Wisdom For Today - December

[bluidkiti]

December 18

Wisdom for Today

"A searching and fearless moral inventory..." These are the instructions given us in Step Four, but that word "moral" troubled me. Just what was meant by this word? I guess I struggled with the meaning of this word because I had never thought of myself as moral. In fact, I needed to look up the meaning of this word in a dictionary because I had no concept of what was meant by moral. What I discovered was that morals are guiding principles of right and wrong. In my active addiction I guess I just didn't care if I was moral or not. What this step was asking me to look at was what was right and what was wrong with the principles of my life.
Finding what was wrong was going to be easy because there was so much wrong. The principle that guided my life in addiction was that of self-centeredness. Everything was about me. I did everything the way I wanted. It didn't matter whom I stepped on or how I accomplished the task of self-pleasure. I turned my life over to the care of alcohol and drugs. I watched them slowly destroy anything of value in my life. At least that is what I thought, but this step did not allow me to stop there. I also had to look for what was right in my life. This was the hard part, I judged myself so severely. But in searching through the rubble of my life, I did find that I indeed had some redeeming qualities. There was good in me after all. I did do some things right. Buried deep inside was another principle that guided me to do that which was right. It was buried so deep I had a hard time finding it. I had lost touch with the force in my life that guided my conscious to do what was good and right. Am I looking for both the right and wrong in my life?

Meditations for the Heart

Looking back at my life, it is easy to see that God was always there for me. He managed to protect me from the insanity of my illness and did not allow me to totally destroy my life. Even though there were times that I should have been dead, God kept me breathing. He saw the good that was buried under the rubble and saw in me what I could not see in myself. It was an act of grace that this occurred. I did nothing to deserve this grace, yet I was given another chance. Today I try to seek after God's will for me. I know this is what is right for me; and it is the principle I use to guide my decisions, my behavior, and my desires. I am nowhere near perfect and still fall on my face at times. The good news is that God is still there to pick me up and redirect me. Recovery is not about being perfect, but about the pursuit of progress. What are the principles that I am using to guide my life today?

Petitions to my Higher Power

God,
Today I do have a sense of what is right and what is wrong. Help me to develop my moral convictions to seek after Your will for me. Provide me with the power to carry out Your will. Let me seek out that which is healthy for me physically, emotionally and spiritually as I walk through this day.
Amen.