If You Want What We Have

[bluidkiti]

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The flower must drink the nature of the soil before it can put forth its blossoming.
JOHN KEATS

Newcomer
I’ve had to cut back on meetings lately, because my life is so full. There’s so much to do, so much lost time to make up for. And the meetings are repetitive; I feel as if I can predict in advance what’s going to happen there.

Sponsor
It’s natural to experience fluctuation in our enthusiasm for sober routines; there are ups and downs in any relationship. At times, meetings seem like something “they” are requiring me to do, rather than something I’ve chosen. When I’m sitting there, I don’t always pay close attention. I may feel irritated by a personality, bored hearing something I think I already know, or too distracted by my thoughts to focus on principles. But I keep going anyway, and the meetings—as if by magic—get better. Suddenly, I hear exactly what I need to hear. I suspect that the problem isn’t so much with meetings ass with my attitude.

By attending meetings and making calls consistently—not just when we feel desperate—we keep the lines of communication open. That way we maintain a basis of support for ourselves and others; we can count on its being there when we it most.

I have a life now, and I am responsible for it. Today, the decision I make to maintain my recovery is my own decision. Establishing a sober routine and sticking to it is a tool for maintaining that life.