[bluidkiti]

February 5

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Let there be spaces in your togetherness. --Kahlil Gibran
Sometimes it is just as important to know when to leave others alone as it is to know when to talk with them. We all need to be alone at times--to think, to work out a problem, or just to be quiet with ourselves. This is especially true in families, where we're often surrounded by others. If we tune in to our other family members, we can develop sensors that will let us know when they need some time alone. Part of good communication is knowing when not to talk, too.
Can I be sensitive to my family's needs for privacy today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The human animal needs a freedom seldom mentioned: freedom from intrusion. He needs a little privacy quite as much as he wants understanding or vitamins or exercise or praise. --Phyllis McGinley
The boundaries between us in our families and our friendships often need to be reshaped in recovery. We need to know our feelings are private. We reveal them at our choosing, with whom we choose. We give up on mind reading or probing because it intrudes upon another's privacy. We actively engage in our relationships by sharing ourselves and listening to each other.
A secret that makes a relationship dishonest is destructive and ought to be told. But we cannot force another person to be honest, or pry the truth from a loved one. We can only be honest ourselves and guard our own right to privacy. Intimacy is the bridge, which is built between two separate people. Only when we let others have their privacy and we take ours can our relationships be more intimate.
I will maintain the boundaries of my privacy today and respect the right of others to do the same.


You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go.
Financial Responsibility
We are responsible for ourselves financially.
What a frightening, grown up thought that is for many of us - taking responsibility for money and our financial affairs. For many of us, handing over responsibility for our financial affairs has been part of a codependent trade off in our relationships.
Some of our emotional dependency on others, on this tight tie that binds us to others, not in love, but in need and desperation, is directly related to financial dependency. Our fears and reluctance to take responsibility for our financial affairs can be a barrier to the freedom we're seeking in recovery.
Financial responsibility is an attitude. Money goes out to pay for necessities and luxuries. Money must come in, in order to go out. How much needs to come in to equal that which is going out?
Taxes... savings plans...appropriate spending habits that demonstrate an attitude of financial responsibility.... Part of being alive means learning to handle money. Even if we have a healthy contract with someone that allows us to depend on him or her for money, we still need to understand how money works. We still need to adopt an attitude of financial responsibility for ourselves. Even if we have a contract with someone else to provide for our financial needs, we need to understand the workings of the money earned and spent in our life.
Self-esteem will increase when we increase our sense of being financially responsible for ourselves. We can start where we are, with what we have today.
God, help me become willing to let go of my fears and reluctance to face the necessary parts of handling money responsibly in my life. Shaw me the lessons I need to learn about money.


It feels terrific letting go of perfection as my goal. As I let go of my judgments, all parts of me come together and I feel complete. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey To The Heart

Learn to Live with Unfinished Projects

Whether your project is sewing a dress, reading a book, writing a book, building a home, or learning a lesson on your journey, learn to live comfortably with unfinished work. Whatever you’re working on, whatever you’re in the midst of doesn’t need to be finished, in perfect order, with all the loose ends in place for you to be happy.

For too many years, we worried and fretted, denying ourselves happiness until we could see the whole picture, learn the entire lesson, cross every t and dot each i. That meant we spend a lot of stressful time waiting for that one moment when the project was complete.

Enjoy all the stages of the process you’re in. The first moments when the germ of the idea finds you. The time before you begin, when the seed lies dormant in the ground, getting ready to grow. The beginning, and all the days throughout the middle. Those bleak days, when it looks like you’re stuck and won’t break through. Those exciting days when the project, the lesson, the life you’re building takes shape and form.

Be happy now. Enjoy the creative process– the process of creating your life, yourself, and the project you’re working on–today. Don’t wait for those finishing moments to take pleasure in your work and your life. Find joy all along the way.

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More Language Of Letting Go

Stare in the face of your fears

Examine your fears.

Sometimes we’re afraid of specific things. Sometimes we fear the unknown. And sometimes we’re just afraid, because that’s the way we usually feel.

Are you nervous, anxious,upset? What’s scaring you right now?

Have a little talk with yourself. Take a look at what you fear. Are you starting a new relationship or job? What are the risks? What’s the worse that could possibly happen? Sometimes it helps to go through our fears, one by one. We don’t need to dwell on the negative, but we need to be certain that we’re willing to take responsibility for the risks involved.

Then look in the other direction, and see the entire positive potential there. What can you gain by taking that risk? Does the thrill of victory outweigh the potential loss?

We may emerge from the list saying, No, I choose not to risk that. Or, we may look at the risks and say, Yes, I’ve been through worse. I can handle this,too.

Someone once told me many years ago that fear was a good thing. “If you’re not feeling afraid, it means you’re not doing anything differently. You’re just repeating the same old thing.” If fear is haunting you, stare it in the face. See what’s making you feel afraid. Then either back off, or stare that fear down.

God, help me sort through my fears,one by one. Then guide me in deciding which risks I want to take. Help me not be foolhardy. But help me let go of timidity,too.

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Intertwined Fates
We Are All Connected

by Madisyn Taylor

Being aware of the connection between all things can help you in terms of the broader effect you may be creating.


There are times when we may feel disconnected from the world. Our actions can seem like they are of no major consequence, and we may feel like we exist in our own vacuum. Yet, the truth is that our simplest thought or action - the decisions we make each day, and how we see and relate to the world - can be incredibly significant and have a profound impact on the lives of those around us, as well as the world at large. The earth and everything on it is bound by an invisible connection between people, animals, plants, the air, the water, and the soil. Insignificant actions on your part, whether positive or negative, can have an impact on people and the environment that seem entirely separate from your personal realm of existence. Staying conscious of the interconnection between all things can help you think of your choices and your life in terms of the broader effect you may be creating.

Think of buying a wooden stool. The wood was once part of a tree which is part of a forest. A person was paid to fell the tree, another to cut the wood, and yet another to build the stool. Their income may have had a positive effect on their families, just as the loss of the tree may have had a negative impact on the forest or the animals that made that tree their home. An encouraging word to a young child about their special talent can influence this person to develop their gift so that one day their inventions can change the lives of millions. A poem written “merely” to express oneself can make a stranger reading it online from thousands of miles away feel less alone because there is someone else out there who feels exactly the way they do.

Staying conscious of your connection to all things can help you think of your choices in terms of their impact. We are powerful enough that what we do and say can reverberate through the lives of people we may never meet. Understanding that you are intimately connected with all things and understanding your power to affect our world can be the first step on the road to living more consciously. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

If I am troubled, worried, exasperated or frustrated, do I tend to rationalize the situation and lay the blame on someone else? When I am in such a state, is my conversation punctuated with, :Hey did..,” “She said..,” “They did..”? Or can I honestly admit that perhaps I’m at fault. My peace of mind depends on overcoming toward rationalization. Will I try, day by day, to be rigorously honest with myself?

Today I Pray

May I catch myself as I talk in the third person, “He did…” or “They promised…” or “She said shoe would…” and listen for the blaming that has become such a pattern for me and preserves delusion. May I do a turnabout and face myself instead.

Today I Will Remember

Honesty is the only policy.

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One More Day

We have seen better days.
– Shakespeare

It is quit difficult to define some of the components that help create what we interpret as a good day. A general sense of well-being prevails, and we have a tendency to look at the world through rose-colored glasses. Everything seems to go just right.

It is not the least bit hard, however, to define a bad day. Nothing happens according to plan. We feel out of sorts, not particularly well. With the advent of health changes, we can inadvertently allow many days to become bad ones.

The only way we can stop having negative experiences is to change our expectations of what constitutes a good day. We don’t have to lower our expectations, just make them more realistic for the situation at hand. We will then find that most of our days can be good ones.

My life is and will always be a mixture of good and bad days. I can influence my interactions and thereby influence the color of my days.