Daily Practice - April

[bluidkiti]

April 1

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 75,76
Ch- Into Action
Step 6-
Returning home we find a place where we can be quiet for an hour, carefully reviewing what we have done. We thank God from the bottom of our heart that we know Him better. Taking this book down from the shelf we turn to the page which contains the 12 steps. Carefully reading the first five proposals we ask if we have omitted anything, for we are building an arch through which we will walk a free man at last. Is our work solid so far? Are the stones properly in place? Have we skimped on the cement put into the foundation? Have we tried to make mortar without sand?
If we can answer to our satisfaction, we then look at Step Six. We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable. Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable? Can He now take them all—every one? If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask God to help us be willing.

-Tom- some steps take a lot of time to do, like 4,9,12. Steps 6 and 7 take one hour and a prayer.
One day in early sobriety (I had been through all the steps and was practicing 10,11,12 about 6 months sober)I sat in an A.A. meeting house writing; identifying and coming up with ways i was going to work on my character defects. For about 2 hours. An old
timer/friend, Pete N, came up and asked me what I was working on. I proudly showed him all my work and my plans. He said wow that’s a lot of work, I smiled and said thank you.
Then he said, “now Tom what I want you to do is throw all that waist of time in the garbage on your way to your truck.
Miss Mary still needs her grass cut, 5th steps need to be received out at the Colony and you need to speak at the prison tonight. Why don’t you try trusting in God, cleaning house and helping others first. Now get out of there and Live sober instead of pretending to be.”
I told him he was such an asshole, slammed the door on my way out, did what he said to do, and learned a lesson of a Lifetime, doing sober actions is what makes me sober.
I pray that today I have the Willingness to do sober actions.

[bluidkiti]

April 2

Practice of the Day BB pg XVii
Foreword to the Second edition:
Hence the two men set to work almost frantically upon alcoholics arriving in the ward of the Akron City Hospital. Their very first case, a desperate one. recovered immediately and became A.A. number three. He never had another drink. This work at Akron continued through the summer of 1935. There were many failures, but there was an occasional heartening success. When the broker returned to New York in the fall of 1935, the first A.A. group had actually been formed, though no one realized it at the time.
A second small group promptly took shape at New York, to be followed in 1937 with the start of a third at Cleveland. Besides these, there were scattered alcoholics who had picked up the basic ideas in Akron or New York who were trying to form groups in other cities. By late 1937, the number of members having substantial sobriety time behind them was sufficient to convince the membership that a new light had entered the dark world of the alcoholic.
It was now time, the struggling groups thought, to place their message and unique experience before the world. This determination bore fruit in the spring of 1939 by the publication of this volume. The membership had then reached about 100 men and women. The fledgling society, which had been nameless, now began to be called Alcoholics Anonymous, from the title of its own book. The flying-blind period ended and A.A. entered a new phase of its pioneering time.

-Tom- before there was any AA, there was only jails, institutions and death for alcoholics and addicts.
Recovery didn’t exist in large numbers.
The First 100 recovered alcoholics brought Light into this dark world.
Today I pray that I remember all the hard work that others have done to provide me an opportunity to be sober.

[bluidkiti]

April 3

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 66-67-
Ch 5- How It Works:
We turned back to the list, for it held the key to the future. We were prepared to look at it from an entirely different angle. We began to see that the world and its people really dominated us. In that state, the wrong-doing of others, fancied or real, had power to actually kill. How could we escape? We saw that these resentments must be mastered, but how? We could not wish them away any more than alcohol.
This was our course: We realized that the people who wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick.
Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too. We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend. When a person offended we said to ourselves, "This is a sick man. How can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done."
We avoid retaliation or argument. We wouldn't treat sick people that way. If we do, we destroy our chance of being helpful. We cannot be helpful to all people, but at least God will show us how to take a kindly and tolerant view of each and every one.

-Tom- I remember the first time I practiced the 4th Step prayer for when I was offended.
I was in the 82nd’s static line Jumpmaster course in the early 90s. One of the instructors was a complete ass and had a “protector of the tab” approach, put me in his sights and offended me, on purpose, unwarranted.
My normal response (before sobriety) would be to smile at him, then find him off post on the weekend and beat his ass.
However, the thought of this paragraph jumped in my mind. So begrudgingly, halfheartedly, with attitude, I said the prayer, and it worked. I was still mad but did not feel the need or desire to retaliate. That was huge progress for a guy like me.
I pray that today I remember that I always have the Power of Choice to pray, remain quite, or leave quickly in order to not react to someone that is sick

[bluidkiti]

April 4

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 153-
Ch- A Vision For You:
It may seem incredible that these men are to become happy, respected, and useful once more. How can they rise out of such misery, bad repute and hopelessness? The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Should you wish them above all else, and be willing to make use of our experience, we are sure they will come. The age of miracles is still with us. Our own recovery proves that!
Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions. Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and march on. They will approach still other sick ones and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out.

-Tom- As my sponsor and I read through these important paragraphs, a few items stood out:
1- Should you wish them above ALL else, and be Willing to make use of our Experience, we are Sure they will come.
2. Defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions.
So I have to be defeated by Alcoholism and then put my sobriety above everything else in my Life, if I want to obtain and maintain my sobriety.
That’s The Deal.
Anything short of that will not work for me and I suspect it will not work for you either.
I pray that today I have the Courage to put my sobriety first, above everything else in my Life.

[bluidkiti]

April 5

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 151-152-
Ch 11- A Vision For You:
Now and then a serious drinker, being dry at the moment says, "I don't miss it at all. Feel better. Work better. Having a better time." As ex-problem drinkers, we smile at such a sally. We know our friend is like a boy whistling in the dark to keep up his spirits. He fools himself. Inwardly he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them. He will presently try the old game again, for he isn't happy about his sobriety. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.

-Tom- My sponsor explained to me that Sobriety, AA and the 12 Steps were serious business. If I was not serious about getting sober, don’t waist my time or his with some half ass effort. He asked me if I could relate to that paragraph? I said yes.
At 62 days without drinking, only going to meetings and reading the BB by myself, I made it to my jumping-off place.
I truly did not want to drink anymore and I wanted a drink so bad I couldn’t stand it, so I jumped. I jumped 100% and then some, into The Program and Fellowship of AA.
That is the Only reason why, I am Sober today.
I can ask myself “am I happy about my sobriety?”
If your answer is yes, then Continue and help another Alcoholic to achieve sobriety.
If your answer is no, then realize you are in a dangerous spot. Write a Gratitude list, pray to your Higher Power, meet with your sponsor, do some Steps, go to a meeting and help another alcoholic to achieve sobriety. At the end of that, I guarantee you will be happy about your sobriety.
Today I pray for the Strength to practice these Principles in all of my affairs.

[bluidkiti]

April 6

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 66-
Ch 5- How It Works:
It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that it is fatal. For when harboring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die.
If we were to live, we had to be free of anger. The grouch and the brainstorm were not for us. They may be the dubious luxury of normal men, but for alcoholics these things are poison.

-Tom- my sponsor asked me “is it plain to you that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness?”
I said “what does futility mean? He said it means pointless or useless.
I said well my driving force for the majority of my success was based off of anger, rage, resentment and revenge. Those were things that worked for me and gave me purpose, Power and control.
He said “yes that was true and worked for you in the past, but is it working for you now?”
I said, no, I am just mad all the time, have to get drunk, and then hurt people that I Love, then have to get drunk again.
So he asked me the question again “is it plain to you that your life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness?”
Then I said “yes, it is plain to me, that is True.
But I don’t know what else to do or how to live any other way”
He said, “that’s ok. The reason we are reading this book and following the Directions is so that you will have a different way to Live, without drinking”
I can ask myself “ am I following the Directions in the BB and attempting to Live differently?”
If your answer is yes, then Continue walking down the Broad Highway.
If your answer is no, then understand that there is no mystery in why it won’t work. If we want something different, we have to do something different.

[bluidkiti]

April 7

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 153-
Ch- A Vision For You:
It may seem incredible that these men are to become happy, respected, and useful once more. How can they rise out of such misery, bad repute and hopelessness? The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Should you wish them above all else, and be willing to make use of our experience, we are sure they will come. The age of miracles is still with us. Our own recovery proves that!
Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions. Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and march on. They will approach still other sick ones and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out.

-Tom- As my sponsor and I read through these important paragraphs, a few items stood out
1- Should you wish them above ALL else, and be Willing to make use of our Experience, we are Sure they will come.
2. Defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions.
So I have to be defeated by Alcoholism and then put my sobriety above everything else in my Life, if I want to obtain and maintain my sobriety.
That’s The Deal. Anything short of that will not work for me and I suspect it will not work for you either, if you are like me.
I pray that today I have the Courage to put my sobriety first, above everything else in my Life.

[bluidkiti]

April 8

Practice of the day-
BB pg 164
Ch-A Vision For You:
Still you may say: “But I will not have the benefit of contact with you who write this book.” We cannot be sure. God will determine that, so you must remember that your real reliance is always upon Him. He will show you how to create the fellowship you crave.*
Our book is meant to be suggestive only. We realize we know only a little. God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. The answers will come, if your own house is in order. But obviously you cannot transmit something you haven’t got. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us.

-Tom- at certain times in my Path of Sobriety, they were very lonely and the fear of not being able to stay sober long term hovered in the corners of my mind. I held the words in these paragraphs close to my Heart and Continued to Trudge and chose blind faith that they were true. Through TIME ;
T- things
I- I
M- must
E- earn
I experienced that every word was true.
I have experienced great events for me and countless others, that brought me Joy. All I have to do is make sure my Relationship with My Higher Power is in order and follow Directions.
I can ask myself, “is my relationship Right between me and my Higher Power?”
If the answer is yes, then I Continue moving down my Path.
If the answer is no, or I don’t know, then I need to stop, write a Gratitude list, talk with my sponsor and get it right.
I pray that just for today, I keep it Simple and do The Deal.

[bluidkiti]

April 9

Practice for the day-
BB pg 62-63,
Ch 5- How it Works:
(some of the 3rd step promises)
“This is the how and why of it. First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn’t work. Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.
When we sincerely took such a position, all sorts of remarkable things followed. We had a new Employer. Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well. Established on such a footing we became less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life. As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter.
We were reborn.”

Tom- I can look at these promises and ask myself “are these occurring in my Life, right now?” If the answer is yes, then I Continue. If the answer is no, then I must stop and
re-position myself, do some work on me and my attitude, then Continue.
Salvation is Free, Sobriety is not- it must be worked for on a daily basis.
Today I pray for the Strength to Do my work in AA

[bluidkiti]

April 10

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 154-155-
Ch 11-A Vision For You
Of course he couldn’t drink, but why not sit hopefully at a side table, a bottle of ginger ale before him? After all, had he not been sober for six months now? Perhaps he could handle, say, three drinks—no more! Fear gripped him. He was on thin ice. Again it was that old, insidious, insanity—that first drink. With a shiver he turned away and walked down the lobby to the church directory. Music and gay chatter still floated to him from the bar.
But what about his responsibilities—his family and the men who would die because they would not know how to get well, ah—yes, those other alcoholics? There must be many such in this town. He would phone a clergyman. His sanity returned and he thanked God. Selecting a church at random from the directory, he stepped into a booth and lifted the receiver.

-Tom- Remember there was no AA in this part of the story. Bill searched the churches for drunks, then helped them. The one he found ended up being Dr Bob.
I remember wanting to stay sober so so bad, and then got drunk. So wanting to didn’t work.
I remember Needing to stay sober for an event, deadline, job or special family occasion, but got drunk. So Needing to stay sober didn’t work.
So wanting and needing to stay sober didn’t keep me sober.
What keeps me sober is DOING the things that sober alcoholics in AA do, no matter how I feel. It was a relief to me to know I didn’t have to feel like doing it or wanting to do it, I just had to do it and as a byproduct, I would stay sober.
Today I pray that I have the Courage to Trust in my God, clean my house and help others.

[bluidkiti]

April 11

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 21
Ch 2-There is a Solution:
Here is the fellow that has been puzzling you, especially in his lack of control. He does absurd, incredible, tragic things while drinking. He is a real Dr Jekyll and Mr Hide. He is seldom mildly intoxicated. He is always more or less insanely drunk. His disposition while drinking resembles his normal nature but little. He may be one of the finest fellows in the world. Yet let him drink for a day, and he frequently becomes disgustingly, and even dangerously
anti-social. He has a positive genius for getting tight at exactly the wrong moment, particularly when some important decision must be made or engagement kept. He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly dishonest and selfish. He often possesses special abilities, skills and aptitudes, and has a promising career ahead of him. He uses his gifts to build up a bright outlook for his family and himself, and then pulls the structure down on his head by a senseless series of sprees........

-Tom- my sponsor would often stop and ask me if I could relate to the what we read. He said it was very important because if I could not relate to what we were reading and talking about, why would I continue?
Another reason why it is important for me to relate is because I suffer from
Terminal Uniqueness.
Terminal Uniqueness requires that I cannot relate to anyone and no one or nothing can relate to me. It sounds like this “you don’t know me, you don’t understand what I’ve been through, this will never work, you just don’t get it, I am different, my issues are different than yours, I’m just too damaged.......etc”
All my life, I had looked for the “differences”, and I found them.
Sobriety taught me to discard the differences and look for the “similarities”, and I found them.
Whatever I am “looking for”, I will find.
I pray that today I look for similarities and not just pick out the differences.

[bluidkiti]

April 12

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 55-
Ch 4- We Agnostics
We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our make-up, just as much as the feeling we have for a friend. Sometimes we had to search fearlessly, but He was there. He was as much a fact as we were. We found the Great Reality deep down within us. In the last analysis it is only there that He may be found. It was so with us.
We can only clear the ground a bit. If our testimony helps sweep away prejudice, enables you to think honestly, encourages you to search diligently within yourself, then, if you wish, you can join us on the Broad Highway. With this attitude you cannot fail. The consciousness of your belief is sure to come to you.

-Tom- for me, these are 2 of the most Powerful paragraphs in the BB.
They talk about the one place, I had never looked, to find My Higher Power:
Within myself.
My motivation was that I wanted to join them “on the Broad Highway “ stay sober and live differently.
However there are listed requirements I had to commit to:
-sweep away prejudice
-think honestly
-search diligently within myself
But they promised:
With this attitude you cannot fail. The consciousness of your belief is sure to come to you.
So I gave it a whole Hearted shot, and it worked. The consciousness of My Belief came to me for the first time in my Life.
Today I pray that I am given the Willingness to put in the Work, my sobriety requires.

[bluidkiti]

April 13

Practice of the Day-
BB pg-84-
Ch -6- Into Action:
This thought brings us to Step Ten, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along. We vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past. We have entered the world of the Spirit. Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime. Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code.

-Tom- my Sponsor and I spent a lot of time on this one paragraph. It contains the directions for how to live my Life once I finish with my 11th Step “upon awakening.....” .He told me many people think they know what the 10th Step means but there are actually 4 action items in this Step.
The 10th step, on the wall reads:
Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
However, as with all the Steps, there are more directions on how to actually do them.
Notice it says “when” these crop up, not “if”;
Selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear.
When these occur, here are the actions within the 10th Step, it says to do:
1. Ask my God, at once to remove them
2. Discuss with someone immediately
3. Make amends quickly, if I have harmed someone
4. Resolutely turn my thoughts to someone we can help.
Cleaning my House is one thing (Steps 4 through 9)
Keeping it clean is another (Steps 10-11)
Today I pray that I continue to grow and learn in the Basics of our Design for Living.

[bluidkiti]

April 14

Practice of the day- BB pg 14-15-
Ch-1- Bills Story
“While I lay in the hospital the thought came that there were thousands of hopeless alcoholics who might be glad to have what had been so freely given me. Perhaps I could help some of them. They in turn might work with others.
My friend had emphasized the absolute necessity of demonstrating these principles in all my affairs. Particularly was it imperative to work with others as he had worked with me. Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then Faith would be dead indeed.
With us it is just like that.”

-Tom- The first 100 constantly bring up the Truth that sobriety is not free. “Through work and self-sacrifice for others” that’s not just work, that is hard work, difficult and takes up my time.
And that is the Deal, I can take it or leave it, but I cannot change it.
I can ask myself “ am I working to enlarge my Spiritual Life in the way the Steps say to?”
If the answer is yes, then I continue.
If the answer is no, then I need to call my sponsor and get to work.
I pray that for today I am given the Desire to enlarge my Spiritual Life and sacrifice my time for others, to the best of my ability.

[bluidkiti]

April 15

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 31-
Ch 3- More About Alcoholism:
Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums-we could increase the list ad infinitum.

-Tom- My sponsor asked me if I had ever tried any of these methods? I said yes, most of them and some that were not on that particular list.
He asked me does your drinking cause problems for you in your life? I said yes, pretty much any major problems going on in my life are because of what happens when I drink.
He asked, then why don’t you just stop drinking?
I said at first I didn’t stop because I didn’t want to, now it’s because I can’t stop.
He said, that’s because alcohol is not your problem, it’s your only solution. So when you stop drinking you are stopping your solution and are only left with your problem.
Made logical sense to me and was absolutely accurate.
Today I pray for the ability to seek the Solution for my problem, which is found in The Program and The Fellowship of A.A.