Hi Mary,
This is an excellent topic for discussion. I had many failed relationships before I got sober. When I finally committed to recovery, I was single and remained so for over 5 years. Although our alcoholism effects those around us, our recovery IS up to us. Those around us may feel left out. It is suggested that friends and family attend Al-anon so that they will have some support themselves. I do hope that you can find a balance so that you are not totally blocking him out. I could see where that might cause a resentment on his part.
My present companion is a normie. We've known each other for over 30 years and he has experience with me when I was drinking and using......(part of the reason for failed attempts at a relationship in the past). He really doesn't understand why I continue to go to meetings after being clean and sober for over 6 years..........when he asked me why, I responded "You DO remember how I was before don't you". Well he never asked again why I attend the meetings and some evenings he has even said, "Hey, don't you have a function (what he calls my mtgs) to go to this evening--LOL!!
Once you are sober longer and begin to live the principles, your husband will see the difference.
I know for me, so many times in the past I had promised to get sober only to fail at the attempt. No wonder people didn't believe me.....I had let myself and others down so many times before.
I do hope everything works out......just keep doing the next right thing. Glad you are here!!
