[bluidkiti]

February 14

Wisdom for Today
Recovery is not always easy. When I looked back at all the people I had harmed, there were many with whom I was anxious to make amends. Many of the people I was closest with – my family and friends – the amends began just because I was staying clean and sober. But making amends and repairing the damage done would take me some time and a consistent change in my behavior. The financial amends, although overwhelming, were perhaps the easiest. I simply needed to arrange to pay back what I owed and then be responsible for following through and making the payments.

There were other amends that were much more difficult. Some amends really frightened me, and I would need to find courage – courage that I did not have. Here depending on my sponsor and my Higher Power was essential if the repair work was ever to be completed. There were amends that I simply did not want to make. Anger, resentment and hurt stood in the way. In order to become willing to make these amends, I would need to find a way to forgive these people. No reconciliation would be possible until I could find a way in my heart to forgive the pain caused by these people. Then there were the amends I needed to make with myself. I would need to find a way not only to forgive myself but also accept me for who I was. I would need to become the person I wanted to be. I would need to become the person God wanted me to be. Repairing the damage and changing my behavior was not an easy task. Yet I knew that if I wanted to remain clean and sober, I would need to accomplish this step. Am I ready to begin the process of making amends?
Meditations for the Heart
Sometimes I do really stupid things in recovery. I ask myself, “How could I have been so stupid?” Well, the answer to this question is easy. In almost all of these situations, I reacted to events and did not seek out wisdom before I acted. I have learned through my errors and by my mistakes that simply reacting only to situations can hurt others or me. It is important for me to seek out wisdom before I respond to life on life’s terms. I need to talk with my sponsor, other recovering people and to God before choosing a direction for my response to life. In the Serenity Prayer, we pray, “and the wisdom to know the difference.” Gaining this wisdom happens only when I am willing to seek it out. Stupidity happens when I don’t stop to think. Stupidity happens when I don’t talk to others before responding to life. Stupidity happens when I react emotionally to life without thinking about what a wise response would be. The good news is that wisdom is something that can be gained by anyone. Do I seek out wisdom in all that I do?
Petitions to my Higher Power
God,

Somewhere in this day I am likely to have an opportunity to be stupid. Help me not to react without thinking. Let me seek out wisdom in all that I do. Give me the courage to make amends with everyone with whom I need to do this. Let me be wise in doing the repair work that I need to do.

Amen.