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November 25

Step by Step

Today, taught by tradition to be thankful, let me know that simply voicing gratitude is not sufficient and the measure and extent of gratitude is reflected in my actions. Today, then, let me not be content with merely saying I am grateful and show me how to express it in action and behavior, that is, to walk the walk while I talk the talk. If today someone for whom I say I am grateful is in need of my time or if I am called upon to make some sacrifice such as missing part of a football game or giving up the holiday dinner dessert, let me be willing to do so without reservation. We are compelled in the 12th step to put our program into action with service to others even if it might inconvenience us. If today I am called upon to do something that slows or impedes my schedule and I refuse the call, I will fail as an effective 12th-stepper and, later, I will probably regret not answering the call. Today, if I am asked to be thankful, let me go a step further and express my gratitude in action. And, today, that I am clean and sober is literally everything. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

COMPLACENCY

To be nobody but myself-in a world which is doing its best to make us like everyone else — means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight and never stop fighting.

~ e.e. Cummings ~

Within our Fellowship there are many successes that make the member and their loved ones proud. One of the biggest hazards we face is overconfidence, the idea that "I've got it made." This is complacency, an enemy of recovery.

When we're complacent about what we've accomplished, we quit working at progressing. We have to remember that we will never finish our recovery journey. We will always need to keep taking the Steps.

It can be dangerous to let up on the disciplines of the Program because things are going well. We need to stay alert and remember that more relapses occur when things are going well than when they're not.

It would be easy to begin feeling like a big shot if I believed all I had to do was achieve one goal, then quit working. I won't give up my fight at staying in recovery.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Gratitude is heaven itself.

~ William Blake ~

The feeling of gratefulness sometimes sweeps over us and fills us with a warm glow. We know what it feels like to be lost and frightened, with no compass to point our way out. The great contrast between where we once were and where we are today inspires us to feel thankful. Now we have our lives back. We feel like real men again. We have the companionship of fine people. We have hope for the future.

This feeling of gratitude is an antidote to our struggles with desire. Our desires have taken us places that harmed us. We wanted more control, we wanted more pleasure, we wanted our feelings to stop, and we wanted more than was good for us. We have enough right now. This fullness of gratitude is a wonderful relief from our driving desires.

Today my desires are set aside by my gratitude and the knowledge that I have enough.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

My life is blessed. I have riches beyond belief. Why is it then that I sometimes feel lonely and unlovable?

~ Joan Rohde ~

It’s not easy to believe that we feel however we make up our minds to feel. But it’s true. If we are lonely, it’s because we aren’t letting other people in. If we feel unlovable, it’s because we aren’t letting God’s love in. How we think determines how we feel. Fortunately, we have the power to change how we think if we really want to.

How do we do that? First we need to quiet our minds and stop the barrage of self-criticism. Then we need to ponder the blessings in our lives, listing them, methodically if necessary, to acknowledge them and thus be moved by them.

It’s easy to forget that we are special. We may have to take time each day to remind ourselves of this. Even after years of recovery, we may forget for a spell that we are loved and necessary and blessed in many ways.

I won’t shame myself today for thinking negatively. Instead, I will stop, get quiet, and think of my good fortune.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I say a prayer of thanks

If I prayed at all in the past, it was only to make requests, not to give thanks. Thanks for what? My life was troubled and turbulent. I did not know where I'd been or where I was going. All I could see was brief relief in getting high (and the twinges of guilt and physical pain that frequently followed).

These days I am abstinent and stable. For the most part, I accept my illnesses and their symptoms. I've come a long way in recovery I still have plenty of problems in my life, but I am happier and healthier than ever before. Sometimes it feels like a miracle. I am deeply grateful to my higher power.

I will stop twice in my day to say a prayer of thanks.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture....

~ Johann Wolfgang Goethe ~

Recovery is a serious process, but it doesn’t have to be grim or totally lacking in humor. Nobody ever said we can’t have fun and enjoy life along the way. In fact, newcomers often comment on their sur-prise at hearing so much hearty laughter at Twelve Step meetings.

But fun isn’t always waiting for us. Often we have to find it or make it for ourselves. But that’s an easy job now. Every day has quirky little moments we can enjoy and appreciate, funny incidents that can change our day from gray to sunny. When we’re feeling a little down we can lift our mood by calling a friend who’s always good for a laugh. We may be lucky enough to know someone in the program who shares our pain in a funny way. Then, refreshed, we can attend to the serious and important business of recovery. Humor has a way of giving us perspective. We see we’re not alone, and laughter lets out tension and in its place we let in energy to face what the day has in store for us.

Today help me recognize the joy that is all around me. Help me find thejiin in my day.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Wisdom is not a product of schooling but of the lifelong attempt to acquire it.

~ Albert Einstein ~

There will be times in your recovery when you need to protect yourself from the demands or bad influences of others. To do this, you need to develop the wisdom in knowing when and how to set boundaries.

You first need to become aware of what you will and will not accept from others. Pay close attention to those who make you feel uncomfortable in any way. Also, become more aware of those who make demands upon your time and energy, or who seem to be taking advantage of your giving nature. You will need to set boundaries and learn how to say no to their requests.

If you choose to communicate with these people, keep your voice calm. If you feel having a conversation might escalate the situation, try to distance yourself from this person. If this is someone in your fellowship, attend different meetings for a while. If this is someone with whom you regularly interact, practice meditation techniques so you can be as calm as possible whenever you are together. And if this is someone with whom you share property or the care of children, enlist the help of a mediator or lawyer.

I will set boundaries with others so I can maintain focus and commitment to my recovery.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

You might as well live.

~ Dorothy Parker ~

Many times we may have thought of quitting this life. We may have experienced close friends or a relative who chose such an end. But suicide isn't a resolution, it's a stop in midsentence. Running away from any pain, whether it be by suicide, drinking or using, or denial, may make distance—but not decisions.

Every life has its hard times, its pitfalls. To feel pain or go through hard times doesn't mean we've got to be hermits. It means we need to seek comfort, compassion, understanding.

When one person in the program is in pain, there are hundreds of others ready to guide that person to peace and serenity. We can let ourselves be guided by those around us.

Tonight, I can remember I am not the only person who has ever felt pain.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Feeling alive

Not one of us has tasted the success of our sobriety and cleanness until we have awakened to a glorious day. It is made up of boundless energy, limitless joy, and knowing that whatever our Higher Power wills for us is good.

It tastes of spring to meet the day with the thrill of being alive. On these days we can feel a true spiritual joy that comes from feeling like a corpuscle in the body of our Higher Power.

Do I savor life?

Thank you, Higher Power, for this day. Whatever your will is for me, I know it is good.

I will enjoy being alive today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Our emotions are neither primitive nor "natural," but rather intelligent constructions.

~ ROBERT C. SOLOMON ~

Newcomer

I went out for coffee after a meeting with a group I didn't know. Two people, one on either side of me, talked with each other without including me. They chatted about things they'd done together and then made plans for getting together. I felt excluded. I guess I still don't know how to become part of a group. Am I being too sensitive?

Sponsor

Too sensitive? You are sensitive, and that's a gift. You notice what's going on around you. You notice what you're feeling.

Not every get-together makes us feel more a part of things, especially when people pair off for conversations. Many of us in recovery are still learning how to act in social situations, and we're not always open and thoughtful.

If we're having trouble reaching out to others, we need to give ourselves plenty of time. Social and relationship skills aren't learned overnight. And sometimes, no matter how friendly and open we ourselves are willing to be, those we're sitting with just don't seem to want to respond. It happens, both in and out of the program. Our object can be to have as good a time as possible and to decide whether or not we want to try spending social time with these people again.

Today, I'm willing to treat new social experiences as a way to practice skills of relating to others.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Probably the first permanent benefit we received in AA was received when we undertook a personal inventory of ourselves. Then for the first time our faults were dragged out into the open where we could meet them face to face and endeavor to do something about them.

Had we not recognized these defects we would never have taken steps to eradicate them. It is dead certain that if we still had them in the same degree, we would not now be sober. It was a definite step toward getting wise to ourselves.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

To Go Outdoors Each Day

Grant me, O Lord, the ability to be alone.
May it be my custom to go outdoors each day
Among the trees and grasses,
Among all growing things.
And there may I be alone,
And enter into prayer
To talk with You,
The One I belong to.

~ by Rabbi Nachman ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

LEAN BACK ON LIFE

Mental relaxation is just as important as right mental activity. Wise relaxation and wise activity are the balanced poles of all true action. Many people are constantly subjecting their minds to totally unnecessary wear and tear.

We speak colloquially of "taking the train" somewhere and actually many people who ride in trains do take the train mentally the whole journey. Many years ago I noticed that when a train arrives in the terminal after a long run, the locomotive men always seem to come off the train looking fresher than most of the passengers; although they have been working and the passengers have not. The explanation is that for the engineer and fireman it was only a routine day's work. They did not "take the train" mentally—they let the engine take it.

The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms. . . (Deuteronomy 33:27).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Thanksliving

Praise the bridge that carried you over.

~ George Colman, the Younger ~

As I look back over my life, I recognize that everything that has ever happened to me has contributed to the person I am now. While I have gone through different professions, living situations, travels, and relationships, I see that each of them bestowed me with a gift. Even the painful or difficult times taught me lessons that make me a better person now. All of it has been a blessing.

It is important that we hold our past in a sense of reverence, along with the people we have known. If we resent our former spouse, employer, or friends, we are tied to the pain and unable to move forward. The hardship of the past will stay with us until we find a way to make it a gift; then it will empower us to move ahead.

Make a list of significant past events and relationships, and next to each entry note the gifts you received from that person or experience. If you are willing to find the good, you will. Assume that everyone who shows up in your life is here to bless you in some way. The other person may not know their role in your awakening, and they may serve you in ways quite unrelated to the reason you thought you interacted with them. Spirit’s intentions go far beyond human planning.

Then write a note or letter of gratitude to each person on your list. Thank them for the gifts they brought to your life, and specifically describe how you have grown and improved your life as a result of your interaction with them. Be sure to include those who challenged you. While this writing is for your own illumination, you may send letters to the people when appropriate. By the time you finish your writing, you will be bursting with so much peace and joy that you will wonder how you could have ever thought anyone was your enemy.

Gratitude is the key to happiness; apply it to your past, and you will find friends you never knew you had.

Show me the gifts I have overlooked, and fill my heart with gratitude for all my blessings.

Everyone and everything in my life is a gift from God.