Welcome Tommy, can identify with you. The thought that came to mind was, "How can I be happy with THAT person in my life, always playing the blame game, with no thought that it was that substance we were putting into our body that was separating us from God and not allowing Him into our life, no matter who we understood we understood God to be. A friend I met on line a long time ago use to write G-d, which to me, leaves a lot of room for a lot of understanding.