Bluidkiti's Alcohol and Drug Addictions Recovery Help/Support Forums - View Single Post - Today's Thought

bluidkiti · 06-17-2016, 07:22 AM

June 17

Regret is an appalling waste of energy, you can't build on it; it's only good for wallowing in.
--Katherine Mansfield

Newcomer

Someone I hoped would be an important part of my life for years to come has left. I'm devastated. I don't know how much of what happened is my fault; I keep thinking, "If only I hadn't said what I said . . . "

Sponsor

Human lives are filled with all kinds of separation. Friends, mates, and family members - the people in our lives are only lent to us. If they accompany us for some part of our journey, we're blessed. We don't get to control or keep them.

Sentences beginning "if only" can go nowhere but straight to regret. They support our false belief that we can control what happens in other people's lives. "I should have," "I could have," and "I would have" are all variations on the same theme. They postpone acceptance and necessary grieving.

At times it's we, ourselves, who do the leaving. We can count it a success, not a failure, when we've had the courage to acknowledge the truth of an ending.

Today, though I may go through some pain as I learn acceptance, I rejoice in the strength and clarity it gives me.

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

06-17-2016, 07:22 AM	#17
bluidkiti Administrator Join Date: Aug 2013 Posts: 70,841	June 17 Regret is an appalling waste of energy, you can't build on it; it's only good for wallowing in. --Katherine Mansfield Newcomer Someone I hoped would be an important part of my life for years to come has left. I'm devastated. I don't know how much of what happened is my fault; I keep thinking, "If only I hadn't said what I said . . . " Sponsor Human lives are filled with all kinds of separation. Friends, mates, and family members - the people in our lives are only lent to us. If they accompany us for some part of our journey, we're blessed. We don't get to control or keep them. Sentences beginning "if only" can go nowhere but straight to regret. They support our false belief that we can control what happens in other people's lives. "I should have," "I could have," and "I would have" are all variations on the same theme. They postpone acceptance and necessary grieving. At times it's we, ourselves, who do the leaving. We can count it a success, not a failure, when we've had the courage to acknowledge the truth of an ending. Today, though I may go through some pain as I learn acceptance, I rejoice in the strength and clarity it gives me. You are reading from the book: If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin __________________ "No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving.