have loved and who would have enriched our lives. We have learned that if we are not happy, we need not accept things as they stand. The first step is always to admit there is a problem. Whether it’s loneliness, or we have been too brusque with others, or we need a spiritual change, we can admit it and do whatever is necessary to improve. We can turn to friends or even professionals for help if we need it. We can do this because it’s never too late. Although the very thought of change is frightening, I will assess my life and begin anew today. ***************************************** One Day At A Time REGRET “Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can't build on it; it’s only good for wallowing in.” Katherine Mansfield Before I came into the program, I allowed fear to rule my life and prevent me from trying new things. I was absent from my own life. I was emotionally unavailable to my children and I stayed stuck in a deep hole of self-pity. I never really heard beautiful music or gloried in the miracles of nature. Although I had what people might perceive as a pretty normal life, it was actually an empty shell and I merely existed. I feel so saddened now at the thought of all the wasted years. I cannot bring them back, but I can learn from them. When I came into the program and read the Promises in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, I realized that it was futile to regret the past or to shut the door on it. Those years and all the pain I went through are what made me the person I am today. I need to always remember where I came from, because if I don't, I can just as easily go back there. I can also use my experience to help others on this wonderful road to recovery. I am able to give away what has been given to me so freely, because it’s only then that I can keep what I have. One Day at a Time . . . I must always remember where I came from so that I can help others in this program of recovery and keep myself from going back into the patterns of my past. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks - drinks which they see others taking with impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is little hope of his recovery. - Pg. xxviii-xxix - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion Hour To Hour - Book - Quote In our recovery it is easy to forget to listen. We get two weeks of clean time and suddenly 'got it made.' Listening is actually our second greatest teacher, the horrors of addiction being our first. If we forget to listen to those who have gone before us, our first great teacher will take over again. May I please keep my ears open, more then my mouth during these initial learning months. Inner Hearing, Inner Sight Today, I will trust my own heart. The clear message that whispers within me has more to tell me than a thousand voices. I have a guide within me who knows what is best for me. There is a part of me that sees the whole picture and knows how it all fits together. My inner voice may come in the form of a strong sense, a pull from within, a gut feeling or a quiet knowing. However my inner voice comes to me, I will learn to pay attention. In my heart I know what is going on. Though I am conditioned by the world to look constantly outside myself for meaning, today I recognize that it is deeply important for me to hear what I am saying from within. I give myself the gift of listening. I will trust my inner voice. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When we feel that fate has dealt us a bad hand with chemical dependency, we simply remember that many people have MS, cancer, diabetes, lupus, or a myriad of maladies that are not so easily put into remission. Because I count my blessings, my blessings count. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Be kind to unkind people. It gets to them. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am willing to be increasingly aware of my spiritual life. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote This guy had been dragged out of his car drunk by the police. He was handcuffed and chained to a bench at the police station, he'd just urinated on himself, and he looked up at the cop and said; 'I have got to stop driving.' - Scott R. |
December 25
Daily Reflections AT PEACE WITH LIFE Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities. "How can I best serve Thee - Thy will (not mine) be done." ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 85 I read this passage each morning, to start off my day, because it is a continual reminder to "practice these principles in all my affairs." When I keep God's will at the forefront of my mind, I am able to do what I should be doing, and that puts me at peace with life, with myself and with God. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Many alcoholics will be saying today: "This is a good Christmas for me." They will be looking back over the past Christmases which were not like this one. They will be thanking God for their sobriety and their new found life. They will be thinking about how their lives have changed when they came into A.A. They will be thinking that perhaps God let them live through all the hazards of their drinking careers, when they were perhaps often close to death, in order that they may be used by Him in the great work of A.A. Is this a happy Christmas for me? Meditation For The Day The kingdom of heaven is also for the lowly, the sinners, the repentant. "And they presented unto him gifts--gold, frankincense, and myrrh." Bring your gifts of gold--your money and material possessions. Bring your frankincense--the consecration of your life to a worthy cause. Bring your myrrh--your sympathy and understanding and help. Lay them all at the feet of God and let Him have full use of them. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be truly thankful on this Christmas day. I pray that I may bring my gifts and lay them on the altar. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It "Fearless and Searching", p.261 My self-analysis has frequently been faulty. Sometimes I've failed to share my defects with the right people; at other times, I've confessed their defects, rather than my own; and still other times, my confession of defects has been more in the nature of loud complaints about my circumstances and my problems. ******************************** When A.A. suggests a fearless moral inventory, it must seem to every newcomer that more is being asked of him than he can do. Every time he tries to look within himself, Pride says, "You need not pass this way," and Fear says, "You dare not look!" But pride and fear of this sort turn out to be bogymen, nothing else. Once we have a complete willingness to take inventory, and exert ourselves to do the job thoroughly, a wonderful light falls upon this foggy scene. As we persist, a brand-new kind of confidence is born, and the sense of relief at finally facing ourselves is indescribable. 1. Grapevine, June 1958 2. 12 & 12, pp.49-50 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Liking Ourselves Self-esteem. It's maybe unsettling to learn that we need to like ourselves more, especially when we've often been accused of being conceited. Being conceited does not mean liking oneself; it's really a matter of being smug and contemptuous in our dealing with others. This attitude is easily recognized by others, and it causes them to dislike us. However, if we like ourselves in the right way, others sense this too, and they will be drawn to us. We will truly like ourselves more as we learn to practice the principles of AA. We will like the kind of life we are trying to live. We will like ourselves for practicing fairness and honesty. We will also like ourselves for letting people see us as we are and feel comfortable doing so. In liking ourselves, we feel no need to impress or dazzle others. I'll remember today that I have a right to be in the world. I will do my best to be fair toward others, but I will like myself regardless of their reactions. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple To love is to place our happiness in the happiness of another.--Gottfried Wilhelm von Leibnitz. Not that we're getting well. We feel the need for love more than ever. We tried to avoid love by using chemicals to feel good. But it didn't work. Addiction cut us off even more from people. How do we fill our needs for love? We can think about this fact: People give us love all the time. Only we just haven't seen it. Every time someone comes to a meeting to get well with us, that is love. Love isn't all-or-nothing. Little gems of love are all over. Watch them. Enjoy them. Give them to others. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, love comes from You. Help me see it, and give it. Action for the Day: I'll look three persons in the eye today and send them love in my smile. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning What we suffer, what we endure . . is done by us, as individuals, in private. --Louise Bogan Empathy we can give. Empathy we can find, and it comforts. But our pain, the depth of it, can never be wholly shared, fully understood, actually realized by anyone other than ourselves. Alone, each of us comes to terms with our grief, our despair, even our guilt. Knowing that we are not alone in what we suffer, makes the difficulties each of us must face easier. We haven't been singled out, of that we're certain. Remembering that our challenges offer us the lessons we need in the school of life makes them more acceptable. In time, as our recovery progresses, we'll even look eagerly to our challenges as the real exciting opportunities for which we've been created. Suffering prompts the changes necessary for spiritual growth. It pushes us like no other experience to God--for understanding, for relief, for unwavering security. It's not easy to look upon suffering as a gift. And we need not fully understand it; however, in time, its value in our lives will become clear. I will not be wary of the challenges today. I will celebrate their part of my growth. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Continue to speak of alcoholism as an illness, a fatal malady. Talk about the conditions of body and mind which accompany it. Keep his attention focussed mainly on your personal experience. Explain that many are doomed who never realize their predicament. Doctors are rightly loath to tell alcoholic patients the whole story unless it will serve some good purpose. But you may talk to him about the hopelessness of alcoholism because you offer a solution. You will soon have your friend admitting he has many, if not all, of the traits of the alcoholic. If his own doctor is willing to tell him that he is alcoholic, so much the better. Even though your protégé may not have entirely admitted his condition, he has become very curious to know how you got well. Let him ask you that question, if he will. Tell him exactly what happened to you. Stress the spiritual feature freely. If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that He does not have to agree with your conception of God. He can choose any conception he likes, provided it makes sense to him. The main thing is that he be willing to believe in a Power greater than himself and that he live by spiritual principles. When dealing with such a person, you had better use everyday language to describe spiritual principles. There is no use arousing any prejudice he may have against certain theological terms and conceptions about which he may already be confused. Don’t raise such issues, no matter what your own convictions are. pp. 92-93 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. A friend took pity on me, I think, and invited me to his home for Thanksgiving. His parents were in town from the East Coast, and he was having a big party. There at the dinner table, I stood up and attempted suicide in front of everyone. The memory of that has always stuck in my mind as the definition of “pitiful, incomprehensible demoralization” that the Big Book talks about. What is sadder is that my actions had made sense to me at the time. p. 488 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." This new outlook was, we learned, something especially necessary to us alcoholics. For alcoholism had been a lonely business, even though we had been surrounded by people who loved us. But when self-will had driven everybody away and our isolation had become complete, it caused us to play the big shot in cheap barrooms and then fare forth alone on the street to depend upon the charity of passersby. We were still trying to find emotional security by being dominating or dependent upon others. Even when our fortunes had not ebbed that much and we nevertheless found ourselves alone in the world, we still vainly tried to be secure by some unhealthy kind of domination or dependence. For those of us who were like that, A.A. had a very special meaning. Through it we begin to learn right relations with people who understand us; we don't have to be alone any more. pp. 116-117 ************************************************** ********* Every day is a gift. That is why we call it the present. --unknown "Love only grows by sharing. You can only have more for yourself by giving it away to others." --Brian Tracy "The duty of helping one's self in the highest sense involves the helping of one's neighbors." --Samuel Smiles "Do not withhold good from those who deserve it when it's in your power to help them. If you can help your neighbor now, don't say, 'Come back tomorrow, and then I'll help you.'" --unknown Life's lessons are not taught in classrooms. --unknown "If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost, that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them." --Henry David Thoreau ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation GENEROSITY "And the Word was made flesh and dwelt amongst us." -- John (1:14) There is a beautiful fairy tale about a land where everybody had an abundance of "warm fuzzies" that they exchanged with each other and shared with each other. Everything in this land was wonderful because all the people were generously giving and receiving "warm fuzzies". Then a rumor began that there was to be a shortage of "warm fuzzies," and people began to hoard and selfishly protect their supply of "warm fuzzies." At this point, "cold pricklies" were introduced into the land. Sadness, pain, tension and persecution developed in the land, and the growth of the "cold pricklies" kept people separated, fearful and alone. The tragedy of this tale is that the rumor was not true! As long as people generously share their "warm fuzzies", they will never disappear. The "warm fuzzies" only disappear when they are not shared. The more we give, the more we receive. Abundance rests in giving, never hoarding! Master, may I always be generous with all that You have given me. ************************************************** ********* "For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord." Luke 2:11 "Then Jesus told him, 'Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.'" John 20:29 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Enthusiasm keeps the mind young and the spirit growing. Lord, may I always see wonder in the ordinary happenings of my day. No detail is too insignificant for God's attention. Lord, You encourage me daily as You guide my humblest moments. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Anonymity And Self-Will "The drive for personal gain... which brought so much pain in the past falls by the wayside if we adhere to the principle of anonymity." Basic Text pg. 73 The word anonymity itself means namelessness, but there's a larger principle at work in the anonymity of the NA program: the principle of selflessness. When we admit our powerlessness to manage our own lives, we take our first step away from self-will and our first step toward selflessness. The less we try to run our lives on self-will, the more we find the power and direction once so sorely lacking in our lives. But the principle of selflessness does a lot more than just make us feel better-it helps us live better. Our ideas of how the world should be run begin to lose their importance, and we stop trying to impose our will on everyone and everything around us. And when we abandon our "know-it-all" pretensions and start recognizing the value of other peoples' experience, we start treating them with respect. The interests of others become as important to us as our own; we start to think about what's best for the group, rather than just what's best for us. We start living a life that's bigger than we are, that's more than just us, our name, ourselves - we start living the principle of anonymity. Just for today: God, please free me from self-will. Help me understand the principle of anonymity; help me to live selflessly. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. We have no right to ask, when sorrow comes, Why did this happen to me? unless we ask the same question for every joy that comes our way. --Philip S. Bernstein All of us have reasons to be grateful. Usually, the word implies we have received something. We often think of gratitude as that warm feeling we get from someone else's generosity. We are particularly grateful when we get unexpected gifts from those who owe us nothing. Within a family, we expect such acts of love because we are close to one another. But gratitude doesn't always come from being a receiver. Gratitude is warmest when it accompanies the joy of being able to give without expecting anything in return. We find it isn't enough to feel grateful. We have to express our gratitude by showing kindness and service to everyone around us. Gratitude is the greatest of all heart-openers. When it enters the heart, love pours out. For every kindness we receive, gratitude inspires a hundred acts of giving. How can I show my gratitude today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. In the sphere of material things, giving means being rich. Not he who has much is rich, but he who gives much. --Erich Fromm Material possessions have great significance in our world. Not only do we strive to own a special car, electronic gear, and far more clothes than we need, but we also think in terms of possessing a girlfriend, or our health, or happiness, or things that cannot be owned. Some of us have become addicted to buying and owning things. This gimme-gimme mentality affects us all and, rather than enriching us, it impoverishes us. Tangible things enrich us only when we use them and share them to improve our lives and the lives of others. We don't need to be wealthy to share what we have with others. It is the sharing that nourishes us and builds bridges between us. Wise people have known for thousands of years that a man's spirituality is deeply affected by his relationship to his possessions. When we respect what we own as a gift from God and share it with others, we grow richer spiritually. I will hold my possessions loosely and with respect so they can be used well and shared. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. What we suffer, what we endure . . is done by us, as individuals, in private. --Louise Bogan Empathy we can give. Empathy we can find, and it comforts. But our pain, the depth of it, can never be wholly shared, fully understood, actually realized by anyone other than ourselves. Alone, each of us comes to terms with our grief, our despair, even our guilt. Knowing that we are not alone in what we suffer, makes the difficulties each of us must face easier. We haven't been singled out, of that we're certain. Remembering that our challenges offer us the lessons we need in the school of life makes them more acceptable. In time, as our recovery progresses, we'll even look eagerly to our challenges as the real exciting opportunities for which we've been created. Suffering prompts the changes necessary for spiritual growth. It pushes us like no other experience to God--for understanding, for relief, for unwavering security. It's not easy to look upon suffering as a gift. And we need not fully understand it; however, in time, its value in our lives will become clear. I will not be wary of the challenges today. I will celebrate their part of my growth. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. The Holidays Sometimes, the holidays are filled with the joy we associate with that time of year. The season flows. Magic is in the air. Sometimes, the holidays can be difficult and lonely. Here are some ideas I've learned through personal experience, and practice, to help us get through difficult holidays: Deal with feelings, but try not to dwell unduly on them. Put the holidays in perspective: A holiday is one day out of 365. We can get through any 24-hour period. Get through the day, but we aware that there may be a post holiday backlash. Sometimes, if we use our survival behaviors to get through the day, the feelings will catch up to us the next day. Deal with them too. Get back on track as quickly as possible. Find and cherish the love that's available, even if it's not exactly what we want. Is there someone we can give love to and receive love from? Recovering friends? Is there a family who would enjoy sharing their holiday with us? Don't be a martyr; go. There may be those who would appreciate our offer to share our day with them. We are not in the minority if we find ourselves experiencing a less than ideal holiday. How easy, but untrue, to tell ourselves the rest of the world is experiencing the perfect holiday, and we're alone in conflict. We can create our own holiday agenda. Buy yourself a present. Find someone to whom you can give. Unleash your loving, nurturing self and give in to the holiday spirit. Maybe past holidays haven't been terrific. Maybe this year wasn't terrific. But next year can be better, and the next a little better. Work toward a better life - one that meets your needs. Before long, you'll have it. God, help me enjoy and cherish this holiday. If my situation is less than ideal, help me take what's good and let go of the rest. Love fills me and heals me as I open to connect with the people that God has placed in my life. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Experience the Thrill of the Climb Don’t stop now. You’re almost there. You’ve worked so hard to climb this mountain. In the beginning, you were excited. Exhilarated at the prospect of the mountain you were about to climb. Now, you are almost to the top. You’ve struggled, gotten weary, and kept going. Now, your goal is in sight. Keep going. Guidance is still there to help you. The life force, the one that keeps you going, keeps you moving forward, is still there too, burning brightly within you, charging all that you do with its energy. It is more difficult for you to feel it, but that is only because you’re tired. See the mountain climber as he climbs the mountain. There are dangers and precipices and challenges along the way. But the higher he climbs, the steeper it gets. The more tired he is, the more energy he has to put into the climb. Don’t tell yourself that the way you feel is an indication you should stop. The way you feel now is the way anyone would feel who was so deeply committed to life. It’s the way anyone would feel who had committed to climbing that mountain. Don’t stop now. Relax as much as you can. Know that the rhythm of life is still there, moving you forward. Don’t look back. Focus intently on each step. Soon you will reach the top. Soon you will reach your goal. Soon you will experience the victory. Keep your eyes focused on the path, look straight ahead. Embrace the thrill of the climb. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Point to the good Identify three things you like. I was talking to my daughter on the phone one day after I had visited her at her house. I took a moment during the conversation, and I listed the three things I most enjoyed and liked best about our visit that day. She caught her breath. She knew I was being honest. “Really?” she asked. “I mean it,” I said. “I meant every word I just said. Do you want to spark that relationship with your friend, your child, your lover, employee, co-worker, or boss? Instead of criticizing everything you don’t like, say what you like best. Most people have their share of insecurities about themselves, their relationships, and how they do at performing a task. Instead of thinking you’re the only one who feels insecure, tell people something that will help them feel good about themselves and their relationship with you. Three is a good number, don’t you think. Look in your heart and find three things you genuinely like about someone. Then tell them clearly what those things are. God, help me start looking at the good in the people I love. *************************************** The Joy of Being Celebrating the In-Between Times by Madisyn Taylor Real life most often happens during the in-between times when we are not celebrating a special occasion. While celebrations are intended to honor life’s more momentous occasions, much of real life tends to happen during the in-between times. While moving from one moment in time to the next is seldom considered a significant occurrence, it is during those in-between times that we are most in tune with life’s most profound, albeit simple joys. Between birth and death, triumph and sorrow, beginnings and endings, we enjoy innumerable experiences that often happen unnoticed. These times are just as worthy of celebration. The in-between times are seldom about landmark moments. How you choose to celebrate them or which moments you choose to celebrate is up to you. You may want to celebrate the simple facts that you are alive and that every day is a chance to spend time with the people you care about or do the work that you love. Then again, when you look at the good that exists in your life, many reasons for celebrating the in-between times may become clear: a cup of your favorite tea, a beautiful sunrise, a good book, and the smell of fresh air can be reasons for celebration. Celebrating the in-between times can be as easy as paying special attention to them when they do happen, rather than taking them for granted. It’s your focus of attention that can turn an in-between time into a celebration. You can also pay homage to the in-between times by slowing down and allowing yourself time to look around and allow your heart and mind to take in all of your life’s wonders. Far too often, we can let those simple moments of awe pass us by. The in-between times are when life happens to us between the pauses that we take to honor our milestones occasions. Without the in-between times, there would be no big moments to celebrate. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Today is a special day in more ways than one. It’s a day that God has made, and I’m alive in God’s world. I know that all things in my life this day are an expression of God’s love — the fact that I’m alive, that I’m recovering, and that I’m able to feel the way I feel at this very instant. For me, this will be a day of gratitude. Am I deeply thankful for being a part of this special day, and for all my blessings? Today I Pray On this day of remembering God’s gift, may I understand that giving and receiving are the same. Each is part of each. If I give, I receive the happiness of giving. If I receive, I give someone else that same happiness of giving. I pray that I may give my self — my love and my strengths — generously. May I also receive graciously the love and strength of others’ selves. May God be our example. Today I Will Remember The magnitude of God’s giving. *************************************** One More Day All living souls welcome whatsoever they are ready to cope with….. – George Santayana So often, a problem would be overwhelming if we had to solve it all at once. We can allow ourselves to dwell only on small pieces of the problem at one time. Then, when we’ve come to terms with one part, another portion can be dealt with. Whether we are facing the death of a loved one or having to cope with other personal problems, our minds help us sort out the order in which we can best handle our pain. Sometimes, we insist on tackling all of the problem, and we think ourselves into a kind of numbness. We’re unable to act. At those times, perhaps we can remind ourselves of how our minds work best. If we do, we can let go of the whole situation and, instead, take on only the small part we’re strong enough to handle. Today, I will let go of all I’m trying to cope with. I will pick one or two small, positive things I can do. Then, I will do them. ***************************************** One Day At A Time HOLIDAYS May peace be more than a holiday; May love be more than a season; May the feelings deep inside transcend the calendar; And, instead, become a way of life. Anonymous It is the time of Hanukkah ... of Christmas ... of Kwanzaa ... and other holidays. It is the time when the world is at its best and the hearts of all seem to be brimming with love. It is also the time of year that my very soul finds the most difficult. My physical and emotional recovery is compromised, and memories occupy every cell in my body, causing this vulnerable addict tremendous turmoil. These holy days test the gifts of that enigma which is my Higher Power ... the God Of My Understanding ... and when these days are over and normality returns, I smile at having once again made it through the holidays intact. One Day at a Time . . . I acknowledge that in my Higher Power I have a love that can never be fathomed, A spiritual resource that can never be exhausted, A peace that can never be understood, A rest that can never be disturbed, A joy that can never be diminished, A hope that can never be disappointed, A glory that can never be clouded, A light that can never be darkened, And a life that can never die ... Even on holidays. ~ Mari ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. we are not fighting it, neither are avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality - safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition. - Pgs. 84-85 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote It often happens that you won't know the role addiction played in your life until you stop using. You have replace roles now. Learning new skills, and this is done at meetings and with your sponsor, is a necessary step in adjusting to your new circumstances. Rather than see additional burdens in new tasks, I choose to see them as a breath of new life. The Treasures Within Within me is the perfect life waiting to awaken. The gifts I seek are already within me. A deep pool of awareness and aliveness is present all of the time but I am too distracted to know it. I get so lost in the superficial details and tasks of my life that I forget to live it, to drop down and contact the spirit that God has planted within me. It is the best kept secret that spirit lives within me, that the way in which I come in touch with my inner light is through letting the constant preoccupations of my mind float by, not taking them so seriously, not trying to control them. Today I realize that the gold is not in my ability to control my mind, the gold is in what lies beneath. What emerges when my mind, for a precious moment, is stilled. Spirit is with me always - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote As you sponsor others, remember this: If you are trying to recreate someone in your own image, then one of you will be redundant. My job as a sponsor is to model, not mold, recovery for my sponsees. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Love fills me and heals me as I open to connect with the people that God has placed in my life. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote One drink's too many and a thousand is not enough.- Unknown origin. |
December 26
Daily Reflections ACCEPTING SUCCESS OR FAILURE Furthermore, how shall we come to terms with seeming failure or success? Can we now accept and adjust to either without despair or pride? Can we accept poverty, sickness, loneliness, and bereavement with courage and serenity? Can we steadfastly content ourselves with the humbler, yet sometimes more durable, satisfactions when the brighter, more glittering achievements are denied us? TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 112 After I found A.A. and stopped drinking, it took a while before I understood why the First Step contained two parts: my powerlessness over alcohol and my life's unmanageability. In the same way, I believed for a long time that, in order to be in tune with the Twelve Steps, it was enough for me "to carry this message to alcoholics." That was rushing things. I was forgetting that there were a total of Twelve Steps and that the Twelfth Step also had more than one part. Eventually I learned that it was necessary for me to "practice these principles" in all areas of my life. In working all the Steps thoroughly, I not only stay sober and help someone else to achieve sobriety, but also I transform my difficulty with living into a joy of living. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I am glad to be a part of A.A., of that great fellowship that is spreading over the United States and all over the world. I am only one of the many A.A.'s, but I am one. I am grateful to be living at this time, when I can help A.A. to grow, when it needs me to put my shoulder to the wheel and help keep the movement going. I am glad to be able to be useful, to have a reason for living, a purpose in life. I want to lose my life in this great cause and so find it again. Am I grateful to be an A.A.? Meditation For The Day These meditations can teach us how to relax. We can be of service to other people in a small way at least. And we can be happy while doing it. We should not worry too much about people we cannot help. We can make it a habit to leave the outcome of the things we do to the Higher Power. We can go along through life doing the best we can, but without a feeling of urgency or strain. We can enjoy all the good things and the beauty of life, but at the same time depend deeply on God. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may give my life to this worthwhile cause. I pray that I may enjoy the satisfaction that comes from good work well done. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Accepting God's Gifts, p. 168 "Though many theologians hold that sudden spiritual experiences amount to a special distinction, if not a divine appointment of some sort, I question this view. Every human being, no matter what his attributes for good or evil, is a part of the divine spiritual economy. Therefore, each of us has his place, and I cannot see that God intends to exalt one another. "So it is necessary for all of us to accept whatever positive gifts we receive with a deep humility, always bearing in mind that our negative attitudes were first necessary as a means of reducing us to such a state of that we would be ready for a gift of the positive ones via the conversion experience. Your own alcoholism and the immense deflation that finally resulted are indeed the foundation upon which your spiritual experience rests." Letter, 1964 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Humility: Teachable and Honest Open to growth. Humility& is often used in the context of being honest enough to admit one's faults, but it also means being teachable. The truly humble person realizes there's always more to learn and is open to such learning. If we think we have humility, we usually don't. However, we can look back and recognize times when we made wonderful progress while being deeply humble. This was particularly true when we recognized our alcoholism and achieved sobriety. In this one action, we changed our lives. If we continue to practice the honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness that helped get us sober, these traits will be apparent in other areas of our lives. Though humility isn't generally sought as a way of life, it's the right way for recovering people. I'll be open today to ideas from any direction. I can learn something from every person. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple To be emotionally committed to somebody is very difficult, but to be alone is impossible. --Stephen Sondheim. Let's face it, relationships are hard to work! But we are lucky! Recovery is about relationships. We learn how to set limits. We learn how to listen to and talk to others. In Step One, we begin a new relationship with ourselves. In Step Two and Three, we begin a relationship with our Higher Power. In later Steps, we mend our relationships with family and friends. In our relationship with our sponsor, we learn about being friends. And our past relationships with alcohol and other drugs is being replaced by people and our Higher Power. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thank-you for all the new relationships. Thank-you for teaching me how to feel human again. Action for the Day: Today, I'll make a list of all the new relationships I have now, due to my sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning It is only framed in space that beauty blooms; only in space are events, and objects and people unique and significant and therefore beautiful. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh We must look closely; focus intently on the subjects of our attention. Within these subjects is the explanation of life's mysteries. To observe anything closely means we must pull it aside with our minds and fondle it, perhaps. We must let the richness of the object, the person, the event, wash over us and savor its memory. Many of us only now are able to look around ourselves slowly, with care, noting the detail, the brilliant color of life. Each day is an opportunity to observe and absorb the beauty while it blooms. I will look for beauty today, in myself, and in a friend, and I will find it. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Your prospect may belong to a religious denomination. His religious education and training may be far superior to yours. In that case he is going to wonder how you can add anything to what he already knows. But he well be curious to learn why his own convictions have not worked and why yours seem to work so well. He may be an example of the truth that faith alone is insufficient. To be vital, faith must be accompanied by self sacrifice and unselfish, constructive action. Let him see that you are not there to instruct him in religion. Admit that he probably knows more about it than you do, but call to his attention the fact that however deep his faith and knowledge, he could not have applied it or he would not drink, Perhaps your story will help him see where he has failed to practice the very precepts he knows so well. We represent no particular faith or denomination. We are dealing only with general principles common to most denominations. pp. 93-94 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. As a result of that episode, I ended up seeing a psychiatrist to find out what was wrong with me. At our very first session she invited me to "tell me about yourself." I proceeded to do so, only to be told to stop after I had spoken for five minutes or so. She explained that she really only had two things to say to me: that she thought I hadn't told the truth since I walked into the office, and that I was an alcoholic. (It took me a long time to understand how a description of my life could make anyone think I was a drunk.) The doctor said that if I was going to continue to see her, I had to agree to do two things. First, she gave me a business card with a phone number on it. She said the next time I tried to kill myself, I should call that number first. Second, she was going to give me a book to read, and she wanted me to read the first few hundred pages before our next meeting. Before I left that day, she gave me a copy of the Big Book. pp. 488-489 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Most married folks in A.A. have very happy homes. To a surprising extent, A.A. has offset the damage to family life brought about by years of alcoholism. But just like all other societies, we do have sex and marital problems, and sometimes they are distressingly acute. Permanent marriage breakups and separations, however, are unusual in A.A. Our main problem is not how we are to stay married; it is how to be more happily married by eliminating the severe emotional twists that have so often stemmed from alcoholism. p. 117 ************************************************** ********* The paradox of control is simple. The more we try to control life, the less control we have. --Joan Borysenko, Ph.D. A person who possesses true peace is not one whose life is without problems and turmoil but is rather a person who has peace in spite of it. --unknown If you always do what you've always done, you will always be where you've always been. --unknown A B C = Acceptance, Belief, Change. When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation APATHY "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." -- Edmund Burke I read about the Holocaust and I am ashamed. I am ashamed to belong to the human race that allowed, by an overwhelming silence, the slaughter of millions. The ultimate in people-pleasing is to do nothing. The fear of being an outcast or traitor allows the addiction to Power to develop. Power is an addiction that is rarely discussed in society. And yet evil needs people and politics to function alone it is but a word. With this new day I seek to be involved in the good life. Today I am not afraid to stand alone for what I believe to be the principles of a God-given spirituality. I know evil because I know myself. I know tyranny and injustice because for years I perpetrated negativity in my life. Now I choose to say "no". Today I seek to make amends for past wrongs by being rigorously honest in all my affairs. Because I know what it is to hate, I seek to love. I wish to be responsible in God's world. Teach me not only to learn from past mistakes but translate this knowledge into action. ************************************************** ********* "Nothing will be impossible with God." Luke 1:37 Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; His greatness no one can fathom. Psalm 145:3 "Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength." Deuteronomy 6:5 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you think success and really believe it will happen, you will perform in a manner that leads to success. Lord, may I always avoid negative thoughts and visualize myself in the manner that You intended for me. We are powerless to change our past, but we can change how we look at it. Lord, help me to realize that my past has made me a stronger person and show me that these experiences have taught me valuable life lessons. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Never-Failing Power "As we learn to trust this Power, we begin to overcome our fear of life." Basic Text pg. 24 We are people accustomed to placing all our eggs in one basket. Many of us had one particular drug of choice that was our favorite. We relied on it to get us through each day and make life bearable. We were faithful to that drug; in fact, we committed ourselves to it without reservation. And then it turned on us. We had been betrayed by the only thing we had ever depended on, and the betrayal left us floundering. Now that we've stumbled into the rooms of recovery, we may be tempted to rely on another human being to meet our needs. We may expect this from our sponsor, our lover, or our best friend. But dependence on human beings is risky. They fall short of perfection. They may be on vacation, sleeping, or in a bad mood when we need them. Our dependence must rest on a Power greater than ourselves. No human force can restore our sanity, care for our will and our lives, or be unconditionally available and loving whenever we are in need. We place our trust in the God of our understanding, for only that Power will never fail us. Just for today: I will place my trust in a Power greater than myself, for only that Power will never let me down. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I take it that what all men are really after is some form of, perhaps only some formula of, peace. --James Conrad When snow drifts quietly down on a winter evening, the hush of nature brings a great sense of peace. Each of us has known times like this. Many of these times did not depend on conditions like snow, or soft music. When we are able to keep a quiet center within ourselves, we are truly in tune with the spirit. Peace of the heart comes from a Power greater than ourselves, and from the faith that all of us, and all that happens to us, are part of a great plan. Just as the snow falls softly, without fear, without regard for whether it will land on a tree bough or in the street, we, too, can live our lives with peaceful acceptance of whatever comes along, knowing it comes to us naturally and from God. Am I prepared to accept wherever I will land today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. He who knows how to be poor knows everything. --Jules Michelet Letting go is one of the simple yet profound spiritual tasks taught by many of the world's religions. Knowing how to be poor means knowing how to have a full and rich life without a dependent relationship with material wealth, food, chemicals, or sex. It means not relying on the props in life like expensive clothes, a prestigious job, or a sporty car, but relying only on the basics. Knowing how to be poor is knowing we are not in control and not wasting our serenity in trying. It means being completely honest in all things. It means knowing life is neither easy nor free of pain. Learning how to be poor is learning how to let go of all the essentials and appreciating the simplicity that endures. We don't automatically know how to do that, but we can learn. I don't expect to know everything, but my Higher Power can guide me and show me how to let go. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. It is only framed in space that beauty blooms; only in space are events, and objects and people unique and significant and therefore beautiful. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh We must look closely; focus intently on the subjects of our attention. Within these subjects is the explanation of life's mysteries. To observe anything closely means we must pull it aside with our minds and fondle it, perhaps. We must let the richness of the object, the person, the event, wash over us and savor its memory. Many of us only now are able to look around ourselves slowly, with care, noting the detail, the brilliant color of life. Each day is an opportunity to observe and absorb the beauty while it blooms. I will look for beauty today, in myself, and in a friend, and I will find it. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Growth Just as when we were children and grew out of favorite toys and clothes, we sometimes grow out of things as adults - people, jobs, and homes. This can be confusing. We may wonder why someone or something that was so special and important to us last year doesn't fit the same way in our life today. We may wonder why our feelings have changed. When we were children, we may have tried to fit an outgrown article of clothing on to our body. Now, as adults, we may go through a time of trying to force fit attitudes that we have outgrown. We may need to do this to give ourselves time to realize the truth. What worked last year, what was so important and special to us in times past, doesn't work anymore because we've changed. We've grown. We can accept this as a valid and important part of recovery. We can let ourselves go through experimentation and grief as we struggle to make something fit, trying to figure out if indeed it no longer fits, and why. We can explore our feelings and thoughts around what has happened. Then, we can put last year's toys away and make room for the new. Today, I will let last year's toys be what they were: last year's toys. I will remember them with fondness for the part they played in my life. Then, I will put them away and make room for the new. I live today as I want to remember my life. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Take Time to Be with People You Love I left Colorado driving toward the canyons of southern Utah. I had a lot of places left to visit on my journey, a lot of work left to do. But something, rather someone, was pulling on me. My daughter, Nichole. She was in college in Arizona. When she finished exams, she planned to head to Minnesota to spend the summer there. We had talked about meeting somewhere midway. Now it didn’t look like that would work out. It might be months before we saw each other again. From where I was in Colorado, she was a hard day’s drive away. Besides, I had already been through Arizona, and it would take another day to get back to where I was now. I continued on my way. The pull from Nichole continued,too. Finally, I turned the car around and headed toward my daughter. When I arrived at her dorm about ten that night, I called her room. She asked where I was now on my journey. I told her I was downstairs in the lobby of her dorm. She flew down the steps. We hugged and kissed. And we spent the next three days at a nearby hotel. She studied and wrote her term paper. We visited. Watched movies. Ate food. Laughed. Cried. And shared memories. It was one of the nicest times we’d had together in years. When it came time to leave, Nichole packed her car and headed for Minnesota. I headed back toward Utah, stopping to enjoy the scenery of the Grand Canyon, scenery I had missed along my way. I felt renewed and refreshed. I hadn’t lost any time. I had gained the gifts of the heart. We search for sacred spaces, spiritual experiences, and truths. But the holiest places are often found when we spend time with people we love. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go The magic is in you Sometimes, we play a little trick on ourselves. We may get so close to someone, we think, I don’t have to let go. Or we may become so successful at manifesting events in our lives, we think, I don’t have to let go. When I want something, it just appears. Anytime we forget to let go, life will jog us back into remembering. There is nothing that we can cling to in this world. Ultimately, all that we hold dear will require us to let go, in some shape or form. That child will grow up and leave home. That love relationship that’s going so wonderfully? A new cycle will come, in its time. That friendship will change. That job you thought you’d always have? Oops, the company merged. Your position is changed. Although long-term relationships and secure employment and living in that house feels good, remember, that’s not where your security lies. Let yourself bond. Get close to that woman, or man. Let yourself enjoy being friends with the best friend you’ve ever had. Be a loving parent, 100 percent. Throw yourself into that job with all your heart and soul. But your security and joy are not in that other person or job. The magic is in you. Don’t get angry when the time comes in your life to let go. Open your heart to that person, place, or thing, and say, “Thanks for teaching me to love and helping me to grow.” Then let him or her go, without resentment in your heart. Because even though that time has come to an end, love can’t be lost. Even if it means an end to the best time you’ve had yet in your life. Look around at where you are now. Don’t forget to enjoy it,too. This will be the next best time you’ll have. Remember, love is a gift from God. God, help me keep my head up, my heart open, and know I’ll always be guided along the path. *************************************** Centering Ourselves Gathering Our Straying Thoughts by Madisyn Taylor All too often our lives can be spread too thin and it becomes important to gather our thoughts and center ourselves to become whole again. When our thoughts are scattered in several directions at once and we are no longer conscious of what we are doing or why, it is time to center ourselves. When we center ourselves, we begin by acknowledging that we have become spread too thin and we are no longer unified inside. Our thoughts might be out of sync with our feelings, and our actions may be out of sync with both. The main signs that we need to center ourselves are scattered thoughts and a feeling of disconnection or numbness, as if we are no longer able to take anything in. In addition, we may feel unfocused and not present in our bodies. Centering ourselves is a way of coming to terms with all the different energies within us and drawing them back into ourselves. Centering yourself means that you are working from or being aware of the core of your being in the solar plexus area of your body. At first it may not make sense, but as you progress you will understand what this feels like. We naturally know how to center ourselves when we take a deep breath, for example, before making a big announcement or doing something big. Another way to center ourselves is to sit down and engage in breath meditation. We can start by simply getting into a comfortable upright position and noticing as our breath enters and leaves our bodies. Our breath flows into our center and out from our center, and this process can serve as a template for all of our interactions in the world. In conversations, we can take what our friends are saying into the center of our beings and respond from the center. Our whole lives mirror this ebb and flow of energy that begins and ends at the center of ourselves. If we follow this ebb and flow, we are in harmony with the uni! verse, and when we find we are out of harmony, we can always come back into balance by sitting down and observing our breath. When we sit down to center ourselves we can imagine that we are gathering our straying thoughts and energies back into ourselves, the way a mother duck gathers her babies around her. We can also visualize ourselves casting a net and pulling all the disparate parts of ourselves back to the center of our being, creating a sense of fluid integration. From this place of centeredness, we can begin again, directing ourselves outward in a more intentional way. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day None of us can claim to know God in all His fullness. None of us can really claim to understand our Higher Power to any extent. But this I do know: there is a Power beyond my human will which can do wonderful, loving things for me that I can’t do for myself. I see this glorious power at work in my own being, and I see the miraculous results of this same power in the lives of thousands upon thousands of other recovering people who are my friends in The Program. Do I need the grace of God and the loving understanding of my friends in The Program any less now than when I began my recovery? Today I Pray May I never forget that my spiritual needs are as great today as they were when I came into The Program. It is so easy to look at others, newer to the recovery process, and regard them as the needy ones. As I think of myself as increasingly independent, may I never overlook my dependence on my Higher Power. Today I will Remember I will never outgrow my need for God. *************************************** One More Day Never let life’s hardships disturb you. After all, no one can avoid problems, not even saints or sages. – Nichiren Daishonen A worry-free life. Wouldn’t that be the ticket? It’s hard to even imagine what life would be like with no problems. Once in a while a person will say, “If only I’d known…I never would have.” Or, “If I had understood, I should have…” We can’t life life always regretting past mistakes, and we shouldn’t fear furture ones either. The key to survival is not maintaining a stiff upper lip, as we hae been told, but to express our vulnerability. Stoicism gets nothing but more stress, so we’re learning to acknowledge our hardships as they come along. We’re not complaining or whining. We’re just bonding ourselves to the rest of the human race. I can face new problems, not because I’m so strong, but because I can honestly admit my weaknesses. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~VISION~ A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral. Antoine De Saint-Exupery It never ceases to amaze me how the disease of compulsive overeating distorts the vision. Some compulsive overeaters can look into a mirror and see a fat person where there is none. Others can look into the same mirror and not see the weight that is there. Recovery brings new eyes to the compulsive overeater. It lets us to see what's really there in the mirror. Recovery allows each of us to see the cathedral we really are, rather than the pile of rubble we think we see. Recovery corrects our vision. One Day at a Time . . . As I work my recovery program, I will see myself as I really am, rather than seeing what the disease shows me. Jeff ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Yes, there is a long period of reconstruction ahead. We must take the lead. A remorseful mumbling that we are sorry won't fill the bill at all. - Pg.83 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote To insist stubbornly on clinging to old relationships, when they are basically drug oriented relationships is sabotaging our recovery process. Is it not our disease finding a 'good' excuse to keep us close to drugs? May I be able to hear the suggestions of those who work with me. May I listen in this next hour and follow the suggestions. Being with Life Today, I allow myself just to be with life. Somehow it doesn't have to prove anything to me or give me any more than I already have to be okay. The lessons I have learned through sincere dedication to my own inner growth, have taught me that I can face my most difficult feelings and still come home to a place of love and acceptance. Life is always renewing itself; nothing lasts, good or bad, and that is just the way it is. It is enough today to enjoy my coffee, to take a walk, to appreciate the people in my life. I can rest in a quiet sort of understanding that this is what it's all about; all the searching turned up such an ordinary but beautiful thing. I am enraptured with the ordinary - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Everyone has problems. Your problem though, is not the real problem. The real problem is how you deal with the original problem. I work the program, not the problem. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Are you going to let bad times make you bitter or make you better? Time for Joy - Book - Quote I live today as I want to remember my life. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote The Twelve Steps when simmered down to the last, resolve themselves into two words: 'Love' and 'Service'. - Dr. Bob. |
December 27
Daily Reflections PROBLEM SOLVING "Quite as important was the discovery that spiritual principles would solve all my problems." ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 42 Through the recovery process described in the Big Book, I have come to realize that the same instructions that work on my alcoholism, work on much more. Whenever I am angry or frustrated, I consider the matter a manifestation of the main problem within me, alcoholism. As I "walk" through the Steps, my difficulty is usually dealt with long before I reach the Twelfth "suggestion," and those difficulties that persist are remedied when I make an effort to carry the message to someone else. These principles do solve my problems! I have not encountered an exception, and I have been brought to a way of living which is satisfying and useful. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I need the A.A. principles for the development of the buried life within me, that good life, which I had misplaced, but which I found again in this fellowship. This life within me is developing slowly but surely, with many set-backs, many mistakes, many failures, but still developing. As long as I stick close to A.A., my life will go on developing, and I cannot yet know what it will be, but I know that it will be good. That's all I want to know. It will be good. Am I thanking God for A.A.? Meditation For The Day Build your life on the firm foundation of true gratitude to God for all His blessings and true humility because of your unworthiness of these blessings. Build the frame of your life out of self-discipline, never let yourself get selfish or lazy or contented with yourself. Build the walls of your life out of service to others, helping others find the way to live. Build the roof of your life out of prayer and quiet times, waiting for God's guidance from above. Build a garden around your life out of peace of mind and serenity and a sure faith. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may build my life on A.A. principles. I pray that it may be a good building when my work is finished. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Servant, Not Master, p.259 In A.A., we found that it did not matter too much what our material condition was, but it mattered greatly what our spiritual condition was. As we improved our spiritual outlook, money gradually became our servant and not our master. It became a means of exchanging love and services with those about us. ******************************** One of A.A.'s Loners is an Austrian sheepman who lives two thousand miles from the nearest town, where yearly he sells his wool. In order to be paid the best prices he has to get to town during a certain month. But when he heard that a big regional A.A. meeting was to be held at a later date when wool prices would have fallen, he gladly took heavy financial loss in order to make his journey then. That's how much an A.A. meeting means to him. 1. 12 & 12, p.122 2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p.31 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Limiting Gossip No harm to others. "When you've told me their names, do not tell me their faults," a person said at an AA meeting. She was explaining how careful we must be to keep gossip within tight limits. However, it is possible to identify people in gossip without actually speaking their names. We can give so many facts that the listener can identify whom we're discussing. This is no less malicious and thoughtless than actually naming the person. We can avoid these dangers by giving up both the desire to gossip and the wish to listen to gossip. We will always have matters to gossip about; we can always find weaknesses in those we envy, faults in people we want to see taken down a notch or two. But if we persist in the program, we should find ourselves moving out of this limited way of thinking. We'll put severe limits on gossip at the same time. I'll sidestep gossip if it starts to find a way into my life today. Under God's guidance, I have better things to do. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Reading is to the Mind, what exercise is to the body. Good ideas are the seeds that start our growth. We hear things at meetings. We listen to our sponsor. Maybe we listen to program tapes. And we read. Reading is special because we do it when we're alone. We read in quiet times, when we can think. We can read as fast or as slow as we want. We can mark special words and come back to them again and again. We'll figure things out in our way, but we need help to get started. That's why we read. It gives us good ideas to think about. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, speak to me through helpful readings and help me learn at my best pace. Action for the Day: Reading is easier the more I do it. Today I'll feel proud that I've read program ideas to get my mind thinking in a healthy way. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning One needs something to believe in, something for which one can have wholehearted enthusiasm. --Hannah Senesh Life offers little, if we sit passively in the midst of activity. Involvement is a prerequisite if we are to grow. For our lives' purposes we need enthusiasm; we need enthusiasm in order to greet the day expectantly. When we look toward the day with anticipation, we are open to all the possibilities for action. We must respond to our possibilities if we are to mature emotionally and recover spiritually. Idly observing life from the sidelines guarantees no development beyond our present level. We begin to change once we start living up to our commitment to the program, its possibilities and our purpose, and it's that change, many days over, that moves us beyond the negative, passive outlook of days gone by. The program has offered us something to believe in. We are no longer the women we were. So much more have we become! Each day's worth of recovery carries us closer to fulfilling our purpose in life. I believe in recovery, my own; when I believe in success, I'll find it. There is magic in believing. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Outline the program of action, explaining how you made a self-appraisal, how you straightened out your past and why you are now endeavoring to be helpful to him. It is important for him to realize that your attempt to pass this on to him plays a vital part in your recovery. Actually, he may be helping you more than you are helping him. Make it plain he is under no obligation to you, that you hope only that he will try to help other alcoholics when he escapes his own difficulties. Suggest how important it is that he place the welfare of other people ahead of his own. Make it clear that he is not under pressure, that he needn’t see you again if he doesn’t want to. You should not be offended if he wants to call it off, for he has helped you more than you have helped him. If your talk has been sane, quiet and full of human understanding, you have perhaps made a friend. Maybe you have disturbed him about the question of alcoholism. This is all to the good. The more hopeless he feels, the better. he will be more likely to follow your suggestions. p. 94 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. It took some time, but I eventually made it to my first meeting. I had gone out on New Year's Eve. When I came to, I thought it was the next morning. As I held my head steady, popped some aspirin, and tried to drink a cup of coffee, I glanced at the front page of the newspaper. It was January 9, and I had been in a blackout for over a week. After everything else that had happened, that was terrifying enough to get me to my first meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous. p. 489 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Nearly every sound human being experiences, at some time in life, a compelling desire to find a mate of the opposite sex with whom the fullest possible union can be made --spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical. This mighty urge is the root of great human accomplishments, a creative energy that deeply influences our lives. God fashioned us that way. So our question will be this: How, by ignorance, compulsion, and self-will, do we misuse this gift for our own destruction? We A.A. cannot pretend to offer full answers to age-old perplexities, but our own experience does provide certain answers that work for us. p. 117 ************************************************** ********* A person who possesses true peace is not one whose life is without problems and turmoil but is rather a person who has peace in spite of it. --unknown "You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses." --Tom Wilson Everyone has a gift for something, even if it is the gift of being a good friend. --Marian Anderson Everyone wants to be appreciated, so if you appreciate someone, don't keep it a secret. --Mary Kay Ash The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself. --Anna Quindlen It's never too late — in fiction or in life — to revise. --Nancy Thayer ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation LIES "Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle that fits them all." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes To lie is to rob life of meaning. In my addiction I was a liar, not just by what I said but by what I did, what I left unsaid and by my manipulation with half-truths. All lies shut out truth making us prisoners of fantasy and illusion. The world becomes what we want it to be rather than what it is and reality is lost. The liar is forced into the prison of loneliness, despair and isolation because nobody can know him, nobody can understand him. His language and communication are ego-centered. The liar is not living in the real world. He is living in his own world, with his own rules and definitions. The lies are the killing wounds, and they are self-inflicted. Today I prefer the pain of truth to the passing satisfaction of the lie and the habit of telling the truth is growing in me! God of Truth, may You ever be reflected in the life I seek to live. ************************************************** ********* Every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it, that it may bear more fruit. John 15:2 "I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:14 But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Here there is no conflict with the law. Galatians 5:22-23 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration When we become aware that we possess all the spiritual treasures necessary for a productive and happy life, we will never want for anything. Lord, You are a limitless source of abundance and love. There is not one moment that we are separated from God's care unless we choose to be. Lord, You provide for my daily needs and deliver me from evil. You are my refuge. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today God Could Restore Us To Sanity "The process of coming to believe restores us to sanity. The strength to move into action comes from this belief." Basic Text pg. 24 Now that we've finally admitted our insanity and seen examples of it in all its manifestations, we might be tempted to believe that we are doomed to repeat this behavior for the rest of our lives. Just as we thought that our active addiction was hopeless and we'd never get clean, we might now believe that our particular brand of insanity is hopeless. Not so! We know that we owe our freedom from active addiction to the grace of a loving God. If our Higher Power can perform such a miracle as relieving our obsession to use drugs, surely this Power can also relieve our insanity in all its forms. If we doubt this, all we have to do is think about the sanity that has already been restored to our lives. Maybe we've gotten carried away with our credit cards, but sanity returns when we admit defeat and cut them all up. Perhaps we've been feeling lonely and want to go visit our old using buddies. Going to visit our sponsor instead is a sane act. The insanity of our addiction recedes into the past as we begin experiencing moments of sanity in our recovery. Our belief in a Power greater than ourselves grows as we begin to understand that even our brand of insanity is nothing in the face of this Power. Just for today: I thank the God of my understanding for each sane act in my life, for I know they are indications of my restoration to sanity. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. In this sad world of ours, sorrow comes to all, and it often comes with bitter agony. Perfect relief is not possible except with time. --Abraham Lincoln Time may or may not heal all wounds. It depends on how we use the time. If we deny our sorrow, or runaway from it, or hope it will just go away by itself, we will be miserable. But if we turn and face it, and express our sadness in healthy ways, somehow we are transformed by the sorrow itself. While the loss is still there, it begins not to hurt so much. We can express our sadness in many ways. Crying is probably the healthiest means of expressing grief. It's good to cry, even for men, because it releases tension and stress, and we find a little peace afterwards. It is true that tears are healing. Getting angry and expressing our anger in appropriate, healthy ways also helps to heal wounds of loss, strange as it may seem. Yes, in time and with the courage to express our feelings, our wounds are indeed healed. What is a healthy way to express my anger at a loss? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value. --Albert Einstein The marketplace and fashion entice us in countless ways to indulge our individual pleasures. Some say that success will be with the man who follows those seductive beckonings. Even sacrificing long hours by working two jobs to become a financial success or to achieve high career goals can be self-centered activity. It may be time and energy spent seeking power and glory at the cost of time with our family and friends - time for enjoying each other and growing. Sadly, external success leads to superficial pleasure but never to peace within ourselves. However, when we pursue the values of honesty, humility, and service, we will find enduring self-respect and close friendships. This path provides a genuine experience of life's greatest rewards rather than the glitter of passing excitement. Today, I will strive toward the greater values rather than superficial successes. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. One needs something to believe in, something for which one can have wholehearted enthusiasm. --Hannah Senesh Life offers little, if we sit passively in the midst of activity. Involvement is a prerequisite if we are to grow. For our lives' purposes we need enthusiasm; we need enthusiasm in order to greet the day expectantly. When we look toward the day with anticipation, we are open to all the possibilities for action. We must respond to our possibilities if we are to mature emotionally and recover spiritually. Idly observing life from the sidelines guarantees no development beyond our present level. We begin to change once we start living up to our commitment to the program, its possibilities and our purpose, and it's that change, many days over, that moves us beyond the negative, passive outlook of days gone by. The program has offered us something to believe in. We are no longer the women we were. So much more have we become! Each day's worth of recovery carries us closer to fulfilling our purpose in life. I believe in recovery, my own; when I believe in success, I'll find it. There is magic in believing. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Near the Top I know you're tired. I know you feel overwhelmed. You may feel as though this crisis, this problem, this hard time will last forever. It won't. You are almost through. You don't just think it has been hard; it has been hard. You have been tested, tried, and retested on what you have learned. Your beliefs and your faith have been tried in fire. You have believed, then doubted, then worked at believing some more. You have had to have faith even when you could not see or imagine what you were asked to believe. Others around you may have tried to convince you not to believe in what you were hoping you could believe. You have had opposition. You have not gotten to this place with total support and joy. You have had to work hard, in spite of what was happening around you. Sometimes, what motivated you was anger; sometimes fear. Things went wrong - more problems occurred than you anticipated. There were obstacles, frustrations, and annoyances en route. You did not plan on this being the way it would evolve. Much of this has been a surprise; some of it has not been at all what you desired. Yet, it has been good. Part of you, the deepest part that knows truth, has sensed this all along, even when your head told you that things were out of whack and crazy; that there was no plan or purpose, that God had forgotten you. So much has happened, and each incident - the most painful, the most troubling, and the most surprising - has a connection. You are beginning to see and sense that. You never dreamt things would happen this way, did you? But they did. Now you are learning the secret - they were meant to happen this way, and this way is good, better than what you expected. You didn't believe it would take this long, either - did you? But it did. You have learned patience. You never thought you could have it, but now you know you do. You have been led. Many were the moments when you thought you were forgotten, when you were convinced you had been abandoned. Now you know you have been guided. Now things are coming into place. You are almost at the end of this phase, this difficult portion of the journey. The lesson is almost complete. You know - the lesson you fought, resisted, and insisted you could not learn. Yes, that one. You have almost mastered it. You have been changed from the inside out. You have been moved to a different level, a higher level, a better level. You have been climbing a mountain. It has not been easy, but mountain climbing is never easy. Now, you are near the top. A moment longer, and the victory shall be yours. Steady your shoulders. Breathe deeply. Move forward in confidence and peace. The time is coming to relish and enjoy all, which you have fought for. That time is drawing near, finally. I know you have thought before that the time was drawing near, only to learn that it wasn't. But now, the reward is coming. You know that too. You can feel it. Your struggle has not been in vain. For every struggle on this journey, there is a climax, a resolution. Peace, joy, abundant blessings, and reward are yours here on earth. Enjoy. There will be more mountains, but now you know how to climb them. And you have learned the secret of what is at the top. Today, I will accept where I am and continue pushing forward. If I am in the midst of a learning experience, I will allow myself to continue on with the faith that the day of mastery and reward will come. Help me, God; understand that despite my best efforts to live in peaceful serenity, there are times of mountain climbing. Help me stop creating chaos and crisis, and help me meet the challenges that will move me upward and forward. Today I am unveiling my layers and layers of self-doubt and letting them go. Today I am taking back all the power I have given to others by discovering the courage that comes from my own wisdom. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Embrace Your Destiny Her words were simple but profound. “Fall in love with your destiny.” How often we search outside of ourselves for some elusive moment, for an experience like someone else is having, for an emotion we’d like to feel but aren’t, at least not right now. How often we long to be somewhere other than where we are, or someone other than who we are. How easy it can be to complain about and regret our past, thinking it’s somehow wrong. The answer is to fall in love– fall in love with our own life. Our destiny isn’t some far-off moment or something that happens to someone else. Our destiny is taking place right now. It’s been happening all along. Destiny is that mysterious force or energy that magically intertwines with choice, free will, and fate. Let all those elements weave together and create your life. But know you can help to create it too, by falling in love with your own life. Love all the places you have gone and all the places you will go. Love the lessons you have learned and the way you have learned them. Most of all, love where you are right now. Because that’s where your destiny lies. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Cherish the glimmers of light I know people who have been enmeshed in extremely hard times. One woman lost her husband and both children in a fire. Another found her teenage child hung to death– suicide– on her back porch one Sunday in the spring. I’ve known people struggling with chronic depression. I’ve known people who lost their fortunes in one swoop. I’ve known people who were active, healthy people one day, and the next day an accident paralyzed them for life. I had my years of grief,too, after the death of my son. Year after year the pain pounded incessantly, threatening never to abate. Listen carefully. I pray you will never have such a time. But even if you’re going through something like that, make every moment count. And pay special attention to the moments when the pain and the suffering subside, even if it’s only for a few seconds or hours. Count those moments as a gift, a glimmer of light. Hold them in your heart. Write in your journal about how much it hurts. Feel all your pain. But take the time to document those brief moments each week when just a glimmer of pleasure sets in. Remember, two plus two equals four. Four plus four equals eight. Those moments will add up. You might not be going through a time in your life that you relish, but try to find a few moments where you can catch your breath, look around, and say how sweet it is. God, help me find at least one thing in my life that makes me feel good and gives me pleasure, even if it’s for only one moment of my day. *************************************** Clarity of Soul Chakra Clearing Exercise by Madisyn Taylor Just as the spaces we inhabit need to be cleared of clutter, our energetic fields must also be cleared of the old. Just as the physical spaces we inhabit require that we clear them periodically of clutter, the energetic fields that are a vital part of our being must also be cleared of old thoughts, energy, and emotions. Clearing your chakras and your aura restores and strengthens your connection to yourself and your divine inner wisdom. Unfettered by energetic baggage masquerading as fear, pain, and self-hatred, your consciousness is once again free to grow. If you find the thought of clearing your energy fields disconcerting, simply think of it as cleansing the energy that surrounds you and releasing any stagnancy. You may not be able to see the results of your efforts, but you will experience a lightness of being and clarity of mind. You can begin by sitting or lying down on a comfortable surface. Take a series of deep breaths and allow your soul to connect with Mother Earth and the vast expanse of the Universe. Visualize your first chakra, situated near the tailbone, and imagine if you will, a valve opening there, much like a faucet. Imagine a cord dropping from your tailbone deep into Mother Earth and let everything that is stagnant within you flow through it. Let go of old energy, inactive thoughts, and anything else that no longer serves you. Ask the earth to accept what you are offering by turning this old energy into light. Continue to let old energy drain out of you until you feel like you’ve released all your energetic baggage. When you are done, imagine the valve closing. Before moving on to clear your next chakra, let vibrant terra cotta light travel upward from the earth and through the cord into your first chakra. Repeat this process with all seven of the body’s chakras. The second chakra i! s orange, the third is yellow, the fourth is green, the fifth is blue, the sixth is indigo and the 7th is violet. Afterward, visualize your crown chakra and draw beautiful, golden-white light from the universe flowing down through the top of your head. Release any worries or fears that you have been holding on to. Draw this light into your aura and enjoy the resultant feeling of peace. To finish clearing your energy and ensure that you have rid yourself of the last vestiges of clutter, take a bath infused with one cup apple cider vinegar, one cup Epsom salt, and one cup sea salt. After completing this exercise, be sure to thank Mother Earth and the universe for their help. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “The central characteristics of the spiritual experience,” wrote AA co-founder Bill W., ‘is that it gives the recipient a new and better motivation out of all proportion to any process of discipline, belief, or faith. These experiences cannot make us whole at once; they are a rebirth to a fresh and certain opportunity.” Do I see my assets as God’s gifts, which have been in part matched by an increasing willingness on my part to find and do His will for me? Today I Pray I pray for the wholeness of purpose that can only come through spiritual experience. No amount of intellectual theory, pep-talking to myself, disciplined deprivation, “doing it for” somebody else can accomplish the same results. May I pray for spiritual enlightenment, not only in order to recover, but for itself. Today I Will Remember Total motivation through spiritual wholeness. *************************************** One More Day For age is opportunity no less Than youth itself, though in another dress, And as evening twilight fades away the sky is filled with starts, invisible day. – Henry Waddsworth Longfellow As young children we probably had favorite elderly people who made us feel special. We never gave much thought to their age. During young adulthood, however, we may have begun to dread getting elder. For some reason we saw the outward signs of aging as the beginning of the end. As we become wiser and more mature, we come to realize that we once again venerate elderly people — for their wisdom, for their love, for their skills, and especially, for their joy of living. Many of us seem to choose one or two special people whom we wish to be like. And then we try our hardest to measure up. I look forward to the wisdom and joy of living that often come with age. I am no longer afraid. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ JOY~ Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment, and want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations. George Bernard Shaw For many years my life was filled with pain and I felt totally empty inside. I did what I had to do for my children and for the people around me, but with a heavy heart, and life seemed to be one endless day after the other. What had happened to all the dreams and hopes I had for a life filled with joy and happiness? Sometimes the pain got to be so great that life just didn't seem to be worthwhile any more. At times I even contemplated ending my life. I have often heard it said that the opposite of pain is joy but in those dark days, I certainly couldn't see that. It is only in recovery that I see that the pain had a meaning, and it has brought me to a great appreciation of all the miracles in my life. I can appreciate the beauty in nature, and for the first time in a very long time my soul is filled with joy. When I listen to Beethoven's glorious Ninth Symphony with its last movement, the choral piece set to the poet Schiller's "Ode to Joy", I begin to realize that one can create something truly wondrous out of one's pain and suffering. Beethoven wrote this magnificent work shortly before his death, when he was in tremendous emotional pain and totally deaf. Yet he created this truly amazing piece of music that lives on nearly 200 years after his death, and will probably do so for many years to come. I now realize that there was a reason for my suffering and if, out of that, I can bring some joy or happiness to others, then my life will have had some purpose. It is only through this fellowship that I have been able to see that. One Day at a Time . . . I will always remember that my pain has been a growing experience that enables me to share what I have learned with other fellow sufferers. I can now appreciate all the miracles that my Higher Power performs in my life, and I am now truly able to experience joy. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Young people may be encouraged by man's experience to think that they can stop, as he did, on their own will power. We doubt if many of them can do it, because none will really want to stop, and hardly one of them, because of the peculiar twist already acquired, will find he can win out. Several of our crowd, men of thirty or less, had been drinking only a few years, but they found themselves as helpless as those who had been drinking twenty years. - Pg. 33 - More About Alcoholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Sometimes it is tough to stay away from our drug of choice for a whole day. The call and craving are so strong! When we can't manage a whole day, we manage this hour. When the hour is up, we manage one more until we are clean. Help me to stay clean and sober, from one hour to the next. Appreciating What I Have Today I won't let my desire for more, blind me to what's already here. My life is full of blessings that I look right past when all I see is what's missing rather than what is there. Desire is natural and good, I need to feel it to grow and reach beyond myself. But today, I will appreciate what I already have before I ask for more. Appreciation is like water on a plant, it causes good to grow in my life. What I appreciate expands. It grows before my eyes, it deepens and widens. The mere act of appreciation somehow creates more of what I am already giving thanks for. It opens doors to the coffers of this generous world and invites the its bounty to come in. Appreciation lets the creative universe know that I am grateful for what is being so freely given to me. Today I will appreciate what I have knowing that it opens a doorway to increase - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote It is remarkable how often we run across this feeling of 'uniqueness' as we recover. We may brag that we used more, had worse contacts, spent more in bars, treated our family worse, were younger, older, blacker, gayer, more sensitive--whatever. I am the only 'me' there is ever going to be. I do not try to convince others that I am a better me than they. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you have one hand in the fellowship and one hand in God's, you can't pick up today. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am unveiling my layers and layers of self-doubt and letting them go. Today I am taking back all the power I have given to others by discovering the courage that comes from my own wisdom. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Alcoholism is the only prison where the locks are on the inside. - Peggy M. |
December 28
Daily Reflections SUIT UP AND SHOW UP In A.A. we aim not only for sobriety - we try again to become citizens of the world that we rejected, and of the world that once rejected us. This is the ultimate demonstration toward which Twelfth Step work is the first but not the final step. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 21 The old line says, "Suit up and show up." That action is so important that I like to think of it as my motto. I can choose each day to suit up and show up, or not. Showing up at meetings starts me toward feeling a part of that meeting, I can talk with newcomers, and I can share my experience; that's what credibility, honesty, and courtesy really are. Suiting up and showing up are the concrete actions I take in my ongoing return to normal living. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day A.A. may be human in its organization, but it is divine in its purpose. The purpose is to point me toward God and the good life. My feet have been set upon the right path. I feel it in the depths of my being. I am going in the right direction. The future can be safely left to God. Whatever the future holds, it cannot be too much for me to bear. I have the Divine Power with me, to carry me through everything that may happen. Am I pointed toward God and the good life? Meditation For The Day Although unseen, the Lord is always near to those who believe in Him and trust Him and depend on Him for the strength to meet the challenges of life. Although veiled from mortal sight, the Higher Power is always available to us whenever we humbly ask for it. The feeling that God is with us should not depend on any passing mood of ours, but we should try to be always conscious of His power and love in the background of our lives. Prayer For The Day I pray that today I may feel that God is not too far away to depend on for help. I pray that I may feel confident of His readiness to give me the power that I need. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Alone No More, p.252 Alcoholism was a lonely business, even though we were surrounded by people who loved us. But when our self-will had driven everybody away and our isolation became complete, we commenced to play the big shot in cheap barrooms. Failing even in this, we had to fare forth alone on the street to depend upon the charity of passers-by. We were trying to find emotional security either by dominating or by being dependent upon others. Even when our fortunes had not totally ebbed, we nevertheless found ourselves alone in the world. We still vainly tried to be secure by some unhealthy sort of domination or dependence. For those of us who were like that, A.A. has a very special meaning. In this Fellowship we begin to learn right relations with people who understand us; we don't have to be alone any more. 12 & 12, pp. 116-117 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Rehearing Rejection Fortitude The possibility of rejection exists with almost everything we do, if we are free to choose. We might not like rejection, but we want the same freedom to reject others. As freely choosing people, we need to turn down ideas or proposals we don't like. One thing we should never do, however, is rehearse rejections before they occur. If we do this, we may give up even before we have attempted what we hope to accomplish. In effect, we will be killing our hopes even before others have a chance to review them. This is always a ticket to failure. Rejection is really a feedback mechanism that reports information we ought to have. It tells us either to change our approach or to seek acceptance elsewhere. It is not evidence that we're completely unacceptable. Our problem with any single rejection may be that it causes us to recall all the rejections we ever had. We can learn to see any rejection as a normal event that can be beneficial if we accept it properly. I'll not let any fear or visualization of rejection keep me from actions I ought to take today. I am an acceptable person, and there is a place for what I have to offer. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The human heart dares not stay away too long from that which hurt it most. There is a return journey to anguish that few of us are released from making. --Lillian Smith As the sore tooth draws our tongue, so do rejections, affronts, painful criticisms, both past and present draw our minds. We court self-pity, both loving and hating it. But we can change this pattern. First we must decide we are ready to do so. The program tells us we must become "entirely ready." And then we must ask to have this shortcoming removed. The desire to dwell on the injustices of our lives becomes habitual. It takes hours of our time. It influences our perceptions of all other experiences. We have to be willing to replace that time-consuming activity with one that's good and healthy. We must be prepared for all of life to change. Our overriding self-pity has so tarnished our perceptions that we may never have sensed all the good that life daily offers. How often we see the glass as half-empty rather than half-full! A new set of experiences awaits me today. And I can perceive them unfettered by the memories of the painful past. Self-pity need not cage me, today. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple If You Walk With Lame Men You'll soon Limp Yourself. Seaman McManus Before recovery, we kept company with people who were as sick as us, or worse. We got angry and made fun of people who were trying to improve their lives. They scared us. They were like mirrors that reflected how spiritually lost we were becoming. Now we walk in the crowd we avoided. Now we have values. We have spiritual beliefs. Living up to these values and beliefs can be hard. We need to be around people who live by their values. In recovery, we learn that we need others. Remember, the first word in Step One is we. We need good people in our lives. We need friends who will not tell us what we want to hear, but what we are doing wrong. Prayer for the Day: Sometimes I act like I need no one. Help me pick my friends wisely, for my life is at stake. Action for the Day: Today, I'll pick one friend, and we'll talk about how we can better help each other. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Your candidate may give reasons why he need not follow all of the program. He may rebel at the thought of a drastic housecleaning which requires discussion with other people. Do not contradict such views. Tell him you once felt as he does, but you doubt whether you would have made much progress had you not taken action. On your first visit tell him about the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous. If he shows interest, lend him your copy of this book. p. 94 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. When I drove up to that first meeting, though, I saw that the address I had was actually a church. As a nice Jewish boy, I was not about to wander into a church; I knew that I would not be welcome. I hid on the floorboards of the car and peeked out the window, waiting for the drunks to walk by. Everyone looked normal, so I figured I might be in the wrong place. I was about to leave, but then I saw a drinking buddy of mine go by. I jumped out of my car and greeted him. Funny thing, but it was his first meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous also. What a coincidence! In we walked--into a world that has turned everything in my life inside out. p. 489 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." When alcoholism strikes, very unnatural situations may develop which work against marriage partnership and compatible union. If the man is affected, the wife must become the head of the house, often the breadwinner. As matters get worse, the husband becomes a sick and irresponsible child who needs to be looked after and extricated from endless scrapes and impasses. Very gradually, and usually without any realization of the fact, the wife is forced to become the mother of an erring boy. And if she had a strong maternal instinct to begin with, the situation is aggravated. Obviously not much partnership can exist under these conditions. The wife usually goes on doing the best she knows how, but meanwhile the alcoholic alternately loves and hates her maternal care. A pattern is thereby established that may take a lot of undoing later on. Nevertheless, under the influence of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, these situations are often set right.* *In adopted form, the Steps are also used by Al-Anon/Alateen Family Groups. Not a part of A.A., this worldwide fellowship consists of spouses and other relatives or friends of alcoholics (in A.A. or still drinking.) Its headquarters address is 1600 Corporate Landing Parkway, Virginia Beach, VA 23454-5617. pp. 117-118 ************************************************** ********* "When it is dark enough, you can see the stars." --Charles A. Beard "Learn from the negative as well as the positive, from the failures as well as the successes." --Jim Rohn "Write it on your heart that every day is the best day of the year." --Ralph Waldo Emerson "If you want to be listened to, you should put in time listening." --Marge Piercy "In every crisis there is a message. Crises are nature's way of forcing change--breaking down old structures, shaking loose negative habits so that something new and better can take their place." --Susan Taylor ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation HUMOR "Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him." -- Romain Gary Today I laugh at myself. Today I need to laugh at myself in order to stay sane. Today I choose not to take myself too seriously. When I tell jokes about the alcoholic, I am not belittling the person. I am making fun of the disease that nearly killed me. For me to live with the disease, I need to be able to laugh at the disease in this way I stop it from having power in my life. Also I catch something of the symptoms of the disease in the jokes: the grandiosity, arrogance, manipulation, insanity, ego, selfishness and exaggeration. The joke allows me to face reality with a smile. O God, thank You for the healing gift of humor. ************************************************** ********* "For you are my lamp, O Lord; the Lord shall enlighten my darkness." II Samuel 22:29 "Seek the Lord and His strength; seek His face evermore!" 1 Chronicles 16:11 See how great a love the Father has bestowed upon us, that we should be called children of God. 1 John 3:1 "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13 "Then you will know that I am the LORD; those who hope in me will not be disappointed." Isaiah 49:23 "Beloved, let us love one another, because love is from God; everyone who loves is born of God and knows God." 1 John 4:7 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Do not run ahead of the Lord, but walk with Him, pray for His guidance and listen to His answers. Lord, let me put Your will first in my life. Do what is right and good in the eyes of the Lord and receive the fullness of His blessings. Lord, I thank You for the gifts that I have received and ask forgiveness for all that I have done wrong. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Depression "We are no longer fighting fear anger guilt, self-pity, or depression." Basic Text pg. 26 As addicts, many of us experience depression from time to time. When we feel depressed, we may be tempted to isolate ourselves. However, if we do this, our depression may turn to despair. We can't afford to let depression lead us back to using. Instead, we try to go about the routine of our lives. We make meeting attendance and contact with our sponsor top priorities. Sharing with others about our feelings may let us know we aren't the only ones who have been depressed in recovery. Working with a newcomer can work wonders for our own state of mind. And, most importantly, prayer and meditation can help us tap the power we need to survive depression. We practice acceptance and remember that feelings like depression will unquestionably pass in time. Rather than struggle with our feelings, we accept them and ask for the strength to walk through them. Just for today: I accept that my feelings of depression won't last forever. I will talk openly about my feelings with my sponsor or another person who understands. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I'll walk where my own nature would be leading--It vexes me to choose another guide. . . . --Emily Bronte We journey across many intersections in our lives. Some may point in two directions, while others lead off in several. Our choice of direction can be difficult, especially when our friends choose a road we know to be dangerous. When this happens, we can choose to go our own way without them. If they begin to tease and taunt us about our decisions, may we remember that they are as scared as we were about their friends' reaction. We are not, after all, living for someone else. If we would be leaders, we can be assured that true leadership comes from following our own directions with confidence that it's right for us, not from fear of losing others' company. We can let others live their own lives without us, if their direction is not for us. We can walk away with pride, satisfied in the knowledge that we refused to allow other people's fears change our decisions. How have I gone my own way recently? You are reading from the book Touchstones. He is a man whom it is impossible to please, because he is never pleased with himself. --Goethe Many of us grew up trying to please our fathers and feeling we never got the approval we needed. Perhaps our fathers couldn't feel pleased with themselves. Now it is time to take stock of ourselves and ask whether we are perpetuating the pattern in our own lives. If we still feel unhappy with ourselves, we may never be satisfied with anyone else either. Spouses, children, bosses, even the parking lot attendant may receive the brunt of our self-disapproval. We don't totally change these patterns in an instant. We change them one day at a time. Today, we have before us a small piece of the future. We can begin by treating ourselves decently. Maybe we can't feel a strong sense of personal approval yet, but we can give ourselves some basic respect. We can start by remembering we have the love of God. We can affirm at least one positive thing about ourselves. After some positive reflection, we will have more to give to others. Today, I will give myself approval for at least one thing. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. The human heart dares not stay away too long from that which hurt it most. There is a return journey to anguish that few of us are released from making. --Lillian Smith As the sore tooth draws our tongue, so do rejections, affronts, painful criticisms, both past and present draw our minds. We court self-pity, both loving and hating it. But we can change this pattern. First we must decide we are ready to do so. The program tells us we must become "entirely ready." And then we must ask to have this shortcoming removed. The desire to dwell on the injustices of our lives becomes habitual. It takes hours of our time. It influences our perceptions of all other experiences. We have to be willing to replace that time-consuming activity with one that's good and healthy. We must be prepared for all of life to change. Our overriding self-pity has so tarnished our perceptions that we may never have sensed all the good that life daily offers. How often we see the glass as half-empty rather than half-full! A new set of experiences awaits me today. And I can perceive them unfettered by the memories of the painful past. Self-pity need not cage me, today. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Panic Don't panic! If panic strikes, we do not have to allow it to control our behaviors. Behaviors controlled by panic tend to be self-defeating. No matter what the situation or circumstance, panic is usually not a good foundation. No matter what the situation or circumstance, we usually have at least a moment to breathe deeply and restore our serenity and peace. We don't have to do more than we can reasonably do - ever! We don't have to do something we absolutely cannot do or cannot learn to do! This program, this healthy way of life we are seeking, is built on a foundation of peace and quiet confidence - in ourselves, in our Higher Power, in the recovery process. Do not panic. That takes us away from the path. Relax. Breathe deeply. Let peace flow through our body and mind. From this base, our Source shall supply the necessary resources. Today, I will treat panic as a separate issue that needs immediate attention. I will refuse to allow panicky thoughts and feelings to motivate me. Instead, I will let peace and trust motivate my feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. Today I am slowing down my pace. I do not have to accomplish the entire world in this day. It is one day. Today I have time to stop and smell the flowers. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Heal Yourself Infuse healing energy into yourself, into your being. For too long, we’ve been attracted to things that drain us, exhausting our body, depleting our soul. That time has passed. The world is a spa, a nature retreat, a wealth of healing resources. Pour Epsom salts and essential oils into your bath. Sit quietly by a tree or in a garden. Walk around the block in your neighborhood. Spend an afternoon in a nearby park or a day at the lake or beach. Throw stones into the river while you sit on the bank contemplating the eternal stream of life. Allow beautiful music to quietly imbue the stillness with healing instead of the pounding of your mind. Light a fire and awaken the darkened hearth to glowing flames and soothing warmth. Rise from your bed early in the morning. Open the curtains. Watch the sunrise. Feel the sunrise. Let it infuse you with its message. Let it energize you, invigorate you, fill you with life. At day’s end return to the window. Or step outside. Watch the sunset. Absorb its changing colors spreading out beyond the horizon. Feel how it changes the earth and all it touches. Pet a puppy, stroke a piece of velvet, listen to a symphony. If you can’t slow down long enough to absorb the energy the first time, do it a second and a third. Absorb revitalizing energy until you can hear your voice, hear your heart tell you what would feel good, what would bring peace, what would bring stillness and joy. Before long, doing what brings healing and joy will become as natural as it used to be to do what drains, tires, depletes, and exhausts. It isn’t enough to draw near to the light. Absorb it into you. Let it charge you and change you with its energy and its power. Healing is all around you. Wherever you are, whatever your resources, healing, energy, and joy are there. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Risk being alive “I know nothing is going to lasr forever,” Charlie said. “But the key to life and being happy is acting as though it is.” Many of us have had our illusions about security and permanency shattered. The longer we’re alive, the more it gets beat into us: nothing is forever. We can plan on many things, but the only thing we can plan on with any certainty is change. At some time in our lives, we may have convinced ourselves otherwise. We surrendered ourselves to that job, that project, or that relationship with all our hearts, only to have it crash to an end. Some of us may have decided, after enough cycles of beginnings, middles, and endings, that the way to deal with this was never to fully give our hearts to any person or circumstance, never to let ourselves fully be present and enjoy the moment. If I don’t get in completely, I won’t get hurt when it ends, we think. Maybe. But you won’t experience the pleasure and joy, the rich, sweet full taste of those moments, either. Okay, so you’re wiser now. You know nothing lasts forever. You know the moment something happens, the ending has already been written,too. People are born. They die. A job or project begins. Then it ends. But there’s an entire luscious middle waiting, inviting you to jump in fully and see how sweet life can be. Besides, when the ending does come, you’ll also have been given enough wisdom, courage, and grace to deal with that,too. What are you waiting for? Go ahead. Stop holding back. Jump in. Live your life. God, give me enough faith and a well of letting go so I can live each moment fully. *************************************** Useful Transformation Make Change Work for You by Madisyn Taylor When we experience change in our life we can control our response and reaction to the changes that are happening. Transformation is a universal constant that affects our lives from the moment we are born until we leave earthly existence behind. At the root of all growth, we find change. Occasionally, change and the circumstances leading up to it are a source of extraordinary joy, but more often than not they provoke feelings of discomfort, fear, or pain. Though many changes are unavoidable, we should not believe that we are subject to the whims of an unpredictable universe. It is our response to those circumstances that will dictate the nature of our experiences. At the heart of every transformation, no matter how chaotic, there is substance. When we no longer resist change and instead regard it as an opportunity to grow, we find that we are far from helpless in the face of it. Our role as masters of our own destinies is cemented when we choose to make change work in our favor. Yet before we can truly internalize this power, we must accept that we cannot hide from the changes taking place all around us. Existence as we know it will come to an end at one or more points in our lives, making way for some new and perhaps unexpected mode of being. This transformation will take place whether or not we want it to, and so it is up to us to decide whether we will open our eyes to the blessings hidden amidst disorder or close ourselves off from opportunities hiding behind obstacles. To make change work for you, look constructively at your situation and ask yourself how you can benefit from the transformation that has taken place. As threatening as change can seem, it is often a sign that a new era of your life has begun. If you reevaluate your plans and goals in the days or weeks following a major change, you will discover that you can adapt your ambition to the circumstances before you and even capitalize on these changes. Optimism, enthusiasm, and flexibility will aid you greatly here, as there is nothing to be gained by dwelling on what might have been. Change can hurt in the short term but, if you are willing to embrace it proactively, its lasting impact will nearly always be physically, spiritually, and intellectually transformative. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Program, for me, is not a place nor a philosophy, but a highway to freedom. The highway leads me toward the goal of a “spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps.” The highway doesn’t get me to the goal as quickly as I some wish, but I try to remember that God and I work from different timetables. But the goal is there, and I know that the Twelve Steps will help me reach it. Have I come to the realization that I — and anyone — can now do what I had always thought impossible? Today I Pray As I live The Program, may I realize more and more that it is a means to an end rather than an end in itself. May I keep in mind that the mind of spirituality it calls for is never complete, but is the essence of change and growth, a drawing nearer to an ideal state. May I be wary of setting time-oriented goals for myself to measure my spiritual progress. Today I Will Remember Timetables are human inventions. *************************************** One More Day Sadness flies away on the wings of time. – Jean De La Fontaine When we’re sad, it’s hard to believe that time will heal all our wounds. An old family-practice doctor used to call it the TOT Treatment — Tincture of Time. Our sadness may be due to a change in living patterns or even in the weather. It might be due to loss of a loved one, of good health, or even of a cherished object. And our grief takes time. Whatever the reason for our sadness, after a self-imposed period of time alone, we begin to venture out once again into our world. We work our way, ever so slowly, back into some pattern of normalcy. TOT has done it’s work once again. Laughter surfaces, and we know we have put enough time and space between us and our sadness. We are whole again. A time of sadness is natural, just as natural as the rediscovered joy that follows it. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~MEDITATION~ God is the mirror of silence in which all creation is reflected. Paramahansa Yogananda The disease of compulsive overeating is a devious one. It tries to tell me that I'm not a worthwhile person. It tries to tell me that I'm never going to recover, so I may as well eat. The disease tries to make me feel like I'm the lowest of the low. Fortunately, there are many things in this recovery program that counteract the disease. I can use a food plan to make sure I don't eat what I'm not supposed to eat. I can read program literature to show me how to live triumphantly. I can work the Steps, do service, make outreach calls; there's so much I can do which can bring recovery from compulsive overeating. Another of the things I can do to counteract my disease is meditation. When I meditate, I come into conscious contact with my Higher Power. Meditation helps me to see that I am a worthwhile person, that God loves me just as I am. When I meditate I gain insights into the program literature I'm reading, I learn the things I need to do to further my recovery. I also learn the things that stifle my growth, so I can stop doing them. Meditation is very important to my recovery program. One Day at a Time . . . I remember the importance of meditation, and I meditate every day. Jeff ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Here is the fellow who has been puzzling you, especially in his lack of control. He does absurd, incredible, tragic things while drinking. He is a real Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. He is seldom mildly drunk. His disposition while drinking resembles his normal nature but little. He may be one of the finest fellows in the world. Yet let him drink for a day, and he frequently becomes disgustingly, and even dangerously anti-social. He has a positive genius for getting tight at exactly the wrong moment, particularly when some important decision must be made or engagement kept. He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly dishonest and selfish. He often possesses special abilities, skills, and aptitudes, and has a promising career ahead of him. He uses his gifts to build up a bright outlook for his family and himself, and then pulls the structure down on his head by a senseless series of sprees. - Pg. 21 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Our 12 steps are dedicated primarily to the cultivation of principle in the befuddled addict's mind. Spiritual soundness leads to mental soundness. Even though we don't understand the process of our program to stop our cravings, we must trust that IT WORKS. I look at those around me, at their success and know that this process WORKS even if it isn't clear how. Self Importance I will get my mind off of the treadmill. There is more to life than my worries and obsessions. Just for today I won't give every little thing more importance than it deserves. In the scheme of things, all of my petty annoyances aren't all that important. I don't have to take them so seriously that they disturb my inner peace. When I am constantly preoccupies with all that's wrong, I forget to remember all that's right. Self importance is different from valuing myself. Self importance gets me tied up in mental knots, valuing myself is nourishing and loving. I will get out of my own way today - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The reason people blame other people is because there is only one alternative. I do not point a finger at another because there are always three pointing back at me. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book When you look in the mirror, you are looking at the problem, but, remember, you are also looking at the solution. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am slowing down my pace. I do not have to accomplish the entire world in this day. It is one day. Today I have time to stop and smell the flowers. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote When in deep water; become a diver. - Unknown origin. |
December 29
Daily Reflections THE JOY OF LIVING . . . . therefore the joy of good living is the theme of A.A.'s Twelfth Step. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 125 A.A. is a joyful program! Even so, I occasionally balk at taking the necessary steps to move ahead, and find myself resisting the very actions that could bring about the joy I want. I would not resist if those actions did not touch some vulnerable area of my life, an area that needs hope and fulfillment. Repeated exposure to joyfulness has a way of softening the hard, outer edges of my ego. Therein lies the power of joyfulness to help all members of A.A. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Participating in the privileges of the movement, I shall share in the responsibilities, taking it upon myself to carry my fair share of the load, not grudgingly but joyfully. I am deeply grateful for the privileges I enjoy because of my membership in this great movement. They put an obligation upon me which I will not shirk. I will gladly carry my fair share of the burdens. Because of the joy of doing them, they will no longer be burdens, but opportunities. Will I accept every opportunity gladly? Meditation For The Day Work and prayer are the two forces which are gradually making a better world. We must work for the betterment of ourselves and our fellow men. Faith without works is dead. But all work with people should be based on prayer. If we say a little prayer before we speak or try to help, it will make us more effective. Prayer is the force behind the work. Prayer is based on faith that God is working with us and through us. We can believe that nothing is impossible in human relationships, if we depend on the help of God. Prayer For The Day I pray that my life may be balanced between prayer and work. I pray that I may not work without prayer or pray without work. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Unlimited Choice, p. 201 Any number of alcoholics are bedeviled by the dire conviction that if they ever go near A.A. they will be pressured to conform to some particular brand of faith or theology. They just don't realize that faith is never an imperative for A.A. membership. That sobriety can be achieved with an easily acceptable minimum of it, and that our concepts of a Higher Power and God--as we understand Him--afford everyone a nearly unlimited choice of spiritual belief and action. ******************************** In talking to a prospect, stress the spiritual feature freely. If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that he does not have to agree with your conception of God. He can choose any conception he likes, provided it makes sense to him. The main thing is that he is willing to believe in a Power greater than himself and that he live by spiritual principles. 1. Grapevine, April 1961 2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 93 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Mending the past No Regrets of the Past "The past is best mended by living so fully today that its errors have no place in our lives." These words by an AA member suggest an approach for healing from the past. All of us would benefit to use today's knowledge to deal with situations we mishandled in the past. But we must remember that whatever mistakes we made, we had available only the knowledge and resources we possessed the, and we may have done about as well as we possibly could at this time. We should also remember that active alcoholism is a crippling and ugly disease with many terrible consequences. It's not surprising that bad things happened to others and us when we were drinking. We can only be grateful that we are now recovering and that matters are better, not worse, than they once were. I'll live fully today, allowing no thoughts of regret from my past to intrude. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Many people are living in an emotional jail without recognizing it. Virginia Satir. Our disease was our jail. We felt so bad that we were sure we must have done something awful. But we didn't cause our disease. We have done nothing to deserve our disease. We aren't responsible for the fact that we have a disease. But we ARE responsible for our recovery. We have been granted probation. The terms of our probation are simple: don't drink or use other drugs, and work the Steps. If we follow these simple rules, we'll be free. And it will be clear to us that only a Power greater than ourselves could give us this freedom. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to stay free. For this next twenty-four - hour period, take from me any urge to drink or use other drugs. With Your help, I'll be free. Action for the Day: Today, I'll think about my disease. I am not morally weak. I have a dangerous illness. What can keep me free from my disease? ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Kindness and intelligence don't always deliver us from the pitfalls and traps. There is no way to take the danger out of human relationships. --Barbara Grizzuti Harrison Relationships with other people are necessary to escape loneliness; however, relationships do not guarantee freedom from pain. Nurturing a meaningful relationship with another human being takes patience, even when we don't have any. It takes tolerance, even if we don't feel it. It takes selflessness, at those very moments our own ego is crying for attention. Yet, we need relationships with others; they inspire us. We learn who we are and who we can become through relationships. They precipitate our accomplishments. Our creativity is encouraged by them, and so is our emotional and spiritual development. We can look around us, attentively. We can feel blessed, even when it's a negative situation. Every situation is capable of inspiring a positive step forward. Every situation is meant for our good. There's risk in human relationships, and it's often accompanied by pain. But I am guaranteed growth, and I will find the happiness I seek. I will reach out to someone today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS Unless your friend wants to talk further about himself, do not wear out your welcome. Give him a chance to think it over. If you do stay, let him steer the conversation in any direction he like. Sometimes a new man is anxious to proceed at once, and you may be tempted to let him do so. This is sometimes a mistake. If he has trouble later, he is likely to say you rushed him. You will be most successful with alcoholics if you do not exhibit any passion for crusade or reform. Never talk down to an alcoholic from any moral or spiritual hilltop; simply lay out the kit of spiritual tools for his inspection. Show him how they worked with you. Offer him friendship and fellowship. Tell him that if he wants to get well you will do anything to help. p. 95 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. I didn't like A.A. and the people in it for a long time. I didn't trust anyone, and I got tired of sitting at meetings listening to other newcomers as they began to talk of finding God, having their families return to them, being treated with respect by society, and finding some peace of mind. It never occurred to me that they had sponsors and were working the Twelve Steps of recovery. I had what I now call "a sponsor of the month." I always had a sponsor but whenever one of them would "lovingly suggest" I do something, I would fire them and move on to someone else. I remained angry, bitter, and isolated, even though I was going to five to six A.A. meetings per week and was not drinking. At seven months sober I was getting a little bored with A.A. and began to wonder if this was all there was to life. The concept of not drinking again seemed a little extreme, and I thought that perhaps it would be different this time. pp. 489-490 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." When the distortion has been great, however, a long period of patient striving may be necessary. After the husband joins A.A., the wife may become discontented, even highly resentful that Alcoholics Anonymous has done the very thing that all her years of devotion had failed to do. Her husband may become so wrapped up in A.A. and his new friends that he is inconsiderately away from home more than when he drank. Seeing her unhappiness, he recommends A.A.'s Twelve Steps and tries to teach her how to live. She naturally feels that for years she has made a far better job of living than he has. Both of them blame each other and ask when their marriage is ever going to be happy again. They may even begin to suspect it had never been any good in the first place. pp. 118-119 ************************************************** ********* Keep your sobriety first to make it last. --unknown Having the world's best idea will do you no good unless you act on it. People who want milk shouldn't sit on a stool in the middle of a field in hopes that a cow will back up to them. --Curtis Grant When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. It's easier to eat crow while it's still warm. --Sherrie R. "When nobody around you measures up, it's time to check your yardstick." --Bill Lemly Without God's inner source of enlightenment and refreshment, I would soon stagnate and feel despair. --Shelley The heart of AA is the act of one person giving to another. ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation MADNESS "The madman who knows that he is mad is close to sanity." -- Juan Ruiz de Alarcon An alcoholic who continues to drink is committing suicide. An addict who continues to use is committing suicide. An overeater who continues to eat compulsively and destructively is committing suicide. Madness. It is like a man standing in the town square stabbing himself with a knife and asking the passer-by, "Why am I bleeding?" Today I accept my past destructive behavior and try to change it on a daily basis. Spirituality is loving yourself enough to "see" the writing on the wall and do something about it. Change is sanity for the madman! God, You seem to have given me a dose of insanity. Let me use it to Your glory. ************************************************** ********* "Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me." Revelation 3:20 Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself. Philippians 2:3 "Who are you to judge the servant of another? To his own master he stands or falls; and stand he will, for the Lord is able to make him stand." Romans 14:4 "The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." Zephaniah 3:17 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Today picture yourself as the happiest person that you know and watch how contagious this enthusiasm for life is. Lord, may I bring out the best in those with whom I share today so they can in turn bring out more of my best. Choose God instead of choosing to worry. Lord, in Your justice, rescue and deliver me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Through Others' Eyes "When someone points out a shortcoming, our first reaction may be defensive....[But] if we truly want to be free, we will take a good look at input from fellow addicts." Basic Text pg. 35 At some point in our recovery, we come to the awkward realization that the way we see ourselves is not necessarily the way others do. We are probably neither as bad, as good, as beautiful, or as ugly as we think we are - but we are too close to ourselves to really tell for sure. That's where our friends in the program come in, caring enough to share with us what they see when they look in our direction. They tell us the good things about ourselves we might not know - and they tell us the hard things, too, that we might not be able to see. We may react defensively to such "help" and, in some cases, justly so. However, even malicious remarks about our supposed shortcomings can shed light on aspects of our recovery that we cannot see ourselves. Wherever a useful insight comes from, for whatever reason it is offered, we cannot afford to discount it. We don't need to wait for others to spontaneously offer their insight. When we spend time with our sponsor or other NA members we trust, we can make the first move and ask them to tell us what they see about particular areas of our lives to which we are blind. We want a broader vision of our life than just our own; we can have that vision by seeing ourselves through the eyes of others. Just for today: I seek to see myself as I truly am. I will listen to what others say about me, and see myself through their eyes. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. The price of dishonesty is self-destruction. --Rita Mae Brown There once was a woman who told her husband what she thought he wanted to hear. She told him she was happy when she wasn't. She told him she liked his friends when she didn't. She tried to figure out what he wanted so she could do it for him. She felt hurt when he didn't do the same for her. She felt he should also try to read her mind and do what she wanted without her having to express it. She was scared to tell him how she really felt. However, her pain and resentment grew so much she couldn't stand it any longer, so she told him her true feelings. He was so used to hearing her lies that he called her a liar when she told the truth. Now she knew how much she had hurt herself by trying to please him at the cost of her own honesty and needs. Honesty is necessary for a good relationship with anyone. When we lie to ourselves, we cannot tell the truth to others. By being honest, we open our doors to others, we trust them with our true feelings, and they love us for who we really are. Who can I tell how I really feel today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Our greatest glory consists not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. --Ralph Waldo Emerson After we get a new understanding about ourselves we think, "Now I will never have to make the same mistake again!" But our lessons are usually not that easily learned. We have to get them into our muscles and bones as well as our heads. Some of us have to learn how to be kind; others, how to be good listeners or how to stand up for ourselves in many different ways. Every new situation calls on a little different way of knowing, and perhaps we have to fall a few times in the learning. The most important asset in our lives is the faith to get up again and continue. We must accept our imperfections. Each time we fall and with each mistake we make, we're vulnerable to doubting and losing faith. By rising again, we make progress in our learning and continue to become better men. Today, I will have faith, even in the midst of my mistakes. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Kindness and intelligence don't always deliver us from the pitfalls and traps. There is no way to take the danger out of human relationships. --Barbara Grizzuti Harrison Relationships with other people are necessary to escape loneliness; however, relationships do not guarantee freedom from pain. Nurturing a meaningful relationship with another human being takes patience, even when we don't have any. It takes tolerance, even if we don't feel it. It takes selflessness, at those very moments our own ego is crying for attention. Yet, we need relationships with others; they inspire us. We learn who we are and who we can become through relationships. They precipitate our accomplishments. Our creativity is encouraged by them, and so is our emotional and spiritual development. We can look around us, attentively. We can feel blessed, even when it's a negative situation. Every situation is capable of inspiring a positive step forward. Every situation is meant for our good. There's risk in human relationships, and it's often accompanied by pain. But I am guaranteed growth, and I will find the happiness I seek. I will reach out to someone today. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Moving On Learn the art of acceptance. It's a lot of grief. --Codependent No More Sometimes, as part of taking care of ourselves, it becomes time to end certain relationships. Sometimes, it comes time to change the parameters of a particular relationship. This is true in love, in friendships, with family, and on the job. Endings and changes in relationships are not easy. But often, they are necessary. Sometimes, we linger in relationships that are dead, out of fear of being alone or to postpone the inevitable grieving process that accompanies endings. Sometimes, we need to linger for a while, to prepare ourselves, to get strong and ready enough to handle the change. If that is what we are doing, we can be gentle with ourselves. It is better to wait until that moment when it feels solid, clear, and consistent to act. We will know. We will know. We can trust ourselves. Knowing that a relationship is changing or is about to end is a difficult place to be in, especially when it is not yet time to act but we know the time is drawing near. It can be awkward and uncomfortable, as the lesson draws to a close. We may become impatient to put closure on it, but not yet feel empowered to do that. That's okay. The time is not yet right. Something important is still happening. When the time is right, we can trust that it will happen. We will receive the power and the ability to do what we need to do. Ending relationships or changing the boundaries of a particular relationship is not easy. It requires courage and faith. It requires a willingness on our part to take care of ourselves and, sometimes, to stand-alone for a while. Let go of fear. Understand that change is an important part of recovery. Love yourself enough to do what you need to do to take care of yourself, and find enough confidence to believe that you will love again. We are never starting over. In recovery, we are moving forward in a perfectly planned progression of lessons. We will find ourselves with certain people - in love, family, friendships, and work - when we need to be with them. When the lesson has been mastered, we will move on. We will find ourselves in a new place, learning new lessons, with new people. No, the lessons are not all painful. We will arrive at that place where we can learn, not from pain, but from joy and love. Our needs will get met. Today, I will accept where I am in my relationships, even if that place is awkward and uncomfortable. If I am in the midst of endings, I will face and accept my grief. God, help me trust that the path I am on has been perfectly and lovingly planned for me. Help me believe that my relationships are teaching me important lessons. Help me accept and be grateful for middles, endings, and new beginnings. Through prayer and meditation God guides me to the appropriate people for guidance in the important decisions I must make in my life. I trust my answers to be there when the time is right. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Experience the Thrill of the Climb Don’t stop now. You’re almost there. You’ve worked so hard to climb this mountain. In the beginning, you were excited. Exhilarated at the prospect of the mountain you were about to climb. Now you are almost to the top. You’ve struggled, gotten weary, and kept going. Now, your goal is in sight. Keep going. Guidance is still there to help you. The life force, the one that keeps you going, keeps you moving forward, is still there too, burning brightly within you, charging all that you do with its energy. It is more difficult for you to feel it, but that is only because you’re tired. See the mountain climber as he climbs the mountain. There are dangers and precipices and challenges along the way. But the higher he climbs, the steeper it gets. The more tired he is, the more energy he has to put into the climb. Don’t tell yourself that the way you feel is an indication you should stop. The way you feel now is the way anyone would feel who was so deeply committed to life. It’s the way anyone would feel who had committed to climbing that mountain. Don’t stop now. Relax as much as you can. Knowing that the rhythm of life is still there, moving you forward. Don’t look back. Focus intently on each step. Soon you will reach the top. Soon you will reach your goal. Soon you will experience the victory. Keep your eyes focused on the path, look straight ahead. Embrace the thrill of the climb. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Let the adventure consume you The spirit of adventure settles over us slowly sometimes. In the beginning, when those old winds of change blow, we turn our backs, fight, and resist. We just want things to stay the same. Gradually we let go of the need to control. We allow things to change and us to change with them. We accept the change. Then we round the corner and find a wonderful lesson there, and then another, and another. Soon we find ourselves looking forward to taking the next step, anxious to see what lies in front of us today. Where will my path lead? Who will I meet? What will I learn? What wonderful lesson is taking place right now? And the adventure begins to consume us. The steps that you have been taking have been slowly leading you down a path with more wonder and goodness at every turn of the road. You learned to tolerate change. Now learn to embrace it. Adventure isn’t something you do. The adventure is your life. Recognize how sweet it is. Let those winds of change blow. God, help me cultivate a spirit of adventure in my life. *************************************** A Self-Created State Worry We have all had the experience of worrying about something at some point in our lives. Some of us have a habitual tendency to worry, and all of us have known someone who is a chronic worrier. Worry is an extension of fear and can be a very draining experience. In order for worry to exist, we have to imagine that something bad might happen. What we are worrying about has not happened yet, however, so this bad thing is by definition a fantasy. Understood this way, worry is a self-created state of needless fear. Still, most of us worry. One reason we worry is because we feel like we’re not in control. For example, you might worry about your loved ones driving home in bad weather. There is nothing you can do to guarantee their safe passage, but you worry until you find out they have reached their destination unharmed. In this instance, worry is an attempt to feel useful and in control. However, worrying does nothing to ensure a positive outcome and it has an unpleasant effect on your body, mind, and spirit. The good news is that there are ways to transform this kind of worry so that it has a healing effect. Just as worry uses the imagination, so does the antidote to worry. Next time you find that you are worrying, imagine the best result instead of anticipating the worst outcome. Visualize your loved ones’ path bathed in white light and clearly see in your mind’s eye their safe arrival. Imagine angels or guides watching over them as they make their way home. Generate peace and well-being instead of nervousn! ess and unease within yourself. Another reason we worry is that something that we know is pending but are avoiding is nagging us—an unpaid parking ticket, an upcoming test, an issue with a friend. In these cases, acknowledging that we are worried and taking action is the best solution. If you can confront the situation and own your power to change it, you’ll have no reason to worry. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The success of The Program, i’ve been taught, lies in large measure in the readiness and willingness of its members to go to any lengths to help others tyrannized by their addictions. If my readiness and willingness cools, then I stand in danger of losing all that I’ve gained. I must never become unwilling to give away what I have, for only by so doing will I be privileged to keep it. Do I take to heart the saying, “Out of self into God into others…”? Today I Pray May I never be too busy to answer a fellow addict’s call for help. May I never become so wound up in my pursuits that I forget that my own continuing recovery depends on that helping — a half-hour or so on the telephone, a call in person, a lunch date, whatever the situation calls for. May I know what my priorities must be. Today I Will Remember Helping helps me. *************************************** One More Day The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. – Jack London We are on a remarkable journey that holds wonderful possibilities. Sometimes people who have undergone a crisis think they have arrived at the end of the journey. The excitement of living decreases each day. Surrounding ourselves with loving, caring people gives us the greatest chance of coming out of the depression caused by our problems. Also, treating ourselves gently can improve our outlook. When we show loving care for others and ourselves, we will once again be moving back into the mainstream of life. We will be filled once again with the excitement and joy of the journey that lies ahead. I owe myself the excitement of each day to come. Today, I will savor my life. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~GRATITUDE FOR ADVERSITY ~ He was my greatest teacher. He taught me patience. The Dalai Lama on Mao Tse Tung Whenever I feel downtrodden or disappointed by the hand that life has dealt me, I often think of this quote. It moves me beyond speech. Here was a man who had lost his homeland to communist China, yet he still had a good thing to say about the man who started it all. It forces me to come to a realization that what has happened to me is peanuts! Too often I am caught up with feeling sorry for myself because of my disease, while ignoring the fact that I am so fortunate to have found recovery. Sometimes I feel so poor, yet I live in a large home with a wonderful spouse and delightful pets. I have a car, and enough food to eat every day. I have the luxury of obtaining my degree. Most of all, though I often complain about how unfair it all is, I am even fortunate to have an eating disorder. Because it is through admitting I have a problem that I am beginning to taste recovery, and it is sweeter than any binge item. And it has taught me that it is through our adversities that we learn compassion and patience. I have to realize that life just isn't fair. If it were, how boring it would be! Nothing worthwhile is easy to obtain, and that includes recovery. What would it be worth if there was no effort going into it? Sometimes bad things happen, and they are unfortunate. But that's the end of it. I cannot make things be the way I want them to be. I cannot change life. I must accept life on life's terms, and learn the art of patience, so well demonstrated by the above quote. How fortunate that I have the opportunity to learn these precious skills in the safety and security of my own home, with my wonderful friends, spouse, and my program family! One Day at a Time . . . I will avoid dwelling on the misery that accompanies hardship. I will develop the willingness to be grateful for the opportunity for me to learn compassion and patience. Claire ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote However intelligent we may have been in other respects, where alcohol has been involved, we have been strangely insane. It's strong language - but isn't it true? - Pg. 38 - More About Alcoholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote You will probably misjudge and misunderstand many people and their motives for a time. The muddled thinking of early recovery has a way of making us take things the wrong way. Remember your vulnerability and that withdrawal distorts thinking. Don't be hard on yourself or those around you. Do nothing permanent for eight months to a year. This way your regrets will be minimized. God, as I understand You, hold my tongue from uttering words and restrain my steps from moving in directions that I may one day regret. Body Memories Understanding and thought are distributed throughout all the cells in my body. Who I am is stored in my physical self. My body carries memory and knowledge about how I have responded to the circumstances of my life, about what I brought into this world to begin with.. Today when I think positively, I will allow and invite my entire body to carry a positive thought. I will instruct each cell within me to be active, healthy and vibrant. Each time that I feel I am getting low on reserves, I will open all of my body to receiving uplifting light and energy from the universe. I am not a talking head. I am a body, mind and spirit, alive in all of me. I ask my body to wake up and live. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote If you are clean and sober, the miracle has already happened. Stick around, the impossibilities take a little longer. Nothing is impossible in God's world. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Prevent truth decay-read your Big Book. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Through prayer and meditation God guides me to the appropriate people for guidance in the important decisions I must make in my life. I trust my answers to be there when the time is right. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Give me your hand o brother mine and even I may help you up. - Henry Lawson. |
December 30
Daily Reflections ANONYMITY Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 564 Tradition Twelve became important early in my sobriety and, along with the Twelve Steps, it continues to be a must in my recovery. I became aware after I joined the Fellowship that I had personality problems, so that when I first heard it, the Tradition's message was very clear: there exists an immediate way for me to face, with others, my alcoholism and attendant anger, defensiveness, offensiveness. I saw Tradition Twelve as being a great ego-deflator; it relieved my anger and gave me a chance to utilize the principles of the program. All of the Steps, and this particular Tradition, have guided me over decades of continuous sobriety. I am grateful to those who were here when I needed them. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day To the extent that I fail in my responsibilities, A.A. fails. To the extent that I succeed, A.A. succeeds. Every failure of mine will set back A.A. work to that extent. Every success of mine will put A.A. ahead to that extent. I shall not wait to be drafted for service to others, but I shall volunteer. I shall accept every opportunity to work for A.A. as a challenge, and I shall do my best to accept every challenge and perform my task as best I can. Will I accept every challenge gladly? Meditation For The Day People are always failures in the deepest sense when they seek to live without God's sustaining power. Many people try to be self-sufficient and seek selfish pleasure and find that it does not work too well. No matter how much material wealth they acquire, no matter how much fame and material power, the time of disillusionment and futility usually comes. Death is ahead, and they cannot take any material thing with them when they go. What does it matter if I have gained the whole world, but lost my own soul? Prayer For The Day I pray that I will not come empty to the end of my life. I pray that I may so live that I will not be afraid to die. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It We Cannot Stand Still, p. 25 In the first days of A.A., I wasn't much bothered about the areas of life in which I was standing still. There was always the alibi: "After all," I said to myself, "I'm far too busy with much more important matters." That was my near perfect prescription for comfort and complacency. << << << >> >> >> How many of us would presume to declare, "Well, Im sober and I'm happy. What more can I want, or do? I'm fine the way I am." We know that the price of such self-satisfaction is an inevitable backslide, punctuated at some point by a very rude awakening. We have to grow or else deteriorate. For us, the status quo can only be today, never for tomorrow. Change we must; we cannot stand still. 1. Grapevine, June 1961 2. Grapevine, February 1961 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Maturity means principles Right Action A principle is sometimes defined as a fundamental guide to action. The more mature we become, the more likely it is that we'll work from principles rather than blind feelings. The principles outlined in the Twelve Steps are good guide for mature living. They call for honesty in motive, fair and considerate treatment of others, and reliance on our Higher Power throughout each day. As we continue on such a path, we will outgrow the childish selfishness and reactions that were so destructive in our old lives. We will be viewed by others as mature, responsible, reliable people. We also grow into maturity by acting according to sound principles even when we don't always feel like it. Whatever our feelings might be at any given moment, we can choose actions that are sound and constructive. Whatever my feelings might be from moment to moment, I"ll act according to the best principles today. I know this is a part of growing up. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Keep It Simple.---AA slogan Addiction messed up our thinking. We know that from taking Step One. We forgot things. We had blackouts. We made excuses, and we even started to believe them. We were mixed up. We couldn't figure things out. We decided to get high and forget about it. Now our minds are clear. We can keep thinking clearly if we work our program and Keep It Simple. Don't drink or use other drugs. Go to meetings. Work the Steps. Be yourself. Ask for help. Trust your Higher Power. Two thoughts will always mess us up if we let them in. They are "Yes, but..." and "What if?" Don't let them in. Keep It Simple. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thanks for recovery. Help me stay sober and clean today. Action for the Day: Today, I'll take one thing at a time and Keep It Simple. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning And what a delight it is to make friends with someone you have despised! --Colette What does it mean to say we "despise" someone? Usually it means that we have invested a lot of energy in negative feelings; it means that we have let ourselves care deeply about someone. We would never say we "despised" someone who wasn't important to us. Why have we chosen to let negative feelings occupy so much of our hearts? Sometimes, in the past, that negative energy has become almost an obsession, consuming our time, gnawing at our self-esteem. But in recovery there comes a moment of lightning change; a moment of release from the bonds of obsession. The other person is, after all, just another person--a seeker, like ourselves. And, since we cared enough to devote our time and energies to disliking her, she is probably someone who would be rewarding to know. Recovery has given us the opportunity to turn over many negative feelings, to discover that "friend" and "enemy" can be two sides of the same person. Today, I will look into my heart and see whether I am clinging to obsessive concerns with other people. I will resolve to let them go. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS If he is not interested in your solution, if he expects you to act only as a banker for his financial difficulties or a nurse for his sprees, you may have to drop him until he changes his mind. This he may do after he gets hurt some more. p. 95 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. Then something happened that I now believe helped me to stay sober and find my Higher Power. I woke up one morning and couldn't feel my legs. I could still walk with a little difficulty, but it got worse as time passed. Several months and lots of medical examinations, doctors, hospital visits, and tests later, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. The path since then has been quite a journey. I now either walk with crutches or use a wheelchair. There have been lots of times I wanted and intended to drink again. During my second year of sobriety, I slowly became angrier and angrier. I was in what one of my sponsors now refers to as "the angry years." I was one of those people we see at meetings and wonder how they stay sober. p. 490 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." Compatibility, of course, can be so impossibly damaged that a separation may be necessary. But those cases are the unusual ones. The alcoholic, realizing what his wife has endured, and now fully understanding how much he himself did to damage her and his children, nearly always takes up his marriage responsibilities with a willingness to repair what he can and to accept what he can't. He persistently tries all of A.A.'s Twelve Steps in his home, often with fine results. At this point he firmly but lovingly commences to behave like a partner instead of like a bad boy. And above all he is finally convinced that reckless romancing is not a way of life for him. p. 119 ************************************************** ********* Don't hate - it's too big a burden to bear. --Martin Luther King, Sr. Never be afraid to entrust the unknown future to the all-knowing God." --unknown "We may not know what the future holds, but we know who holds the future." --unknown God can make all things new, even you. --unknown When you find you are upset over a situation, stop and ask yourself one very important question. "Is this something I can change?" Whether it is or not, turn your negative energy in to productive energy. You can either change the situation, or change your perspective of the situation. --unknown You can preach a better sermon with your life than with your lips. --Oliver Goldsmith You cannot raise a man up by calling him down. --William Boetcker Don't let yesterday use up too much of today. --Will Rogers ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation BALANCE "A society that gives to one class all the opportunities for leisure, and to another class all the burdens of work, dooms both classes to spiritual sterility." -- Lewis Mumford Spirituality brings with it balance. In order to be relaxed, healthy and alive, I need both work and leisure. For me I need to remember it is okay to take a day off; to stay in and relax is not a waste; play time is creative time! I was not only compulsive around alcohol and people but I was also obsessive about work. I was and am a work-aholic. I need to remember to H.A.L.T.: Don't get too Hungry. Don't get too Angry. Don't get too Lonely. Don't get too Tired. Work for me can be a form of escape. In leisure I have the opportunity to meet with myself. Go on enjoy yourself, with yourself! You, who made me a laborer in the vineyard, also expected me to sit and enjoy it. ************************************************** ********* "I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand." Isaiah 41:10 "Do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. Hebrews 12:1-3 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Begin every day as if it were your very first because you really are always at the beginning. Lord, thank you for the constant ability to stop any offensive behaviors that I have and the gift of being forgiven and being able to forgive myself. Imagine that you were paid for every kindness and charged for every unkindness. Would you be rich or poor? Lord, I often pray for material wealth. Let me not neglect my soul by now praying for the ability to build my spiritual wealth also. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Action And Prayer "... growth is not the result of wishing but of action and prayer" Basic Text, pp. 35-36 Sometimes it seems as if our recovery is growing much too slowly. We struggle with the steps; we wrestle with the same problems; we labor under the same uncomfortable feelings day after day. We wish that recovery would move a little faster so we could find some comfort! Wishing doesn't work in recovery; this isn't a program of magic. If wishes cured addiction, we all would have been well long ago! What does give us relief in recovery is action and prayer. Narcotics Anonymous has worked for so many addicts because it is a carefully designed program of action and prayer. The actions we undertake in each of the steps bring more and more recovery to each area of our lives. And prayer keeps us connected to our Higher Power. Together, action and prayer keep us well-grounded in recovery. Just for today: My recovery is too precious to just wish about it. Today is a good day for action and prayer. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Telling the truth is a pretty hard thing. --Thomas Wolfe Lying can be like sailing choppy waters. The more we lie, the higher the waves get, and the harder the sailing. When we lie, we feel we've failed ourselves and others. We have to work hard to cover up our lies, and the fear of someone finding out is always with us. If we ask God for courage to tell the truth, we can be like the sailboat on a clear and calm day. We can enjoy the small waves and the light warm breeze we've given ourselves. Honesty is a good habit, and is easy. With a little faith in our own worth, we can choose the calm waters' honesty and apply our creativity to new, growth-oriented activities instead of covering up old mistakes. How can I smooth my waters right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. When we are reduced to our last extreme, there is no further evasion. The choice is a terrible one. It is made in the heart of darkness ... when we who have been destroyed and seem to be in hell miraculously choose God! --Thomas Merton There are many ways we benefit from a life crisis. Perhaps none of us could achieve true adult maturity - or a relationship with God - without having the foundations of our lives shaken. One of our pathways to crisis was the willful pursuit of control in our codependent and addictive lives. Our lifestyles were extreme, the consequences were extreme, and our surrender had to be absolute. Most of us are surprised by how our weaknesses can turn to strengths. When our defiant wills led us to the utter bottom of our despair, we finally turned to a Power greater than ourselves and found a new way to live. This spiritual story is told in endless variations in our meetings, and it is renewed in small ways every day in each of our lives. God, lift my defiant willfulness from me and renew my day. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. And what a delight it is to make friends with someone you have despised! --Colette What does it mean to say we "despise" someone? Usually it means that we have invested a lot of energy in negative feelings; it means that we have let ourselves care deeply about someone. We would never say we "despised" someone who wasn't important to us. Why have we chosen to let negative feelings occupy so much of our hearts? Sometimes, in the past, that negative energy has become almost an obsession, consuming our time, gnawing at our self-esteem. But in recovery there comes a moment of lightning change; a moment of release from the bonds of obsession. The other person is, after all, just another person--a seeker, like ourselves. And, since we cared enough to devote our time and energies to disliking her, she is probably someone who would be rewarding to know. Recovery has given us the opportunity to turn over many negative feelings, to discover that "friend" and "enemy" can be two sides of the same person. Today, I will look into my heart and see whether I am clinging to obsessive concerns with other people. I will resolve to let them go. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Laying the Foundation The groundwork has been laid. Do you not see that? Don't you understand that all you have gone through was for a purpose? There was a reason, a good reason, for the waiting, the struggle, the pain, and finally the release. You have been prepared. The same way a builder must first tear down and dig out the old to make way for the new, your Higher Power has been cleaning out the foundation in your life. Have you ever watched a builder at construction? When he begins his work, it looks worse than before he began. What is old and decayed must be removed. What is insufficient or too weak to support the new structure must be removed, replaced, or reinforced. No builder who cares about his or her work would put a new surface over an insufficient support system. The foundation would give way. It would not last. If the finished product is to be what is desired, the work must be done thoroughly from the bottom up. As the work progresses, it often appears to be an upheaval. Often, it does not seem to make sense. It may appear to be wasted time and effort, because we cannot see the final product yet. But it is so important that the foundation be laid properly if the fun work, the finishing touches, is to be all that we want it to be. This long, hard time in your life has been for laying of groundwork. It was not without purpose, although at times the purpose may not have been evident or apparent. Now, the foundation has been laid. The structure is solid. Now, it is time for the finishing touches, the completion. It is time to move the furniture in and enjoy the fruits of the labor. Congratulations. You have had the patience to endure the hard parts. You have trusted, surrendered, and allowed your Higher Power and the Universe to heal and prepare you. Now, you shall enjoy the good that has been planned. Now, you shall see the purpose. Now, it shall all come together and make sense. Enjoy. Today, I will surrender to the laying of the foundation - the groundwork - in my life. If it is time to enjoy the placement of the finishing touches, I will surrender to that, and enjoy that too. I will remember to be grateful for a Higher Power that is a Master Builder and only has my best interests in mind, creating and constructing my life. I will be grateful for my Higher Power's care and attention to details in laying the foundation - even though I become impatient at times. I will stand in awe at the beauty of God's finished product. It feels so good to help other people and to know that I have something to give them. It feels so good to have turned my own life around so that it can benefit others. (Author's note: Please know that we all have so much to give. The world really needs us recovering folks now. We have been given an extraordinary gift of a way of life second to none, and as we continue to grow spiritually, we do make a difference in the world.) --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Joy Is Your Next Lesson Learning compassion, understanding love, and experiencing joy. That’s our purpose, our reason for being here. That’s our true mission on this planet. Learning compassion may have been difficult, because in order to feel compassion for others without judging, we had to go through difficult times ourselves. Times when despite our best efforts we couldn’t help ourselves, times when despite our searching we couldn’t find the answers. As many say, it is usually our own pain and problems that makes us compassionate. Understanding love may have taken many years, many heartbreaks, and much searching and grasping until we discovered that the key to love was our own heart. Until we discovered that love wasn’t exactly what we thought or hoped it would be. Now it’s different. And better. Don’t give up. Don’t stop now. Don’t let the residue, the pain from the early parts of your journey, stop you from going forward. We first had to learn about compassion and love in order to learn joy. The hard work is done. Now you have reached your reward. Now it is time to learn joy. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Slow down and let go On a road trip up the California coast a while back, I tried to call home only to find that the batteries in my cell phone had died. I worried. What if someone needed to get in touch with me? What if there was a problem with the house? What if my family couldn’t find me and got worried? I passed the exit to the beach that I had always wanted to see. I obessed some more. I stopped for breakfast at a restaurant overlooking the Pacific Ocean. I asked if they had a pay phone. They didn’t. I barely noticed the stunning view, the smell or the sound of the surf, and I can’t remember eating my eggs and toast. I put off seeing things until another trip; I took the freeway and got home early. When I got home, there were no messages. No one had needed me; no one had even been aware that I was gone. But I had missed out on the treasures of the trip. I had spent so much time obsessing, I could barely remember where I’d been. Are you missing out on the wonder of your trip because you’re in too big of a hurry? Let go. Breathe deeply. As long as you’re taking the journey, you might as well relax and enjoy the ride. God, help me enjoy where I am right now. *************************************** The Ways We Love Choosing to Have a Mate or Being Single The way we choose to love can be as unique as the way we choose to make a living, maintain our health, or entertain ourselves. Some choose to seek out a mate and enter into a partnership with a special individual, while others find immense satisfaction in staying single. There is no right or wrong way to be in your life when it comes to deciding whether or not to be in a relationship, even though society tends to put an emphasis on romantic partnerships. Whether you choose to go through life as part of a romantic relationship or live as a single unit, there are benefits to both. Feel free to be comfortable with whatever choice is right for you. Choosing to be single is a wonderful way to spend time discovering yourself. You have more time and space to figure out what and how you want your life to be without having to keep someone else’s choices in mind. Being single gives you the freedom to do what you want at a moment’s notice and the pride that comes with facing life on your own terms. Companionship, support, and affection can be found while spending quality time with friends, colleagues, and relatives. There is also the fun that comes with being able to date many different people without having to make a commitment. Choosing to have a mate, on the other hand, brings with it an opportunity to share your life with another person. There is comfort in the knowledge that you are facing the world with someone as a united front. When life is challenging, you are in a position to strengthen, as well as give each other comfort. There is also the inevitable transformation of self that comes from allowing another person t! o so intimately be a part of your life. Remember that what is right for one person may not be right for another, and people can transition between wanting to be with another person and wanting to be alone many times over the course of their lives. Whether you seek out a mate or live the single life, embracing it fully will ensure that either choice is as fulfilling as possible for you. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day My life before coming to The Program was not unlike the lives of so many of us who were cruelly buffeted and tormented by the power of our addictions. For years, I had been sick and tired. When I became sick and tired of being sick and tired, I finally surrendered and came to The Program. Now I realize that I had been helped all along by a Higher Power; it was He, indeed, who allowed me to live so that I could eventually find a new way of life. Since my awakening, have I found a measure of serenity previously unknown in my life. Today I Pray May I realize that my Higher Power has not suddenly come into my life like a stranger opening a door when I knocked. The Power has been there all along, if I will just remember how many brushes with disaster I have survived by a fraction of time or distance. Now that I have come to know my Higher Power better, I realize that I must have been saved from something — for helping others like me. Today I Will Remember I am grateful to be alive and recovering. *************************************** One More Day To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness. – Robert Muller When we are trying to cope with a newly diagnosed illness, feelings may be hurt a little too easily, especially when we feel slighted by the very people we feel should understand. We probably are more vulnerable to hurt at first, and we may even at times feel sorry for ourselves. There comes a time, however, when we can see the futility of carrying old grudges. There’s no longer a need to know or prove who was right and who was wrong. As we’ve learned to cope with our illness, we’ve become emotionally stronger — strong enough to let go of anger and to forgive. The more we forgive, the calmer and more serene we will become, until ultimately our reward will be inner peace and trust. I can let go of past hurts. I can bridge the gap caused by misunderstandings. ***************************************** One Day At A Time WILLINGNESS Yet we finally did make choices that brought about our recovery. We came to believe that alone we were powerless over [food]. This was surely a choice, and a most difficult one. We came to believe that a Higher Power could restore us to sanity when we became willing to practice [program's] twelve steps. In short, we chose to 'become willing,' and no better choice did we ever make." from "As Bill Sees It" I floundered in program for a good while. I was not willing to do the Fourth Step; it scared me. Then I did it, and recovery continued. I floundered in program again. I was not willing to do the extra work I knew I would have to do to stay in the program. I was scared of being a sponsor, so I left. The disease gradually took me over. I came back to program. This time I was willing. No longer did the phrase "going to any lengths" scare me. I knew I needed to do whatever it took. The disease had beaten me down to where I had no choice if I wanted to recover. I took the steps ... all the steps. I became a sponsor. I also discovered that abstinence is only the beginning of recovery - that life is joyful and free. It all began with willingness on my part. I didn't have the power to change my life, but my Higher Power was able to change it once I became willing to follow the Twelve Steps to the best of my ability. One Day at a Time . . . I will ask for and receive the willingness to work this program. ~ Julie ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote HAPPY NEW YEAR! A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, 'a design for living' that really works. - Pg.28 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Life is not fair. You see it in the headlines; you see it in people racked with chronic pain; you see it in senseless street violence and children starving in third world countries. It will be a challenge for you in the coming weeks to understand it is not an unfair thing that has just happened, addiction and then recovery, but the greatest fight you shall ever receive. I do not know why good people suffer addiction. It is the very act of not understanding and still trusting in the good of the universe that comprises the very essence of faith. Life is a Spiritual Journey No one can learn the alphabet for me. And no one can develop wisdom, appreciation or inner strength for me. These are things I have to do for myself. What is life but growth and expansion, increasing my understanding so that I can deepen my experience of feeling alive? There are gifts in healing if I am willing to see them, lessons I can learn, awareness's that I need in order to appreciate what I already have. Sickness can be my teacher if I let it. Even as I wait for strength to return to my body, still my spirit and my character can grow stronger and better and more refined. I am not doing nothing as I lie here, I am growing on the inside. Today I will use this moment that puts me into a deeper part of myself to come in contact with an openness to grow. I am in touch with a part of life that I normally don't get in touch with. I am understanding and expanding my inner world. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When you can't find the solution to a problem, look for the soulution to the problem. I keep whispering my heart's desires because I never know when my angel is listening. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The program is for participants, not spectators. Time for Joy - Book - Quote It feels so good to help other people and to know that I have something to give them. It feels so good to have turned my own life around so that it can benefit others. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote We must think of all those sick ones still to come to AA. As they try to make their return to faith and to life, we want them to find everything in AA that we have found, and yet more, if that be possible. No care, no vigilance, no effort to preserve AA's constant effectiveness will ever be too great to hold us in full readiness for the day of their homecoming. Bill W. 1959. |
December 31
Daily Reflections Daily Resolutions The idea of "twenty-four-hour" living applies primarily to the emotional life of the individual. Emotionally speaking, we must not live in yesterday, nor in tomorrow. As Bill Sees It, p. 284 A New year: 12 months, 52 weeks, 365 days, 8,760 hours, 525,600 minutes--a time to consider directions, goals, and actions. I must make some plans to live a normal life, but also I must live emotionally within a twenty-four hour frame, for if I do, I don't have to make New Year's resolutions! I can make every day a New Year's day! I can decide, "Today I will do this . . . Today I will do that." Each day I can measure my life by trying to a little better, by deciding to follow God's will and making an effort to put the principles of our A.A. program into action. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I shall be loyal in my attendance, generous in my giving, kind in my criticism, creative in my suggestions, loving in my attitudes. I shall give A.A. my interest, my enthusiasm, my devotion, and most of all, myself. The Lord's Prayer has become part of my A.A. thoughts for each day: "Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil." Have I given myself? Meditation For The Day As we look back over the year just gone, it has been a good year to the extent that we have put good thoughts, good words, and good deeds into it. None of what we have thought, said, or done need be wasted. Both the good and the bad experiences can be profited by. In a sense, the past is not entirely gone. The result of it, for good or evil, is with us at the present moment. We can only learn by experience and none of our experience is completely wasted. We can humbly thank God for the good things of the year that has gone. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may carry good things into the year ahead. I pray that I may carry on with faith, with prayer, and with hope. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Wider Understanding, p.255 To reach more alcoholics, understanding of A.A. and public good will towards A.A. must go on growing everywhere. We need to be on still better terms with medicine, courts, prisons, mental hospitals, and all enterprises in the alcoholism field. We need the increasing good will of editors, writers, television and radio channels. These publicity outlets need to be opened ever wider. ******************************** Nothing matters more to A.A.'s future welfare than the manner in which we use the colossus of modern communication. Used unselfishly and well, it can produce results surpassing our present imagination. Should we handle this great instrument badly, we shall be shattered by the ego manifestations of our own people. Against this peril, A.A. members' anonymity before the general public is our shield and our buckler. 1. Twelve Concepts, p.51 2. Grapevine, November 1960 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Has it been a Year of Growth? Growth As any year draws to a close, we should reflect on how we have grown in sobriety. We should also identify changes during the year that enabled us to overcome bad habits and to move closer to better patterns of living. Though we never are guaranteed favorable outcomes, we should always remember that sobriety is its own reward. We want a full life of course, but it must begin with a decision to seek and to maintain sobriety at all costs. We find that with sobriety, lots of other problems seem to solve themselves. Even if they don't we have the tools to move forward and to achieve goals that always eluded us while we were drinking. Every year in sobriety is a year of growth. I'll be conscious today of recent improvements I've made in my life and all my affairs. With sobriety, these improvements will go on for a lifetime. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple May you live all the days of your life'--Jonathan Swift. Tonight, at midnight, a New Year will begin. None of us know what the New Year will hold. But we can trust ourselves to hold on to the spirit of recovery as we go through the year. As a New Year is about to begin, we can rejoice in our new way of life. We can give our will and our life to our HP. By doing these things, we'll be ready for the New Year. PRAYER: Higher Power, I pray that I'll start the New Year safe in Your loving arms. I pray that I'll keep working my program. ACTION: Tonight, at midnight, I'll say the Serenity Prayer. I will think of all the others who have read this meditation book and who will join me in this prayer. We are a recovering community. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning In the process of growing to spiritual maturity, we all go through many adolescent stages. --Miki L. Bowen Progress, not perfection, is our goal in this recovery program. And many days we'll be haunted by the feeling that we've regressed. We will display old behavior. We will feel unable to change, to go on, to make gains once again. But these periods will pass, and soon progress will be evident again. We must be wary of our need for perfection. It's this need that makes normal progress seem not good enough. And yet, that's all we're capable of--and all we'll ever need to be capable of. The program, its Steps and the promises offered, provide the tools we have lacked, yet need to use in order to accept ourselves wholly and imperfectly. Daily attention to our spiritual side will foster the spiritual and emotional health we long for. Prayer and meditation, combined with honest inventory-taking, can show us the personal progress needed, the personal progress made. However, we will falter on occasion. We will neglect our program some days. But it won't ever be beyond our reach. And each day is a new beginning. Today is before me, and I can make progress. I will begin with a quiet prayer and a moment of meditation. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS If he is sincerely interested and wants to see you again, ask him to read this book in the interval. After doing that, he must decide for himself whether he wants to go on. He should not be pushed or prodded by you, his wife, or his friends. If he is to find God, the desire must come from within. p. 95 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories ON THE MOVE - Working the A.A. program showed this alcoholic how to get from geographics to gratitude. At my home group, members didn't give up one me; they loved me anyway. One day the group's general service representative announced she was moving and would have to give up her commitment, and they elected me to her job. They explained to me that a serious, two-year commitment was exactly what I needed. I tried to explain that I was not eligible, but they told me to go to the monthly general service business meeting and tell them my problems with serving. Needless to say, they didn't allow me to quit either. pp. 490-491 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Twelve - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." A.A. has many single alcoholics who wish to marry and are in a position to do so. Some marry fellow A.A.'s. How do they come out? On the whole these marriages are very good ones. Their common suffering as drinkers, their common interest in A.A. and spiritual things, often enhance such unions. It is only where "boy meets girl on A.A. campus," and love follows at first sight, that difficulties may develop. The prospective partners need to be solid A.A.'s and long enough acquainted to know that their compatibility at spiritual, mental, and emotional levels is a fact and not wishful thinking. They need to be as sure as possible that no deep-lying emotional handicap in either will be likely to rise up under later pressures to cripple them. The considerations are equally true and important for the A.A.'s who marry "outside" A.A. With clear understanding and right, grown-up attitudes, very happy results do follow. pp. 119-120 ************************************************** ********* "Wherever you go, whomever you meet, look for an opportunity to help, to inspire, to lend support." --Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson Most people search high and wide for the keys to success. If they only knew, the key to their dreams lies within. --George Washington Carver Look for the Good. --unknown The traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous help me play well with others, when what I really want to do is take my toys and go home! --unknown "You can't build a reputation on what you're going to do." --Henry Ford ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation CHANGE "It is not necessary to get away from human nature but to alter its inner attitude of heart and mind." -- J. F. Newton An understanding of sobriety and serenity that has proved helpful to me is that we are not only changing but involved in change. We determine the results of the change. I can change for good or bad. I can stay sober or drink. I can be cheerful and creative or negative and destructive. My attitude determines the results of my changing life. Spirituality has been given, but it also needs to be nurtured. I need to surround myself with loving and honest people if I am to allow my spirituality to grow in my life. My continued willingness is essential to my sobriety and serenity. Thank You for making me with a mind and heart that together create the action. ************************************************** ********* I believe that I am now a child of God . 1 John 3:1-3 I believe that I was saved by the grace of God through faith, that it was a gift and not the result of any works on my part. Ephesians 2:8 I choose to be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Ephesians 6:10 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration To have courage, think courageous, act courageous, and pray to God for courage. Lord, You are full of love for all who come to You. Abundance is God's to give, so shut out all limited thoughts. Lord, my faith in You and my faith in the talents and abilities You have given me makes me able to achieve my goals. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Being Of Service "Working with others is only the beginning of service work." Basic Text, pg 56 We're in recovery now. Through living the program, we've attained some stability in our lives. Our faith in a Higher Power has grown. Our individual spiritual awakening is progressing comfortably. So now what? Do we simply sit still and enjoy? Of course not. We find a way to be of service. We tend to think of service only in terms of committee service or holding a position at some level, but service goes far beyond this understanding. In fact, we can find opportunities to be of service in nearly every area of our lives. Our jobs are a form of service to our communities, no matter what our occupation. The work we do in our homes serves our families. Perhaps we do volunteer work in our communities. What a difference our service efforts make! If we doubt this, we can just imagine what the world would be like if no one bothered to be of service to others. Our work serves humanity. The message we carry goes beyond the rooms of recovery, affecting everything we do. Just for today: I will look for opportunities to be of service in everything I do. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Finish each day and be done with it. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well. --Ralph Waldo Emerson Two of the most useless phrases in the English language are "what if" and "if only." We waste so much time and energy thinking about what we might have done and wishing we had acted or reacted differently. We imagine how things might have turned out "if only . . ." All of us make mistakes. To go back and wonder and wish about our yesterdays prevents us from living fully today. Each day is a fresh chance; a new beginning. We can only squeeze what we can out of the moment and let the drops fall where they may. Some will evaporate and some will form rainbows. Can I forget about yesterday and start a fresh new day? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Dawns another year, Open it aright; Thou shalt have no fear In its fading light. --Joseph Krauskopf New Year's Eve is a good time to reflect upon the closing year and set our direction for the year ahead. This day reminds us that every day of the year is lived just one at a time. Looking back, we can see a year's change in ourselves. We see the progress we have made as men on our journey. Perhaps we see how much stronger we are emotionally. Maybe we see relationships that have developed because of our growing ability to love. Certainly all of us have some things we regret and some changes we mourn. They too have their place today. As we begin the coming year, let us review our relationship with each of the Steps. We may perceive aspects of our program that call for more attention. One or two particular Steps may speak to our needs at this time or may have been overlooked in this past year. On this last day of the year, we can again turn our lives and will over to the care of a loving God. I look to the New Year with a renewed commitment to the Steps. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. In the process of growing to spiritual maturity, we all go through many adolescent stages. --Miki L. Bowen Progress, not perfection, is our goal in this recovery program. And many days we'll be haunted by the feeling that we've regressed. We will display old behavior. We will feel unable to change, to go on, to make gains once again. But these periods will pass, and soon progress will be evident again. We must be wary of our need for perfection. It's this need that makes normal progress seem not good enough. And yet, that's all we're capable of--and all we'll ever need to be capable of. The program, its Steps and the promises offered, provide the tools we have lacked, yet need to use in order to accept ourselves wholly and imperfectly. Daily attention to our spiritual side will foster the spiritual and emotional health we long for. Prayer and meditation, combined with honest inventory-taking, can show us the personal progress needed, the personal progress made. However, we will falter on occasion. We will neglect our program some days. But it won't ever be beyond our reach. And each day is a new beginning. Today is before me, and I can make progress. I will begin with a quiet prayer and a moment of meditation. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Affirming the Good Fun becomes fun, love becomes love, life becomes worth living. And we become grateful. --Beyond Codependency Wait, and expect good things - for yourself and your loved ones. When you wonder what is coming, tell yourself the best is coming, the very best life and love have to offer, the best God and His universe have to send. Then open your hands to receive it. Claim it, and it is yours. See the best in your mind; envision what it will look like, what it will feel like. Focus, until you can see it clearly. Let your whole being, body and soul, enter into and hold onto the image for a moment. Then, let it go. Come back into today, the present moment. Do not obsess. Do not become fearful. Become excited. Live today fully, expressing gratitude for all you have been, all you are, and all you will become. Wait, and expect good things. Today, when I think abut the year ahead, I will focus on the good that is coming. Today I have all the willingness... all the energy and all the guidance to continue to choose the path of peace and love and joy. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Honor the Ending “How was your trip?” a friend asked, as my trip drew to a close. I thought for a moment, then the answer came easily. “It had its ups and downs,” I said. “There were times I felt exhilarated and sure I was on track. Other days I felt lost. Confused. I’d fall into bed at night certain that this whole trip was a mistake and a waste. But I’d wake up in the morning, something would happen, and I’d see how I’d been guided all along.” The journey of a year is drawing to a close. Cherish the moments, all of them, even the ups and downs. Cherish the places you’ve visited, the people you’ve seen. Say good-bye to those whose journey have called them someplace else. Know you can always call them back by thinking loving thoughts. Know all those you love will be there for you when you need them most. Honor the lessons you’ve learned, and the people who helped you learn them. Honor the journey your soul mapped out for you. Trust all the places you’ve been. Make a scrapbook in your heart to help you remember. Look back for a moment. Reflect in peace. Then let this year draw to a close. All parts of the journey are sacred and holy. You’ve learned that by now. Take time to honor this ending– though it’s never really the end. Go to sleep tonight. When you wake up tomorrow, a new adventure will begin. Remember the words you were told when this last adventure began, the words whispered quietly to your heart: Let the journey unfold. Let it be magical. The way has been prepared. People will be expecting you. Yes, you are being led. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go The adventure is in the trip We were on our way to the drop zone when Chip turned to me. “Let’s go to San Francisco and see a widgeon.” “Widgeon?” I said. “Okay. Let’s go.” “These are the rules,” he said, pulling off the highway and getting back on the exit ramp heading north. “We’ll stop at the house for a minute. But we can’t pack. We can only take with us what we have on us now. We’ll have to trust ourselves to get whatever else we need on the way.” “Okay,” I said. “You’re on.” I didn’t know what a widgeon was. Four hours later, we were walking barefoot on Morro Beach, just south of Big Sur. A big rock, one that looked like the fossil remains of a dinosaur hunched over in the water, beckoned. So did the impending sunset. I still didn’t know what a widgeon was, but I was glad we were searching for one. “You’d better call Andy,” I said, watching the waves crash against the dinosaur rock. “You guys were supposed to go climbing tomorrow.” Chip took the cell phone I was handing him. “I’ve got an idea,” I said. “Tell Andy to get on a plane, fly to San Francisco, wait for us to pick him up, then come with us to find a widgeon.” Chip called Andy. Thirty-five mintues later, Andy called back. “I’ll be at the United gate at the San Francisco airport at 9:34. See you!” he said. Chip and I looked at each other. It was 6:34. We were two hundred miles south of San Francisco and had already started traveling the One through Big Sur– a winding two lane highway that climbed high banks, offered a breathtaking view, and needed to be traveled slowly and cautiously. Half an hour later, we looked at the odometer. We had gone twelve miles. Chip turned east on a road the suddenly appeared. It was slightly bigger than a one-lane road, winding its way through the mountains that separated us from the interstate and a sixty-five mile per hour limit. He drove like a Daytona master. Forty-five minutes later, we had traveled another twelve miles. Focus, focus, focus. Focus on the destination, not the journey. Just get there. At 10:35, one hour past Andy’s arrival time, we pulled up in front of the baggage claim. A six foot, two inch Texas blond guy sat on a bench, reading a book. We honked. He looked up, waved, then lumbered over to the car and slid into the backseat. “What’s a widgeon?” he said. The next morning, we set out for Ace Aviation, the home of the widgeon. We didn’t know where it was, but we headed in what we thought was the right direction. Suddenly, Chip pointed to a sign. “Seaplanes!” We pulled off the road, and went in. “Have you heard of Ace Aviation?” we wasked. “Yup,” she said. “Is there a widgeon there?” we asked. “Yup,” she said. “Will you tell us where it is?” we asked. She did. One hour later, we pulled into the parking lot for Ace Aviation. For the next hour, we fawned over widgeons– amphibious planes with a peculiar yet immediate and undeniable charm. The name painted on one widgeon read, “Da Plane.” It was the seaplane from Fantasy Island. We found a hot springs motel on the lasr evening of the trip. Sitting in the outdoor hot tub, I found many things remarkable: the almost full moon in the sky, the calming effect of the water, and the toothpaste provided by the hotel. All along the trip, our wishes seemed to magically appear– from a restaurant on a desolate strip of beach, to a restroom in the middle of a forest, to a widgeon in a widgeon hospital. I’ve said before; I’ll say it again. It’s good to have a destination, but the adventure is in the trip. Take a moment. Review where you’ve been this past year. Be grateful for all you’ve experienced and the people who have come into your life. Search your heart. Let go of any resentments. Take a moment and reflect on your successes. Be grateful for them; be grateful for all the ordinary moments,too. Take a look at your goal list. Some things have taken place. Other things may not have materialized yet. Don’t give up yet. Let go. Tomorrow, you can make a new list. God, thank you for this year. Clear my heart so I can start yomorrow with a clean slate. *************************************** New Year's Resolutions: The Two Lists A Message from DailyOM Co-Founder Scott Blum I was fortunate to spend time with an enigmatic man named Robert during a very special period of my life. Robert taught me many things during our days together, and this time of year reminds me of one particular interaction we had. "Now that you are becoming more aware," Robert said, "you need to begin to set goals for yourself so you don't lose the momentum you have built." "Like New Year's resolutions?" I asked. "That's an interesting idea," he smirked. "Let's do that." By then I was used to his cryptic responses, so I knew something was up because of the way his eyes sparkled as he let out an impish laugh. "Tonight's assignment is to make two lists," Robert continued. "The first is a list of all the New Year's resolutions you WANT to keep, and the second is a list of all the New Year's resolutions you WILL keep. Write the WANT List first, and when you have exhausted all of your ideas, then write the second list on another sheet of paper." That night I went home and spent several hours working on the two lists. The WANT List felt overwhelming at first, but after a while I got into writing all the things I had always wanted to do if the burdens of life hadn't gotten in the way. After nearly an hour, the list swelled to fill the entire page and contained nearly all of my ideas of an ideal life. The second list was much easier, and I was able to quickly commit ten practical resolutions that I felt would be both realistic and helpful. The next day, I met Robert in front of the local food Co-op, where we seemed to have most of our enlightening conversations. "Tell me about your two lists," Robert said as the familiar smirk crept onto his face. "The first list contains all the things I SHOULD do if I completely changed my life to be the person I always wanted to be. And the second list contains all the things I COULD do by accepting my current life, and taking realistic steps towards the life I want to lead." "Let me see the second list," he said. I handed him the second list, and without even looking at it, he ripped the paper into tiny pieces and threw it in the nearby garbage can. His disregard for the effort I had put into the list annoyed me at first, but after I calmed down I began to think about the first list in a different light. In my heart, I knew the second list was a cop out, and the first list was the only one that really mattered. "And now, the first list." Robert bowed his head and held out both of his hands. I purposefully handed him the first list and held his gaze for several seconds, waiting for him to begin reading the page. After an unusually long silence, he began to crumple the paper into a ball and once again tossed it into the can without looking at it. "What did you do that for?!" I couldn't hide my anger any longer. Robert began to speak in a quiet and assured voice. "What you SHOULD or COULD do with your life no longer matters. The only thing that matters, from this day forward, is what you MUST do." He then drew a folded piece of paper from his back pocket and handed it to me. I opened it carefully, and found a single word floating in the middle of the white page: "Love." Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day God grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change; COURAGE to change the things I can; and WISDOM to know the difference — living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it: Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His will; that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with him forever in the next. Amen. Today I Pray May I look back at this past year as a good one, in that nothing I did or said was wasted. No experience — however insignificant it may have seemed — was worthless. Hurt gave me the capacity to feel happiness; bad times made me appreciate the good ones; what I regarded was my weaknesses became my greatest strengths. I thank God for a year of growing. Today I will Remember Hope is my “balance brought forward” — into a new year’s ledger. *************************************** One More Day Afflictions are not really a good gift — neither they nor their consequences. However, if afflictions do come, it is well that we convert them into afflictions of love. Herein lies the power of man. –Chaim Nachman Bialik All around us we hear cries of “Happy New Year,” and we wonder if this next year is going to be happier than last year was. Carrying the burden of chronic pain or a chronic illness is far more demanding than most people can imagine;. It can overwhelm our days. We alone have the power to convert that pain, loneliness, and any feelings of guilt into external expressions of ourselves, such as helping others. It’s almost impossible to be completely wound up in ourselves when we are doing for others. I feel positive thoughts about this New Year. My goal is to reach out to at least one person each day. ***************************************** One Day At A Time Life Is Worth Living "These, then, are my last words to you: Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living. and your belief will help create the fact. William James (1842 ~ 1910) I have lived my life as a compulsive eater and I have known many other compulsive eaters. I believe I can say unequivocally that life is much more difficult in so many ways for us than for many others. I denied that what I suffered from was a disease; yet I watched as over the years it robbed me of so many things others take for granted. Most of us will acknowledge early on that the manifestations of compulsive eating affects us spiritually, emotionally and physically. Volumes have been written about each of these so most reading this know the devastation it causes. When I began to inventory my life and saw how much the quality of it had suffered, it saddened me greatly. I believe one of the most difficult ways the disease of COE, or any compulsive illness, affects us is the way society looks upon us. Because I have experienced life both ways, I know how behavior and attitudes change in interacting with a COE vs a non-COE. We wear our disease on the outside ... but the extensive damage is far more wide-spread than just the physical. The disease wrecks havoc in every area of our lives as we silently go about our life doing the things expected of us. We don't dare scapegoat the disease. After all, this is not a cancer ... or heart disease. Yet it can be just as serious. Many decades ago, a group of alcoholics gathered and, as a result, life began to change for those of us who struggled with the disease. When I reached the point in my life that I could actually acknowledgement that compulsive eating was affecting it and that I had done everything possible to stop it and couldn't, it was one of the most freeing moments I've ever experienced. I learned that I was as powerless over this as I would have been suffering a heart attack. I also learned that I couldn't handle it alone. I learned that there were twelve steps that were absolutely necessary if I were to survive emotionally and, perhaps even physically. I went from fighting the disease to acknowledging it. Because of the Steps I learned that there were tens of thousands of others exactly like me and that we all spoke the same beautiful language. I learned not to be afraid of life ... and that, despite this despicable disease, life is truly worth living. I was told to "act as if" and by doing this it became no longer an act. One day at a time ... I affirm that my life is worth living. One day at a time, I affirm that I will not be afraid of anything that makes me feel otherwise. ~ Mari ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote HAPPY NEW YEAR! Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you trudge the Road of Happy Destiny. May God bless you and keep you - until then. - Pg. 164 - A Vision For You Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Under stress men are more likely to do the 'fight or flight' thing and counter stress with anger or desertion. Women are more likely to adopt the 'tend and befriend' mode where they begin to nurture others and make alliances. You will be adopting a number of strategies in your growing recovery. Try to make as many of them proactive as you can. The more you respond (with thought and deliberation) than react (instinctively), the better you will weather the journey. I seek solutions and guidelines for my behaviors and the coming decisions I must make. I do not 'react' but 'respond' to the situations in my life. I Will Live in My Body as Well as My Head I cannot hold onto life any more than I can hold onto a rain storm, a cloud or a sun set. I will not know how to be, what to do or how to act if I am ever living in my head. I have to live in my body, too, in the present, spontaneously part of the moment with head and heart in balance so I can sense where I am and where the current of life is taking me. So that we can be free of what is in the way of manifesting our own good. So that we can live in the present unencumbered with unresolved pain from the past. So that we can stop repeating the same old dysfunctional patterns from our past in our relationships in the present. Emotional balance allows us to live in this alive and ever changing present so that we can respond spontaneously to any given moment or any given situation. So that we have the inner balance to be responsive, flexible and alive. So that we can live in the present. Living in my head limits my spontaneity. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The sole purpose of AA is to help the alcoholic stop drinking. The sole purpose of NA is to help the addict stop using. The sole purpose of CDA is to help the chemically dependent give up mind affecting chemicals. The soul purpose of all these fellowships is service, unity, and recovery. 'I do not put the sole purpose of any fellowship above the soul purpose.' ~Shelly Marshall "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book To be considered trustworthy, one must be trust-wordy. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know that I am at choice. Today I have all the willingness, all the energy, and all the guidance to continue to choose the path of peace and love and joy. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Keep coming back. Unknown origin. |
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