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Spiritual Foundation

Quote:

God would give me just enough light for the step I am on...that I would learn to walk by faith.

I read this quote on another site. I had never heard it put this way before. I found it to be very empowering. When I am stuck, I know I can surrender in the moment, accept what is in the moment, and ask for help and it will be given to me.

It is my personal belief that the Light comes in at the point of surrender. I can't, God can, and I have to ask for His help. I have to follow it up with action.

Surrender is a Principle of Step One for me. God brought me here, and gives me the tools to stay here, one day at a time.

It goes hand in hand with honesty and acceptance.

"Step One is the base of the pyramid of the rest of the alcoholic's life"

- unknown

This was posted originally in 2007 on another site.

Quote:

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol/alcoholics-that our lives had become unmanageable.

As I have grown in the program, I have come to realize that my powerlessness is over many things, not just alcohol, but my self-admitted alcoholic son, my habits, my thought patterns, and life as a whole.

I am not the power; although for many years' I thought I was. What I have come to find out is that when I surrender, turn it over and ask for help, then I am 'empowered' to do what I need to do for myself.

The problem is but symptom of my disease, often it is my thinking along with my actions, that I need to change.

Part of what kept me from doing this Step 100% was my denial. Assuming I had the power to change or that I was in control. Control is an illusion which only keeps me sick.

During the next week I invite you all to share on what this Step has meant to you in your recovery, how you apply it to your life. How you apply this Step into your life today and share how it was in 'yesteryear' for the newcomers on the board.

Topics and spiritual principles which apply to this Step:

- powerlessness
-unmanageability
-honesty
-surrender
-acceptance
-control
- denial

This Step was the beginning of a new life and a new awareness for me. I often think they put the '-' into this Step because there isn't enough space to list all the things that I am powerless over, and all the things that I used to search for that something outside of myself to make me happy, content, and regain 'control' of my life.

I had no concept of the word 'powerless' until I substituted it for the word control. When I looked back on my life I realized that it was all an illusion. No matter how much I tried to control my drinking, there was always more. I could stop, but I couldn't stay stopped. When I picked up, I wasn't sure how much picking I would end up doing or where it would take me or what would happen.

Every time I picked up, I gave away a piece of me. My self-will, my self-esteem, my self-respect, etc. I lost my values, my principles and my determination, everything went out the window, my life was always centered around the alcohol or the alcoholic. The person (son, father, mother, husbands, boyfriends, neighbors, sponsees, friends and family members), place (my bed, the bar, the Legion, the kitchen, the stores, the work place, the church, the gym, etc.), and things (drugs (prescription and street), alcohol (a drug too), computer, cards, food, and more.... took over my life and my thinking, and governed my thoughts.

I become obsessive compulsive, and when I have a taste be it thought, physical and emotionally, I always want more, unless I surrender the situation over to the God of my understanding. When I came in, I didn't have much concept of letting go, let alone a belief in God which was to follow as a result of working the Steps.

The first five Steps of change for me are:

Awareness of my problem (challenge)
Admittance of that problem
Acceptance of the problem
Action to change the problem
Attitude adjustment that I am "powerless" and my life is unmanageable or I need to change my attitude so I can take action to bring about change.

My sponsor told me that the word problem is negative and that if I use the word challenge, it could be overcome. The substance isn't the problem, I am. It is about changing me and my attitude to bring about change.

P. 569 (Third Edition) Big Book of Alcoholic Anonymous

There is a difference that some people don't recognize.

l) That once the alcoholic has picked up, he is no longer in control and is acting out in his disease.
2) That even though he is not actively using, he is still under the influence and has the thinking patterns unless he has experienced the spiritual changes in his life.
3) That alcohol is a killer and no respecter of persons and it is a disease that affects the whole family.

I came to Recovery.
I came to realize that I had a disease (dis-ease)
I came to believe that there was a God and only through a spiritual change, could I recover.

I can't,
God can,
Just for today, I choose to let Him.

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