Quote:
Myself
I have to live with myself and so
I want to be fit for myself to know.
I want to be able as days go by,
always to look myself straight in the eye;
I don't want to stand with the setting sun
and hate myself for the things I have done.
I don't want to keep on a closet shelf
a lot of secrets about myself
and fool myself as I come and go
into thinking no one else will ever know
the kind of person I really am,
I don't want to dress up myself in sham.
I want to go out with my head erect
I want to deserve all men's respect;
but here in the struggle for fame and wealth
I want to be able to like myself.
I don't want to look at myself and know that
I am bluster and bluff and empty show.
I never can hide myself from me;
I see what others may never see;
I know what others may never know,
I never can fool myself and so,
whatever happens I want to be
self respecting and conscience free.
- - Edgar A. Guest
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In early recovery, I heard a woman ask a long-timer, how come you still come to meetings, your husband has passed away, and he passed away sober? She replied, "I still have to live with myself."
This is a family disease. Even if I wasn't an alcoholic myself and needing my own recovery from my disease, I need to recover from my dis-ease of growing up in an alcoholic home. I need to recover from the dis-ease from within me that I had long before I picked up my first drink.
I need the program for myself, not just for the alcoholic/addict in my life. Recovery is for me. It gave me back my self-respect, self-esteem, self-worth, self-acceptance, etc.
Love yourself, the 12 Steps are a blueprint to happiness and freedom.
