Welcome to the site ashm. Thank you for sharing. There is a lot of recovery material here and I hope you will continue to come and share with us.
For me, it was one day at a time. Just for today, I choose not to use, no matter what and praying for the good orderly direction to see me through the next twenty-four hours. Give thanks for a day clean and sober and wake up and start a new day. It wasn't about the past, it was about who I wanted to be in today. I had to deal with the path as it came up, with the help of a sponsor and working the 12 Steps. I did what was suggested, go to meetings, get a home group, get a sponsor (a temporary one until I connected with one I could relate to), and learn to apply the Steps to my life one day at a time.
If you are new, you need to work on Step One. Forgiveness, defects of character, and past issue come in Steps 4-9. The program worked for me. I still live it one day at a time. Each day is a new beginning, a start toward who my God would have me be in today.