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Old 07-31-2017, 11:07 AM   #31
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July 31

Quote of the Week

“Watch out; I still have a self-destruct button."

I used to be the master of self-sabotage and self-destruct. If things were going well – or might go well – I had the knack for ruining them. Surprise party for someone close to me? I would get tight at the party and spoil it. Great job interview in the morning? I would sleep in because I celebrated too hard the night before. I foiled countless opportunities and thought my punishment was Alcoholics Anonymous.

When I was 90 days sober, at my regular Wednesday night meeting to take a chip, I left because they were out of chips. I went home and drank. I beat myself up for months over that and finally crawled back four months later. As I worked through the Steps, I continued to make mistakes, and my anger grew into rage. To my surprise, I found my rage was mainly pointed inward, and that’s when I discovered that the core characteristic of alcoholism is a deep self-loathing. That is why we can ruin so many lives and drink ourselves to death…

It has taken many years to move beyond the illusion of alcoholic hatred. What I found is that in the core of each of us is not loathing, but rather love – God’s love. Recovery means that we find this love and learn to act from it, and to share it with others. We rely on the Steps to helps us grow past the destructive impulse of the disease, but we must remain vigilant because the disease never goes away. Today, I still have a self-destructive button, but I also have the path to healing and love.

And today, because of recovery, I have the power to choose God’s love.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 08-08-2017, 04:18 AM   #32
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August 7

Quote of the Week

“Be all right with being all right.”

I was always irritable, restless, and discontent before recovery. As a kid I was anxious and afraid of things. When I found alcohol, I finally found a way to be comfortable, hopeful even. Drinking gave me that sense of ease and confidence I saw other people had. Suddenly I could dance better, talk to girls, and be one of the guys. Unfortunately, the solution soon became the problem, and I had to quit drinking.

In recovery, I felt very vulnerable without my solution. Soon all the feelings I used to drown out with alcohol were front and center. At times I thought I would be overwhelmed with them, so I did what was suggested: I took them to meetings, I shared them in fellowship, I inventoried them, and I worked the Steps on them. Sometimes it worked, but for when it didn’t, my sponsor would always bring me back to the present. He’d ask, “Are you alright right now?” “Do you have enough food, gas, money, right now?” etc.

It took a lot to corral my galloping mind and rope it back into the now. But each time I’d have to admit that yes, right now I’m all right. Right now everything is taken care of. After years of going through this exercise, I have the perspective to know that I really am all right. Problems come and go, but I’ve always survived them and have usually done just fine. What I’ve learned is that the key to my serenity is truly being all right with being all right.

And when I can remember that, my serenity returns and I can actually live happy, joyous, and free.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 08-15-2017, 05:58 AM   #33
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August 14

Quote of the Week

“Sometimes you don’t make progress, you hold on.”

When I was new in recovery, there were many days when I felt I just wasn’t going to make it. I would see others take chips and cakes on their anniversaries, and I was pretty sure I’d be drunk tomorrow. When I met with my sponsor, he told me that even if I couldn’t see the progress I was making, others could. When he saw my look of disbelief, he asked if I was sober that day. I told him I was, and he told me the program was working for me even if it didn’t feel like it.

As I made my way through the Steps, it continued to be a roller coaster ride. Sometimes the pink cloud returned and I was filled with hope and gratitude. But other times I descended into the pit of despair and felt like I was going backward. During these dark times, my sponsor told me to just hold on. “Don’t drink today, and I guarantee it will pass,” he said. And it always did.
​​​​​​​
After many years of sobriety, there are still times in life when I don’t feel as though I’m making the progress I would like. What I’ve learned is that it is okay to just hold on during these times. I have found the solution is for me to stay sober, turn things over to God, get grateful for what I do have, and be open for what His will is next for me. Each time I do this, I find that holding on is actually part of the process that leads to the progress I was hoping for.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 08-22-2017, 06:14 AM   #34
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August 21

Quote of the Week

“Does it feel sober?”

When I first got sober, the only thing that changed for me was that I no longer drank. Most everything else, though, remained the same. I still stole money at my job, cheated in my relationships, and lied to my family and myself. I still remember when I heard at a meeting, “How do you know when a newcomer is lying? When his lips are moving.” That hit home in a very uncomfortable way.

As I began navigating the new world of the Steps, I kept running into the phrase, “rigorous honesty.” At first I kept looking for ways around that, but as I did my various inventories – a fear inventory, a resentment inventory, a relationship inventory – I realized I had to finally get honest with myself if I was to have any chance at this recovery thing. It took a long time for me to overcome my tendency to be dishonest, but each time I told the truth, I felt much better.

In recovery, they say that you “grow a conscience.” I sure did. After a while, it got harder and harder to live with even little white lies, and I soon saw and felt the wisdom of being rigorously honest. Today, I know the path to freedom isn’t in getting what I want by lying, it’s in speaking my truth and being accepted for who I am. These days when I have a decision to make, I just ask myself what feels the most sober.

The answer that most resonates with my conscience is the right one.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 08-29-2017, 05:50 AM   #35
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August 28

Quote of the Week

“A mistake is only a mistake when I don’t learn from it.”

It was hard making the same mistakes over and over. Each new relationship ended just like the last one, and after a while I just resigned myself to being single the rest of my life. Same thing with jobs. Each new, exciting opportunity ended like the last disappointment, and soon I was unemployed again, searching through the Sunday classified ads. As each area of my life crashed and burned, I finally had to admit the unmanageability of it all, and I surrendered.

When I finally reached Step Four of the program and learned about the first three columns of the Fourth Step inventory, I finally thought I would be vindicated. Now I could list what others had done to me and assign the proper blame for the failure of my life. And that is when my sponsor sprung the mysterious fourth column on me – my part. What at first seemed a gross insult – “What do you mean my part? Look at what they’ve done to me!” – soon turned out to be the key to my freedom and recovery.

What I learned is that it was my character defects that were truly the cause of my repeated suffering. Just so long as I was unwilling to change how I behaved, just for that long was my life to remain unmanageable. I learned that when I finally admitted and corrected my part, that was when I could begin learning from the mistakes I was making, and move past them. Today, when something doesn’t go my way, I am quick to look at my part and to see where I have been at fault.

Doing so allows me to not only learn from it, but avoid repeating it in the future.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 09-05-2017, 04:06 AM   #36
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September 4

Quote of the Week

“You can blame them for the way you are; you can only blame yourself for staying that way.”

I had a rotten childhood. Torn away from my father when I was five, I never saw him again. Torn away from my older brothers and sister when I was seven, I rarely saw them when I was growing up. Like itinerant farm works, my mom, step dad and I moved constantly. I attended four different fifth-grades, and was always the outcast through my school years. It’s no wonder I started drinking at seventeen years old and moved out of the apartment we lived in.

When I entered recovery, I kept to myself. I had no interest in fellowship, and I was guarded when speaking to my sponsor. Revealing myself through sharing at meetings, through inventories and other Step work was terrifying to me. I was going to keep much of myself in, and secretly I was going to keep blaming others. During my Fourth Step, my mom and step dad topped the list of resentments, and I laid the responsibility squarely on them for the way I turned out. And that’s when my sponsor explained today’s quote to me.

He told me that while my parents certainly had a huge impact over the first half of my life, it was now my choice as to how the second half would go. I could either choose to remain shut down, or I could have faith, clean house, and join the human race. Sure there would be times when I felt let down, hurt, or disrespected, but if I remained true to myself, I would make it through and grow stronger. He told that my recovery and future were up to me now, and that with God’s help, my sobriety, and the Twelve Steps, I could live a useful, fulfilling and even joyous life.

He was right!
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 09-11-2017, 04:43 PM   #37
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September 11

Quote of the Week

“I don’t like things changing without my permission.”

I used to spend a lot of time and energy trying to arrange life to suit myself. I would like in bed at night planning not only my every move, but yours, too. I even used to think I could manipulate places and things, and I burned up a lot of energy foolishly trying to bend life to my will. And then I would wake up and things would change, so I started all over again trying to twist the changes to my will. I was exhausted when I entered the rooms.

Once I attended about a week of meetings, I started planning how my recovery would go. I laid awake at night thinking about where I would sit at meetings, who would sit next to me, what I would share, etc. I planned out the first year of my sobriety, including the new job I would get, the perfect sober woman I would marry, and the circuit speaking I was sure they were going to ask me to do. And then I woke up and the meeting had moved, my sponsor told me no relationships in the first year, and that I should hold off on changing jobs until I had more time. I started feeling exhausted again…
​​​​​​​
That’s when he told me I might want to “Let go, let God.” My sponsor suggested that I begin taking my life one day at a time, and that I begin asking for God’s will instead of trying to get my own. He told me I would be much more open to the changes that constantly happen in all our lives once I turned things over. It took a lot of practice, but when I started going with the flow and welcoming change, that’s when I began seeing the miracles and opportunities that come with it.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 09-19-2017, 05:17 AM   #38
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September 18

Quote of the Week

“How can I help you?”

Before recovery, I was all about helping myself. At parties, I helped myself to your alcohol and party favors. At work, I helped myself to your leads and referrals and territory. In relationships, I took as much as I could, and I only thought about giving back if it would help to get me more. As my drinking progressed, I helped myself to larger quantities of alcohol until finally someone suggested I get help in A.A.

When I came into the program, everyone seemed so willing to help me. People gave me their phone numbers, they offered me rides, and invited me to fellowship. Someone offered to be my sponsor and take me through the Steps. It was great! But I soon learned that if I wanted to get well, I would have to help myself. It was suggested that I take commitments, go to 90 meetings in 90 days, and help others. At first I resisted helping someone else, after all, I was still new and needed help myself. But then I learned the great truth about this program.

As I began talking to newcomers after meetings, listening to them and sharing what little experience I had, I began feeling better. I found that whenever I was having a tough time, the way out was always to help someone else. As I began sponsoring others, I found that I got just as much out of it as they did. In fact, it felt so good to help others that I began looking for ways to help around the house, at work, or in any situation. These days, whenever I’m feeling anxious about a situation or uncomfortable, I simply ask how I can help.

When I do, I see the wisdom in the saying, “It is always better to give than to receive.”
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 09-26-2017, 05:35 AM   #39
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September 25

Quote of the Week

“Everything I have is the property of A.A.”

When I heard someone share this from the podium in a meeting one day, I was struck with an immense feeling of gratitude for all I have been given in recovery. As I write this this morning, I am on a business trip in Atlanta, GA, having been flown in by a company to work with their employees. I am highly respected (and paid) today. This is a sharp contrast to the unemployed (and unemployable) thief I was when I crawled into the rooms many years ago. Every area of my life has been transformed as well.

Today, I have meaningful relationships that are healthy and mutually fulfilling. I have a fellowship of people who trudge the road of happy destiny with me. Sincere people who would be there for me if I needed them. I am very happily married to a wonderful woman who loves and accepts me for who I am. I also have close friends outside of the program who respect and value my opinion – and me, theirs. Compare this to the lone wolf who had been abandoned by most people, including myself.

But most of all, recovery has given me something I didn’t even know I wanted or could have: peace and serenity. I feel comfortable in my own skin today, something I never had before. All this comes from my relationship with a God of my own understanding. Contrast that with the confirmed agnostic and sometimes atheist who came into the rooms all those dark, drunk days ago. I have more, so much more, in my life today, and I owe it all to the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. Everything I have, and that I am, is truly the property of A.A.

And for that, my gratitude knows no bounds.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 10-04-2017, 05:45 AM   #40
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October 2

Quote of the Week

“Welcome to A.A.; the place where you grow up in public."

After a few months in the program, I began hearing people share that their emotional development stopped at the age they started drinking. They said they felt as if they had the coping skills, and the emotional responses to situations and people, that they had when they were teenagers – or younger. I was seventeen when I started drinking, and I, too, felt baffled at how to deal with people, places, and things. Many of my reactions were that of a selfish and self-centered adolescent.

When I started working the Steps, I heard another common saying that people also felt as if they had missed the day at school when they handed out the instruction manual to life. I really related to that. The good news, my sponsor assured me, was that the Twelve Steps would provide the best instruction ever, and that I only had to be rigorously honest and willing throughout the process. As I uncovered, discovered, and discarded my old self, and built a relationship with my Higher Power, I began to grow up – but it wasn’t always pretty…

I made a lot of mistakes as I evolved and changed over the years. It was often embarrassing, and sometimes even a little humiliating, to admit my mistakes and some of my ongoing selfish thoughts and behaviors in the rooms with other people in meetings. But the acceptance I found, the identification and support I received, made it safe to discover myself and grow into the man I am today. And the laughter! When I learned to laugh at myself, I learned to forgive myself.

And that’s what made growing up in public possible – and even enjoyable at times.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 10-10-2017, 05:39 AM   #41
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October 9, 2017

Quote of the Week

“If I’m invested in the outcome, I’ve kept God out of it.”

I was a big ball of self-will before I entered recovery. In most things, it was my way or the highway. If I couldn’t get my way, I’d change jobs, or relationships, or I’d move. When I planned something, I’d start with the outcome I wanted, and then I invested my time and effort making sure I got it. The trouble is, I often did get what I wanted, but it turned out that it was either never enough, or the wrong kind, or ultimately it wasn’t what I wanted after all.

When I entered the program, I learned an entirely new way of living. The biggest change was to put my will aside and instead ask what God’s will was for me, and then try to follow that. This was as hard as it sounds, because all I knew was dependence on self. But by praying, meditating, running things by others, I often could distinguish my selfish will versus what God would have me do.
​​​​​​​
One of the surest ways I have of testing how much I have truly surrendered to God’s will today is to ask myself how invested in the outcome I am. If I have planned everything out to the last detail, then I can be pretty sure I’m into self-will. But if I instead take the necessary actions, and then suit up and show up to be of service, then I remain open to God’s will. And ultimately, if I’m truly willing to be open, I find that what God has in store for me is always better than what I could have wanted for myself.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 10-17-2017, 06:07 AM   #42
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October 16

Quote of the Week

“When did ( ) become your Higher Power?”

I used to believe that people, places, or things would fix me. I was sure that if only I could get the perfect girlfriend, or that new car, or make enough money, then I would be happy, or secure, or comfortable. But it never worked. Each time I got it – or close enough to it – I would once again feel empty and would set my sights on the next thing I was sure was going to make me all right. I used alcohol in this way for years, but it, too, let me down.

As I started working the Steps, I learned about a Higher Power. I was taught that I have a God-shaped hole in me that I was trying to fill with other, outside things. Through prayer and meditation, I experienced glimpses of the peace and serenity I had been looking for, and each time I turned my will and my life over to His care, and then took the next indicated action, my life got better. But there was a catch…

The catch was that I constantly defaulted back to my will and my old ideas of what I thought would make me happy. Even after years of recovery and experience, I still get side tracked into thinking that more money, or something else, will finally complete me. And that’s when I go back to the source – back to my Higher Power. Today, whenever I feel anxious, restless, or unhappy, I ask myself what has become my H.P.? It’s easy to figure out, and even easier to turn my will and life back over.

When I do, I am restored to the peace and security I always wanted.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 10-24-2017, 06:51 AM   #43
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October 23

Quote of the Week

“All that pain has value.”

When I came into the rooms, I was buried in shame. Without alcohol to escape into, I was overwhelmed with remorse over many of my actions. As I moved towards working the Fourth Step, I was desperately afraid of what I would find in the abyss of self. I was sure that once I uncovered how bad I really was, no one – including myself – would accept me. I was definitely at a jumping off place.

As I began putting my inventories together, I discovered something else though. Yes I had acted poorly and had made many selfish decisions, but I learned that much of my behavior had been driven by the disease of alcoholism. What I found was that my actions weren’t necessarily who I was, they were just my actions. And if I was willing to own those actions, make amends, and stay sober, then I could recover through working the Twelve Steps.

As I continued to uncover, discover, and discard my character defects, I found something even more important. I learned that all my experiences – especially the “bad” ones I felt shame over – would turn out to be the most useful in reaching out to and helping others. I learned that my pain was often the key that allowed others come to terms with and overcome their own pain. All the experiences I had tried to run from had value, and in God’s hands they uniquely qualified me to be of service to His other children.

Today, I no longer wish to shut the door on my past, nor on my pain.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 10-31-2017, 05:38 AM   #44
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October 30

Quote of the Week

“I could drink or I could do everything else.”

By the end of my drinking, my world had gotten very small. I lost my job, again, but this time I didn’t get a new one. Most of my friends and family didn’t want to hang out with me much because I was usually drunk, or on my way there. I had long ago abandoned my hobbies like photography and reading – they tended to get in the way of my drinking. In the end, I was alone on my couch with my booze.

I’ll never forget my first meeting on a Tuesday night in Westwood, CA. It was a large, hip, speaker meeting at a church. There were probably a couple of hundred people there, and it was like I had arrived at a concert. People were talking, laughing, racing in and out of the room at the break. Wow! For a brief instant I felt part of the human race again. Later, I learned that the path back to life was through the Twelve Steps, and I committed to taking them.

As I got sober, my life did open up. There were lots of meetings, sober parties, fellowship and more. I got a job again, learned how to be of service, and started sponsoring others. In sobriety I’ve traveled the world, gotten married, started businesses and written books. And each morning I greet the new day with joy and optimism. These days whenever I think of a drink, I think of everything else I would have to give up.

Nothing, especially a drink, is worth all I’ve been blessed with in recovery.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Old 11-07-2017, 07:14 AM   #45
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November 6

Quote of the Week

“A.A. = A program of 1,000 surrenders.”

I was taught to never give in and never give up. To surrender was to lose, and I was to avoid it at all costs. As such, I led with my ego, and thought that I could bully, cajole, or manipulate my way into getting just about anything I wanted. And for the most part it worked – until my alcoholism took over. After years of trying to control my drinking, I had reached the bitter end. It was either surrender or die.

In the program, the first thing I heard about was surrender. It was something I was very resistant to. My sponsor told me that if I wanted to recover from my alcoholism, then I would have to surrender my will and my life to a Power greater than myself. When I asked him how in the world I was going to do that, he told me he would show me by helping me work the Twelve Step program. He also told me that I would find that it was the easier and softer way to live. When I asked him what else I had to surrender and how often, he told, me, “Everything, all the time.”
​​​​​​​
It has taken me years to see the wisdom in this seemingly impossible statement. But the more I follow it, the better my life goes. When getting sober, I turned my drinking, my career, my relationships, etc., over to my Higher Power, and they all improved. Today, I find that the answer remains the same – whenever my ego is pushing and I’m feeling anxious, depressed or fearful, I ask myself what I need to surrender. As soon as I let go, the situation gets better, and I discover the easier and softer way to live again.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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