More Recovery Readings - July

[bluidkiti]

July 6

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
In uplifting, get underneath. --George Ade
A sandpile in the summer is deceiving. The topmost sand burns hot on our
feet. But as we push down toward the center, we come to a damp, cool
place that soothes and oozes between our toes.
The nature of most things is not revealed at the surface. Like the
sandpile, many people and situations we encounter are, on the surface,
downright uncomfortable. The reward is in digging deeper--to the
essential goodness, the core or meaning, the true friend. It takes time,
a little knowledge, and abundant trust that we will not be burned.
What have I discovered by digging a little lately?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
We shall describe conditions of the soul that words can only hint at. We shall have to use logic to try to corner perspectives that laugh at our attempt. --Huston Smith
As we live the spiritual life, we find words and logic are only capable of pointing in the direction of some truths. Words do not contain the entire truth our experience may be teaching us. This is like the difference between hearing about fishing versus actually being on the water, smelling the misty air, and feeling the fish tug on our line.
Spiritual development is a form of education. We are developing the part of us that learns by experience, that has a feeling without exactly knowing why, that understands stories better than statistics. Gradually, we accept more experiences in our lives as mysteries, as not fitting into any specific categories. Many experiences will have more meaning than cold facts could ever express. As this side of us develops, we don't discard reason and judgment; we become deeper human beings.
Today, I will give my intuition more freedom. That will help my spiritual self grow.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
There are really only two ways to approach life--as victim or as gallant fighter--and you must decide if you want to act or react, deal your own cards or play with a stacked deck. And if you don't decide which way to play with life, it always plays with you.
--Merle Shain
Being the victim is, or was, uncomfortably familiar to many of us. Perhaps some of us are only now realizing we have choices, that we need not let life happen to us. Becoming responsible to ourselves, choosing behavior, beliefs, friends, activities, that please us, though unfamiliar at first, soon exhilarates us. The more choices we make, the more alive we feel. The more alive we feel, the healthier our choices.
Our aim is recovery. Recovering means participating fully in our lives. It means self-assessment and self-direction. It means trusting to move forward, step-by-step, choice-by-choice, knowing all the while that no thoughtful action can trouble us.
Many opportunities to make choices will present themselves today. The choices I make will satisfy me; they will move me toward my goal of recovery.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Survivor Guilt
We begin recovering. We begin taking care of ourselves. Our recovery program starts to work in our life, and we begin to feel good about ourselves.
Then it hits. Guilt.
Whenever we begin to experience the fullness and joy of life, we may feel guilty about those we've left behind - those not recovering, those still in pain. This survivor guilt is a symptom of codependency.
We may think about the husband we've divorced who is still drinking. We may dwell on a child, grown or adult, still in pain. We may get a phone call from a nonrecovering parent who relates his or her misery to us. And we feel pulled into their pain.
How can we feel so happy, so good, when those we love are still in misery? Can we really break away and lead satisfying lives, despite their circumstances? Yes, we can.
And yes, it hurts to leave behind those we love. But keep moving forward anyway. Be patient. Other people's recovery is not our job. We cannot make them recover. We cannot make them happy.
We may ask why we were chosen for a fuller life. We may never know the answer. Some may catch up in their own time, but their recovery is not our business. The only recovery we can truly claim is our own.
We can let go of others with love, and love ourselves without guilt.
Today, I am willing to work through my sadness and guilt. I will let myself be healthy and happy, even though someone I love has not chosen the same path.


I am very grateful to be exactly where I am today. I do not need to be a victim of my past or controlled by circumstances. I am in recovery today and it feels wonderful! --Ruth Fishel

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Journey To The Heart

See How Each Soul Has Touched You

Often in our lives, we don’t realize the significance of a relationship until later, when the experience has passed. Then we understand how the person helped us along the way, took us to the next part of our journey, opened us up to begin learning the next lesson. And we see how we, in turn, helped shape that person.

One evening, as I was readying for sleep, I had a vision. I saw clearly before me a scenario of the dance we do with each other. I saw in my heart, understood deeply, the tangible, shaping impact each soul had on my life. Each moment, each interaction with another person, had been important– the quiet interactions, the ones I barely noticed, and the more significant relationships. Each moment– the moments that hurt, the moments that brought joy– had helped. We had touched each other. We were joined in an intricate dance, a dance in which our souls learned and grew.

And we had taken our places with each other on time, for the dance was perfectly choreographed.

I could almost see us waving gleefully to each other, happy for how we had connected, joyful that we had helped each other learn the lessons of the soul: courage, love, forgiveness, gentleness, self-love.

See how each soul touches you? See how you touch them? Ask your heart to guide you with honesty, love, and responsibility in all your encounters. Honor the sacredness of love. Honor the lessons of planet earth and the people who help you learn them.

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More Language Of Letting Go

Let the feelings go

Sometimes we get stuck on a feeling. We don’t want to acknowledge it and give it its due. So we tell ourselves we’re too intelligent or busy to feel that way. Maybe we’re scared of that feeling, afraid of what it might mean. We think if we feel that way, we’ll have to do something we don’t want to do. We’re afraid that feeling might mean we have to change. Or we think the feeling will mean we have to face a loss of something we value in our lives and don’t want to lose.

Sometimes we feel guilty about our emotions. We think it’s wrong to have that feeling; it makes us a bad person. So we tell ourselves we shouldn’t feel the way that we do.

We can become so used to a particular kind of feeling– such as anger, resentment, or fear– that it becomes a comfortable and familiar way to view our world.

We can use our feelings to control people: I feel this way when you do that, so don’t do that anymore. Some people call this using emotions to manipulate other people. It’s not a good thing to do. But some of us convince ourselves it’s the only way to get what we want.

Learn to say how it feels. Then learn to let that feeling go.

God, help me flow in the stream of my feelings.

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Food for Thought

Dual Personalities

It is as if we are each two people. When we are abstaining, we are calm, confident, and capable of handling the demands of every day. When we are in contact with our Higher Power, we have the right mental perspective and God’s peace and love in our hearts.

Slipping back into the old attitudes and habits of our compulsive overeating days brings back our frightened, confused, and despairing selves. We lose our ability to function efficiently. We are antagonistic to those around us. Worst of all, we are cut off from the source of strength and light.

Remembering that the negative personality will destroy us makes us more determined not to give in to it. Abstinence, day by day, is our safety. Reliance on the OA group, our Twelve Step program, and our Higher Power keeps us living the good, new life of freedom.

Deliver me from my negative personality.

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Interesting People Everywhere
Everyone Has a Story

by Madisyn Taylor

Every person on this planet has a story to tell, something that makes them unique adding to the whole.


It’s easy to forget sometimes that everyone has a story to tell if we take the time to listen. We are so accustomed to hearing the stories of people in the news that we sometimes lose track of the fact that the random stranger on the bus also has a fascinating story about where they came from and how they got to be where they are. The sheer variety of paths taken in this world, from farmers to CEOs to homeless people to world travelers, is indicative of how much we can learn from each individual. Sometimes the shy, quiet person at work has the most amazing life story and the biggest dreams, it is up to us to take the time to find out.

Some people travel a path of wealth and privilege, while others struggle with only themselves to rely on, and both have great stories to tell. Each person learns lessons, makes choices, and develops a unique perspective, which only they can claim and share. Even two people who have had very similar lives will have slightly different experiences, leading them to a different point of view, so each person remains a treasure trove waiting to be explored. When we take the time to ask questions and listen, we find that every person has a fascinating story to tell and an utterly unique perspective from which to tell it.

Bearing this in mind, we have the opportunity to approach the world around us in a new way. There is never any reason to be bored at a party, or on the bus, or in a conversation with a stranger. When we retain the spark of curiosity and the warmth required to open someone up, we always have in front of us the makings of a great story. All we have to do is ask. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Some people in The Program don’t feel that they can do the things they want to do. They doubt their own ability. But actually, every person has untapped ability. We’re children of God, which should give us a strong clue as to the infinite nature of our ability. As spiritual beings, we’re unlimited. True, we may find it easier to accept this as true of some person who shines in a particular field. We may compare our own accomplishments with another’s and feel discouraged. But the only comparison we need make or should make is with ourselves. Am I a better, more productive person today?

Today I Pray

May I realize that I am a child of God. And His loving-parent promise to give me what I need, not what I might want, is His way of teaching me to be what I am, not what I dreamed I should be. As a spiritual being, I can truly become a productive person – perhaps even do some of the things I once felt unable to do without the aid of props — drinks, pills, excesses of food which hulled me into false confidence.

Today I Will Remember

To compare me with the old me.

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One More Day

Yesterday is a canceled check; tomorrow is a promissory note; today is the only cash you have — so spend it wisely.
– Kay Lyons

Each day is a small fragment of a lifetime. This fact frees us to focus on the things we truly can influence. We can never return to the past, except within our memories. And we don’t know what the future holds in store. The only time we can “spend” is today; the only time we touch is right now.

The simplicity of the present allows us to let go of the past and to ignore the unknowns of the future. Thus freed, we can set about the business of enriching our lives physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Unpleasant debts to the past are paid, and we’ve mortgaged nothing to the future. We are free to invest in growth by using the “cash” we have on hand.

This day is a valuable piece of my life. I will spend it well.