[bluidkiti]

February 8

Quote of the Week

"The good part of recovery is that you get your feelings back; the bad part is that you get your feelings back."

Ah, the paradox of recovery—one of many. When I was out there, I had an easy way of dealing with my feelings: I’d numb them with alcohol. Unable to feel or even acknowledge my feelings, I drifted through the complexities of relationships and situations, neither growing nor evolving. In fact, I’ve heard it said that we come into the program emotionally frozen at the age we started drinking and using.

So here I was, a thirty-seven-year-old man with the emotional maturity of a seventeen-year-old. And here came a bewildering onslaught of feelings. Shame, hurt, fear, rage, regret, resentments—the range, depth, and color of my feelings were overwhelming. At first, I didn’t think I would survive, but I followed my sponsor’s direction and kept coming to meetings, and I stayed sober.

Over time, I learned that my feelings were not going to kill me. I learned that, although sometimes painful and unwanted, all my feelings were valid, and each had something valuable to teach me. Through working the Steps, I developed tools to process my emotions and soon learned to give them the space and respect they deserved. Today, my feelings are teachers, and all teachers are welcome.